Sorry it took so long to get this out,
I would have done it all at once, but I had to sign off so I could
get to the movies in time to see "The Devils Advocate."
The Flashman
May The Spirit Preserve You!
___________________________
THE FFML ROYAL RUMBLE
BZZZZZZZT! "WHERE IS THE RING," someone in the cheap seats yelled.
"OVER HERE YOU MORON," Ranma-chan yelled up at Ryoga.
Ryoga looked over to where Ranma had yelled at him and he shouted in
reply, "RAAAANMAAAAAA!!!! Prepare to die! Here I come."
Now that he could see the ring, it was easy to find his way. Once
he made his way inside, he imediatly went for Ranma. "BAKSAITENKETSU,
" the lost boy cried as he jabbed his finger down towards the mat.
The ground in front of him exploded into a mist that blinded Ranma
but the mat fixed itself due to a special regenerative technology
that had been used previously in Capcoms Super Hero Fighting Games.
Ryoga was about to move in but was clubbed on the head by Shampoo,
who said, "AIYAH! Stupid Lost Boy no fight husband! Must fight
strong guys. THEN, fight husband."
"But my revenge..."
"The Amazon's right," Teknoman cut in as he tried to keep Gohan from
hitting him, "give us a hand!"
Ryoga grumbled an agreement and his depression grew as he had to put
off his revenge against Ranma for a longer period of time. This made
his aura glow around him and when it reached its peak, he raised his
hand and cried, "SHI SHI HAKODAN!"
The ki attack made Gohan slide back slightly and he gulped as he saw
Ranma-chan, Ryoga and Teknoman powering up. He braced himself, but
knew that this would probably still HURT.
"SHI SHI HAKODAN!"
"MOKO TAKIBASHIA!"
"TEKNO POWER BLASTERS!"
The united blast sent Gohan flipping backwards and as he flung
through the air, heading towards Vegita and Trunks, he thought,
"Might as well make the best of it."
As he flipped, he aimed his feet and landed a solid blow on Vegitas
face. As the prince went for Gohan, Trunks hit him with a sucker
punch to the back and that made Vegita retaliate against both of them
as the left side of the ring erupted into a triangle match between
the three Saya-jins.
As the others watched from the opposite side of the ring, Teknoman
shrugged and said, "Oh well. They can play with each other for a
while."
So saying, he leveled Shampoo with a vicious kick to the face, while
Ryoga went after Ranma-chan.
BZZZZZT! The buzzer rang out again and Teknoman turned as he heard
Moose shout, "HOW DARE YOU STRIKE MY PRECIOUS SHAMPOO," as a
surprisingly loud pop came from the audience.
The master of hidden weapons entered the ring and flung almost
everything, INCLUDING the kitchen sink, at Teknoman. Slade frowned
under his helmet, this was definatly a Bad Thing. He swung his staff
in a big circle and was able to repel the majority of the weapons,
except for a chain which tied his ankles together and sent him chin
first to the mat. As Moose pulled out two ridiculously large swords
from the depths of his robes, Teknoman thought, "He wears those thick
glasses for a reason. Let's see how he does without them."
Teknoman threw his staff and the sharp end severed the glasses right
between the lenses. Moose growled as he dropped the blades in his
hands, "How DARE you blind me!! When I find you, I'll get you!!!"
A blurry figure jumped in front of him. It had to be Teknoman,
coming to finish him off. Moose had different plans however and
flung out a spiked mace that connected solidly with his opponents
head. The enemy staggered backwards, apparently unprepared for the
vicious assault. "Your mistake Teknoman," Moose thought, "was
underestimating me just because I don't have my glasses."
Moose swung his mace again and again and was rewarded with a grunt
of pain every time he connected. Funny thing though, Teknoman had a
pretty high voice. Finally, ready to put his opponent out of its
misery, he jumped up and struck with a giant wooden shoe that he had
on his right foot. The figure hurtled back and went flying over the
ropes, hitting the ground with a dull thud. Moose suddenly felt
something brush against his arm underneath his robes and when he
inspected it, he found it to be his spare set of glasses. "Why do I
always forget about these?" he thought as he went to gloat over who
he thought was Teknoman.
