(A green haired man, with all-green eyes is talking to a girl with long brown
hair, who has a combat spatula strapped to her back)

?: So anyway, I said "But then, what would you know, you're just another
   soulless little sheep in this stagnant little Crystal Tokyo joke of a 
   society. And then I killed him.

Ukyou: ...

?: That last bit was a joke, you know.

Ukyou: Oh.

?: Yes, I killed him before I made the speech. When you live as long as me,
   you learn not to stop for speeches. Anyway, enough of that. Today, 
   apparently, we're looking at Chapter 3 of Parallel Lives, a curious 
   'little' X-over. Absolutely nothing to do with Sailor Moon, so technically
   I shouldn't be the one reviewing it, but who really cares?
   
?: One important note is that I still haven't read the first chapter, so who 
   knows what embarassing little mistakes we'll make here. Today's token anime 
   person is, as you would have guessed, Kuonji Ukyou. We'll skip the boring 
   pleasantries, and go onwards:

At 05:04 PM 16/11/97 -0600, Ranma Al'Thor wrote:

Well, recent discussion helped me finally write the next chapter of this.
:)

Looks like this will go to four chapters.  

     Ranma-chan stared off into the setting sun.  Finding Akane was 
going to be a lot harder than she had thought.  Even with more 
power than she had ever had on any of her past quests to find 
Akane.  She sighed and tried to figure out how they would ever 
actually find AkaneÕs trail.  All they knew was that Akane had 
headed east with some people.  Maybe someone in the next village 
will recognize her.

?: 'would recognize her' would probably work out better with the rest
   of the tense-use in that sentence.

      Ukyou looked up from his cooking.  ÒWhatÕs wrong, Ranchan?Ó

Ukyou: Oh, I see he's using that 'pronouns based on attitude' thing that
       some people do. That stuff really gives me a headache. But why am I 
       in my 'male mode' here?

?: *cough* Because your body is.

Ukyou: WHAT!?

?: Curses, like colds, can be contagious. He explained how you got it in the 
   previous chapter. And both you and Ranma are sort of stuck in your current 
   genders, again for reasons explained previously in the story. Besides, if 
   there was ever a right curse for the right person in the Ranma series, it 
   would be you and male water.

Ukyou: What's that supposed to mean!? (Whangs him with her combat spatula)

?: Please don't do that, it's undignified. As a side point, you use a suffix 
   for Ranma's curse, but not Ukyou's. That makes it confusing, it might be 
   an idea to either tack on -kun to Ukyou, or switch to Ranko for Ranma like 
   the version of chapter 2 I've got here does.

       Ranma-chan had been the only person who came and said good-
bye when Alyssa left.  Alyssa had tried to convince her to come 
with her, but Ranma-chan couldnÕt leave until she either reached 
Accepted status or burned out or been thrown out, and Ranma-chan 

?: 'been thrown out' reads wrong. Perhaps 'was thrown out' instead? We are,
   of course, ignoring those curious little symbol problems.

Ukyou: Of course.

knew that if she wanted to find a way back home, it would almost 
certainly be in the tower.  Two weeks later, Ranma-chan had 
passed the test to become Accepted.  That had been a disturbing 
experience in itself, followed by some bad mistakes in Tear she 
made as a result of it.  I nearly got everyone killed because I was 
worried things would come out like in my test, she thought.

       Four full sisters stood around the ter'angreal--a red, a blue, a 
green, and a brown.  A fifth stood by him, another blue, Sheriam, 

?: You've been keeping pronouns correct to current gender...

Ukyou: Hmph. Just because I dressed like a boy didn't mean that I--

?: AND so you'll want to change that him to a her.

the mistress of novices.  Ranma-chan liked her, but at the same 
time, she had been ready to get out from under Sheriam's 
responsibility for a long time.  In fact, she wanted out of the tower 
as fast as possible, but the Amrylin had woven her in a net of 
reasons to not go that she wasn't even sure she fully understood.  
In fact, she'd been tugged along by things beyond her control ever 
since she'd landed in this world or time, or wherever she was this 
time.  Next time, Nabiki can go throw away the cursed objects 
herself, Ranma-chan thought.

       When the smoke cleared, they were all on the edge of a pool 

>from which an angry wombat wearing glasses was crawling.  

Everyone crawled away from the pool, then stood up.  Akane said, 
"That was close."

