***********************W*A*R*N*I*N*G************************
NOTE: Neon Genesis Evangelion and the following fanfic
express religious and moral views which may not coincide
with your own. This fic contains spoilers. Also, the angels
from here on out are not in order of the original series.
Please read at your own risk. Thank you for your time.
************************************************************
Neon Genesis Evangelion (C) GAINAX / Project Eva. * TV Tokyo
* NAS
Released in North America by A.D.V. Films.
Planning and Original Story: GAINAX
This story takes over after NGE 0:6 (ep 12) and has been
affected by the events contained within those episodes.
------------------------------------------------------------
Prologue:
Throughout the course of human existence and
evolution it has always been known that there was a
beginning and end of the great process we humans have
labeled as life. Time acts as a container of all life and
all things living happen into this container. Within this
container is also the end, which is the passing on to a
place wherein time has no effect and no standing what so
ever. This end is known as death and this place, to the
living, is known as the afterlife.
The afterlife is a place wherein a soul may live
through the rest of eternity, or forever, in whichever
manner it so desires or it so chooses to do so. This is
usually to the exclusion of any other souls, however, as
many people have different desires and everyone has a
different way of doing things. Because of this, each soul
inhabits a different reality once it reaches the afterlife.
These realities may meet certain parallels at which
the souls experiencing each reality may lapse into the same
reality, either forever or until one of the soul's realities
splits apart and follows a different path from then on.
There are times, however, where two souls have been
so closely bound in life that they will never be seperated
in the afterlife because of one simple thing. They could not
exist for the rest of forever without the other. Feelings
such as deep-seeded friendship as well as love create these
unbreakable bonds. Not even death can destroy them.
This story is about two such souls whose destinies,
desires, and fates intermingle and intertwine.
------------------------------------------------------------
Presenting-
An original Neon Genesis Evangelion fanfiction
by: Mark Eymer (saotome@micron.net)
Neon Genesis Evangelion
It's Just Been One of Those Lives
Chapter 1
------------------------------------------------------------
It had not been a good day for Asuka Langley Soryu.
The German redhead had been awake for a total of twenty
three and a half minutes and the day already looked rather
bleak.
Furthermore, Asuka was hungry. Now, this wouldn't
have presented such a problem had it been her day for
cooking and such, but as luck would have it, it just so
happened to be Shinji's. Regularly, this also wouldn't have
presented much of a problem but Murphy's Law provided for
such things. Shinji had stayed up late studying for a test
upon the morrow and was yet to awaken. He had deprived
himself of sleep until around two in the morning... precious
sleep which he was now catching up on.
"Alright, then. Shinji, you're just going to have to
get up." Asuka resolutely entered the Third Child's room
with a mission. She would wake the slumbering pilot if it
were the last thing she ever did, provided she didn't lose
interest in the task in the meantime.
Rotating the blinds to a horizontal position, Asuka
introduced light into the otherwise dark environment. This
seemingly had no effect on Shinji, who simply snorted and
continued slumbering.
Alright, thought Asuka to herself, if he wants it
that way... Moving to Shinji's side, Asuka began beckoning
to him while gently shaking his shoulder and standing over
him. This also had no effect.
Turning slightly red, Asuka stormed to her room,
and retrieved her alarm clock. Returning, she plugged it in,
set the time to 12:00 AM and the alarm to 12:01 AM. She then
turned the volume up to its maximum and placed the noisebomb
next to Shinji's head. Asuka grinned evilly and held her
ears to block the forthcoming onslaught.
The alarm exploded into action a few seconds later,
announcing its presence in that annoying way that alarm
clocks do, usually making you bash it with a good sized
sledge. Shinji seemed totally oblivious to this, and Asuka
was contracting a strange affliction of the hearing commonly
referred to as a ringing in the ears. Shutting off the
device, she glared at the slumbering boy.
"Alright, that's it, Shinji! You asked for it!"
Acquiring a cold glass of water from the small kitchen
sported in the apartment, Asuka returned to the room and
charged the prone EVA pilot.
Shinji didn't even see it coming. This was, in part,
because he had his eyes closed in the thrall of slumber, but
it still would have surprised him, had he been awake at the
time. The water struck full force causing the pilot to...
turn over, mumble incoherently, and continue to snore.
"What?!" Asuka couldn't believe it. Climbing upon
the bed, she began jumping up and down. "You want it that
way, you got it, Ikari!"
The one thing Asuka wasn't expecting was the sudden
movement by Shinji to pull the covers more tightly about his
form. This had the effect of unceremoniously dumping the
redhead onto her backside.
"Why you..." Asuka was practically steaming, her
face the same hue as her hair. Mounting the bed a final
time, she sat atop the Third Child and began to beat on his
chest and shake his shoulders while calling his name.
It had not been a good day for Asuka Langley Soryu.
-------------------------
"Shinji... Wake up, Shinji!... SHINJI!"
Deep in his dream, the voice registered, making
Shinji Ikari's subconcious back away, yelping in fear. As he
began to wake from his slumber, Shinji noticed a few things.
Firstly, his eyes registered a red blur which seemed to be
shaking him and kept shouting his name in a familiar voice
which his sleep addled brain could not place just yet.
Secondly, he noticed that afore mentioned red blur (we shall
call this anomaly "Red Blur" from hereon until its identity
is revealed) smelled quite good. It had the distinct smell
of girl which tickled Shinji's nose.
"Shinji Ikari! Wake up!"