As his world snapped back into focus, Mooses jaw dropped as he saw,
not Teknoman, but a knocked silly SHAMPOO. "NO," he yelled as he
jumped over the ropes and landed beside her, "What have I DOOONNNEE??
!!"
Then it hit him. "I BEAT SHAMPOO!!! I DID IT! I DID IT!
YAHOOOOOO!!!"
As he gather up the out cold Amazon in his arms, he walked back
towards the medical area, humming "Here Comes the Bride" the whole
way. Teknoman, who had freed his ankles and recovered his staff,
could only laugh at the goofy grin that was all over Mooses face as
he left.
"That's sixteen eliminated," Tybalt said, "and thirteen to go."
"Get ready," White Wolf exclaimed, "here comes another."
"3... 2... 1..." BZZZZZZZZZT!
The arena shook from the ovation that was given for Sailor Jupiter
as she ran for the ring. As Ranma-chan and Ryoga continued their
personal war and the Saya-jins were still involved with theirs,
Teknoman sprang apon the tallest Senshi as she slid under the ropes.
As Slade aimed his foot for her, Jupiter continued her roll and the
blow missed her by inches. "Nice suit," she said as she stood up,
"for your sake, I hope it's insulated! SUPREME THUNDER!!!"
The blast struck Teknoman solidly in the chest and he placed his
hands over the burn marks the lightning left as he groaned, "Shocking.
"
Jupiter could not be stopped as she raised her hands above her head
and spun as green energy bolts blasted from the space between her
palms. "JUPITER OAK EVOLUTION," she cried.
The attack hit everyone in the ring and sent Teknoman out over the
ropes. "Rats," Slade thought as he lay on his back, "Oh well. At
least I finally showed Guyver 1 who's the best."
Warhammer cried for two solid hours after the Rumble was over.
While Ranma-chan and Ryoga immediately went back to their death duel,
Vegita, leaving Trunks and Gohan to continue fighting, went over to
where Jupiter was and hissed, "I HATE being hit with a cheap shot."
"Uh oh," Jupiter thought.
Vegita rushed the green highlighted Senshi but Jupiter jumped over
him and leaped onto the top rope on the other side of the ring.
Using the rope as a spring board, Jupiter leaped off and stuck out
her foot as she cried, "SAILOR JUPITER KICK!"
As the blow connected with Vegitas jaw, Trunks looked up from his
fight and said, "I thought it was the blondes who did that."
Jupiter replied, "Why should THEY have all the fun?"
Vegita recovered and rushed at Jupiter, however, the Senshi of
Thunder leap frogged over the Saya-jin nobal. Vegita looked back at
Jupiter and so he didn't notice that he was in between both Ranma-
chan and Ryoga as they powered up their ki attacks.
"MOKO....
"SHI SHI..."
Vegita took stock of what was happening and he thought, "Why me?"
"...TAKIBASHIA!"
"...HAKODAN!"
The two ki attacks slammed into both sides of Vegita and he howled
in rage. Vegita staggered at Ranma-chan and the cursed Martial
Artist dodged the attack and cried, "HIRYU SHOTAN HAAAAAA!!!!!"
The tornado that formed sucked up Vegita and Ryoga at the same time
and the others grabbed onto the ropes to keep from being pulled in as
well. As the wind roared, Trunks felt something brush against his
legs and when he looked down, he saw the offending object was
something that had a death grip on Gohans bottom. "Please don't let
there be a full moon tonight," he thought.
As Vegita and Ryoga landed hard, Trunks fired a few ki balls to push
Ranma-chan away and helped his father to his feet. "We've got a
problem," Trunks explained.
"What problem?" Vegita asked, interested in what would make Trunks
help him when he was in such dire straights.
"A tail problem. Specifically, Gohans'. It's grown back again."
Vegita cursed as he added, "And there's a full moon tonight too."
Trunks cursed as well and said, "Let's just hope no one punches a
hole in the roof."
Ryoga got up and, roaring with rage, charged at Ranma-chan again.
"He couldn't POSSIBLY be stupid enough to give me a chance to do
another Hiryu Shotan Ha," she thought.
Ryoga blindly charged and Ranma-chan added to herself, "Oh yes he is.
"
Ryoga found himself running past Ranma and he thought as he felt a
wind rising, "Oh no. Not again."
"HIRYU SHOTAN HAAAAAAAA!!!!!"
