Eric: HI ho..
Sarah: excuse me? *glows green*
Eric: uhhh hi there?
Sarah: i thought so.
Eric: well here we are at TPOH pt 1 the first part leaving us
totally hungry for more.
Sasrah: ayuh.
Eric: but this one seems shorter so we'll do a review of it...
Sarah: on with the show.
Eric: you seem curt today.
Sarah: i can have a bad day too you know.
Eric: great your bad days usually end up with something being
destroyed.
Sarah: *glows green* you take that back.
-----Original Message-----
From: RPM - acct 3/5 <rpm39788@Bayou.UH.EDU>
To: fanfic list <fanfic@fanfic.com>
Date: Tuesday, October 07, 1997 10:37 PM
Subject: [FFML] [ROUGHDRAFT] The Pursuit of Happiness Act2Pt1
this... isn't quite finished yet. I don't know how
to end the chapter, really. If you have any suggestions,
feel free.
Sarah: heheh... ideas are forming already.
Eric: you dont even know the ending yet... *shrug*
-rodM
p.s. I'm really beginning to hate fight scenes. x.x
Eric: an understandable complaint... but you are embarking on a
tournament.
Sarah: i hope the fights dont get less and less indepth as the
tourney progresses because you get tired of writing them. Maybe
you should write the end ones first.
========================
THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS
ACT 2
The Kings of Nerima
Day 1
Minor Arcana
========================
Eric: woo woo...
Sarah: Hand me the popcorn!
Eric: what did the baby corn say to the mother corn?
Sarah: ummm do i wanna know?
Eric: where's pop corn.
Sarah: ...
---------ROUND ONE---------
Eric: woo woo... goooo Ukyou...
Sarah: gooooo Ryouga!
"Be careful, Sentaro!" cried Miss Satsuki, holding Sentaro in
a
desperate embrace.
Sentaro returned his beloved's embrace, his face solemn and
grim.
"Do not fear, my love. I will have my vengence on this day. In
the
name of the Daimonji School of Tea Ceremony Martial Arts, I
CANNOT
fail."
Sarah: you get the feeling he's doomed already?
Reluctantly, he and Satsuki seperated from each other, and he
strode (actually, glided on his knees as those who practice Tea
Ceremony Martial Arts were apt to do) into the battlefield, the
football field of Furinkan High. The small crowd watching
included
many of his fellow students, and those of the Miyako School of
Tea
Ceremony Martial Arts as well.
Eric: here is one manga i missed.
Sarah: tea ceremony martial arts? sounds unexciting i give him 5
seconds.
"DO YOUR BEST!" yelled his grandmother.
"I WILL NOT FAIL!" he yelled back.
Eric: doomed.
Then Sentaro Daimonji mentally prepared himself, eyeing his
most
hateful enemy. The one that defeated the entire Tea Ceremony
Eric: he's facing off against Ranma?
Martial
Arts dojo one fateful night a year ago. He that brought shame
to them
all.
"TODAY, I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!" he yelled to his nemesis.
Sarah: dead meat.
Ryo Muhoshin idly twirled his umbrella, looked Sentaro over
once,
and said a single word.
Sarah: I like him. though he tends to be a bit scary looking did
you see that drawing of him on rPm's webpage.. the guy looks
possessed.
"Five."
Sarah: HA! I guessed it! Gooooooooooooo Ryo!
Eric: You really like him dont you.
Sarah: mmm hmmm.
*
Focus.
Sarah: *closes her eyes and falls into a trance*
Ryouga repeated that simple mantra to himself as he prepared
for
the upcoming fight. The scene of the fight was a stretch of
land by
the canal, a place he knew Ranma frequented for practice.
Eric: with nice handy water near by.
Strategically, this was good and bad. Had he been the 'feature
match'
of the day (the feature match today being some people he didn't
know... apparently the champion of last year's match versus some
Eric: damn it might be interesting to see whose fighting
Sarah: do you get the feeling the author either a> doesnt think
its important to mention or b> doesnt know himself?
promising and new martial artist), he'd be fighting in the
auditorium,
and he MUCH preferred open-air matches. Of course, the canal
nearby
was a water hazzard, but he felt he shouldn't worry about that
too
much or else he might be overly distracted during the match.
Eric: and it can be used as a suprise tactic.
Sarah: do you think he's practiced as much with his female side?
A medium sized stand was errected nearby for viewers who
bought
tickets to this match. He could see a great many students from
Furinkan (the girls circling around talking to everyone being
Nabiki's
Agents, he suspected) watching the match amongst the spectators
and to
his surprise some carrying banners cheering him on.
Eric: this is good we get a good feeling of how the atmosphere
is.
Sarah: the suspense is built up good as well, but can the author
hold it?
He wished Ukyou was there, but she had a match of her own to
fight.
Eric: awwww cute little Ukyou.
With a bit of a sigh, he looked at his umbrella, currently
Eric: a bit of a sigh? *ponder* is htat like a halfway sigh?
plastered by various logos from companies (YOKOHAMA TIRES //
SONY //
CAPCOM // SHONEN KNIFE ) and local merchants (UCCHAN'S
OKONOMIYAKI //
KING'S CAFE // TERRI'S TERIYAKI & STEAK ). He never thought
Sarah: mmm Terri's Teriyaki & Steak, its making me hungry just
thinking about it.
promotional money could be earned from martial arts... but then
again,
this was a new day and age.
Eric: Ryouga has seen movies hasnt he?
Sarah: i think i remember them going to Jackie Chan marathons.
