<Hikaru and a girl with lavender hair who looks suspiciously like Lurker
walk into the theater, dressed like Rally Vincent and Minnie May. The
lights in the theater suddenly become flashing blue and red strobes, as the
fast, high-voltage beat of "Hateshinai Toiki" pumps into the room.> After a
little while, the music fades, and the lighting returs to normal, as Hikaru
and the lavender-haired girl take their seats.>

Hikaru: Okay, we got *that* out of our system...

Other girl: <giggle> Sorry about that. I *finally* managed to download an
MP3 of Hateshinai Toiki without something screwing up. I'm happy. 

<Hikaru pours hot water over the girl, who reverts back to "her" true form,
Lurker>

Lurker: Okay, now we're sending up god-boy's latest offering, the fifth
chapter of Oh! My Brother!

Hikaru: <frowns> Where's Skuld-chan?

Lurker: <shakes his head> Skuld won't be joining us for this one, since
she's starring in the fanfic.

Hikaru: Oh. So where are Chichiri and Gendou?

Lurker: <sigh> Chichiri went on a spiritual purification trip...if you ask
me, he's just going around trying to pick up girls....

<a blue-haired head and a straw kasa poke up through the floor of the
theater.>

Chichiri: I heard that, no da. <disappears again>

Lurker: <sweatdrop> Uh, yeah. And Gendou...well...

<cut scene to Makudonarudo. Gendou is behind the counter, punching a
customer's order into the register.>

Gendou: <pushes his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose> Would you
like...fries with that? <grins sinisterly. The kid he's waiting on gulps,
pisses himself, and runs screaming from the restaurant.>

Hikaru: ...I see.

Lurker: Anyway, let's get to the fic, shall we?

It was a beautiful day.

My internship at Comtel had finally ended, and I could get back to doing
the one thing I loved/hated more than anything else - going back to

school.

It took a lot of work on my part to negotiate with my home university and
NIT to figure out how to complete my degrees.  I had a sneaking suspicion
even the Ultimate Force can't push bureaucracies too much.

Lurker: Bureaucracies...the bastard child of society.

Hikaru: <blink> You're starting to sound too much like Gendou-kun...

Yes, I said degrees.  My home U had this wonderful arrangement where you
could take a computer science and engineering degree at once, and I

decided

to take advantage of it. The NIT folks weren't too pleased, but after a

lot

of talk, we finally agreed on a course plan.  Too bad they made me take

an

extra year.  Oh well, at least I'll be able to say I'm class of 2000.

Lurker: Let's hope so...

The birds were singing as I walked down the street to the temple after my
first day of classes.  Going for walks had become one of my favorite

things

to do, since I suddenly had the endurance to enjoy it.  I watched the
cherry blossoms fall from the trees in the setting sun, and smiled.  The
scene was truly romantic, and my heart was warmed merely to witness it.

Run for your lives, Tokyo.  Christopher James Angel, God of Moments,
Brother to the Norns, was in love.

Hikaru: O_O!

Lurker: That was fast...

***

My first day of class at a new university.  I felt like I was a freshman
again. Never mind the fact that I was a fourth year student, only two

years

from graduating with two degrees, I was at a NEW school.  It didn't help
matters at all that Skuld had decided she wanted to go to university too.

Lurker: Isn't she a bit young? <narrowly dodges a telescoping hammer>
Errr...guess not.

So there we were, standing in front of the NIT Engineering Building.  It
was a large, sprawling building, obviously a victim of add-on-itis, that
common disease that hits buildings in universities all over the world.  I
detected at least four different building styles.

Lurker: So it's contageous.

Hikaru: Hope it's not terminal...

Lurker: Only when it infects airport parking.

Hikaru: <sweatdrop>

"Skuld?" I asked.

"Yes?"

"Why are you taking classes?"

"I was getting bored at home," she said defensively.