Thinking nothing more than about wanting to return
to sleep, Shinji was fully prepared to dismiss his earlier
observations, turn over, dump "Red Blur" onto the floor, and
go back to sleep. About to execute this plan, something
suddenly happened. Two somethings, to be exact, bounced
(bounced?!) off his chest. Red Blur seemed to be shaking
him, making these "things" bounce off him.
Shinji's eyes suddenly snapped into abrupt focus and
Red Blur resolved itself to be none other than Asuka Langley
Soryu, designated pilot of Evangelion Unit 02 and housemate
of Misato Katsuragi and Shinji Ikari. Shinji racked his
brain and, although Asuka was flagged as a housemate, he
found nothing describing the promotion to roommate, let
alone bedmate... and why was his pillow wet?...
"Finally! Dummkopf! How long did you intend to
sleep?!" scolded an irate Asuka.
Ready with a snappy retort, having suddenly grown an
ounce of backbone, Shinji's brain connected three facts.
Namely, Red Blur hadn't moved yet, Red Blur was Asuka, and
Asuka was... straddling him? Asuka, being a very shapely
(for fourteen) redhead who was a romantic interest of
Shinji's, had more than piqued his... curiosity. Said piqued
curiosity was currently beginning to make quiet a bulge in
his pants.
Blood began to drain from Shinji's head to places
lower (as it tends to do for any male beholding a female in
skimpy night clothing) and he panicked. Backpedaling from a
sitting position (quite a feet if you've ever seen it done),
Shinji found himself airborne, as his bed didn't like the
idea of backpedaling with him. A surprised Asuka had no
choice but to fall with, or more acurrately, shortly after
Shinji.
Shinji hit the floor with a thud, followed by Asuka
landing on top of him. This did amazing things for her chest
when mashed against Shinji's, and did things Shinji would
rather not like to think about to his... curiosity. Asuka
began to push herself up, again sitting atop Shinji, and
placed her arms to either side of his head for balance. This
was the precarious scene that Misato Katsuragi walked in on
as she opened the sliding door to see what could cause such
an ungodly amount of racket (other than her, according to
Kaji, of course).
Looking to Asuka, who was currently on top of Shinji
with puckered lips and little clothing, Misato produced a
large bead of sweat. She then took in Shinji's expression
which was a mix between surprise and something else... fear
maybe? Or was that a lecherous glint in his eye?! Finding
her voice, she spoke, "I... I never knew you were so.. so...
aggressive, Asuka... Uh... I'll just leave you two alone..."
Quickly turning, Misato closed the door behind her as she
retreated to the bath and her own introspection.
Asuka sighed, planted her head in her hands, and
shook it back and forth in defeat. "Scheisse. It's already
turning out to be a horrible day."
Shinji could only look on at the beautiful girl
currently astride him. A large bead of sweat rolled down his
head as his... curiosity... nagged at him. He just hoped
Asuka wouldn't notice. After all, he hoped to live a few
more days...
-------------------------
Misato Katsuragi eased herself backwards into the
hot water of the bath. Relishing the feel of the warmth
soaking into her and relaxing the sleep from her muscles,
she began to ponder upon the unexpected sight she had
witnessed within the confines of Shinji's room.
Firstly, she wondered, how had Asuka ended up on top
of Shinji in the first place? She knew that Asuka was
aggressive by nature, as shown in Asuka's second battle with
an Angel. She had attacked on a whim without following op
codes or even standard procedure. Shinji had berated her for
it, but Asuka had done an impressive job of disposing of the
Angel... up until it had split into two seperate Angels and
continued its rampage, anyhow.
Asuka had definitely shown an aggressive streak that
Misato would later lable as "youthful eagerness" or "a
willingness to take charge". That aggression may have been
the reason Misato had found the two as she did. Still,
however... Misato wouldn't have thought of Asuka as that
"youthfully eager" or that "willing to take charge"...
She also suspected that Asuka might have some kind
of affinity toward the younger Ikari, but to act so brashly
as to suddenly decide to pursue Shinji, Misato just couldn't
see. Then again, this was Asuka.
While wondering what actual time Asuka had had to
decide to go after Shinji like that, something occured to
Misato. Remembering back to another instance which also
involved the self-replicating Angel, Misato recalled the
time at which she had had to leave Shinji and Asuka home
alone. Now, this would not have struck as that pressing a
fact had it not also been for the entire night. Misato sat
up in the tub and began mulling the implications over in her
head.
She had left a hormone charged teenaged boy and an
overly aggressive teenaged girl alone, sleeping next to each
other, all night long. "My god..." Misato whispered, "What
could those two have done..." Horrified at what she might
have caused to happen (especially since she might not have
been there to see it), Misato was out of the tub and wrapped
in a towel in a record setting time of 5.764 seconds.
It was now understandable how Asuka could have gone
for Shinji, though. He did strike Misato as the type who had
a kind of charm about him. An endearing quality. She
couldn't describe it, really, but, single-handedly, without
trying, he was just so cute, which was one of the reasons
Misato, herself, liked him so much. She'd never admit to it,
but she really did like Shinji. A lot. He was not that
sociable a person, but he had a magnetism that just seemed
to drew you in.
She resolved that Shinji must have somehow entranced
Asuka with his magnetism and she had grown a certain
affinity towards him. More than any simple affinity,
guessing from the way she was... straddling him. My, Misato
began thinking to herself, kids these days move quickly in
relationships. And I thought we adults were bad. Sheesh.
Grinning evilly, she resolved to get the truth out
of the two if it was the last thing she ever did. It just
wouldn't be right for her to miss out on perfectly good
material she could use to tease (torment) the two about
later on.