His opponent for this first round looked serious. He was a
young
man with a strong, thick build and a shaved head. A buhdist
monk,
perhaps? A warrior of the shaolin? Ryouga braced himself for
the
worst, refusing to take his enemy lightly.
As the announcer approaced with portable microphone in hand,
the
two combattants stepped forward and the crowd hushed in
anticipation.
*TODAY'S MATCH, RYOUGA HIBIKI VS. LAI-RI KU-LEE MOH!*
Sarah: Lai-Ri? uhhh..
Eric: Ku Lee?
Sarah: Moh? you dont think?
Lai-Ri Ku-Lee Moh? Bizzare name... almost... Chinese. There
was
something familiar about it, though...
Eric: i am aware of that feeling.
*THE FIGHT PROCEEDS UNTIL ONE SURRENDERS OR IS KNOCKED OUT!*
Ryouga tried to assess Moh by his stance stance, but could
assess
Eric: i think only one stance is called for.
nothing. It wasn't because his stance was unreadable, but that
he
was't in a stance. Moh merely stood there impatiently, arms
crossed
Sarah: the word stance feels very overused.
in front of him.
Clearly, an arrogant guy. This, he felt, would be an easy
match.
*FIGHT!*
*
She could feel the warmth of the gigantic grill that they
both
stood on, knowing that this was _her_ home turf. She had the
advantage here.
Eric: mmmm Ukyou...
Sarah: i cant believe the judges let her have a fight here.
She was surprised that the King of Nerima officials accepted
it as
a place to hold a match, but she wasn't about to complain.
Actually,
she was grateful for the advantage. It'd make pounding her
enemy that
much easier.
Eric: exactly! i mean i can understand there being a fight on it
but letting Ukyou fight there...
"So, Joe, back for more?" sneered Ukyou.
Sarah: joe?
"This time... you fall."
Eric: threaten my Ukyou?!? Go Get im Sarah!
Sarah: no no you go ahead...
Joe the crepe chef. This was the last person Ukyou expected
to see
in the match. She hadn't seen him since she defeated him in
their
crepe vs. okonomiyaki duel a while back when he'd threatened to
drive
her out of business. She thought she'd seen the last of him.
Eric: i'm almost afraid to ask and show my ignorance but is this
made up?
Joe, meanwhile, was tetermined not to waste this shot at
Sarah: determined.
redemption. It'd taken him quite a lot of money to get this
match
arranged, and he had to outbid that weird guy in the octopus
mask to
get this arranged too...
Sarah: so many cameo's who is the weird guy in the octopus mask?
Eric: a mind flayer?
It was at this point that someone in the stands decided to be
a
wiseguy.
"TAAAAAKEEEEOOOUT KOOOOOMBAAAAAAAT!"
Eric: the new video game thats sweeping the nation!
Joe and Ukyou both scowled.
*FIGHT!*
And soon, the air was filled with violent waves of
okonomiyaki and
crepe as the two culinary warriors collided.
Eric: how do you make the food be violent?
Sarah: dont ask me i'm just reading.
*
"What's that?!" asked Moh, gaping while pointing at Ryouga's
shirt.
Eric: dont fall for it!
"Huh? What?" Ryouga looked down briefly, then said, "What's
what?"
Sarah: oh Ryouga.
"That!" yelled Moh, striking forward with his single finger,
stinging Ryouga's chest. Before Ryouga could react to the
underhanded
attack, Moh clenched his hand into a fist and moved it from
Ryouga's
chest to his jaw, connecting solidly, then poked Ryouga in both
eyes.
Eric: ow.
The lost boy staggered back, rubbing his eyes, while Moh
remained
in a 'cool pose' (or so he thought) with two fingers jutting out
like
fangs from his hand.
Sarah: with sharp pointy fangs.
"Now you know the force of STOOGE-FU! Nyuk nyuk nyuk!
Woooooo!"
Eric and Sarah: *groan*
The time bomb that was Ryouga's rage began ticking. He'd
just
fallen for the oldest trick in the book, and he was getting
humiliated
by someone using Stooge-Fu.
Sarah: yes well that is pretty stupid.
Stooge. Fu.
Ranma would never let him hear the end of it.
"Why youuuu...."
Eric: the sound of death coming.
*
"FIGHT HARDER, BOY! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?" bellowed Genma
from
the stands. "HOW DARE YOU SHAME YOUR FATHER THIS WAY!"
Eric: thats right Genma does a fine enough job on his own.
"Not now, DAD!"
Ranma's first round match was against a foe he'd taken on
before,
the Dojo Destroyer. The Destroyer seemed as wide as he was
tall, and
his height was approximately seven feet tall. His technique was
the
use of signboards of dojos that he'd defeated, weilding them
somehow
with telekenesis of some sort, or possibly just incredibly
strong
fighting spirit. He'd defeated 99 dojos, and thus had a swarm
of 99
dojo sign boards to attack with, constantly circling him like
insects.
Sarah: you mean he hasnt defeated since Ranma and Akane defeated
him.
He and Akane took the Destroyer down before, as a team, but
now he
was facing him alone.
Sarah: did akane actually face the destroyer or did Ranma just
save her?
The fight was not going as well as Ranma thought it should.
The
Dojo Destroyer was still standing, and five minutes had already
gone
by. Not only that, but his fighting style had improved,
becoming >much
more effective defensively. Almost every blow was somehow
blocked
Eric: oi i see he's been training.
by
a signboard. The strikes that did make it through were hits to
his
massive stomach, which didn't affect the Destroyer much at all.
