Here's a repost of the first part for anyone who missed it, and the second
part of Bishoujo Senshi Kekko Moon. Enjoy...I think...

The Eternal Lost Lurker (EternalLostLurker@worldnet.att.net)

Note that this is a spoof, and therefore much of the backstory that would
normally go with such a fic has been left out. 
Warning: This is an ecchi fanfic...

Because someone *had* to do it...

**********

	Some believe the universe is run by a gigantic computer system.
Invariably, this system screws up. Usually it's not a big deal, but
sometimes it has disatrous consequences.
	Of course, sometimes the consequences are just damned funny.

*****written by The Eternal Lost Lurker*****

	Say, for instance, that somewhere, a computer is monitoring the
distribution of special abilities handed down to special people, whose
purpose in life has already been fated: the people we refer to as
superheroes. 
	Generally, the system makes sure that the right abilities go to the right
heroes at the right time and place.
	However, no system is completely foolproof.

*****apologies to Naoko Takeuchi and Go Nagai*****

	This is the tale of one such cosmic foul-up...


**********

	In Juuban, a girl named Osaka Naru was screaming for help, as a demonic
creature which had impersonated her mother mercilessly attacked her,
hell-bent on draining her of her precious life energy.

	Across town, a black cat with a crescent moon on its forehead revealed a
precious secret to a young girl with long hair tied up in odango: the fact
that she could speak.
	"Listen to me, Usagi," the cat said. "My name is Luna..."
	"No way! A talking cat! It's not possible!"
	Luna sighed. "Usagi, listen to me, this is important! Your friend Naru is
in danger!"
	This brought Usagi up short. "Wha? Naru-chan? What...?"
	"There's no time for this!" the cat snapped, and leapt into the air, doing
a backflip. A crescent-moon shaped pendant appeared in midair, and fell to
the bed. Luna stared at it, blinking. "Odd...it was supposed to be a
brooch..."
	"What is that?" Usagi asked.
	"It's your destiny," Luna said. "Wear this pendant, and repeat after me:
Moon Prism Power, Make-Up!"
	Usagi did as she was asked. Nothing happened. "Well, now that we have
*that* out of our system..." Usagi smirked.
	Luna sweated. "I...I don't understand. That was supposed...you're supposed
to be..."
	"Supposed to be *what*?"
	Luna blinked. "I know it's you. You're supposed to be Sailor Moon! You
should have transformed into the warrior of the Moon Kingdom!"
	Usagi snorted. "Yeah, whatever..."
	"You must believe me! It's true! Would I make up something like that?"
	Usagi shrugged. "I think this is all just a weird dream anyway."
	Luna shook her head. "No...you *must* try again! Please!"
	Usagi sighed. "If I do, will you shut up and go away?" Luna nodded,
growing a sweatdrop. Usagi smirked, and began to shout, "Moon Prism..."
then she stopped, and shook her head, as if to clear it. "Wait...that's not
right," she said. Luna blinked. "Something...I feel words...I'm just not
sure..."
	Luna's eyes widened. "Usagi, whatever the words are, say them! Quickly!"
	Usagi nodded, and clutched her pendant. "Moon...FLASH!"
	The room exploded in blinding light...

	"Now, foolish girl, your energy will be MINE!!!"
	"NOOOOOO!!!!!!" Naru screamed as the youma advanced...
	"Hold it right there!" intruded a fairly embarrassed sounding voice. Naru
and the youma both turned to look at the shop entrance. A female silhouette
stood in the doorway.
	"Who dares?" the youma demanded.
	"I do," the voice said. It mumbled something about feeling ridiculous and
being embarrassed, then continued, "I stand for love and justice, and won't
allow you to harm innocent people!" 
	"Is that so?" the youma sneered, and took a shot at the figure. The
mystery woman leapt into the air, and somersaulted forward, landing in
plain view. The youma and Naru were both caught off-guard.
	Standing in the center of the store was a young woman, probably a
teenager. She wore knee-high red boots with crescent moon emblems near the
tops, and long white gloves with red trim. She also wore a mask which
covered her entire head. The mask itself was white, but the front had a
large golden ornament shaped like a crescent moon, which covered her lower
face, and curved around her eyes, which were visible through shielded
openings in the mask. 
	Aside from that, she was completely nude. 
	"Who the hell!?" the youma asked.
	Performing silly gestures with her hands, the naked girl said, "Ai to
seigi no, kekko bishoujo senshi...Kekko Moon! Tsuki ni kawatte, oshioki
yo!"
	After her speech, she hissed out of the side of her mouth, "Luna, I swear
when this is over I'm going to *kill* you."
	In the shadows of the store, the black cat bigsweated. 

