[Scene: Gary, Hiroshi, and Daisuke are sitting around a mostly bare
room, looking bored.]

Hiroshi: I'm bored.

Daisuke: Yeah, you look that way.

Gary: Hey, you guys, we're on Shonen Sunday Theater 3000! The Principal
must be sending us another fic to comment on!

[The computer monitor in the room turns on, to show the Principal with
Ms. Hinako.]

Principal: Aloooha, keiki! Today we got de biiiiig surprise!

Hiroshi: A fic for us to comment on?

Principal: How ya guessin'?

Daisuke: We're psychic. I don't suppose it's a lemon?

Hinako: You naughty boys aren't old enough for lemons! I hope it's some
nice, wholesome WAFF. WAFF is yummy!

Principal: De fic is "Wasurerarenai" by Emily Siazon. It ain't quite
WAFF, but it got de romantic bits.

Hiroshi: It IS a lemon then!

Gary: Not those 'bits', moron!

Principal: Roll 'em!

[Screen dissolves into the fanfic....]

Emily Siazon <emily9@bellatlantic.net> wrote in archive/latest/48606:

"WASURERARENAI"(Unforgettable)

Daisuke: The title of this fic is Unforgettable.

Gary: I always forget how to spell it, though.

An alternative reality fanfic written by Emily Siazon.

Hiroshi: Isn't what that kid says to turn into Captain Marvel?
"SIAZON!!"

Chapter 14
**********

    "Wait up," Ranma yelled as he ran up the hill towards Akane. He
had almost missed her in her hurry to save Shinnosuke. Fortunately,

Daisuke: And here I thought Ranma had a good aim.

Ranma caught a glimpse of her as he was leaving his tent.

    Akane gave the stranger an odd look and answered, "Do I know
you?"

    "I'm Ranma."

    <Where have I heard that name before,> she wondered. "You
wouldn't happen to be violent, would you?"

    "That's _rampant_."

Daisuke: Uh... what?

Hiroshi: That joke's not very good.

Gary: Can we help come up with a better one, guys?

Hiroshi: "You wouldn't happen to be a short poem with only two rhymes
throughout and opening words used twice in refrain, would you?"

Gary: What the heck is that?

Hiroshi: Rondeau!

Gary: Too obscure.

Hiroshi: How about "a piece of music with leading theme that occurs..."

Gary: Give me that dictionary back.

Daisuke: Maybe we should just forget it.

    "No way! It's too dangerous!" Ranma yelled back while he tried to
protect her from the falling debris.

    "But it's to save Shinnosuke's life!" Receiving no answer, she
looked up at his impassive face and snarled. "You bastard! You want
him dead, don't you?!"

    Akane pried herself away from him and glared before she stalked
outside. "I hate you."

Gary: Ouch, that's nasty.

Daisuke: Look on the bright side. If she hates Ranma, maybe she'll go
out with us!

Gary: Not likely.

    It had seemed so simple when he had left Nerima yesterday. He had
decided to help her. Because it was the honarable thing to do. Because
he wanted to protect her. And because her happiness was more important
than his.

    But... didn't he deserve to be happy, too?

Hiroshi: Well...

Daisuke: Now that you mention it...

Gary: It's a rhetorical question, guys.

H&D: Oh.

Gary: I think this is good emotional drama so far.

    She was about to rant again about the absurdity of this whole
plan when bubbles appeared on the usually placid lake. She quickly
stood up, giving the body of water a nervous glance.

    "I-It can't be!" She leaned against the edge of the cliff and
waited. After a couple of minutes, she was starting to think that her
mind was playing tricks on her. Then, all of a sudden, eight dragon 
heads emerged from the lake, the water splashing on her skin 
convincing her that this was no trick.

Hiroshi: It's the legendary eight-headed Hiroshi!

Gary: That's NOT what it's called....

    "Why, she's off fighting that monster, of course."

    "What?!" The two boys demanded in unison. The old man wasn't
stupid enough to think that Akane could fight a monster by herself,
was he?

    "Don't look so worried," Grandpa told them while pouring himself
another cup of alcohol. "I gave her a bottle of sake so she should be
all right."

Daisuke: Yeah, at least that way she'll be drunk so she won't feel it
when the thing devours her!

Gary: Daisuke...

Hiroshi: Yeah, really! Haven't you got any sensitivity? Letting the
monster eating Akane?

Daisuke: Sorry.

Hiroshi: She's a hot babe! Let it eat Ryoga or someone like that!

Gary: *sigh*

    The three ran towards the middle of the forest. The two boys'
expression filled with worry, while the old man was too drunk to feel
much of anything.

    "Oh no, we're too late," Ranma yelled as he watched Akane beating

Hiroshi: Didn't sound like a yell.

Gary: Probably should have had an exclamation point, not a comma, after
late.

Daisuke: It's not easy to do proper punctuation,

the dragon over the head with the broom she was carrying. She was so 
intent on the fight that she failed to notice two more monsters come 

Gary: coming

    "It's too dangerous!" he yelled, ignoring the little voice in his
head which was telling him that it was just like that dream.

    "But it's to save Shinnosuke's life!"

    Ranma looked at Akane straight in the eye for a couple of
seconds, though it felt like an eternity before he made his decision.
"Let's go, then."

Gary: I like it when the characters have to make hard decisions.

                    *        *        *

    The two ran out just in time to see the slightly winded Ryoga
take another shot at one of the monster's head before him.

Gary: heads

    <I wish I could remember him...>

    The smile disappeared as a battered and pissed off dragon wrapped
its tongue around Ranma with the intent of eating him.