Eric: oh the possibilities of being fat.
Sarah: didnt you see Seven... that could be dangerous.
However, the Destroyer hadn't managed to land many hits on
Ranma
either. The few hits he did manage, though, were still
stinging.
And so after a furious exchange of attacks, the two stood
apart by
several yards, each assessing their foe to try and find that one
weak
spot (and get a small rest). Ranma was in his combat stance,
ready to
spring at a moment's notice, while the Dojo Destroyer stood
mightily,
his signboards circling around him like a swarm of bees.
Eric and Sarah: bzzzzzz
<Damn> he thought, <this isn't gonna be as easy as I
thought.>
Eric: damn who thought?
*
"AND *WHAM* STAY *WHAM* DOWN! *WHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAM*"
Sarah: someones ticked off.
A royal stomping wasn't good enough for this clown, or so
Ryouga
believed as he continued to viciously stomp on Moh's prone form
on the
ground. Moh had previously yanked his hair, stepped on his
eyes,
Sarah: stepped on his EYES? STEPPED ON HIS EYES?
Eric: is this a scene from Casino?
Sarah: my god! Ryouga's lost his eyes... *flares up in green* I'm
going to kill you Moh!
Eric: i think its a typo.
Sarah: oh.
stomped on his feet, threw PIES in his face, all after many
ridiculous
distractions he shoudn't have fallen for in the first place.
The
second Moh left himself open, Ryouga began pounding him to the
ground
and hadn't stopped yet.
Sarah: i wonder how long ago that was.
If Ranma made one joke, just ONE joke about this, Ryouga
swore he'd
kill him.
Eric: you just know Ranma's going to say something.
Finally, Ryouga stopped his stomping and cautiously checked
Moh for
signs of consciousness.
Nope, out like a light.
Eric and Sarah: *cheer loudly*
Sarah: rah rah gooo Ryouga.
He sighed and smiled in relief. Round one of the King of
Nerima
tournament was over, at least for him. He idly wondered if
Ranma was
faring as well.
Sarah: you'd think his first concern would be for Ukyou.
Eric: yeah but i bet you the next scene has Ranma in it.
*
Ranma was plowed into the ground by an unmerciful swarm of
dojo
Eric: see?
signboards, feeling strike after strike impact on him, finally
ending
after approximately 48 hits. He was dimly aware of the Dojo
Destroyer
toppling backwards and hoped that his plan worked.
Eric and Sarah: *both cross their fingers*
The plan was fairly simple. He noticed that just before the
Destroyer unleashed a 'heavy' volley of signs, he left himself
wide
open for a brief amount of time. Ranma thought he could exploit
that,
and did, zooming for several chestnut-fist strikes to his vital
points.
Eric: that would have to hurt.
What he didn't expect was for the Dojo Destroyer to be
standing
AFTER his vital points were hit and continue with the volley of
signboards. Hence his current position imbedded in the floor.
He slowly pulled himself from the floor as the Dojo Destroyer
stomped menacingly towards him. Ranma was hurting, but his
willpower
shrugged that aside.
The Dojo Destroyer staggered in his step, then fell to one
knee.
Ranma smiled. The attack _had_ taken its toll, and now the
Destroyer
was leaving himself open again. Now was the time to attack.
"HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Eric: gooo Ranma!
Sarah: yeah yeah yah Ranma.
*
"HAHAHAHAHA!"
Ukyou was gloating. She wasn't normally the type to gloat,
but
Eric: WOOOOOO UKYOU! You're the coolest...
Sarah: Uh huh calm down boy you're rising...
Eric: i'm still sitting.
Sarah: thats not what i meant.
she
really _hated_ Joe. This was also her first time to gloat after
a
Eric: we hate him too!
glorious battle, so she was really trying to enjoy it.
Eric: glorious battle woo woo!
Sarah: I'm sure Ukyou would be impressed by your drooling.
"You aren't looking so hot NOW, are ya sugar? Eh? What's
that?"
She kicked aside small bits of crepe and booted a gigantic
okonomiyaki
casually.
Eric: why would she boot her own food around?
"Ow!" it said. "Let me outta here!"
Eric: oh i see.
"Let you out?" asked Ukyou. Her grin became somewhat scary
as she
brought out a match. "Say... did you know that I use gunpowder
in my
okonomiyaki mix?"
Sarah: kaboom.
"N-no... you wouldn't!"
"Ooooh yes I would!"
Eric: she's sooo cute when she's evil.
"FINISH HIM!" boomed the obnoxious heckler. Ukyou took a
moment to
glare at the stands, then dropped a lit match.
------BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM-------
*AND THE WINNER, UKYOU KUONJI!*
Eric: yaaaahhhh!
The crowd cheered. Ukyou flashed a winning smile and waved
her
battle spatula. Somewhere in the crowds, the wiseguy came
back...
"FATALITY!"
Sarah: that guy needs to be pounded.
Eric: i hope to see more return appearances.
Meanwhile, the automatic commercial queuing kicked in.
*FOR THE BEST OKONOMIYAKI IN NERIMA, VISIT UCCHAN'S! OPEN
SIX DAYS
A WEEK, CATERING AVAILABLE! CALL 42-UCCHAN FOR DETAILS!*
Eric: i'm already there.
"Damn you," whimpered Joe.
Sarah: wuss.
*
*snip*
Genma stolled out to his destiny, while Ranma took long pulls
from
his gatoraide bottle and wobbled to the nearby bulletin board to
figure out where the others were and if he had a chance to watch
their
matches as well.