Of course, she never considered the fact that the
earlier scene could have very well been nothing more than a
mere circumstantial misunderstanding. Misato also never
considered the fact that the reason she was always getting
herself into trouble was because she failed to look at the
option that it all could have been a mistake...
Misato decided to confront the two about the earlier
incident later. Right now, she wanted a beer. Maybe three.
-------------------------
Asuka.
A whisper, barely audible among the ring of silence,
escaped the lips of Shinji Ikari, "Asuka..."
Since the day he had met her, Shinji had had an
extremely annerving problem. Namely, he could not get that
girl, Asuka Langley Soryu, out of his head. For all her
teasing and all her obnoxiousness, he couldn't find a way to
really dislike her. She could be an annoyance at times, but
Shinji couldn't hold that against her, for some reason. She
also drove him to anger, but that soon passed as well, for
the younger Ikari.
Her aggression and independence, while pushing him
away, also excited him for reasons unbeknownst. Shinji had
known her for a truly short time, yet, whenever he beheld
her, his blood seemed to run faster in his veins.
Another part of his brain also argued that for all
her attributes, Asuka had a few down points as well, such as
her rash and often hastily made decisions. She also had a
serious problem with authority. This had been readily
demonstrated when she had disregarded procedures to simply
attack the first angel she had ever come into contact with.
Shinji somewhat disputed that last thought, however,
justifying her actions by the fact that is she hadn't
attacked, a lot of innocent people would have perished.
Shinji could admit that he was truly beguiled by the
young redhead. Who wouldn't be, he began thinking, until
recalling Touji and Kensuke's reaction to her. Alright, he
ammended, who--other than those two--wouldn't be?
But, how could he measure up to her standards? Asuka
was completely and thoroughly taken with Kaji, much to the
consternation of Misato. Shinji suspected that Misato felt
more for Kaji than outwardly apparent... shaking the stray
thought off and returning to his current focus, Shinji
sighed more audibly this time.
Obviously, he could never measure up to Kaji, being
nothing like him. How could she expect such high standards
from him? How could she expect Shinji to change who he was
until it conformed to something that wasn't him? Suddenly,
it hit him. She didn't want him to be like Kaji, and she
didn't want him to change. To Shinji, the only obvious
conclusion was this: Asuka did not want him at all.
"Asuka Langley Soryu..." Shinji sighed deeply. His
heart painfully ached to be with that wonderful girl that he
had so scarcely seen in Asuka. The caring, fragile,
beautiful girl that she kept chained inside of her, masked
by some unknown pain. When it came down to it, pain was one
of the only things they shared in common, and pain was the
last thing Shinji ever would have wanted to share with
Asuka.
"Oh, Asuka..." Shinji began, "why am I doing this to
myself over you?" Sighing, Shinji retrieved his school bag
and quietly exited his room, readying himself for the rest
of the day.
Clearing his mind of all thoughts pertaining to
Asuka, Shinji entered the apartment's small kitchen. He had
breakfast to prepare.
-------------------------
A ring of the doorbell was all the warning Shinji
required. Hefting his school bag he bid farewell to Misato
and practically shoved Touji Suzuhara and Kensuke Aida, his
classmates and best friends, out the door in his rush to
depart.
"Hey, Ikari! What gives?!" Inquired a slightly
irritated Touji.
"Hmm?... Oh, nothing. Let's just go, ok?" Replied
Shinji, a distant look to his features. The three began
their daily walk to school in silence.
Leaning over to his cohort, Kensuke whispered to
Touji, "What d'ya think's wrong with him today?"
Shrugging to Kensuke, Touji hushedly replied, "I'm
not sure, but I'll bet it has something to do with Asuka,
that witch."
Kensuke replied with a conspiratorial nod.
Indeed Asuka was the only thing on Shinji's mind.
Particularly, her behavior during breakfast. She hadn't paid
him an ounce of attention, other than to bark at him for his
tardiness in the preparation of the meal, and then she
hadn't even eaten most of it.
Shinji could not, for the life of him, understand
girls. Misato was beginning to become a little easier to
read, but Asuka remained the enigma she had always been. The
more he got to know her the more he realized he didn't know
her. She baffled him. She had gone to all that trouble to
wake him up to cook breakfast, and then hadn't eaten more
than a few bites of it. Something just didn't add up.
Aside from the ordeal at breakfast, she had also
seemed somewhat distant when he tried approaching her about
the morning. She had simply told him to go away and ask her
later. That was before she had disappeared into the
bathroom, however. To Shinji's knowledge, she had been there
until he had left. Sighing, he let himself slip deeper into
the recesses of thought.
And why did she--
"IKARI!"
Shinji was interrupted by Touji yelling in his ear.
"What do you want?!" shouted Shinji in reply.
"We were just wondering what's on your mind,"
answered Kensuke.
Shinji stared incredulously at the two for a moment
before sighing. "Nothing. Nothing at all."
Kensuke and Touji gave each a knowing look. Nothing
incites suspicion like evasive action.
-------------------------
Asuka sat against the bathroom's sliding door with
her head in her hands. The painful memories of her mother's
suicide always chose seemingly peaceful moments to resurface
and haunt her.
During breakfast, for example, Asuka had been calmly
sitting, awaiting the meal she had strived so hard to get,
when she was suddenly taken up with thoughts of her mother.
Things she hadn't even realized she knew suddenly came
flooding back into her head with surprising clarity.
How she had smelled. How she had moved. How she had
sounded. Asuka couldn't remember any of these things upon
normal reflection, however she had suddenly recalled those
facts with a frightening clarity. It had been as if she was
reliving that horrible day all over again.