I grinned.  Translation:  Boss ordered her to get out more.  That kid

spent

FAR too much time in that room of hers.  I digested that for a moment. 
"Skuld?"

"Yes?"

"How did you convince them to let a twelve year old into university?"

Lurker: Very carefully?

She gave me a 'don't be an idiot' look.  "I hacked together some high
school records.  They think I'm a genius."  She paused then added,

"They're

right, but I needed proof."

"Uhh...why didn't you just fake some class records so you wouldn't have

to

take all the artsy crap?"  Skuld and I shared the official engineering
disdain for anything non-science related. It wasn't that we really

thought

it was crap (well, not ALL of it), but we just had to pretend we did. 
Engineers have a reputation to maintain, you know.

Lurker: Of course. <rolls eyes>

She paused for a long moment.  "That wouldn't be fair." Translation:  I
didn't think of it and I'm too proud to admit it.  As you can tell, I was
enjoying this conversation immensely.

Hikaru: <giggle>

"Skuld?"

She growled in exasperation. "WHAT?"

Lurker: Oooh...someone's bitchy...<dodges another hammer> Sheesh!

Hikaru: That one, you had coming.

"When did we start speaking Swedish?"

Lurker: O_O!

Hikaru: <snicker>

Her answer was cut off as we walked through the doors and came upon IT. 
That monstrous, ten-foot tall statue of a samurai.  It was awe-inspiring.

It was grotesque.  It was stupendous.  It was ridiculous.  It was the

most

touching thing I had ever seen.

Lurker: Cool...

It was Lego.

Lurker: <facefault>

Hikaru: <sweatdrop> How....creative...

I looked down at Skuld, and tapped her on the shoulder, bringing her out

of

her own reveire.  She tilted her head back and, and her mouth moved as

she

tried to say something and failed.  I grinned.  "This, I like."

Lurker: Heh.

My schedule did suck though.  Two classes in the Engineering Building, a
run across campus to take my obligatory arts class (Sociology) and then a
run back to take my last class.  *Oh well, could be worse, I could be
Skuld.*  

Lurker: <nod> Nothing could be worse than being Skuld. <doesn't *quite*
manage to dodge the hammer this time, and it detonates a plastique mine in
his face>

Hikaru: <winces> Ooooh....that's going to need stitches...and a really good
plastic surgeon....

The poor kid had to run all over the university.  It's quite a
sight seeing a this five-foot-nothing girl run around with a backpack

full

of books that's almost as big as she is.  Surprisingly, no one made much

of

a fuss over it.  Of course, that might have been because of the six-four
giant who she hung around with...

Lurker: What a pair they make.

Hikaru: <piku> Anou...how did you recover so quickly?

Lurker: Law of Anime #6: Serious damage is only incurred in an actual
combat sequence. Not in slapstick gratuitous-injury scenes.

Hikaru: <piku> Oh.

Anyway, it was at my Sociology class that I met HER.  The moment I saw

her,

we locked eyes, and I had a sudden understanding of how Belldandy felt

when

she saw Keiichi for the first time.  I thought time had stopped as we

gazed

at each other, (it hadn't) and I smiled tentatively at her.  She blushed
and looked away.

Lurker: She blushed because your fly was open...

Hikaru: <snicker>

At least she was to me.  I'll be honest, I've seen more beautiful women. 
But there was something about her that screamed at the very fiber of my
being.  She was tallish for Japan, by my guess roughly five-foot-ten or

so.

 She had long, dark brown hair that was the slightest bit wild, as if she
had been walking in a strong breeze.  She was obviously an athlete, but

her

figure was extremely good.  (I expect she didn't appreciate it as much as

I

did.)

Lurker: <snicker>

Hikaru: <sigh> I'm surrounded by perverts...

But oh, gods in heaven, 

Lurker: Which you, of course, are one of...

her face.  Her skin tone was a sort of dark beige,
and it was obvious it was her natural skin tone.  Her eyes were a rich
brown, the color of deeply stained wood, and their slight almond shape

made

her look more exotic than the regular Japanese.  She had a cute nose,

that

sort of curved up at the end.  No doubt she looked unbearably cute when

she

wrinkled it.  Her lips were full and rich, and they just begged to be
kissed.