	*****bishoujo senshi kekko moon*****

	The youma snarled. "Well, Kekko Moon...whoever you are...prepare to die!"
It grew several needle-like projections out of its shoulders, and began
firing them at Kekko Moon, who dodged frantically. Rolling to the side,
Moon whined, "Luna! What am I supposed to *do*?"
	Luna frowned. "Well, ordinarily you would use your tiara to defeat it..."
	Kekko Moon grabbed the black cat and strangled her. "DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE
A TIARA!?"
	"Calm...down...urk..." Luna frowned. "You must have some sort of
weapon..."
	"I don't even have anything to carry a weapon *with*," Usagi grumbled.
	Luna frowned, then slowly said, "Well..." and looked pointedly at Usagi's
nether-regions.
	Usagi blinked, then looked down, and blushed furiously. "Kono hentai neko!
That's too disgusting to think about!"
	Luna shrugged as best as she could. "You never know..."
	Kekko Moon suddenly had to dodge a few more needles, and landed several
meters from the youma. *Well, it's worth a shot,* she decided. Blushing
furiously, she reached down...

	The youma stared incredulously as Kekko Moon appeared to be... "What the
hell? In the middle of a fight? Are you that perverted, girl?" it yelled.
	Kekko Moon blushed. "Shut up! It's not like that! I'm trying to find
something to kill you with!"
	The youma smirked. "I don't think the odor of your..."
	Kekko Moon glared at the youma. "HEY! That's rude!" She crossed her arms.
"Besides, it doesn't stink..."
	Luna and Naru both sweatdropped. "Get ON WITH IT!" Luna snapped.
	"Okay okay," Kekko Moon said, and began searching herself. After a moment,
she shouted, "Aha! Got it!" She started to pull her hand out from between
her legs, then frowned. "What the-? Hey! What's the deal here?"
	"Are you finished yet?" the youma asked.
	"Gimme a minute. It's stuck," Kekko Moon said. She arched her back, and
raised one leg to the sky. The youma saw a glint of silver between her
legs. Kekko Moon began pulling at it. 
	Several seconds later, the youma, Naru, and Luna all stared in shock.
Kekko Moon blinked at the four-foot long, shimmering silver rapier in her
hand. Its hilt was a golden crescent moon. "How the--!?" 
	"Didn't that *hurt*?" the youma asked.
	Kekko Moon shook her head, then charged. The youma dodged and tried to
parry swing after swing with the rapier. Finally, Kekko Moon managed to
impale the creature through the arm. It screamed in pain.
	"Finish it off now, Kekko Moon!" Luna yelled.
	"Right!" Moon shouted. Then, something came to her, and she knew how to
finish off the youma. Withdrawing her sword, she backflipped away twice,
and began running forward again.
	"What--?" the youma wondered as it recovered its senses. Kekko Moon dived
into a forward flip. "FULL MOON!" she shouted. In the middle of the flip, a
beam of light shot from between her legs, tearing through the youma and
disintegrating it. Kekko Moon landed on her feet, and blinked. Luna emerged
from the shadows. 
	"Well done, Kekko Moon," the cat said. Kekko Moon glared at her. 
	"Luna...does the word "spayed" mean anything to you?"
	Luna gulped, and bolted for the door. 

	*****

	It was Kekko Moon's fourth battle, and things weren't going very well. 
	The youma in question had invaded a cram school, where the
less-than-dressed warrior's new friend Ami was studying. 
	Mizuno Ami, for her part, was watching the battle, thinking, "How can that
girl be so calm about running around naked?"
	The youma snarled and fired a volley of sharpened paper at Kekko Moon. She
managed to dodge all but one piece, which tagged her on the chest, leaving
a small but noticeable papercut on her right breast. "Alright, that's it!"
Kekko Moon shouted. She raised one leg high into the air, and reached into
her...
	Ami flushed. *What kind of pervert is she!?*
	The youma had been warned about this, and was trying in vain to ignore the
strangeness of it. Ami, however, gaped in shock as Kekko Moon extracted her
silver rapier from her...Ami winced in pain at the *thought* of that.
	The youma, not particularly impressed, wadded up a huge ball of paper as
Kekko Moon began to charge. It flung the paper, striking Kekko Moon
full-on. The nude girl was knocked across the room, and slammed into the
wall. She slumped to the floor, dazed. The youma laughed evilly, and
tightened its grip on its hostage's neck. Ami screamed as the youma raised
a sharp-looking blade...
	Luna, who had been watching from under a desk, gasped. The sigil of
Mercury flared brightly on Ami's forehead. The youma, surprised and
thinking it was under attack, relaxed its grip, and Ami dove free,
scrambling for cover under a desk.
	Luna did a backflip, and a blue pendant with the sigil of Mercury
appeared. She caught it with her teeth, and dashed over to where the
blue-haired girl had hidden. Meanwhile, Kekko Moon had recovered her
senses, and stood shakily, gripping her sword tightly. The youma noticed
her, and stalked towards her.

