Well, as the ring repairs itself, lets see how well, "Reporter Boy", 
aka Zen can hold interviews with Animates.

The Flashman

May The Spirit Preserve You!
___________________

			   THE FFML ROYAL RUMBLE:
			      THE INTERVIEWS

(Zen is standing in the back area of the arena.  Behind him is a blue 
backdrop with the words "FFML ROYAL RUMBLE" in gold letters.  Zen is 
holding a microphone and he looks nervously to his right as he waits 
for his first guest.)

Zen: This is Zen, here to give you close up and personal interviews 
with some of the participants in tonights Royal Rumble match up.  
Zens first guests makes Zen glad that Zen only turns into a girl in  
"Revenges End."  Here they are; Happosai, Ataru and Kentaro.  Also 
known as POA, the Perverts Of  the Appocolips.

(There is a sudden squeal of tires as three Harley Davidsons roar 
into the picture.  Riding them are the three Animates Zen mentioned 
earlier and he grows more nervous as the bikes circle him.)

Happosai: Perverts!  Halt!

(The bikes stop and they disembark.)

Zen: Welcome.  Zen is...

Ataru: Do you really turn into a (starts to drool) full breasted girl 
when hit with cold water?

Zen:(Visibly miffed) No.  That is only a character Zen plays in a 
fanfic.

Kentaro:(Confused) I thought he asked if YOU did it?

Zen:(Sighs) You don't understand, Zen was referring to Zen, when Zen 
said that Zen only turns into a girl when Zen is hit with cold water 
in a fanfic called "Revenges End."  Do you understand what Zen is 
talking about?

(Kentaro blinks in confusion and opens his mouth to ask again [and 
start a long pointless debate] but Happosai lands on his head, 
effectively shutting the Golden Boy up.)

Happosai: Sorry about that.  As you can see, my young deciples still 
need to learn the more subtle art of pervertism.

Zen: Yes, (Cough) Zen sees.  Well, may Zen ask you Happosai, since 
you are the only member of POA in the Rumble, what are your plans for 
this special occasion?

Happosai:(Chuckles) I plan to stay there to the end.  Not to win but 
to see all those beautiful ladies in those skimpy outfits and steal 
their underwear! (His eyes turn to hearts)  ESPECIALLY those Sailor 
girls!

Ataru:(Drooling) Those short skirts....

Kentaro:(Also drooling) Those tight shirts....

Happosai: WHOOO BABY!  Let's go Perverts!

(The POA mount up on their Harleys and roar off.)

[Next]

(Zen is standing next to Vegita in front of the same backdrop where 
he had been previously.  Vegita is wearing a black t-shirt that reads,
 "VEGITA 3:16" in gold letters on the chest.  Zen is about to say 
something but Vegita pulls the microphone towards him.)

Vegita: Let me ask you something.  Do you like your life?

Zen: Yes.  Zen is quite happy with his life.

Vegita: Well, if you want to keep it, GIVE ME THE DAMN MIC AND GET 
THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

Zen:(Gulps) Yes Mr. Vegita, Sir.

(Vegita lightly pushes Zen away.  Unfortunately for Zen, Vegitas 
definition of "light" is enough to send Zen into a table three feet 
away.)

Vegita:(Now looking at the camera as he clutches the mic) You humans 
aren't the most powerful species in the galaxy... that honor belongs 
to MY race.  You aren't the smartest either... that's what a Namek is 
for.  However, (Smiles evilly) you may be the most creative.

(Vegita comes closer to the camera.)

Vegita: Imagine the concept, if you can.  Thirty of the most powerful 
warriors from dozens of different realities, all brought together to 
fight for the right to be called, "The Multiverse's Strongest."  With 
all those bodies and all those different power levels, it's not going 
to come down to has the most muscle, or the most speed, or agility, 
or skill.  It's going to come down to who wants it more... and who's 
more willing to kick everybody else's A**. (Smiles even more evilly) 
To me, that sounds just like ME.

(Zen staggers back into the scene as Vegita walks off.)

Zen:(Groggily) Hey!  You forgot to give Zen back Zens...

(The microphone comes flying at Zen and smacks him in the gut.)