That was when Shinji had approached her asking her
to talk to him about something. She hadn't been paying much
attention to him at the time and thus had not picked up what
else he had said. She had muttered some excuse and had run
for the bathroom. How could she let him see her like this?
She was a pillar of strength and confidence. She couldn't
crumble in front of Shinji... not that wimp. Especially in
memory of her mother. Her deceased mother who would never
return. Her mother who had taken her own life--
No! She wouldn't! She would not drive her thoughts
back to that time. The time that Asuka Langley Soryu had
been forced to give up her childhood. The time she had been
pushed into a painful and lonely reality where she had found
her mother... attached to a noose.
Shaking the horrible thoughts from her head, Asuka
wiped a stray tear from her eye. She had to be strong. Had
to be strong for herself. Her strength was the only thing
that mattered now. It was the only thing she had left.
Asuka buried the memories and pain under her usual
veil of confidence and arrogance. She built her crumbled
walls back up in preparation of the upcoming day.
Hearing Shinji make his exit, Asuka rose to her feet
and left the bathroom.
She would never admit it later on, but Asuka had
thought of Shinji Ikari, as well. She thought of the boy who
could raise her hopes and her spirits. The boy who had saved
her life on a few occasions. A painful crack began to appear
in Asuka's barriers as memories of her mother's betrayal
began to resurface again. Her mother had sacrificed it all.
She had refused to be saved from herself...
-------------------------
School hadn't gone as well as Shinji had expected it
to. Lecture after boring lecture had nearly driven him to
the wonderful obliviousness of sleep. Shinji never realized
before that the subject of life before the Second Impact,
the wonderful twentieth century, could be so boring.
Hearing of the pre-Impact years also brought somber
thoughts to his head, however. Those years had held nothing
but a gloomy, corrupted and utterly hopeless time which was
masked by an unwarranted optimism throughout the people for
a better tomorrow. That optimism had exploded in their faces
along with the continent of Antarctica. The Second Impact
had killed over half of the world's population and plunged
humanity into its darkest hour.
This fact troubled Shinji's conciousness. He had
been concieved upon this catastrophic event. Asuka and Rei
had also obviously been concieved, as well.
With a new pathway to follow, Shinji's wandering
mind turned to the subject of Asuka.
She had completely tuned him out throughout the
entire day which had only succeeded in adding to his dark
mood. She hadn't even spared him so much as a sideways
glance.
After the lunch hour she had seemed to have returned
to her old self, trading conversation with friends and even
sparing the time to insult Shinji a time or two. However,
there had been something in her eyes.
He had seen the masked pain as clear as day. You
don't live with someone for an extended period of time
without learning something about them.
To top off all of these events, Shinji was currently
sitting in an entry plug, breathing LCL.
Specialty harmonics tests were Shinji's least
favorite thing only to the prospect of death itself. In
other words, he hated them.
As the plug was dipped increasingly further into the
contaminated area, Shinji concentrated more on the test
going on around him. Thoughts of the day slipped from his
head as sweat began to bead at his brow from his continued
mental effort.
-------------------------
In the control room opposite of the testing area,
Misato Katsuragi stood, stunned at the results which were
currently being produced by Shinji Ikari, the Third Child.
He was currently passing Rei Ayanami and even Asuka Langley
Soryu's current readings. His harmonics had far exceeded
even Ritsuko Akagi's speculations of what he might have
achieved by now.
It was almost as if he had been born for the sole
purpose of piloting an Eva...
Flipping on the intercom into the entry plug of Unit
01, she prepared to announce the news to him to help raise
his morale. It will be good for him to have some successes,
she thought to herself.
"Shinji?... Shinji, are you there?"
An excited reply greeted her ears, "Oh! Hey, Misato!
What can I do for you?"
"Listen up, Shinji... Your sync rate has passed Rei
and Asuka's. You're number one!"
Misato beheld Shinji's shining eyes through the
entry plug's video link and her heart leapt in her chest. It
was so good to see his confidence grow. He needed it, poor
boy, Misato thought to herself as she shut down the video
and comm links into the entry plug and ordered the children
to the showers.
The test results were gathered and it was time for
celebration in light of Shinji's personal victory. Time for
beer. Misato always looked forward to a good excuse to get
thoroughly sloshed.
In the entry plug of Unit 02, a redheaded soul sat
in an unnatural silence with her head bowed in defeat. As
Asuka Langley Soryu waited to be released from her plug by
the NERV Technical Crew, a lone tear ran down her cheek.
There would be no celebration for her tonight. She
had lost. She had lost to Shinji Ikari...
-------------------------
Somewhere in Tokyo-3 a strange silence permeated the
area. Flocks of birds could be seen making a hasty retreat
from the mysteriously deserted streets as a large, eliptical
shadow moved from beneath a car into the surrounding city.
Soon after the shadow had fully uncovered itself,
another strange object entered the area. A large sphere,
about 600 meters in diameter, appeared above the shadow. The
sphere itself was covered in a strange recurring pattern of
black and white stripes, seemingly random in placement.
Moving at an agonizingly slow pace, the giant sphere and its
enigmatic shadow began to steadily traverse Tokyo-3.
An angel was roaming.
-------------------------
"Evactuation of the western district underway."
The floating object which had recently appeared in
the skies of Tokyo-3 had not gone unnoticed by NERV. A
computer synthesized voice was currently outlining which
procedure was currently underway in preparation for the new
entity.
Misato burst into the central command center of NERV
while still pulling on her jacket. An annoyed Ritsuko turned
an unapproving glance the woman's way and shouted, "You're
late, Major!"
