Sarah: are you sure you want do it yet another one?

Eric: i'm wide awake as a puppy.

Sarah: haven't we been spending too much money recently?

Eric: for what?  You mean worthless things like tickets to LA? We'll
just have to cut back on our expenses.

Sarah: tell you what, i'll take up smoking and then quit.

Eric: great, giving up smoking is the hardest thing you'll ever do,
here's a dollar.

Cubicle: *lumbering into view* but she didnt do anything!

Eric: didnt she Cubicle, didnt she?  Hey wait a minute she didnt!

Sarah: *power blasts Cubicle into next week, which as you all know is
tomorrow* Boy, i almost got away with it.

Thomas Schmidt wrote:

Because the world can always use another Ranma alternate history
fic...

Sarah: sure we can!

Eric: you're not part of the world you're a figment of my imagination.

Sarah: if you prick me do i not bleed?

Eric: no.
 

They Shall Be One Flesh

Eric: cool a lemon!

Sarah: what makes you think its a lemon?

Eric: the word flesh.
 

         Ranma Saotome sat alone at the dinner table in the Tendo Dojo,
 staring into a cup of tea.  Akane Saotome sat across from him, her
 hand tracing the curve of the delicate wood, also alone.  Later, each

Eric: humm very freudian image.

 went upstairs.  They met in their bedroom, and Ranma watched Akane
 silently cry herself to sleep.

Sarah: the cad and he did nothing to comfort her?

        This was their honeymoon.  They had met for the first time
yesterday.

Sarah: they're spending their honeymoon in the dojo.

Eric: boy talk about cheap.  still its sad that they got married so
quickly.  Can't wait to find out what happened.
 

         Ranma rose early the next morning to do his exercises.  He couldn't
 wait until his Pop got back; nothing compared to sparring with a real
 person.  He ran smoothly through several kata before he noticed Akane
 standing in the doorway, dressed in a gi.  Her long black hair flowed
 down her back; it looked as if it had not been combed.  "I practice
 here every morning," she said when he came to a stop.  "You have to
 find someplace else."

Sarah: and they're married, maybe she should give him a chance.

Eric: how would you feel if you were married off to a guy you hardly
knew?

        "Oh," Ranma said.  "You really do martial  arts, then?  I think your
dad said."

Sarah: what he didnt believe her?

        "Of course I do," Akane said.  She entered the dojo and
stood with her arms crossed under her breasts, scowling pointedly.

Eric: you see its the way those japanese draw their noses, their nice a
pointy.

        "Uh, yeah," Ranma said.  "Do you want to spar?"

Sarah: at least he's making an effort.

        Akane's scowl deepened.  "Ranma, I don't think you understand," she
said.  "I hate you.  I hate that I am married to you and I hate that
you didn't do anything about it.  Get out."

Sarah: well now that she puts it that way i can sympathize with her.

Eric: you so can i but, its not entirely his fault.

        Ranma was a little taken aback by her bluntness.  "Be that way," he
said.  "It's not like I care."  His mind raced for an insult,
something that would really get to her.  "You are so uncute, anyway."

Sarah: now that seems out of place the uncute statement.  I mean this is
very serious and thats what he says?

Eric: no one every accused Ranma of intelligence.

Sarah: even so.

        Akane's face turned red.  She walked towards him, her hands clenched
into fists.  "Half-girl pervert!" she shouted as she swung wildly at
her husband.  Ranma dodged easily and ran out the door.

Sarah: oh fading in to old stereotypes i see.

        He wandered the Tendo home for a few minutes, admiring the
furnishings.  It was really a nice place; he wouldn't have minded
living here.

Eric: he is living there.  after all he's married to Akane.

        A knock sounded at the door, and after some searching
Ranma opened it.  A fairly tall girl stood on the doorstep, a cheery
smile on her face.  She wore a modest dress and carried a small
basket.  Ranma recognized her.  She was one of Akane's sisters. "Hi,"
he said.  "Nabiki, right?"

Sarah: i'm confused dont they live there as well?

Eric: maybe theres something thats being hidden.

        The girl giggled. "Oh my, no," she said.  "I'm Kasumi.  Good
morning, Ranma."  Kasumi moved to enter, and Ranma stepped aside to
allow her in.  "I know it's still your honeymoon, but I thought you
might like some breakfast."

Sarah: ahh I see, they have the place to themselves.

Eric: but Ranma was expecting his dad.  He is callous.

        Ranma nodded gladly.  "Breakfast sounds great," he said.

Sarah: the legendary Saotome apetite.