Ryouga had a match against some guy with a weird name.
Ukyou was facing... Joe? The crepe chef? And it was
probably too
late to catch that match. She was facing off against him in her
own
gigantic grill / fight ring.
Sarah: i still think its unfair.
Eric: maybe there'll be more matches there.
Akane... Akane... she was at the Furinkan High Gymnasium,
facing
off against...
Eric: who who?
Before he could read further, he was bumped from the side,
spilling
his drink all over the place, including on himself.
"Hey," he, now she, scowled, "watch where yer goin!"
"Sorry, sorry," said a bandanna-clad girl with fangs. "Do
you know
how to get to... to... Ranma?"
Eric: humph i hope it was just luck that brought him to Ranma
first.
"Ryouga? Hey, I was just about to look for you. Seen Ukyou
around?"
Eric: humph shouldnt Ryouga be trying to find her?
"No, I was trying to find her."
Eric: oh good he does know whats good for him.
"Well, come on, let's go find her," said Ranma-chan. "But
before
we do..." She whapped Ryouga-chan on the head savagely.
Sarah: oh great lets get in a fight... sheez...
"Hey! What'd you do that for?!" yelled Ryouga.
"For gettin'us both wet, moron!"
"It was an accident, you jerk!"
Before the two could begin a fight, a gigantic spatula sliced
between them.
Eric: ukyou to the rescue!
"Boys, boys, I just can't leave you two alone for a minute."
Ukyou
sighed, pulling her spatula back up.
"He started it!" yelled Ryouga.
"Did not!"
*CLANG*CLANG* "CUT IT OUT, MORONS!"
Eric hehe
The two wobbled away while Ukyou put her spatula in its
holder.
"Come on, boys, let's go find Akane... we should be able to
catch
some of the action... unless her opponent trashes her totally.
Sarah: not much faith in her though.
Who's
she fighting anyways?"
Sarah: yes anyways?
"I was about to find out until lost boy here made me spill my
drink," said Ranma.
Before the two could start bickering again, Ukyou yelled,
"Drop it
already!" Ryouga and Ranma grumbled and turned away from each
other,
while Ukyou checked the bulletin board.
"Heeey... she's fighting a 'Kurumi Tendo'."
Eric: oh oh... but Kurumi's sooo cute.
Sarah: what would Ukyou or that Kiyone think?
Eric: but kurumi IS cute.
"WHO?" both Ranma and Ryouga said.
*
The ribbon swirled madly in chaotic patters, a red gash in
the air
moving in impossible ways. Even though she was dodging them,
just to
be near their presence sent a slight burning sensation into her
skin.
Eric: I'm sorry for this but .... GOOOO Kurumi!
Akane sprang away to a safe range and tried to get her second
wind.
Her opponent did likewise, quickly tying her ribbon back in her
hair
with deceptive ease. Although she was younger, Akane knew
better than
to be overconfident against the girl. After all, she'd beaten
Akane
once before.
Eric: and with some luck and a well placed blow to the author she
will again!
Kurumi knew her strengths and weaknesses in this match. From
a
distance, she could wear Akane down with her ribbon whip, but at
close
range Akane's strength would surely wear her down.
Sarah: you might want to choose a different set of words for the
second wear her down.
The spectators were many and cheering, mainly beause quite a
lot of
them were from the old Akane Tendo Fan Club. They were worried
about
their number one heroine, but had to admit, this match against
her
apparent relative of sorts was a good one, filled with precision
martial arts and thrilling moments of suspense.
Eric: yeaaaahhh Kurumi!
In the back of her mind, Akane wondered where Ranma was.
"Go for it, Akane!"
Eric: boooo..
"We know you can do it!"
"Don't give up, sugar!"
Sarah: you do realize that you are going against Ukyou now?
Eric: humm, for a good relationship to work there has to be some
conflicts.
Sarah: she ends hers with a spatula...
Eric: i can live with that.
Akane smiled, recognizing Ranma, Ryouga, and Ukyou's cheers.
Her
confidence swelled, and she felt her second wind coming to her.
Eric: boy look at that head!
"Alright, let's finish this," she said quietly. Akane knew
how she
could win this match, but she also knew it might backfire.
Kurumi'd
grown much more skilled with her ribbon, and more dangerous.
Eric: gooo Kurumi!
The match had raged on for too long, she knew. It had to end
now.
Eric: yes with Kurumi's victory!
Kurumi was surprised when Akane began charging forward with a
dead
serious expression. She snaked out her ribbon, intending to
entangle
Akane's legs. Instead, Akane lept over the ribbon, closing in
on
Kurumi fast. The girl reeled her ribbon back, and managed to
sting
Akane's shoulder on its return.
Sarah: you do realize that Akane is going to win this dont you?
Eric: sooo? I can still hope.
Akane didn't stop, was within ten meters, and closing in
fast.
Kurumi panicked, forming a protective shield by whipping the
ribbon in
front of her. Surely, Akane would have to pause a moment for
that.
Eric: only if she breaks her momentum... did you ever think of
jumping out of the way and landing behind her?
Akanne saw the trap of ribbons, but felt that she couldn't
stop
now. She charged through it, getting ribbon burns and stings.
She
screamed inside, but at the front of her mind was the constant
mantra
<Ignore the pain, ignore the pain...>
Sarah: concentrate daniel-san.
Kurumi shrieked in surprise as Akane burst from the frenzied
tangle
of ribbons, burnt, hurt, but still surging forward. With a snap
of
her wrist, the ribbon mass snapped tightly around Akane in a
vise-like
grip. Unfortunately, pulling the ribbon also helped Akane's
momentum
towards her.