Withering under the gaze, Misato totally avoided the
observation, "What's going on?!"
Hyuga was the first to respond. "Pattern orange. No
AT field detected. It suddenly appeared out of no where!"
"A new type of angel?!" Ritsuko asked.
"Unknown, ma'am," replied Maya Ibuki. "The Magi are
currently withholding their judgment on that."
Looking to the Commander's platform of the command
center Misato sighed. "Just perfect that the commander isn't
here again. Launch Eva's 00, 01, and 02. Destroy that
angel."
-------------------------
As the sphere slowly passed through buildings inside
the city, Unit 01 beheld it from a somewhat safe vantage.
Shinji was currently behind a highrise with a small pistol.
Misato's voice suddenly came over the communications port of
the Eva.
"Shinji, Asuka, Rei... I've sent you all of the
known target data. That's currently all we have on the angel
so far. Attack normally and try to observe it's reaction.
Try to lure it outside the city if at all possible. Back
each other up, as well."
Not having rid the earlier defeat from her mind,
Asuka smugly commented, "Don't you think Shinji ought to
take point, though?" She put as much sarcasm as she could
muster into the next part in an attempt to irk Shinji.
"It would only be fair that the point position go to the
highest synch ratio of them all, don't you think?"
Shinji turned to regard Asuka's Eva with a hint of
distaste evident in his expression. Damn how she could push
him to the limit sometimes... Replying without thinking he
shouted, "Fine, Asuka! I'll show -you- how to do it!"
"What was that?!" was Asuka's unbelieving reply.
"Stop fighting, you two!" came Misato's moderating
voice.
"Combat's a man's job! And besides, I have the best
sync ratio, right Misato?" Shinji's visual link closed down,
leaving a stewing Asuka and slightly perplexed Rei.
"Unit 02 will back him up. Stupid jerk."
"Unit 00 will back up, as well."
Both Rei and Asuka's links closed and the children
moved into position.
-------------------------
Misato frowned. "I don't believe these kids."
Ritsuko smugly replied, "Shinji's hormones are
kicking in, aren't they?"
"I'll have to chew him out when he gets back."
Ritsuko smirked. "Of course, you're the model
guardian."
Misato gave her a withering gaze.
-------------------------
Shinji silently waited for the angel behind a large
building. "Ayanami, Asuka, are you in position yet?"
"Eva 00 is still getting there."
Asuka's annoyed response soon followed Rei's calmer
reply, "You know an Eva can't move that fast you twit!"
Sighing in resignation, Shinji remained in wait. An
eternity seemed to pass and his anxiety finally got the
better of him. Turning around the corner he quickly took aim
and fired three shots at the floating sphere.
The sphere suddenly disappeared, leaving only the
smoking trails of the three expired rounds in the sky.
-------------------------
Ritsuko surged forward in surprise, "It vanished!"
Hyuga shouted out the current readings, "Pattern
blue! Angel confirmed! And it's right under Unit 01!"
"Shinji!" Misato shouted.
-------------------------
At Shinji's feet the shadow seemed to surge into
place and morphed into a quicksand like mass. He watched,
mind frozen in terror as he began to slowly sink into the
shadow.
Firing three rounds into the black mass, he didn't
even dent the entity. Panicked, he looked skyward, only to
see that sphere, floating menacingly above him as he
continued to slowly sink into the shadow.
"Misato! What the hell is going on here?! Misato!!"
"Ikari!" Rei's voice worriedly shouted over the comm
link.
Asuka's soon followed, "Idiot! Get out of there!"
Shinji's Eva had sunk to neck depth in the shadow,
and was still going. Fear gripped his very being as the
Eva's head finally passed below the shadow.
"Misato! Misato! Help me! Misa--"
Radio contact to Eva 01 suddenly went black.
"Shinji!" Misato yelled.
-------------------------
Both Eva 00 and 02 had been ordered to pull back
after the failed attempt to rescue Unit 01. They returned
with heavy hearts.
After realing back in the umbilacle cable of Unit 01
and finding no Shinji at the other end, Ritsuko soon
calculated that Shinji had a total of about sixteen hours of
energy left in the Eva, provided that he didn't go groping
around blindly in the dark and kept the Eva in the lowest
life support mode.
Misato, Asuka, Rei, and a group of other NERV
personnel had met toward the outskirts of Tokyo-3. On the
embankment of the mountain they were currently stationed at
they quietly looked on at the sphere which dominated the
skyline.
It had not moved as of late, and its shadow had
stopped expanding some time ago. The entire thing had gone
completely and utterly silent... with no signs of Shinji.
Misato lowered her observation goggles at the sound
of Asuka's voice.
"Well, taking matters into his own hands, I guess he
got what he deserved. Just because he got a better score
than mine, why'd he have to try to show me how it ought to
be done?" Turning around from her vantage of Eva 00 and 02,
Asuka forced a laugh. "Dummkopf!"
Rei stepped suddenly in front of Asuka with an
eerily angered expression upon her pale features.
"What?! Are my comments about Shinji pissing you
off, Wondergirl?!" Asuka shouted in Rei's face.
"I wonder," Rei calmly replied, "do you only pilot
an Eva for the praise of others?"
"What do you mean?! I don't need anyone's approval
but my own!"
"Cut it out, you two," Misato cut in. "Asuka's
right. He acted without consulting anyone." Looking less
certain of herself, she added, "I guess... I'll just have to
punish him when he comes back..."
The three stood in silence, looking at the shadow
and the sphere... wondering how Shinji was. If he was alive.