    The shock of seeing him in extreme danger, helpless to save
himself, brought back the flood of memories which the herbal shampoo
had denied her. "RANMA!"

Gary: That's way too quick and summary. Akane getting back her memories
is a pivotal event in the story. It needs to be dragged out more. Tell
us in detail exactly what Akane feels and experiences here.

    "Are you crazy?!" Ryoga demanded.

    Akane ignored him and kept struggling until the jacket finally
ripped open, revealing a bright blue shirt and a strangely shaped
white object.

Hiroshi: Is she naked now?

Gary: [rolls eyes] *Now* you guys wake up....

    "Shinnosuke!" Akane yelled as she ran up to his motionless form.
The days without the magic water had not been kind to him. He had lost
a lot of weight since they had last seen him and his body emitted no
warmth at all.

Hiroshi: Uh, Akane? No warmth at all? He's dead.

Daisuke: He's dead, Jim.

Gary: I hope she was exaggerating there.

    Akane quickly turned him over, grateful that the hospital gowns
opened at the back.

Daisuke: Because Shinnosuke had really nice buns.

Gary *groan*

She carefully placed some of the moss over 
Shinnosuke's body, the deep scars disappearing within seconds.

    She let out a cry of joy as his eyes started to flutter open, his
deathly color having gone along with the wounds.

Hiroshi: But since his heart had stopped five days ago, it was all for
naught.

Daisuke: Hey, he'll at least be a healthier looking corpse!

    <I've always wanted to go on a training trip by myself anyway,>

Hiroshi: But that stupid Panda keeps tagging along.

    Akane stared at his face, her bottom lip quivering before she
flung herself into his arms. Ranma, through it all, stood stiffly,
patting her back awkwardly while her hot tears turned his silk shirt a
darker shade of crimson.

    After a couple of minutes, her crying had been reduced to the
occasional sniffle, and Akane felt composed enough to speak.

Daisuke: [Akane voice] "Shinnosuke kicked the bucket! Could I marry you
instead?"

    He slowly took the blindfold off, causing Akane to gasp in wonder
as she got her first glimpse of the glittering blue jewel before her.

Hiroshi: [Akane voice] Oh, Ranma! I wanted a diamond, not a sapphire!

Gary: Do you have to take this literally?

AUTHORS NOTES: Yay! I'm finished! Hope most of you were happy with the
ending. After numerous threats from my best friend, I finally decided
to make it a Ranma ends up with Akane fic.

Hiroshi: So how come Gary still refuses to write a Hiroshi and Daisuke
end up with Shampoo and Kodachi fic?

Daisuke: Yeah, it's not like we haven't threatened him enough.

Gary: You guys aren't my best friends, though.

Now all of you who wanted 
her to end up with Shinnosuke know who to blame ^_^
I'd like to thank Scott Schimmel, my prereader for pointing out the
parts that didn't make too much sense(Writing most of the fic at two
a.m. can do that). And for all those who commented, I'm sorry if you
didn't get a response, but my inbox is currently filled and I can't
find anything there if my life depended on it :)
Please send c&c or I'll be forced to drown my sorrows by eating ice 
cream! How's that for a guilt trip ^_^

Daisuke: What is she, Skuld? And how does she expect to *get* this C&C
if her box is full? Anyway, I'd rather go to see fort knox.

Gary: That's a gilt trip. Anyway, it was a nice romantic ending to the
series. Having them openly love for each other takes out a lot of good
dramatic tension, but the series isn't going to continue anyway. I
wonder if the Tendos are ever going to figure out that they have their
daughter back, though.

Hiroshi: Well, let's see... same name, grew up in the same place where
their daughter got lost as a child... nope, not much chance.

Daisuke: That's the end of the series, we need to do something to
celebrate. I've got an idea for a skit.

[fic ends; we see Gary, dressed like Shinnosuke]

Gary (reading rather woodenly from a script): This is certainly an
interesting new neighborhood we've moved into, Akane! ... Akane? Get out
here, Akane.

[Hiroshi comes out, dressed in a gi.]

Hiroshi: Here I am!

Gary: This is your Akane costume?

Hiroshi: Yeah. You don't like it?

Gary: It's a bit... extreme.

Hiroshi: I was trying to do a Gainax version. I'll get rid of the
melons.

Gary: Anyway... This is certainly an interesting new neighborhood we've
moved into, Akane!

Hiroshi: Um... oh yeah. Yes, but the neighbors are really loud! I think
we should go over and ask them to quiet down! Knock knock!

[Daisuke comes out, wearing a spiky red wig.]

Daisuke: Hi! I'm your new neighbor. I'm the greatest super-genuis
scientist of all time, if I do say so myself!

Gary: Huh? You're way off script. What the heck are you doing?

Daisuke: This is my commemorative skit for this fic! It's a version
called "WASHURERARENAI!"

Gary: D'OH!

Hiroshi: Oh, Brother!!

Gary: Anyway, I think we better sign off. I enjoyed the series, and hope
to see more from Emily soon. Whaddaya think, your kahuna-ship?

Principal: I'm thinkin' that's a wrap, yeah! Until next time, bruddas!

Hinako: Is that really possible? What happened in the story, I mean. A
girl being lost and ending up back with her parents just by chance.

Principal: Who knows?

Hinako: Even I myself was lost as a child. I was left at the hospital
door with all of my hair shaved off.

Principal: No kiddin'? I wen' sendin' off my first daughter dat way.

Hinako: Wow, what a coincidence! I hope she turns up!


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics