Louis-Philippe Giroux wrote:
Differing Powers - OR - The Teaser I Should Never Have Written
A short Ranma 1/2 - Wheel Of Time exercise in futility
Facts, Stupid Satements and Questions With No Answers in Randland...
- Could Ryoga ever finish a game of Maiden's Kiss without bleeding himself
out (whether from the nose or from the neck)?
Nope, but just cause of the nose. If he can take that rock shrapnel
from the breaking point, a spear would probably snap on his neck.
- Would Mat try to put the moves on Onna-Ranma?
- Would Mat's luck protect him from her wrath?
Yes and his luck wouldn't protect him. No power can protect you from an
enraged anime female.
- Can Mat's fox medallion counter chi?
Sure, but then Ranma would just punch him.
- Where could Ryoga's anti-directional sense possibly lead him?
Tel'aran'rihod? Shayol Ghul? An Aiel sweat tent? Rhuidean? The Court of
the Nine Moons in Seanchan (okay, so I'd have to wing that one...)? The
Tower of Ravens? The Amyrlin's private quarters? Endless possibilities!
Everybody thinks he's using undetectable gates.
- How long 'till the Aes Sedai figure out Ranma's gender curse?
Almost immediately. They're pretty sharp.
- How many Warders could Ranma take on at once?
An army. Only about 7-10 could encircle him at once and for all their
training, they still only have human speed and strength. Considering
the kind of damage he regularly shrugs off, glancing blows aren't going
to cut it.
- What happens if you mix Ranma, cats, Aes Sedai, Asha'man, cannon
fod<AHEM> people and *no* Akane? Dumai's Well revisited!
I bet the Neko-Ken could actually shred the One Power.
- What happens when Nerimian super martial artists encounters one or more
Ta'veren(s)?
Chaos. Lots and lots of chaos.
- How many Aiel can Ranma take on at once?
See above answer for Warders.
- Should I have written this bloody thing in the first place?
Yes.
- What happens if you hit a Portal stone with a stray Hiryuu Kourin Dan?
(Assuming there *is* such a thing as a stray Hiryuu Kourin Dan in the first
place...)
You open up a permanent portal to Nerima, allowing still more
super-martial artists to go through.
- Would angreals and sa'angreals work with chi?
Not at all.
- How long until Ranma calls Min "Ucchan" by mistake?
Bring the real thing along and he won't have to.
- How would Rand react to that?
If all the fiancee squad is there, how long before Rand realizes how
much alike their romantic lives are?
- How much would Perrin (in regard to his wolf complexion) freak if he saw
Ryoga's fangs?
Ryoga's more of a wild boar...
- How does a macho *male* martial artist survive in the White Tower?
He offends a lot of Aes Sedei. (What exactly could they do to him if he
absolutely refused to cooperate?)
- Would Ranma stand in place long enough to be balefired in the first
place?
What do you think?
- Who's the strongest (and most dangerous, for that matter)? A pissed-off
Nyneave or a pissed-off Akane?
Akane. Nyneave doesn't have mallets.
- Showing a Jusenkyo curse to a Whitecloak is a Very Bad Idea.
I want to see somebody start preaching Shinto to the Whitecloaks.
- Will Kasumi ever marry Doctor Tofu?
No, he was written out. :(
- Would Lanfear leave Rand and end up as another of Ranma's fiancees?
Yes.
- How much would Rand pay for that to happen?
Lots, until he realizes he got Kodachi in exchange.
- Shouting 'Rising *Dragon* Punch' in front of Aes Sedai (particularly the
Red ones) is a Very Bad Idea.
Like they could understand Japanese.
- Will Ranma ever find out why people ran away screaming 'Aiel' the first
time he killed a Trolloc with some martial arts moves?
Will the real Aiel beg Ranma to teach them his moves? Will onna-Ranma
join the Maidens of the Spear? Will Shampoo join the Maidens?
- How long 'till the Aes Sedai figure out the difference between chi and
the One Power?
Can chi disrupt the One Power? Will a jealous Ryoga develop a bunch of
new chi tricks to compensate for Ranma being able to channel. Will
Ranma learn them? Is this going to turn into Dragonball Z and Randland
gets blown up?
- Big Damage Concept: A One Power-ed version of the Hiryuu Kourin Dan
with the super sa'angreal statue from Cairhien. (Breaking, Hiroshima,
Nagasaki, eat your heart out...)
That's a blow up the planet move.
- Who's the toughest: Ryoga or a Gholam? (Think about it...)
Ryoga, cause he don't need no stinking Dark One to empower him.
- Will the Aes Sedai ever get Ranma in a Novice dress?
Will Ranma give the Aes Sedai nervous breakdowns?
- How long would Happosai survive if he groped an Aes Sedai?
- How long would Happosai survive if he groped an Aiel Wise One?
- How long would Happosai survive if he groped the Amyrlin?
A long time. The old pervert's indestructible.
- How long could Ryoga keep his curse a secret?
Long time. Look at how long he's kept it from Akane.
- How can a piglet find hot water in Randland? (Answer in the next
sentence)
- A small, black piglet that can channel is a Very Cute, Yet Very
Dangerous Thing.
In all seriousness (little late for that) I don't think Ryoga needs to
be able to channel. In fact, I'm not sure you should have more than one
Ranma cast member able to channel. Let's face it, they're powerful
enough as is.
- How long 'till a Green Sister tries to bond Ranma or Ryoga without their
consent?
Ranma will just view her as another fiancee and treat her like dirt.
- Will the White Tower break Akane's temper or will Akane's temper break
the Tower?
Will Ryoga blow up the tower if he thinks Akane's being held against her
will?
- Why aren't I writing more Lines Of Destiny instead of this crap?
Reminds me. When you finally get around to writing the part where Ranma
has to accept the fact he was a girl in his previous incarnation <yuck>
you have to include a scene where he gets on his knees and begs Luna to
tell him he was a lesbian. :)
Side Note: I don't much like the Ranma/Akane destined love angle in
Lines of Destiny. It kind of turns me off an otherwise excellent
series. I hates destined love (except for Usagi and Mamoru).
- I could make a very serious story out of all this junk...
- I could make a very silly story out of all this junk...
It has to be a silly story. Everyone trys to do a Wheel of Time
crossover seriously and they all abandon their fics. Why? Because you
can't compete with Jordan when it comes to seriousness. You've got to
get silly. Come on, there's so much in WoT just begging to be made fun
of.
Alternate questions:
Will ranma willingly allow his male half to be gentled (if he can
channel)? Will this affect his female half?
Will the Dark One send his minions out on a quest for Hostess Twinkie
Cakes?
Will Ranma take inspiration from Rand, be a man, and marry them all!?
Will the notion of another dimension outside their Wheel of Time totally
blow the minds of the Randland inhabitants and cause them to lose faith
in their cosmological view?
Is the Dark One not evil, just misunderstood?
Could the Breaking Point shatter power-forged metal?
Come on. Write this puppy!