-------------------------
Shinji Ikari was alive. He was currently sitting in
his entry plug, thinking. One tends to let one's mind wander
a little when one has had twelve hours to oneself to think.
"I never knew doing nothing could be this
exhausting."
Connecting the nerve links to the Eva, Shinji took
another look into the void he was currently inside. Nothing
but white noise. Looking to his plug suit's timer, he noted
the time he had currently been inside the Eva.
"My life will end in three or four hours."
"I'm hungry."
-------------------------
"You mean the shadow is actually its body?!" Misato
questioned.
"Yes," replied Ritsuko, "its body is an inverse AT
field and inside that space is a region that can only be
defined using abstract mathematics, a sea of Durak. Another
universe, maybe."
"Then what about the sphere?"
"The sphere in the sky seems to disappear whenever
the imaginary circuit to the body closes. This implies that
the sphere is a shadow of sorts."
"So the sphere isn't the enemy... the shadow is..."
"Then there's no way we can fight it," Asuka quietly
added.
-------------------------
The LCL surrounding Shinji suddenly began to exhibit
a cloudiness. Needless to say, this didn't escape Shinji's
immediate attention. "No! The LCL purification system has
gone down!"
On the verge of complete and utter panic, Shinji
also noticed something else. "This place smells like blood!"
This had gone unquestioned before, but in his current state,
Shinji was quite frightened by this.
Reaching above himself, he began to pull at the
hatch release mechanism to the entry plug. The mechanism
that would not work. He began to beat on the inside of the
entry plug as he shouted, "Help! Somebody help me! I hate
this place! Let me out! Misato! Ayanami! Asuka! Help!
Ritsuko!..." A strangled sob escaped his lips as he called
out the last person he would ever want help from,
"Father..."
"Someone help me," Shinji whimpered as he broke down
under the mental strain and began to cry.
-------------------------
"You're going to blow the shadow up?!"
"I'm afraid it's our only viable option," replied
Ritsuko calmly. "The plan is to drop all 992 existing N2
mines into the targets center. If we can use the AT fields
of both the remaining Evas we can disrupt the hypothetical
circuit that encloses the angel.
"If we can utilize all of the explosive power in
that same microsecond, then we can destroy the Durak Sea
that makes up the angel's body, as well as the angel
itself."
"But what about the pilot?!" Misato asked. "Shinji
wouldn't survive!"
"Our top priority is to get Eva back, even if it has
to be destroyed to do so."
"Now wait a second!"
"Under these conditions the pilot's life is
irrelevant."
These words his Misato with more force than anything
else ever had. An uncontrollable rage awakened inside of her
and she suddenly lashed out, slapping Ritsuko across the
face.
Ritsuko placed a hand to her stinging cheek and
angrily shouted, "It's your responsibility if Shinji's lost,
Misato! Need I remind you of that?! I'm taking full control
of this operation, effective immediately!"
That said, Dr. Ritsuko Akagi took her leave.
The Second Impact, The Instumentality Project, Adam,
there are so many things I'm in the dark about. Misato's
troubled mind began to question NERV's real purpose for the
first time.
-------------------------
What was that?!
Who?
Who?... Shinji Ikari.
That's me!
I am you. The self incorporates another self. The
self has always been composed of two selves.
Two?
Yes, the self which is observed and the self which
obeserves the self. To exbound, there is the Shinji Ikari in
Asuka Langley Soryu's mind, the Shinji Ikari in Rei
Ayanami's mind, the Shinji Ikari in Misato Katsuragi's mind
and the Shinji Ikari in Gendo Ikari's mind. All are true
Shinji Ikaris. What you fear is the Shinji Ikaris that exist
in the mind's of others.
I'm just afraid of being hated.
You're afraid of being hurt.
Who is bad?
Father is. The father who deserted us.
No, I'm bad! I'm worthless... I thought I hated my
father, but now I'm not sure.
Will you live the rest of your life recalling those
few pleasant memories?
Everyone does it. That's how everyone survives!
You have been shutting your eyes to that which you
wish to avoid.
No, I don't want to hear this!
You're doing it again. No one can justify their own
existence by encorporating their happiest memories into some
sort of rosarie.
Why won't you leave me alone?!...
-------------------------
"The entry plug energy reserves should be reaching
about zero by now. It's life support system's should be at
redline soon."
"Well," began Ritsuko Akagi, "we'll forward the plan
by nine minutes. Let's do this while there's a possibility
that Shinji's still alive."
-------------------------
"Cold. So cold." Shinji sat inside his entry plug,
curled into a ball. He shivered slightly.
"All the heat systems and the oxygen is giving out,"
he weakly observed.
Clenching his eyes as he curled himself tighter, he
whimpered, "I'm so cold..."
"This is the end... So tired- of everything. So
tired-"
Shinji's eyes closed and his face relaxed, leaving
him with a serene look. Peace had found the tortured soul of
Shinji Ikari.
-------------------------
He suddenly felt a presence around him. Something
against his cheek, and he was floating in the arms of a
beautiful woman. The woman was transparent, and seemed to
glow somehow.
"Mother?.." Shinji weakly asked, as he realized that
he was completely naked, like the woman.
"Is this enough? Well, that's good for you," a voice
played in Shinji's mind. A voice he could scarcely recall
ever hearing. The voice of his mother.
Shinji blurrily opened his eyes to behold an empty
entry plug... and everything went black.
-------------------------
"Both units standing by. T-minus 60 seconds to mine
drop," announced a voice over the NERV intercom.
Indeed, both Asuka and Rei were stationed in their
Eva's just beside the boundaries of the angel's body.
