Its dark in here.

Actually its always dark in here, I prefer to keep my shades
drawn.  Which mind you doesnt always help because I work odd
hours and so I get to sleep to noon.

I like to remember things, and then there are certain things I
dont like to remember.  But we'll forget about those won't we?
Sure.

Work is easy and not very time consuming.  I get to listen to
music sometimes and so I slowly take the music and set it to a
movie, a particular scene.  Music used to inspire me a lot more
before ... well, lets just not go there.  Everyone makes
mistakes, right?

But I create these images in my head of how a certain event takes
place with the music.  What's a movie without background music?
I mean really thats what I wanted to do when I graduated from
college.  But I got a job as a buyer instead.  Woopsie.

I read over my collected stories and fascinate over my own
creation; Sarah Leahy, who started out as a minor character and
yet grew into something more.  I figure she's an extension of
myself and I kinda like here like that.

I like to fix them up, make them look a little bitter.  I write
for cathartic reasons.  To heal, to make me laugh, for whatever
reason.  My first story in ages was an attempt to bridge a gap.
That is what I wont think about.  Its better not to.

But why Ranma and his crew?  Because they all have their stories
and their emotions, because some of them make me ache and because
they make me laugh.  Ranma reflect my joys and sadness.  I
sympathize with Ukyou and rail against unfairness with Ryouga.  I
stammer my way through my feelings with Ranma and unleash my mad
desires with Kodachi. And they all have stories waiting to be
imagined.  All i need is to find the right music to set it too.
Is it The Ballad of Romeo and Juliet?  Maybe its Springsteen's
Thunder Road or better yet Metallica's Enter Sandman.

Not all my stories have to center around Ranma, there are stories
of Heaven and Hell and a fight the battle to end all battles,
theres Sarah's stories and there's even my own story.  I hope to
write all those one day, but for today I'll stick with Ranma.

Work might be less enjoyable if i didnt have these movies in my
head that scream for me to write them down in some manner or
another.

Like I said, writing is cathartic for me.  A search for whatever
answers I currently need desperately to find again.  I think
about my story Insignificant and realize that that yeah it was
autobiographical.  Maybe I started it being a story about HER,
but it turned into something more, it turned into a story about
me. I needed to find my answer through it, and while I can't
really follow the path a laid before Ukyou I can sure as hell
try.

Its fun to write, its good to feel like I have little characters
like Sarah and Cubicle and Dim to hang around with.  At least
till i forget Amber.  At least that long.

Woops, the whole day has gone by already and its time to go home
and type away on my computer.  Amazing how time can fly when you
are having fun.

--
What power would Hell have if those here
imprisoned were not able to dream of Heaven?
--Morpheus
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