The tornado was even more powerful then the last time and Ryoga was
once again pulled in. He went flying up to the roof and then he went
THROUGH the roof, landing in the parking lot.
Tybalt asked, "Think he'll find his way back to the arena?"
White Wolf replied, "Not unless P-chan has grown wings?"
The two adult Saya-jins looked up at the hole with a feeling of
dread but breathed sighs of relief as they saw that the sky was
overcast. Then they started hitting each other.
BZZZZZZT! The crowd chanted, "SLIME BALL! SLIME BALL! SLIME BALL,
" as Genma stalked towards the ring, a tea kettle in his right hand.
He entered through the ropes and poured the contents over the head
of Ranma-chan, turning her back to him. "You've embarased the Art
long enough boy," he snapped.
Ranma planted his foot into his fathers face and as Genma staggered
back he said, "Thanks for the water Pop, but I still won't hold back
on you!"
"Neither will I boy!"
Meanwhile, in the back...
Hikaru mentally prepared herself. It was almost her turn and that
meant it was up to her to preserve the image of the Magic Knights.
She took deep, nervous breaths and jumped when a voice behind her
said, "Excuse me. I would like to talk to you about your number in
this fight."
Hikaru whirled and was caught flat footed as a purple fire struck
her. "Specifically," the stranger growled as Hikaru fell to the
ground, unconscious, "I want it."
Back in the ring...
Jupiter found herself facing one of the DREAMIEST guys she had ever
faced. "You know," she remarked, "you look JUST like my old
boyfriend."
Trunks raised an eyebrow and replied, "Really?"
"Uh huh," Jupiter said in a husky voice, her right hand sliding up
her hip, "and do you know what I decided to do if I ever saw him
again?"
Trunks gulped, "No."
Lightning suddenly raged around Jupiter as she roared, "I SWORE I'D
BLOW HIS SCRAWNY LITTLE BUTT OFF! SUPREME THUNDER!!!"
Trunks barely managed to dodge the lightning as he muttered, "'A
woman scorned' indeed."
Gohan meanwhile, was a little busy dodging the attacks of his
fathers most constant rival. Vegita unleashed ki ball after ki ball,
with Gohan dodging all of them and sporadically answering them with
some of his own. Gohan dodged another with an impressive spin and
then unleashed a ki ball that struck Vegita in the chest.
The older Saya-jin staggered back and bumped into the rapidly
dodging Trunks. "This is a bit harder then I thought," Trunks
grumbled.
Vegita grinned as he replied, "And I wouldn't have it any other way.
"
Jupiter fired another Supreme Thunder and the two Saya-jins jumped
over it. The energy flew forwards and struck Ranma hard. The young
martial artist fell to the ground, twitching from the electrical
force that had zapped him. Genma scolded, "Always be aware of your
surroundings boy!"
The next thing the elder Saotome knew, Jupiter was in front of him,
scowling. "My opponent seems to be busy with other things," she said,
"I guess you're free."
Genma replied, "Don't be fooled. I'm not some helpless old man who
you can easily get rid of."
The green highlighted Senshi shot back with, "We'll see."
Ranma slowly stood to his feet and as his vision cleared, he noticed
that Vegita and Trunks had teamed up against the little boy. "Maybe
I can even the odds," he thought.
Vegita and Trunks had come to a mutual agreement, get rid of Gohan
before the sky cleared. Of course, Gohan was determined to stay in,
so that he could fight against his father and show how good he had
become, so getting him to leave was proving to be a problem. It got
even tougher as Ranma struck the rapidly tiring Vegita with a strong
sucker kick to the back of the head. Trunks tried to punch Ranma but
the boy ducked and hit Trunks with the Amaguri Ken 716 times.
Ranmas' fist still stung from the attack, but he noticed that it
wasn't as severe as before. "They must be getting tired too," he
thought.
BZZZZZZT! The buzzer sounded again and Pluto received some modest
applause as she made her way to the ring. Jupiter smiled as she
looked up from the quivering form of a badly beaten Genma and she
said, "Nice to see another Senshi in here."
"My apologies," Pluto replied as she stepped into the ring, then
jumped over the ropes to the floor, "but it is not in history for me
to take part in this battle."
The audience performed the largest mass facefault in the long and
glorious history of mass facefaults.