Looking into the black void before them, neither could
believe that Shinji was about to be lost... forever.
A red crack suddenly split the entire shadow at its
center, starting at the edge and running into the middle.
"What the hell is that?!" shouted Asuka in surprise.
Chunks of the void before her seemed to be breaking
away from the shadow as the entire body began to quake and
tremble. Waves seemed to play across the surface.
In the command center, an air of general uncertainty
had asserted itself as NERV personnel tried vainly to find
out what was going on.
"What's happening?!" asked Misato as alarm after
was set off around her and the rest of the staff.
"The gauges are going off the scale," replied Maya
Ibuki. "Something's happening -inside- the angel!"
All eyes turned to the sphere as it began to distort
itself. All color faded from the giant ball and it turned
completely black before an arm tore through the side of it,
followed shortly by an enormous spray of blood.
The arm began to pull at the opening, revealing the
head of an Evangelion. Blood sprayed from the ravaged sphere
as the Eva tore itself free from its prison and the newly
released Unit 01 opened its mouth in defiance and roared
mightily.
"My God," whispered Ritsuko Akagi as she watched in
horrified silence as the Eva struggled against its adversary
to get free.
The sides of the sphere tore completely apart,
leaving the Eva to fall freely to the ground. Solidified
shadow gave way as the Evangelion landed, surrounded by
the gory remains of the sphere as they rained down upon the
surrounding area.
A triumphant, blood soaked Evangelion Unit 01 was
left standing in the midst of the defeated angel. The
horrifying visage of uncontrolled rage, covered in the
gore of an enemy greeted the gaze of anyone who looked
toward the Eva. It had escaped.
-------------------------
A sound roused Shinji from his unconciousness.
Someone seemed to be quietly calling his name. Also, he
could here the sounds of someone toiling to open a large,
metallic object, presumably the entry plug he found himself
in.
"Shinji... Shinji!"
The hatch of the plug opened suddenly, revealing
Misato Katsuragi, tears streaming from her eyes. "Shinji!
Shinji are you all right?!" Upon seeing the near dead pilot,
Misato broke down into a series of pitiful sniffles and
wheezing sobs. "Oh, God, Shinji... we thought we'd lost
you!" the hysterically crying woman sobbed into Shinji's
chest. Misato looked up and probed Shinji's half closed eyes
with her own. "Don't ever do that again," Misato sniffled.
She then dropped her head back to his chest and used him to
collect her tears.
Weakly raising his arms, Shinji placed them gently
around Misato's shoulders and comforted her, "I j-just
wanted to see you all one last time... before... before I
died." Misato could do nothing but cry harder.
Asuka approached from her own Evangelion and stood
next to the opened plug. She quietly wiped away a tear of
her own and whispered, "I'm glad that you're okay,
Shinji..."
Shinji had the presence of mind to look surprised
before he silently lost conciousness. The loss of life
support systems had taken its toll on him.
-------------------------
Shinji had been moved from the entry plug of Unit 01
to the NERV infirmary and was currently surrounded by a
group of doctors and nurses, trying to treat his extensive
wounds and trying to fix his lack of life support.
Suddenly, a straight, horizontal line began to run
through the pulse monitor and it's methodic beeping of
Shinji's pulse took on the nightmarishly unwavering sound
of an expired heartbeat.
"Flatline! We have a flatline!"
"What?!" Shock was written all over Misato's face.
Her heart constricted as she regarded the single, unmoving
line which passed across the pulse monitor. Tears sprang
anew into the eyes of Misato Katsuragi.
"Shinji..." Asuka whimpered, looking to the lifeless
pilot. She didn't know it, and would deny it later, but
tears began to collect in the redhead's eyes as she watched
the doctors begin to work on the body in front of her. The
mere shell of a boy who she had seen living not but a scant
twenty seconds ago. A tear lazily made its way down Asuka's
cheek and dripped off her chin as her trembling lips gently
whispered, "Shinji... no."
-------------------------
The last thing Shinji heard was Asuka whimpering his
name in a barely audible voice. A sudden feeling of limbo
set in as the young pilot was pulled from his body and sent
spiraling through a black void at an amazing rate. He found
himself floating above the infirmary bed where his body lay.
Shinji felt the differences between this new body
and the one he was currently staring at. Most notably, he
had no physical sensations. He could see which way was up,
yet he could not discern if he was facing in that direction
or not.
As far as Shinji could tell, he couldn't hear
anything, yet could read the thoughts from their owner's
heads directly.
His sight was something new as well in that he could
take in everything around him without maneuvering about.
This feeling excited and frightened him. Being a point of
conciousness was a totally new thing to Shinji. He rather
enjoyed it, yet still regarded it with somewhat mixed
emotions.
What am I doing up here? Shinji thought to himself
as he witnessed the doctor's attempt to resuscitate him. He
could see Misato standing off to one side, tears running
freely down her face, as she whispered something to herself
over and over again.
Gaining a sense of how to move in this new form,
Shinji floated closer to the violet haired woman as she
sobbed into her hands. He caught the tail end of her
whisper, however. "Please, Shinji... don't die. Don't die."
Those simple thoughts impacted Shinji's being as
nothing else had. Realization washed over him and everything
suddenly fell into place. He was dead. Looking to Asuka and
Rei, he took in somewhat similar reactions to his passing.
Rei seemed to be grimly observing the scene unfolding before
her while Asuka looked to be in denial of the whole event.
Tears streamed unbidden from the redhead's face as she
whispered, over and over, "No, Shinji... no..." Shinji's
being ached to comfort her. To somehow tell her that he was
fine.