?: Ah, the dreaded wombat. Fierce, ferocious man-eater, capable of running
   speeds of up to 100 kms an hour.

Ukyou: That doesn't sound right.

?: Well, close enough. 

      Learning to open herself to the Source had been hellishly 
difficult.  It didn't come naturally to her, which had been 
reassuring and frustrating at the same time.  At least I didn't have 
the same problem as Nynaeve, she thought.  I bet Akane would be 
like that if she could channel.  Akane can't even do much with her 
chi, so she'd probably have an even harder time than I did.  I bet 
Ukyou could learn...not that I could teach her like this, with her a 
guy.  

?: (turns to Ukyou) I don't know, I think you'd work best with items of
   power, myself. Like Mat's fox-head amulet and spear, they'd be perfect.

Ukyou: Maybe I could find a magical Spatula of Doom or something. ^_^

      Ranma-chan stared at Ukyou's chest, which was quite flat, 
since Ukyou was currently male.  Ukyou looked down at his shirt.  
"Do I have a stain or something?"

Ukyou: Ha! He--

?: She.

Ukyou: She can't keep her eyes off me! I always knew me and Ranchan were meant 
       to be together. But no, what do I get instead in fanfics?

?: Several inventive paths to a depressing end, be it death or marriage to
   Ryouga.

Ukyou: That's right.

       Ranma-chan waited a little while for her dinner to cool.  
"What makes it extra-special?"

      "I brought some of my best sauce with me. I don't have very 
much, but I thought we'd uh...celebrate eating rabbit for the first 
time?"  Ukyou came over and sat down by Ranma-chan.

Ukyou: You go girl!

?: Guy.

Ukyou: Whatever.

?: You know, you really can be quite transparent in these little 
   romance attempts.

Ukyou: Maybe, but this is Ranchan we're talking about. He wouldn't know
       transparency if he was looking through it.

?: You've got me there.

      Ranma-chan got tired of waiting and decided to just munch 
out.  "You've never had rabbit?"  It was very good, as always, 
although she burned her tongue a little.

      "Nope.  I've had deer, and caribou once, and Dad took me to this 
weird place that served emu of all things, but never rabbit."  Ukyou 
was a little more patient, letting his food cool off.  

      "If it moves, I've had it at some point.  

?: "In fact, cars are very tasty with a red sauce..."

      "Well, I could bond you as my warder,"  Ranma-chan said.  
"Assuming I can remember how to do it.  I've seen it done, but they 
frown on anyone below the rank of Full Sister doing it."  She 
twisted the ring on her right hand without thinking about it.  "Not 
that I'm likely to have to worry about Tower rules, I guess."

?: Oh, bad idea.

Ukyou: Really?

?: Well, not really bad, no. More... unwise. Rash. Not to be taken lightly.
   Consult a doctor--

Ukyou: I get the idea.

     "What is a warder?"

     "Warders are the elite warriors who bodyguard some Aes Sedai.  
What you get from the bond is heightened strength and endurance, 
faster healing, and you can sense how I'm doing and what direction 
I'm in."  Ranma-chan thought about it.  "And I can sense you as 
well."  She frowned faintly.  "There's something else, but I can't 
remember what."

?: The man looked at the grenade. "Let's see. I pulled the pin. I think I'm
   forgetting something." He stared at the grenade, until he realised "That's
   right! I'm supposed to throw--" Boom.

     The second reason was the more important one, and the one 
that was probably giving him the insomnia in the first place.  He 
always felt guilty after they made love, and he wasn't sure why, 
though there were several possibilities.  The one he considered 
most likely was that he was making love to a girl.  He'd never found 
girls attractive before he was stranded here--well, not sexually 
attractive anyway.  He'd been able to tell if a woman was pretty, 
but he hadn't wanted women the way he did now. It wasn't just 
Alyssa.  He was starting to notice lots of women that way.  Kaneda 
wasn't as homophobic as Ranma was, but it bothered him.  Why was 
this happening?  Was it a side effect of being a boy?  What if I turn 
back into a girl and it doesn't stop?  I wonder if Ranma would start 
liking boys if he stayed a girl for too long, he wondered.  Did this 
mean it was all a result of his body?  Kaneda had never really 
thought about sexuality before...not its origins, anyway.  

?: This entire Kaneda subplot is what makes the fic really, really
   interesting, in my opinion.