Eric: humph... down guys Kurumi.
Before she realized her mistale, Akane was on her and landed
a
Sarah: mistake.
heavy blow to the jaw that knocked her into unconsciousness.
A momenet later, Akane crumpled to the ground, worn by her
injuries
but still conscious.
Sarah: tee hee ... so much for Kurumi.
Ten seconds later, with Kurumi not stirring, the announcer
bellowed
*AND THE WINNER, AKANE TENDO OF THE TENDO DOJO ANYTHING GOES
SCHOOL
OF MARTIAL ARTS!*
She could hear the cheer of the crowd, roaring in the air.
She
could hear Ranma call out her name, and see him rushing out to
the
field.
Akane smiled and closed her eyes.
<I _really_ need a rest.>
Eric: and now an interview with the loser... Kurumi... How do you
feel about your defeat?
Kurumi: well i feel very unfairly treated. A reckless charge
should've been easy to jump over and then catch the oponent off
balance.
Eric: i agree thats no way to lose.
*
---------INTERMISSION---------
Sarah: where are the cups and the dancing popcorn?
*
An hour later, Akane and a crowd of several others were
gathered at one
of the few places to carry the pay-per-view broadcast of the
King of
Sarah: expensive...
Eric: think of the cover.
Nerima tournament, King's Cafe. Several other tournament
fighters were
lounging there as well, winners and losers, in an almost
carival-like
atmosphere.
Eric: its like a circus in there!
"Hey, are you alright?" asked Akane, looking with concern at
Kurumi.
Sarah: sure shes fine just feeling stupid.
"I'm okay," said Kurumi with a bit of a smile. "I should be
asking if
you're okay."
"Yeah, and why'd ya do a stupid thing like jumping into her
ribbon like
that?" asked Ranma. "You coulda hurt yourself!"
Eric you tell her Ranma.
Sarah: *powerblasts Eric* shut up already.
Eric: *blinks*
"Well it WORKED, didn't it?" snapped back Akane, somewhat
irritated.
"Lucky," muttered Ranma.
Eric: and stupid.
"So, how'd your match go, Natsume?" wondered Akane.
Natsume, the elder of the two 'other Tendo sisters',
shrugged. "It
was... dissapointing, I suppose. My adversary was not worthy."
Eric: hehe she'll beat Akane.
"Oh? Who was your opponent?"
"He was named.... Shen Pu," said Natsume, "and he kept on
ranting
Sarah: Shampu?!
Eric: no shen pu.. you know another stooge.
*snip*
****
One...
Ryo blazed forward with alarming speed, his umbrella spinning
in a
blur. Sentaro refused to panic, and calmly lifted up a tea pot
and ladel
to block and counterstrike.
Sarah: gooo Ryo!
Two...
Sentaro raised the pot to block the umbrella slash. He felt
the pot
Sarah: oh yeah that'll stop him.
shudder, but with a surprisingly light touch instead of the
brutal heavy
strike he was expecting.
Three...
As he swung his ladel forward to strike, the tea pot suddenly
exploded,
sending water and metal shards everywhere. Surprised by this,
Sarah: i think he would've been hurt as well..
Sentaro
could only reel backwards and try to cover his face while his
ears rang
>from the sound of the explosion.
Four....
Still reeling back, Sentaro was alarmed when he felt Ryo's
hand
Sarah: alarmed would be the least of his concerns.
snare
his throat tightly. The world spun madly as he felt himself
lifted into
the sky, then slammed head first into the ground unmercifully.
His world
immediately faded into black.
Sarah: you know this has to hurt.
Five.
The crowd was speechless, except for a girl cheering
enthusiastically,
sitting next to a gigantic pig. Ryo smiled and bowed to her.
Sarah: Ryo i swear... *glows green* if you do ONE bad thing to
Akari... i will kill you.
Eric: you do realize he's immune to magic dont you?
Sarah: My power is NOT magic as you are well aware of.
Eric: yeah but i just wanted to clarify it to the reader.
Sarah: good...
*snip*
"AND THE WINNER, RYO MUHOSHIN!"
Sarah: YAAAhhhhh but.... *flares a bright green* only if you are
nice to Akari.
The crowd cheered politely, a few of them very much impressed
(and a
few of them not, after all Sentaro was a martial artist of the
_tea_
variety), and Ryo bowed to them all, taking a moment to glance
downward at
his enemy with contempt.
Sarah: I really like him. BUT ONLY IF HE'S NICE TO AKARI!
And then he began strutting rather fashionably, showing off
the
jacket, shirt, tie...
Sarah: I smell payoff.
"RYO MUHOSHIN'S WARDROBE PROVIDED BY HIKARI'S. SUIT BY
ARMANI.
TIE BY TOMJONAVICH. SHOES COURTESY OF BRUNO MAGLI..."
Sarah: heheh... he knows a good buck when he sees it.
****
//and once again, Sentaro Daimonji leaves the King of Nerima
tournament
in defeat and embarrasment.//
Eric: did they have to end with the once again bit? Talk about
rubbing it in.
"Well... what do you expect from a guy that practices TEA
CEREMONY
martial arts?" said Ranma.
Eric: it is kinda of a joke.
"Don't be so mean, Ranma," chided Akane, giving him a light
elbow.
"Well it's true, ain't it?"
//And on an opposite theme was the match between Anything
Goes Martial
Arts masters Soun Tendo and Genma Saotome.//
Eric: i bet you they knock each other out.