Zen:(The breath knocked out of him) T.. thanks... (falls over)

[Next]

(Zen is now with Guyver 1.)

Zen: Greetings Guyver 1.  Zen would like to ask you what you think 
your chances are in this special match up.

Guyver: I'd say they are VERY good.  ESPECIALLY since that cheap rip 
off of me, Teknoman, isn't here.  He'd probably try to cheat and make 
sure I couldn't win.  However, he's not here and I am going to WIN!

(Teknoman walks into the picture.)

Zen: Well, this is a surprise, Zen welcomes you Tekno...

Teknoman:(Points a finger at Guyver 1's face) You'd just better watch 
your back.  You see, I've been let in as an alternate.

(Guyver gives the impression that he's sweating under his helmet.)

Guyver:(Gulps) M..maybe... but that means you can only be let in if...


Teknoman:(Raises his staff) Someone is out.... and I hear that Ririka 
has the flu.

(Teknoman saunters off and Guyver gulps again.)

Zen: Well Guyver 1, (Grins) it seems to Zen that you may have a bit 
of a problem on your hands.

Guyver: Shut up. (Walks off)

[Next]

(Zen is now with Kuno.)

Zen: With Zen now is the master kendoist, Tatiwaki Kuno.

Kuno: That is Upper Class Man Tatiwaki Kuno, Leader of the Kendo Club,
 the man behind Kunomainia and the BLUE THUNDER OF FURIKAN HIGH!

(Thunder booms from out of nowhere.)

Zen:(Still digesting something from earlier) Kuno... MANIA???

Kuno: Yes.  The prayers, the vitamins and the 24 inch bokken shall 
prevail over all that stands in my way... and my victory in this 
glorious contest shall allow me to win the heart of the fair Akane 
Tendo.

Zen: That's nice, but what about the Pig Tailed Girl?

Kuno:(Confusion clouds his face) I did not consider... my victory 
could win her heart as well... but Akane... Pig Tailed Girl... I can 
not choose.  I WOULD HAVE THEM BOTH!!!

Zen: Yeah.  Right.  Very well, Zen wishes you luck. (Rolls his eyes 
as Kuno leaves.)

[Next]

(Zen is surrounded by the Magic Knights.)

Zen: Zen is now with Umi, Fuu and Hikaru; also known as the Magic 
Knight Rayearth.  Zen is happy to be here with you.  What are your 
feelings on the Royal Rumble?

Umi:(Before anyone else can answer) I just want to say that our main 
reason for being here is to show those stupid Sailor Senshi that 
WE'RE the best Magical Girls out there!

Hikaru: Umi, be nice.  Well, I just want to say that this sounds like 
a lot of fun and I hope we all have a good time tonight.

(Everyone looks at Hikaru strangely and sweatdrops form on the back 
of their necks.)

Fuu: Hikaru... do you even KNOW what a Royal Rumble is?

Hikaru: No... but if we get to meet Royalty it's going to be great.

Zen:(sarcastically) Oh there is definatly going to be Royalty in 
there.  In fact, Zen talk to one of them earlier tonight.

Hikaru: REALLY?!  What was he or she like?

Zen:(Long pause) Pushy.

[Next]

(Zen is waiting for his guest to show up.  He taps his foot 
impatiently, sighs, coughs, sneezes, taps his foot some more, sighs 
again and finally turns back to the camera.)

Zen: Well, it looks like Zen WON'T be interviewing Ryoga after all.

[Next]

(Zen is now with Goku.)

Zen: Zen is now standing with what many consider the man to beat in 
this contest.  Son Goku, how do you feel about this special fight?

Goku: Well, a lot of powerful fighters are going to be here and I 
hope that I get the chance to take on every one of them.

Zen:(Laughs) That'll only happen if you draw number one or two.

Goku:(Frowns and holds up a small piece of paper) Rats, and look at 
the number I have.

(Zen looks at the paper and his eyes bug out.)

[Next]

(Zen is talking to someone off camera.)

Zen: Come on now, it's not THAT bad looking.

Voice: Yes it is!  I look STUPID!