And he was perfectly fine. A torent of unbidden
emotions engulfed Shinji's spirit. Most noteably, a great
sense of peace, like nothing he had ever experienced,
settled into him. Following this was an ineffable amount of
understanding. Shinji, for the first time ever, was at
peace. A peace he couldn't reach in life. One which he had
only reached in death...
-------------------------
Doctors and nurses scrambled to bring the dead pilot
back to life. All around the body of Shinji Ikari, people
were attempting to regain a pulse of some kind.
"Clear!" shouted a doctor as he pushed two small,
handle shaped objects to Shinji's chest. The pulse monitor
made a small beep as his heart was forced to beat once by
the electrical charge that raised Shinji's body from the
operating table.
The single, unchanging line returned to the screen,
however, and the doctor began recharging for his next
attempt at resuscitation.
Misato watched in shocked horror as the body again
surged skyward when jolted by the electricity. Turning her
teary eyed gaze to Asuka, she noticed that each time Shinji
was propelled into the air, Asuka flinched and another tear
escaped the redhead's eyes.
-------------------------
Suddenly, Shinji found himself in a dark area. This
area seemed to be devoid of anything and everything yet
Shinji could still sense something about himself. More of a
presence, actually. The presence of some type of being. The
being emanated intense feelings of goodwill and love toward
Shinji, and almost seemed to greet him as he arrived.
Shinji could tell that this being was not an all
knowing being. He didn't know by confirmation, but the
knowledge just seemed to leap unbidden into his head. This
new way of communicating was strange to Shinji and baffled
him to some extent.
And then, there seemed to be a question. Are you
ready to die? This question was simply asked. He could not
find the slightest hint of accusation or recrimination in
the way it had come to him.
Shinji would have blinked had he been physically
able to. The question seemed to have suddenly happened into
his thoughts. The figure hadn't said a thing, yet Shinji
could still tell that the question had originated from the
being.
Shinji thought about the question, and, the more he
thought, the more he realized that he truly didn't know if
he was ready to die yet. He certainly didn't want to return
to the life he had led before dying, yet he also couldn't
bear to leave that life.
Didn't he owe humanity something? Didn't duty make
it unsaid that he should return to protect humanity from the
angels? No. A single word ran clear in Shinji's mind. He
owed humanity nothing. Yet, something else kept him back.
Held him from making the decision to stay, and to remain
dead. Asuka. He couldn't leave her.
I... I can't die, yet. I can't leave Asuka like
this... or Misato... or Rei... Please. I don't want to die.
Shinji tried to communicate his pleas to the being as best
he could. He only hoped that he would be understood... and
that he might be able to return...
Shinji Ikari... you have been granted another chance
at life. Go back with the knowledge that you have been
released for the time being, but you will return. Do not be
afraid. Embrace change, as well as the chance to learn. Do
not squander your remaining life.
A great relief flooded Shinji's spirit and, just as
suddenly as he had found himself leaving his body, he now
found himself returning to it.
-------------------------
The doctors had been working on bringing Shinji back
for a solid ten minutes. Almost no hope remained of reviving
the boy.
With a heavy heart the doctor resolved to try one
last time. If nothing happened, then he would note the date
and time of death and that would be that.
Placing the handles to the bodies chest for the
final time, Shinji again lurched upward. The single beat of
the heart played across the pulse monitor, and for a scant
second, returned to the flatline. Suddenly, another arch,
lower this time, passed across the monitor followed by
another.
"We have a heartbeat!"
Misato fell to her knees, the revival of Shinji
being more than the poor woman could handle. Asuka reacted
similarly and simply crumpled to the floor in a disheveled
heap. Tears of unrestrained happiness fell from her eyes as
she held her knees.
Rei's voice could not be heard over the general
victorious bustle in the infirmary, but she gently and
quietly stated to Shinji's unconcious form, "Well, that's
good for you. Welcome back, Ikari." A lone tear traveled
down the red eyed, blue haired girl's cheek.
-------------------------
Shinji's eyes slowly opened to the bland ceiling of
the infirmary. This ceiling which he hated so much to wake
up to didn't elicit the same feelings as upon previous
times. Slowly dropping his gaze to the side, he looked to
the wall and collected his thoughts.
Shinji recounted the numerous events of the day. The
morning, the angel, his own death. It is said that a trip
into the afterlife has the effect of inspiring and changing
people. Shinji's trip was no exception. He knew that he had
some major changes to make in the way that he was living.
Shinji was determined to live his remaining life to the
fullest, and to make the most out of what was offered to
him.
The day had certainly ended better than it had begun
for Shinji Ikari. He looked forward to many more of them.
------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter Notes:
This series is simply how I would see NGE end. It
forms its own alternate reality, wherein I have tried to
keep the light hearted humor (although not too evident in
this story) as well as the touching moments and serious
times. Please keep in mind that this is only the first
chapter of however many I end up with, as I do plan to
continue. This has a long way to go to come to the closure
which I would like it to. Comments and criticism are always
welcome.
Special thanks go to:
-GAINAX / Project Eva. and Hideki Anno for this wonderfully
thought provoking universe wherein I can spend my time.
-A.D.V. Films for releasing this with such appropriate voice
actors. Those against dubs in general must hate them, but I
personally like them.
-Andrew Huang for stimulating many of the thoughts that went
into this piece, growing from my discussions with him about
his own series, Neon Genesis Evanjellydonut (Great fic).
And to:
-White Wolf and the FFML for being a place wherein I may
spread the offspring of my brain and imagination.
Thank you for reading,
Mark Eymer (saotome@micron.net)