Sarah: probably either they are evenly matched or the author will
refuse to commit to one being better then the other in order to
avoid controversy.
Eric: tsk.
"Aw man! I knew I forgot something!" said Ranma. "I was
supposed to
watch Pop's fight right after Akane's."
Eric: well genma is easily forgetable.
"Well, technically, you are," pointed out Ukyou.
"Oh yeah... good point." Satisfied that he was technically
in the
right, Ranma relaxed again.
//This grueling match of masters just ended minutes ago,
lasting almost
an hour. This spectacular match had several highlights, almost
all of
them in the final minutes as they seemed to give all their
strength in an
effort to defeat each other.//
Sarah: oh oh i smell draw here.
"This is either gonna be real interesting or real stupid,"
muttered
Ranma.
Eric: my vote is for REAL stupid.
****
*snip*
Sarah: *waving some scissors at a cringing Eric* this is getting
real long.
Genma sprang in the air again, aiming for Soun's jaw. This
time,
however, he was suddenly surrounded by a battle aura that
solidified into
a gigantic version of himself. Either this wound end it for
Eric: would.
Soun, or for
himself. The effort of using his battle aura in this manner was
so tremendous that he would surely be too exhausted to fight on
after it
was done.
Sarah: then whats the point of using it?
Surprisingly, Soun didn't panic at the sight of a
monster-sized Genma
flying foot-first at him. He decided to unleash his most
powerful attack
and hope it was strong enough to deflect Genma's titanic foot.
"GEEEEEEEEEEEENMAAAAAAAA!!!"
The spectators fled in panic and several cameramen were blown
away as
the full might of the Tendo School of Anything Goes Martial Arts
Demon's
Head attack was unleased, shattering the battleground. It was
Eric: humm a few things on this, a> we've never actually seen
Soun use this in a fight, usually only when he gets mad and he
doesnt seem to be mad at Genma *shrug*
the most
effort he'd ever put into it, and the Demon's Head he was
generating was
large enough to swallow Genma, battle aura and all.
Sarah: was he tasty?
Genma, as was his nature, panicked. In fact, he was scared
Sarah: in other words : COWARD.
witless, having never seen Soun's demon head strike _that_
powerful.
He passed out from fright and his battle aura immediately
flickered
into non-existence.
Eric: all right Soun wins.
Sarah: maybe we were wrong.
Unfortunately for Soun, there was still the matter of
Sarah: that does not bode well.
physics. Demon's
Head or not, there was still the matter of Genma's rather large
body
flying at him. Soun couldn't dodge because he was still locked
in the
Demon's Head attack, so the end result was a titanic demon's
head with
eyes bulging out in panic and fear as Genma's rump flew towards
his face.
Eric: BWAHHAHA... but whats the point of the demon's head attack
if only to scare opponents.
Sarah: still the image of that face with eyes bulging out is
rather hilarious.
With an absolute lack of grace, Genma's prone form plowed
INTO the
massive ki-projection of the Satanic Soun Face and into its
mouth. It
was immediately distorted in an odd way (some witnesses would
say that
it looked like it swallowed something rather distasteful),
Sarah: the poor head.
turning a
deeper shade of purple, then exploded with a bang.
Eric: personally i think a pop would be more dramatic. *pop*
When the dust settled, both masters of the Anything Goes
School of
Martial Arts were on the floor, deeply unconscious.
Sarah: in a way its not really a cop out,
Eric: but in a way it is, i mean okay so these two are often used
as comedic relief, but Genma did train for years while Soun only
trained indoors, a softer sort of training.
Sarah: *nods*
****
//... and so the match ended with a double knockout.//
"Oh my gosh," said Akane, burying her face in her hands.
"I have no idea what to say," said Ranma quietly.
Eric: hehe, shouldn't you buy renouncing your name.
Ukyou wasn't saying anything, she was too busy snickering.
Sarah: what was Ryouga doing?
*snip*
//Akane Tendo also went on to the second round, taking on
fellow
Anything Goes student Kurumi Tendo in a grueling twenty minute
bout,
Eric: humph poor Kurumi she deserved better.
Natsume Tendo emerged victorious over Stooge Fu practicioner
Shem Pu,
Sarah: humm more stooges.
and Anything Goes Master Happosai defeated his old friend and
rival
Hentosai.//
Eric: oh joy happy.
Sarah: you think that he might've invited Shamps or Mousse or
even lil cologne.
The screen briefly flickered the finishing blow of each of
the matches,
then the announcer took a break for commercials, promising more
hard-hitting action when they returned.
//The full versions of these matches and more will be
broadcast
tonight at ten.//
Sarah: on the NBC TRIPLECAST!
Eric: whose the genius who thought that up.
Sarah: btw, i dont think pay per view has commercials, thats the
point of it, instead of making money through commericalism it
makes money from people paying to watch it.
Eric: excuse me I'M the one who graduated with the degree in
broadcast/cable.
*snip*
*
//... Kinnii of the legendary cult of the Muscle Sword was
defeated
in stunning fashon by Furinkan's own Blue Thunder, Tatewaki
Kuno.//
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!"
Sarah: WHAAAAAAAAAT?
Eric: its possible Kinnii got splashed with cold water.
Sarah: i s'pose, its an easily exploited weakenss.
The footage played out, like a scene from a horror movie.
Kinnii,
massive swordsman of the deadly Muscle Sword cult was struck by
a
blazing upward slash of Kuno's bokken, sending him flying
several feet
back until striking the ground, unconscious.