Jupiter stood, her left eye twitching as her jaw hung open, the
shock of the events that had just transpired overwhelming her. Out
of the corner of her eye, she saw Genma trying to sneak away and she
turned to face him. "Oh no you don't," she said, "just where do you
think YOU'RE going?"
Genma whispered, "Mommy."
Tybalt shook his head, "This has been a bad night for Magical Girls.
"
"I know," White Wolf replied, "with the exception of Sailor Jupiter,
no magical girl has lasted beyond four minutes and only two of them
have yet to enter."
Tybalt received a message over his headphones and frowned as he
added, "Better make that one. Some thing's just happened to Hikaru
and she isn't in any shape to fight. No word on a replacement though.
"
The fight continued and no one was eliminated as the timer expired
once more.
BZZZZZZZT! Vegita and Trunks looked up in horror as the full moon
suddenly bloomed in full glory. "Trunks!" Vegita exclaimed, "We have
to destroy the moon... NOW!"
"Right," the Saya-jin halfling replied.
However, as they aimed their arms upwards, a red streak stuck both
of them and they gripped their arms. Looking down at what hit them,
they both exclaimed similtaniously, "A ROSE?!?!"
Jupiter looked up and cried, "Tuxedo Kamen!"
Siloueted against the moon, his cape flapping in the night breeze,
Tuxedo Kamen said, "The Moon is a beacon in the night. To lose its
light would be a grave injustice."
"Yeash," Ranma thought as he rolled his eyes, "and I thought KUNO
was corny."
The speech had been meant more to draw attention then to impress and
in that regard, it had succeeded. Unfortunately, it had also drawn
the attention of Gohan and the small Saya-jin halflings thoughts
turned to mush as the full moonlight bathed him in its glow.
Sweating like mad, the two older Saya-jins looked down as Gohan
began to change. First it was the eyes. Gohans peepers became red,
blank orbs. Then, his face started to become more ape like and his
body was covered with thick brown fur. His body expanded until he
almost reached the ceiling, tearing his clothes to shreds. Gohan-
kaiju let out an earth shattering roar and all the participants
turned to look at the fearsome monster which stood in their midsts.
Flashman, meanwhile, panicked and pulled out a remote control
labeled "IN CASE GOHAN TRANSFORMS" and hit the large red button on it.
Blast shields covered all the people. Fortunately for them, eye
holes had been installed, so they could continue watching the match
in safety.
Tuxedo Kamen landed in between Sailor Jupiter and Ranma and he was
unprepared as Vegita ran at him and yelled, "You IDIOT! You just HAD
to make a flashy entrance didn't you! Now look at what you've
done!"
"Yelling will get us no where," Tux shot back, "we must pool our
resources if we want to beat this situation. Destroying the moon is
NOT an option as this world will be destroyed without it in the
future."
Vegita frowned as he nodded in acceptance and he said, "Very well.
If all of you," he made a sweeping gesture with his arm to encompass
all the remaining fighters, "can get his attention, I'll be able to
cut off his tail and our problem will be solved."
"That's good," Tuxedo Kamen replied.
"Um... guys," Ranma said as he looked at a point above and behind
Vegita and Tuxedo Kamen.
"What?" the two of them asked.
"He's glaring at us," Ranma replied as he pointed.
They turned and then scattered, along with everyone else, as Gohan-
kaiju stomped his foot down. Fortunately, everyone had made it out
of the way in time and went on the attack.
"MOKO TAKIBASHIA!"
"SPARKLING WIDE PRESSURE!"
"FINAL FLASH!"
Tuxedo Kamen threw a storm of roses as Trunks fired an acompaning
storm of ki balls. The united blast knocked Gohan-kaiju back several
steps and he roared in response. As the others continued to attack,
Vegita moved in towards the monsters tail but was intercepted and
clobbered, by the very object he had been attempting to remove.
Vegita fell to the mat and rolled out of the way at the last second
as Gohan-kaiju tried to plant him with his foot. The monster that
Gohan had been turned into went nuts, as he fired beams of pure ki
out of his mouth and began to blast away at the structure of the
building. Holes the size of trucks appeared in the walls, and
outside, people watched as the beams of light shot into the night sky.
