Tenchi Makes a Choice!
by Mark Doherty (mdoherty@mailbox.uq.edu.au)
It was one of those dinners. Doom sat next to Death, who passed the sushi
to Washu, since War, Pestilence and Famine had scooted off, citing the
"no hazard pay" clause in their contracts. Ryoko and Aeka had been placed
next to each other, perhaps in the hope that they'd kill each other before
the real trouble came. Mihoshi, on the other side of Washu, had somehow
manipulated her control cube into playing 70s disco music, and was now
desperately trying to turn the sound off. Kiyone, her free hand starting to
edge towards her blaster, was finding all her attempts to reach over and
turn off the cube thwarted by Mihoshi's flailing elbows.
Sasami and Ryo-ohki, in her psuedo-human form, sat on either side of Tenchi,
as he looked at the girls opposite him. His father and grandfather, showing
the wisdom of age, had decided to skip dinner, and the country.
Tenchi cleared his throat, cutting through the squabbling voices with the small
sound.
"I've invited you all here," he began, "to make an announcement. I've...
decided to make a commitment. A commitment of love."
Several hopes were raised.
"I knew that she had liked me, but I hadn't thought, hadn't dared to
hope that her like was anything more than one of friendship."
Several hopes were crushed, since most of the girls had made *damn* sure that
their feelings couldn't be misinterpreted as 'friendship'. Several energy
weapons were activated, too.
Kiyone started to sweat. Surely the kid wasn't going to do something stupid
like try and pick her? Sure, she liked him, but not that way. Definitely not
that way.
"Well, anyway," Tenchi muttered, as his resolve firmed, "I asked her, she
accepted, and we're going to get married, a week from now. I'd like you
all to be there if you could, to show your support."
"Who." the word, cracked and ominous, came from several lips. Death whistled
nonchalantly as he scooted off to go to the "little deadman's room". Doom,
deciding to cut his losses, tipped a nonexistant hat, and ran out the front
door.
Tenchi, smiling proudly, pointed out his bride-to-be.
Several eyes swivelled to the girl he had pointed out.
"Miya." the girl said, demurely, blushing.
Screams reverberated through the countryside.
The double funeral was held the next day.
************
Mark Doherty - mdoherty@mailbox.uq.edu.au
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"Time grows short, but I remain tall."