Lurker: In other words, she's cute.

Somewhere back in my mind, a little voice was screaming "Danger!  Danger!

You do NOT fall in love like this, Chris.  Snap out of it!"  I locked

that

little voice away and forgot about it.  That voice kept me from getting a
date all through high school, I was through listening to it.

Lurker: <snicker>

Hikaru: <giggle>

I sat in the row of seats ahead of her.  I knew if I had to see her back
day after day, I'd never pay any attention.  After twenty minutes of
listening to the prof, I resolved to sit behind her (or hell, beside her)
at the next class. This man gave whole new meaning to the phrase 'bad
prof'.  If he wasn't boring the class to death for ten minutes, he was
quoting some obscure fact that was out of date/inaccurate/just plain

WRONG.

Lurker: I've had teachers like that...

After he finished speaking, 'Bob' asked us if there were any questions or
comments.  I dutifully put my hand up, and started the first of my
soon-to-be-infamous arguments.  "Professor, you claim the internet is not

a

culture..."

Lurker: Scurrilous dog! Slay him immediately!

"Call me Bob.  I insist."

Lurker: Anou...is Brent Spiner cast to play this guy in the movie version? 

Hikaru: <giggle>

Lurker: Or perhaps Ben Stein?

Hikaru: <laugh>

I heard a laugh behind me, and there she stood, holding out a book. 

"This

is the one you're looking for."  Man, she was right on SO many levels.  I
dumbly took the books from her hand and smiled.

"Thanks.  I'm Chris Angel."

Lurker: Nice and forward there...

Hikaru: Oh, hush...

She arched an eyebrow.  "Just a few religious references there."  I

winced

inwardly.  She had no idea how many.  "Hitomi Nickolas."  Well, that

Lurker: O_O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hikaru: Wonder where *that* name came from?

confirmed my hypothesis that she wasn't a pure Japanese.

"Oniichan!!  Hurry up!"  Skuld came running around one of the shelves. 
"Haven't you found that book yet?"  She grabbed my free hand and scowled

at

Hitomi.  "Who's she?"

Lurker: Uh-oh. Here we go again...

I stopped Skuld after we walked out of the bookstore.  "Skuld, what the
hell was that?  An extension of your Keiichi complex?"  She blushed
guiltily.  "I'm a grown man, I can choose my friends myself." 

Skuld looked ashamed.  "But...but...you're a god now!"

Lurker: Even gods get horny...

<Lurker is whapped from every direction by every imaginable weapon>

"Skuld, you, your sisters, and a few others excluded, the gods are the

most

shallow, self-absorbed, BORING group I've ever met!  I'm not surprised
Belldandy fell for a mortal and Urd has no use for the rest of them."  I
felt bad about saying that, but it was true.  Thrudr was maybe the best

of

the other goddesses, and even with her, everything came back to her love

of

fighting.  It was like talking to a broken record.  Freya was a flighty
twit that irritated the hell out of me.  I liked her brother though. 

Don't

even START me on the Valkyries.

Lurker: Not too opinionated, is he?

"I appreciate it, but trust me.  Don't try to force Belldandy to choose
between you and Keiichi.  It's not fair to you or her."  *And you'll

lose.*

 I grinned suddenly.  "As for me, I just met the girl, before I decide I
want to spend the rest of my life with her, I'd like to get to know her
first."  I cocked my head to the right, dropped the grin into a

half-smile.

 "Hey, Miss short, brunette and unbearably cute, I'm still your big
brother, I always will be. OK?"

Lurker: Awww, how sweet. <pulls out an airsick bag and fills it>

Hikaru: Ewww, Lurker-kun! That was rude! ...and gross...