	"Ami!" hissed a voice. The girl looked around for the source of the
whisper, and blinked as a black cat with a crescent-moon shaped mark on its
forehead padded towards her, carrying something in its mouth. The cat
dropped its burden, a blue pendant, in front of her, and spoke. "Quickly!
You must use this pendant, and help Kekko Moon!"
	Ami stared at the cat. "What--what's going on? You can talk?"
	"Yes! There's no time for this. You are the senshi of Mercury. You must
use this pendant to transform, and help Kekko Moon!"
	Ami frowned in confusion. "I don't understand..."
	The cat sighed. "My name is Luna. I'm a guardian and advisor to the
Sa...the *Kekko* Senshi," she amended, turning slightly red. "When the
youma tried to kill you, the sigil of Mercury appeared on your forehead.
That marks you as the warrior of the planet Mercury. Now, quickly, take
that pendant, and say "Mercury Flash!"
	From across the room, Kekko Moon screamed. The youma laughed maniacally.
Ami frowned, and picked up the pendant. "Mercury Flash!"

	Kekko Moon backed nervously into the wall. The youma had grown wicked
ten-inch claws, and was slashing at her. She dodged and parried. Then, one
swipe clipped her wrist, causing her to scream in pain and drop her sword.
The youma laughed. 
	The young, unclad superheroine scrambled to figure out what to do. She
didn't have enough distance to use her Full Moon attack, and she doubted
she could get to her sword without being skewered. 
	Suddenly, a nervous, *very* embarrassed voice rang out. "Shouben Spray!"
The youma looked up, startled, as a thick, pungent yellow fog filled the
room.
	Kekko Moon's nose wrinkled. "Eeew, what is that *smell*?" Hearing the
youma grunt and shuffle off, she reached down and picked up her sword. 
	The mist began to clear, to the relief of everyone in the room. Kekko Moon
saw the youma, and another person. Standing atop a desk was a girl,
probably about Kekko Moon's age, attired in blue knee-length boots, white
gloves with blue trim, and a blue mask with an astrological symbol on the
forehead. Aside from that, the new girl was naked as well.
	"I...I'm...Kekko Mercury," she stammered. Judging by the flushed color of
her bare body, her face was probably *very* red. The voice sounded
familiar...
	Kekko Moon walked up to the new warrior, and whispered, "Ami?"
	Kekko Mercury started. Meanwhile, the youma recovered, and began to
attack. Kekko Mercury arched her body backwards, spread her legs slightly
apart, and shouted, "Shouben Spray!" A yellow fog began to issue from her
body, filling the room.
	"Eeeeeeeeewwwww!" Kekko Moon said. "So *that's* what that was!"
	The outline of the youma was still visible through the foul mist. With a
short running start, Moon began a forward flip, near the end of which she
shouted, "FULL MOON!" A blinding beam of light shot from between her legs,
and with a final bellow of pain, the youma disintegrated.
	The mist dissipated. Kekko Mercury landed beside Kekko Moon. "Luna?" Moon
called. The cat appeared.
	"Kekko Moon, meet the second Senshi, Kekko Mercury."
	"We've met," Moon said. Quietly, she asked, "Is Mercury Ami-chan?"
	"H--hai," Mercury said, shuffling her booted feet. "H--how do you know
me?"
	Moon sighed, and reversed her transformation, grateful for the school
uniform which covered her body. Kekko Mercury blinked. "Usagi-chan!?"
	Usagi nodded. Mercury fell off the desk.


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Zankoku na tenshi no TEEZE
Madobe kara yagate tobitatsu
Hotobashiru atsui PATOSU de
Omoide wo uragiru nara
Kono sora wo daite kagayaku
Shounen yo shinwa ni nare

The Eternal Lost Lurker
EternalLostLurker@worldnet.att.net

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