Inside, the heroes were sprawled out on the mat, several of the
blasts striking in their direction and their concussion waves
knocking them senseless. "This... thing... is... strong," Jupiter
gasped.
"We've... got to... stop it," Trunks rasped as he tried to get to
his feet.
BZZZZZT! All heads that were capable of it, turned towards the
curtain to see who was next.
"Ho mighty warriors," Kuno said, "fear not. For though the Blue
Thunder has drawn such a late number that my glorious battle skills
have not yet been seen, I shall display my powers for thee, my
adoring public and smite this unholy monster."
"Is this guy SERIOUS?!" Vegita griped as he used the ropes to pull
himself to his feet.
"Afraid so," Ranma replied as he did the same.
Kuno stepped through the ropes. He raised his bokken and aimed it
at the mighty monster before him. "Beast of Darkness..." he
whispered before shouting his famous battle cry of, "I SHALL SMITE
THEE!!!"
Kuno leaped high in the air, his bokken aimed straight and true,
victory certain...
Gohan-kaiju backhanded him away. Far away.
Kuno went flying over the ropes, over the fans, over the balcony and
crashed into the wall, leaving a Kuno shaped impression as he slid
down. "I..." he groaned, "shall... return... to... smite.... thee...
later."
Gohan-kaiju's attention had only been diverted by Kuno for a second.
Fortunately, for Trunks, it had been enough. Flying in the air
Trunks aimed for Gohan-kaiju's tail and unleashed a ki blast strong
enough to cut it off.
The monster Gohan had time to let out one last scream before it
changed back into the peacefully sleeping form of Gohan. The
warriors gathered around the child and Ranma said, "Well, that's that,
" before kicking Vegita in the face.
Vegita snarled and punched Ranma in the stomach. Trunks gathered up
Gohan in his arms and turned to Tuxedo Kamen as he asked, "Mind if I
borrow your cape?"
Tuxedo Kamen took his cape off and handed it to the time traveler.
Trunks wrapped the snoring child in the cape and called over to
Warhammer, "HEY REF!"
Warhammer walked over, his shoulders shaking with sobs. "What
(sniff) do you want?"
"Mind taking Gohan for me? A fight is no place to sleep in."
"Whatever. I don't care. (Sniff) TEKNOMAN GOT ELIMINATED!
BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
Seeing the armor wearing warrior cry made Trunks shudder and he
yelled, "JUST TAKE THE KID WOULD YOU!!!!!"
Trunks handed Gohan, over the top rope, to the bawling Warhammer.
Warhammer then walked to the back area, to drop off the child in the
Mens locker room. Flashman meanwhile, lowered the blast shields, so
the crowd could cheer and be heard again.
"Now," Trunks said as he turned back to Sailor Jupiter and Tuxedo
Kamen, "where were we?"
Across the ring, Vegitas thoughts were those of a Saya-jin who was
rapidly reaching the end of his rope, both physically and mentally.
"If I was at full strength," he thought as Ranma bounced around him,
landing several good shots in the process, "I'd crush him like an
insect. But in this condition..."
Ranma suddenly stopped his assault and he looked around the ring.
That Sailor lady and the guy in the tuxedo were fighting that other
Saya-jin. The one he was fighting was getting to his feet, and
looking REALLY POed. His father....
"Where IS Pop," Ranma thought, "I haven't seen him since that kid
transformed."
Then he had no more time to wonder, as Vegita growled and their
battle began once more.
Trunks dodged the Supreme Thunder and the rose thrown at him but he
didn't dodge the Sparkling Wide Pressure ball that Jupiter had
followed up her attack with. Trunks convulsed from the electric
current that raced through him and was hit square in the face by the
extending pole of Tuxedo Kamen.
He shook out his head and returned fire with twenty light ki balls
that the Sailor and her friends protector super jumped over. However,
Trunks rushed up into the air and caught both of them with strong
punches to the gut, making them fall to the mat.
BZZZZZT! The people waited in anticipation of who would come next.
Nothing happened.
The people waited some more.
Still nothing.
Finally, a camera man moved closer to the curtain and the sound of
arguing voices was heard by those watching at home.
"...pid idea was this anyway?!"
"It's too late to turn back now!"
"Please... do this for us."
"I don't wannaaaaaaAAAA!!!!"
"GET GOING!!!!!"