Eric: why exactly was that like a scene from a horror movie?
Nabiki was speechless, utterly totally speechless. The other
girls
in Nabiki's temporary base of operations (Furinkan High, third
floor)
were also stunned beyond vocal ability. The odds against Kuno
were
pretty high, and they all figured to get a little easy money
from that
matchup.
Sarah: i'm sure someone cleaned up.
Instead, Kuno won, and a handful of lucky bastards just hit
the
jackpot.
"You just HAD to pick NOW to start winning again, Kuno-chan,"
growled Nabiki. "Someone get me footage of that match! I need
it
NOW! And who the hell DID bet on Kuno anyways?"
*
"Hiroshi, my friend, I shall never doubt you again."
"Why thank you, Daisuke."
"Who'd have thunk that betting a modest amount of yen
would've
nailed us the jackpot?"
"These are beautiful days indeed, my friend. Now c'mon,
let's go
find Sayuri and Yuka. We just might get a date."
Eric: *sniff* thats very sweet...
Sarah: HUMPH not all women are looking for guys with money.
*
In a darkened room, a figure leaned back on the plush office
chair,
examining a sheet of paper. A pencil was twirled for a moment,
then
it was moved towards a set of names.
[ROUND TWO: R. Saotome vs. G. Yotaro]
Sarah: since you seem to be using characters we all know and love
i have to ask who is G. Yatoro?
"Hmmm... no."
The name Yotaro was scratched off, and replaced with
something far
more interesting.
Eric: cool.
*
---------ROUND TWO---------
*
"Ranma Saotome, it seems we meet again."
The aforementioned Saotome winced. First the Dojo Destroyer,
now
Kirin. Ranma had taken Kirin on quite a while ago, and it took
unusual circumstances for Ranma to bring him down. Now, under
normal
circumstances, this would be a tough match. Kirin's speed
matched
Ranma's. He used his chopsticks in alarmingly deadly ways,
including
ki blasts. Unless Kirin had been slacking off, this was not
going to
be easy.
Sarah: ahh Kirin.. isnt that a beer?
Eric: So i've been told, but Kirin was pretty good and I wonder
how Ranma's going to beat him.
"Heya, Kirin. How's married life treatin'ya?"
Sarah: so Kirin DID marry Lychee?
Eric: it would appear so.
"It goes well. And you?"
"Eh... not there yet."
"Say, how'd you end up hearin'about this tournament anyway?
I
thought the King of Nerima tournament was a local thing."
"Local?" Kirin frowned. "How odd, then. An invitation was
sent
to the Seven Lucky Gods Dojo, and thus invited, the Seven Lucky
Gods
came."
"Wait... you mean the OTHERS are here?"
Sarah: that should prove interesting.
"That is correct."
"Oh boy," grumbled Ranma. "Great. Who else showed up,
Prince
Toma an'his guys?"
*
"Alas, Prince Toma, we meet again."
"Ah... Tatewaki Kuno, yes?"
Eric: damn Toma is going to fall and he shouldn't until later
rounds.
Sarah: uh huh.
*
Ryouga's match wasn't quite as... it just...
He was facing... well...
"Ook!"
A monkey.
Sarah: the amusing part is how did the monkey get to the second
round?
Eric: yes i'm dying to know who is first fight was with.
"Hey, is this a joke?" asked Ryouga.
The announcer shook his his head. "Nope, no joke. That's
your
opponent. Sanae of the Tea Ceremony School of Martial Arts."
"Ook!" The monkey martial artist flashed a toothy grin.
"I'm not fighting a... a... a MONKEY! This is stupid!"
Eric: to say the least.
Sarah: someones going out of their way to either make Ryouga look
like an idiot or make sure he advances.
"EEK!" Sanae definitely looked insulted, and rattled off a
long
string of 'eek's and 'ook's along with agitated facial
expressions and
a bit of poking at Ryouga's knees (it was a rather short
monkey).
"Shut up!" yelled Ryouga. "Jeez, I'm fighting a monk-"
*********CLANG*********
"Eeeeaaagh." Ryouga shuddered in anger while he took the
small
iron pot off of his head. "Why yo-"
Sarah: no luck, poor ryouga.
Eric: and here i was hoping it was that little Cham Cham from
Samauri Showdown.
*********CLANG*********
Removing the large iron pot from his head, Ryouga's battle
aura
began to rev up.
"THAT'S IT! THE MONKEY DIES!"
Sarah: hello? animal abuse ccenter? I'd like to report a case..
Eric: never mind the monkey is dead meat now.
"EEK!"
What followed wasn't so much a martial arts duel as it was a
public
display of animal abuse.
Sarah: *glows green* but it was sooooo cute.
*
- an hour later-
Once more, in King's cafe, Ranma & company gathered for rest
and
nourishment. The festivities around him seemed rather crowded,
with
Akane, Nabiki, Ryouga, Ukyou, Natsumi, Kurumi, and Prince Toma.
Sarah: humm... that passed rather uneventfully
Eric: it could be as feared and the author actually is slacking
off writing fighting scenes.
Sarah: is there a loser's bracket?
Aside from Prince Toma, they were all there to talk of
battles won
and lost, how their own battles had gone, and to egg each other
Sarah: who did Akane, Natsume and Ukyou face?
Eric: shush it may be revealed to us and i still think Kurumi and
Toma both deserved better.
mercilessly. Prince Toma was busy hitting on Kurumi for a date.
Sarah: they're perfect for each other!