Zen: Oh come on now, (Smiles) Zen thinks it's cute.

Voice: Well ZEN is not the one WEARING it!

Zen:(Lecherous grin) Zen remembers hearing Flash-san saying something 
about an extra bonus if you come on camera wearing that.

Voice:(Interested) What "bonus"?

Zen: An all expenses paid trip for two to Cancun, Mexico... and he 
got your main squeeze to agree to it. (Grins even more lecherously.)

Voice:(Very interested now) Really?  He can afford to do that?

Zen: From what Zen understands, the profit from this event is MORE 
then enough, and we all KNOW that Flash-san likes you enough to do 
that for you.  So Zen suggests that you humor him.

Voice:(Sighs) Okay.  Here I come.  Just don't laugh TOO hard.

(Into the shot walks Sailor Moon... with an Ultimate Warrior face 
painting.  The camera starts to shake violently and there is the 
sound of laughter.  It takes a second for it to sink in that the 
camera man [as  well as most of the rest of the technical crew] is 
laughing his head off.)

Moon:(Visibly embarased) Come on now.  Stop that! (Blushes a 
humiliated red as the laughter continues.)

Zen:(casually) Did you know that the Moon Kingdom and the Saya-jin 
Royalty have had a long standing alliance?

(The silence that follows is deafening.)

Moon:(Smiles at Zen) Thank you.

Zen: You're welcome.  Now tell Zen, this doesn't seem the kind of 
thing you would sign up for.  Why are you here?

Moon: Well, I just want to say, this was all LUNAS' idea.  SHE said 
that, (imitating Luna) "it will help you with your battle skills and 
help you protect the world from future enemies."

Luna:(From below the shot) Well, it WILL.

Moon:(Looks down at Luna) Have you SEEN what some of these guys can 
DO?!  What if one of us gets seriously hurt?!  What kind of training 
would THAT be?!

Luna:(Long pause) I hadn't thought of that.

Moon: SHESH!  And people call ME "Dumpling Head"!

Zen: Be that as it may, Sailor Moon, Zen has heard that there is 
another reason you are here.

Moon: Yeah.  I'm visiting family.

Zen: Who?

Moon: He asked me not to tell.  He said it wouldn't be best if we 
were associated with each other.

Zen: Ah, Zen understands, he wants nothing to do with you.

Moon: HEY!

Zen: Sorry.

Moon: To tell the truth, Mom and Dad are kind of embarased that we're 
related to him.

[Next]

(Zen is standing around when Ranma runs into the picture, screaming.
)

Zen:(Surprised) Ranma?  Wh...

Ranma:(Frantically as he grabs Zen by the collar) YOU GOTTA HIDE ME!

Zen:(Choking) Why?  And please let go, you're choking Zen.

(Ranma lets go.)

Ranma: I was talking to three of those Sailor Senshi ladies when the 
tall one ruffled my hair and said I looked like her old boyfriend. Of 
course, Akane walked in just to see the hair ruffling and hear "old 
boyfriend."

Zen:(Grins) So Akane now has a mallet with your name on it.

(Ranma nods furiously.)

Zen: Zen can help.  There's a trash can over there that's big enough 
to hide you in and while you're in there, Zen'll redirect Akane.

Ranma: Are you NUTS?!  I'm NOT gonna jump in a stinkin' GARBAGE 
CAN!!!

Zen: Think, garbage... or mallet.

(Ranma dives into the can as Akane storms on, a size 98 mallet in her 
clutches.)

Akane: WHERE IS THAT NO GOOD PERVERTED IDIOT?!!!!

Zen: Zen thinks he said something about going to the garbage dump.

(Akane storms off to the right.  A thirty second pause ensues and 
then Ranma hesitantly looks out.)

Ranma: Is she gone?

Zen: Yes.

Ranma:(Gets out of the garbage can and walks off) Thanks man.  I owe 
you.

Zen:(As Ranma leaves) Just remember that there's an okinomiyaki chef 
out there waiting for you and Zen will consider it even. (Turns back 
to the camera)  Oh well, that's all the time we have, back to the 
ring for some more action.

NEXT: THE FFML ROYAL RUMBLE