Two sets of hands, and two sets of paws, pushed a figure, covered in
shadow, out into the arena, where he... no, she, for the figure was
definatly female, landed on her butt. The spotlight was finally
focused on her....
...and the crowd went absolutely crazy.
Sailor Moon gulped. The butterflies in her stomach crashed around
as if they were moving at Warp Factor 12 and the fact that she had
drawn such a late number, did nothing to ease her nervousness.
Although, the reaction of the crowd when she had been spotted DID
help and, taking a deep breath and muttering, "Here goes nothing,"
she made her way towards the ring.
As she did so, chaos erupted. A man in a trench coat jumped over
the railing by ringside and grabbed Trunks from behind. Trunks heard
the person say, "Now we're even," before the person poured a bottle
of water over himself and shredded his coat, as he transformed into
Tarou-minatour.
With the strength boost, Tarou was able to force Trunks over with
him and they spilled onto the floor. Trunks, enraged that he had
been eliminated in such an underhanded fashion, went right for Tarou
and the two brawled down the isle, right towards Sailor Moon.
The Senshi of the Moon didn't have the time to move as Tarou and
Trunks barreled down on her. Tuxedo Kamen was about to leap over the
ropes and help her but he stopped as he saw someone else do his job
for him.
A pink streak suddenly crashed down in between the Saya-jin and the
monster and a tremendous explosion was thrown up. The explosion
knocked Trunks and Tarou back far enough so that Sailor Moon was able
to leap over them as they continued their brawl to the locker rooms.
Sailor Moon looked down at her savior and remarked, "Has anyone ever
told you that your landings stink Uncle Dan?"
"Uncle..." one spectator started.
"...DAN?!?!?!?!!?!?!" another finished.
"Figures," a third added.
Dan looked up at his niece and as he rose to his feet, he replied,
"Yeah. Among other things... although, they usually use harsher
words.
"Thanks for your help," Sailor Moon said.
"I owed you for the save earlier," Dan replied as he gave her the
Thumbs Up, "now get in there and kick some keister."
Warhammer, still fighting back tears, returned at this point and
slapped his hammer in his right palm as he cleared his throat. Dan
took the hint and made a hasty exit.
Sailor Moon smiled and was about to enter the ring, when she saw a
flash of moving white from under the apron. Her curiosity overtaking
her, Sailor Moon crawled under after it.
In the back....
"What the HELL is that stupid Dumpling Head DOING?!" Mars growled as
she watched the events over a small monitor.
"You know," Teknoman replied as he watched the match with her, "now
that I think about it. We haven't seen that Genma character in a
while."
"You don't think..."
"Maybe."
Back at the ring...
To every ones delight, Sailor Moon crawled out from under the ring,
with the left leg of Genma in her grip. "But I don't wannaaaaaAAAAA,
" Genma whined.
"That one's been taken," Sailor Moon chided.
With that, Warhammer helped Sailor Moon pick up Genma by the waist
and roughly push him back into the ring. Genma stumbled forward and
ran right into Ranma. "Hi Pop," Ranma said as he cracked his
knuckles.
Ranma unloaded with a supreme right cross that sent Genma back out
of the ring and out through the hole in the ceiling, before he said,
"Bye Pop."
By this time Sailor Moon had entered the ring... and imediatly
regretted it.
Sailor Jupiter stood before her, in a battle stance. "So," she said,
"we have to fight."
Sailor Moon sweated as she said said quickly, "W-w-wait a second!
We don't have to fight yet! Let's team up first and then worry about
each other later!"
Tuxedo Kamen stepped between them and said, "Sailor Moon is right.
For now, we should combine our resources."
Then he smiled at the two girls and added, "However, when the time
comes, I shall be the winner."
Ranma and Vegita continued their duel, trading punches and kicks as
fast as they could, for Vegita however, it was much slower then usual.
Added to the fact that Ranma was much fresher then him made the
situation worse. Vegita then sensed the beginnings of a persecution
complex as the two Senshi and their male friend moved in to attack
him as well.
Vegita roared and flared his aura around him. The others were blown
back and Vegita snarled between pants, "Come (huff) on! I'll (puff)
take (huff) all (puff) of the (huff) (puff) sorry (huff) lot of
(puff) you!"
The others were about to take Vegita up on his offer when....
BZZZZZZZT!