Eric: of course they are! its a match! More more more....
Sarah: they're only minor characters you realize...
Eric: sooo i find it an interesting side story, even if its only
develped in the fringes
"Saw your match, Ryouga," said Ranma. "Good job beatin'the
monkey."
Sarah: bwahahhahaha.
"SHUT UP RANMA!"
"Sheesh, no sense of humor," he replied, rubbing his arms.
"Ow.
Damn, that wasn't a fun match."
Eric: why is he rubbing his arm? i would love to know what
happened in that match.
Sarah: so would i.
"Who was your matchup?" asked Ukyou.
"Kirin," said Ranma. "Head of the Seven Lucky Gods Dojo."
Sarah: still so early on.
Ukyou hmmed. "Oh, wait, you told me about him... he was the
one
that used chopsticks and kidnapped Akane?"
Eric: and he only got beat cuz Ranma had water handy, i wonder
what he used this time.
Akane nodded. "That's the one."
"So that would explain those," said Ukyou, pointing to the
many
narrow chopstic-esque burn marks on Ranma's shirt and hands.
Sarah: you'd think they already know how they fought.
"Yeah, he was no pushover. I'm beginning to think the guy
that
makes the matchups really hates me... and sending all the clowns
your
way, Ryouga."
Sarah: that reminds me wheres the babe Ryo who did he fight?
Eric: on the same line where is the english girl? Noori?
Sarah: coming to think about it she did say she would be in the
tourney.
"It isn't my fault all my matchups were against... just...
RIDICULOUS martial artists!" Ryouga gritted his teeth.
"They're
making me look like a joke out there!"
Sarah: you could even the odds and take them on as a pig.
Eric: he no longer turns into a pig...
Sarah: *poink* oh yeah.
"Well hey, if the shoe fits..."
"YOU SAYING I'M A JOKE?!?!"
As the conversation between the two rambled on into a
shouting
match, Ukyou and Akane rolled their eyes.
"And there they go again," sighed Akane. "So, Ukyou, how'd
your
match go?"
Ukyou shrugged. "Took on some polearm fighter. Not easy,
but not
too hard either. How about you?"
"Kaori Daikoku."
"Never heard'a her," said Ukyou.
"She hasn't been around in a long time... she was an
ex-fiancee of
Ranma's."
Sarah: wow are we dredging some names out of hte wood work.
Ukyou raised an eyebrow. "Another one? Genma's fault,
yeah?"
Eric: who elses?
Akane nodded.
They both became distracted by the rather loud clacking of
keys as
Nabiki impatiently pounded on her laptop.
Sarah: for a second there i though Nabiki was waving her
housekeys around.
"What's got you upset?" asked Ukyou.
"Oh, several things," said Nabiki. "FIRST, the schedule for
the
next round of matches has constantly been late. SECOND, I'm
losing
income because somehow... SOMEHOW... Kuno-chan's been winning!"
Sarah: you have such little faith in the dork.
The table fell silet, except for Toma, who was telling Kurumi
about
this great stretch of beach on the south end of Togenkyou
Island...
Eric: its Perfect!
Sarah: they are soooo cute together, i just wanna tweak they're
cheeks.
"Waitaminute," said Ranma. "Kuno won AGAIN?"
Nabiki nodded.
"Who'd he beat this time? Must be someone pretty pathetic,"
said
Ranma smugly.
Eric: tsk Ranma, you're ego is getting the better of you.
Nabiki pointed at Toma, who at that moment grinned rather
sheepishly.
Sarah: oh sure HUMILIATE him when he's trying to pick up Kurumi.
"I... guess I underestimated him," offered Toma as an excuse.
Eric: no no...
"Two strong wins in a row is no coincidence," said Nabiki.
"I had
footage of his two victories sent to a few analysts. Before
tomorrow's matches, I should have an answer."
Sarah: humm why not simply take advantage of the situation since
the new round hasnt been posted it doesnt matter, just switch the
odds.
Eric: cuz maybe he's getting lucky.
Sarah: WOAH that ended rather abruptly!
Eric: i kept looking for more, humm
Sarah: i would say overall this is a great story.
Eric: a couple of things though is that the tourney was popped on
us, i wasnt expecting it to begin for another chapter or two,
there was no build up to the tourney it began without fanfare or
anything. I think it might've been nice to see how the city was
reacting, since its apparent its not a local thing as Ranma
thought.
Sarah: I agree and even so there would be people coming in to see
the fighting.
Eric: also because of the enormity of the cast you are trying to
handle it seems like you are forgetting a few, like Noori.
Sarah: though she may have been purposely left mysterious.
Either way you seem to be knocking off some of the main fighters
that Ranma fans might be familiar with early on. It just a
personal thought but i would think that they might fight later on
instead.
Eric: i would hate to see it come down solely to the main Ranma
cast, even if they are outstanding martial artists, eventually
some of them are going ot have to lose. Akane may be good but
she's not that good and eventually they are going to have to face
off against they're prosepective male counterparts.
Sarah: the other problem that you seem to be running into is
twofold: you are growing tired of writing fight scenes like you
said and it shows, especially in the way you passed over the
second round of fighting. Whether it was intentional or not it
did leave me feeling a little disappointed. Ranma's fight with
Kirin would've been great as well as one of the fights with Kuno.
Eric: still i like how the stories progressing and i can't wait
to see how it turns out.
Sarah: coincidentally on the how to end it problem, how about a
slight clue or hint as to what the mysteerious scheduler is up
to.
Eric thanks and later!
Sarah: BYE!