Ukyou: I didn't hear you say Akane was perfect for a guy curse, and she's
       way more of a tomboy than me... Maybe you'd like to explain that (hefts
       spatula again)

?: Sometimes, you just can't win. Anyway, yes, Kaneda's development and 
   growing maturity is the true reason I like this storyline over all 
   your others, it works well and it helps that it 'nudges' the Ukyou/Ranma
   desire thing along as well.

     Ukyou could almost feel a mental pressure to do any of a 
variety of things that would probably be foolish at best.  I'm not 
going to seduce her, he thought.  Not when I'm a boy and she's a 
girl...if it was the other way around, it would be different.  We are 
engaged, so it doesn't matter if we did something...like that.  Of 
course, I'm really a girl, no matter what my body may look like 
right now, and he's a boy, so it wouldn't be so bad...no!  I won't!  

?: Oh just go for it. Gender is such a meaningless concern anyway.

Ukyou: Easy for you to say, you're not the one stuck in the wrong gender,
       lusting after your iinazuke's cursed body.

      The smell of rabbit starting to overcook snapped him out of 
his reverie, along with Ranma-chan saying, "You won't what?"

?: Rabbit for breakfast, rabbit for tea. It comes out rabbit whenever I p--

Ukyou: Hey!

?: Sorry. It's amazing the things that stick in your head over the centuries.

Ukyou: If that's an example, I don't want to know.

     They discussed several ideas with their dinner, and 
afterwards, Ranma-chan put her shirt back on, which helped Ukyou 
finally spurs his state of arousal.  Finally, they decided to go to 

?: Spurs his state of arousal?

Ukyou: (shrugs) I don't know, but it sure doesn't sound right.

sleep.  They laid out their blankets and clambered between them 
together, as had become their habit.  Ukyou fell asleep faster than 
Ranma-chan, who was still going over plans in her head.

       He was back in the tent.  The present was still there, so he 
opened it. Inside it was a letter, from someone named 'Sherin Loys 
Delerini'.  

       "If I am reading this, then it means that I have been reborn 
and reawakened to the talent I possessed in this life.  It also 
means that my skills were sufficient to create a messenger 
capable of lasting however long that might take."

?: 'Note to my future reincarnation. Don't forget to take the garbage out on
   Tuesday.' This dream sequence is certainly surreal enough to fit into the
   dreamworld of WOT.

       Ukyou stared at the letter.  This is from a past life of mine?  
No way.  Jeez, this is a crazy dream.  He read on.

     It was her own handwriting, she suddenly realized.  He dropped 

?: Another case of mixed gender pronoun usage.

it as an image flooded her mind, a fuzzy vision of a mountain.  
There was a cave within the mountain, and deep within that, was 
the cache, sitting in a stasis box.  He knew the combination.  

     It was Christmas Eve.  Kaneda was nervous and didn't know 
why.  They had set up the tree and decorated it in the 'town square'.  
Alyssa had even figured out how to make little twinkling perpetual 
lights for it.  It was beautiful in the darkness.  All the children of 
the town had put up stockings in their houses, and now, he and 
Alyssa, and Corwin, and Mai, and a few of the other adults were 
creeping around delivering presents to the houses, feeling quite 
silly in improvised Santa suits that wouldn't really fool anyone 
over age five who wasn't blind.

?: Considering the problems of being a male chaneller, if you were one of
   his followers you'd have to be starting to worry with a display like this...

Ukyou: You mean 'Uhuh. A red suit. And a fake white beard. Right, sure Mr
       Dragon, sir. Whatever you say.'

?: Yes. And that's that for this little C&C. It's lucky I'm immortal. 
   Considering how long this chapter took, I'll need the patience of the
   eternally long lived to last until the next chapter.

Ukyou: Be nice. He has a lot on his plate.

?: You only say that because he gives you lots of sex scenes with Ranma in
   his-- *CLANG*

Ukyou: (drawing spatula back for second blow) It's not that at all!

?: Oh, _I_ believe you. But enough of this. She's the guy... I mean girl 
   who always gets shafted.

Ukyou: And he's the guy who deserves to be.

?: Later, then.

************  
Mark Doherty  -  mdoherty@mailbox.uq.edu.au
My spam/fanfics are at - 
http://www.tass.org/~mdoherty/index.html

"Time grows short, but I remain tall."