Skuld nodded miserably, on the verge of tears, and threw her arms around
me, hugging me.  "Yes, Oniichan."  Hugging her back I glared at the
audience we had gained, and sent across a silent message - if one person
applauded, there'd be hell to pay.  

Lurker: <imitating Kami-sama> Hey! You're not supposed to help raise funds
for our competition!

Hikaru: Anou...can't you get struck down, or plagued, or cast into hell for
imitating Kami-sama?

Lurker: <sweatdrop> It's just a fanfic, you should really just relax...

"Isn't this cute," a familiar voice said behind me.  Skuld stiffened and
gave a growl I knew well.  It's the 'oh, look, it's Urd, where did I put

my

hammer' growl.

Lurker: <snicker>

"Hi, Urd," I sighed, and let go of Skuld.  "Just having a little
brother-sister talk."  I picked up the books I dropped.  "So what's up? 

I

thought you were off irritating the lovebirds."

Lurker: <chortle>

Hikaru: <giggle>

"They're in class," she grumbled.  "So I thought I'd check out some

college

boys, and saw you two.  What's wrong?"  Urd does care about her sisters,
you know.  She may do it in a rather...unrestrained manner, but she

tries.

Lurker: <imitating Splinter> Try...harder.

"Aww, nothing," I said.  "Skuld didn't like the fact I was interested in

a

girl, that's all."

Lurker: <sigh> Bad move, god-boy. Baaaaaaaad move...

Over time, I learned there are a few things you should never mention

around

my sisters.  Around Skuld, you should never mention a new ice cream

store. 

Around Belldandy, you should never mention a new recipe.  Around Urd, you
should never, EVER mention your love life.  Too bad I didn't know that

then

- it would have saved me a lot of pain.

Lurker: You asked for it...

Skuld groaned and smacked herself on the forehead while Urd got this

feral

gleam in her eye.  "You're interested in a girl?  Let your sister help!"

Lurker: <groan>

Hikaru: <sigh> 

One of these days I'm going to learn to shut up.

Lurker: Yeah right. Get our hopes up.

"That's every single piece of information you could possibly want on

Hitomi

Nickolas," Urd stated proudly, and then smiled.  "Down to how to please

her

best in bed."  

Lurker: O_O

Hikaru: Urd no HENTAI!

I must have blushed beet red.  "That's what I thought you said."  I shook
my head and handed the envelope back to her.  Tempted as I was, I really
didn't need to know all that.  Hell, I wasn't sure I wanted to.  "Thanks,
but I'd rather do it the old fashioned way."

Lurker: He'll...*earn* it.

Hikaru: <groan>

"She sure did," Urd confirmed.  "Their wedding night is going to be the
best night..."

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!" I yelled, overriding the rest of her speech. 

Lurker: I don't blame him. Thinking about Keiichi and Belldandy that way
seems...obscene.

Hikaru: <piku^2> *Lurker* finds something obscene? <goes into shock>

"Urd," I heard Belldandy say softly as I entered the hallway, "can I see
that please?"  Just as I was closing my door, I heard two words which
scared the living daylights out of me.  "Oh my!"

Lurker: Whoa...Kasumi mode *on*...

Did I mention it got worse?

Lurker: O_O

Hikaru: <turns several interesting shades of green>

Lurker: And that does it for another great chapter of Oh! My Brother. Til
next time!

--------------------------------------------------------------------
Kunou makes a challenge to Rei, while more than 
one person is snooping around for information on the 
enigmatic albino. 
Jikai ni: ReGenesis: Half Impact, 3:3. 
Saabisu, saabisu!

---
Reunions and tearful farewells in Tokyo, and the
start of a dangerous trek to find the Escudo, as
the young defenders of Cephiro prepare for the
dangerous battle to come.
Jikai ni: Onna: Red Side, Chapter 19.
Don't miss it!

---
The Eternal Lost Lurker
EternalLostLurker@worldnet.att.net
-------------------------------------------------------------------