        "Just let me set up in the kitchen," Kasumi said as she made her way
there.  "Is Akane awake yet?"
        "She's in the dojo," Ranma said.  He watched Kasumi cook for less
than a minute before becoming bored.  "I guess I'll go watch TV," he
said.

Sarah: you know even the worse attention span is 6 minutes or so.

        "Stay for a while," Kasumi told him.  "We didn't get much
chance to talk before the wedding."

Eric: well at least someone is trying to build bridges.

        He sighed, taking a seat on the counter.  "What do you want to
know?"

Sarah: oh stop being so hard Ranma.

        "I'd just like to get to know you better," Kasumi said.  "Tell
me about yourself."

Eric: well, i'm a very powerful martial artist that just married your 16
year old sister and lemme tell you about last night.. woah.. is she an
animal in bed.

Sarah: Humm...

        Ranma blushed.  "I'm not much good at talking," he said.
        Kasumi busily chopped some carrots.  "What are you good at, then?"
she said.
        "Martial arts, for one thing," Ranma said.  "I'm probably

Sarah: ahh a skill to carry you through life.

the best martial artist in the world."

Sarah: at this point?  I mean cologne hasn't even shown up yet.

Eric: Ranma does have an ego though..

Sarah: even so.

        "Really," Kasumi said.  "How impressive.  You must have worked very
hard."

Sarah: sure just swell his head more.

        "Yeah," Ranma said, nodding.  "Pop and I have been training on
the road for years."
        "Are you sad that's over now?"
        "What?"
        "Now that you've settled down with my sister," Kasumi explained.

Sarah: bam!

Eric: strike the realization home Kasumi!

"Breakfast is almost ready," she said.  "Would you please get your
wife?"
        A horrible thought dawned on Ranma.  "Nabiki, where's Pop
staying?"
        "Kasumi," she said.  "And we're all at the motel just up
the street."  She turned to ask why he wanted to know, but he was
already gone.

Sarah: at least Akane and Ranma aren't at the motel.

Eric: motel 6, we'll leave the light one for you.

 

        Ranma leapt to the next balcony, pausing only long enough to peek in
 the window before continuing on.  If she didn't find Pop soon, she

Eric: woah you should put some sort of transition here.  instead of
boom.

Sarah: you mean like a series of underscores?

Eric: yes like that!

 would have to go talk to the desk clerk, and she was a girl.  She

Sarah: and as we all know, desk clerks dont talk to girls.  Besides its
funner to play peeping tom.  why in that past window, well lemme tell
you, a girl, a monkey and a pingpong ball.

 wasn't really comfortable talking to people as a girl, yet,and it was

Eric: hasnt she gotten used to it by now?  god knows she probably went
days at a time being a girl.

 raining, so it would be difficult to change back.  But the next
 window revealed a huge, fat, panda, snoring loudly enough that she
 could hear it from here, and she was saved the trouble.

Sarah: quick someone call the zoo.  we'll take care of the 'genma
problem' right away.

        "Hey, Pop," Ranma called, rapping on the window.  The panda either
didn't hear her or pretended not to.  Scowling, Ranma forced it open
and jumped inside.  She found the bathroom and splashed herself with
hot water, then filled a cup and poured it on his sleeping father.
"Wake up, Pop.  I need to talk to you."
        "What is it, boy?" Genma said, pulling his clothes out of nowhere
and putting them on instantly.  "Why are you not with your wife?"

Sarah: humm it seems vaguely out of place to add something like this in
what has been a very serious fic.

Eric: *nods*

        "Listen, old man," Ranma said.  "When are we going to leave?"

Sarah: dont beat around the bush Ranma.

        "What do you mean, son?"  Genma sounded irritated already, which was
not unusual but also not promising.
        "You know, leave.  Go off to continue our training, maybe look for a
cure.  Leave, like we always do."

Eric: oh no Ranma has begun to act like his father, he has no remorse.

Sarah: yeah its sad that he would want to leave like that.

         Genma stood now, and there was a hint of regret in his voice.
"We're not going to leave," he said.
        Oh gods, Ranma thought.  The wedding.  The marriage.  He had
supported the marriage, forced it on her.  "Not ever?" he said, his
stomach turning.

Sarah: oh sure NOW you feel remorse.  

Eric: boy powerblast the boy will you?

        "You have a responsibility to your wife, boy.  If you have any honor
or respect for your family name, you will uphold it."

Sarah: oh please Genma get off that high horse.

        "I can't do that," Ranma said.  "I don't want to do that.  I'm
sixteen!"

Eric: boy if you only saw the line of guys that Akane has waiting for
her.

        "What did you think it meant when you said 'I do,' boy?  You must!"
        "I didn't mean it!" Ranma practically shouted.  "I thought it was a
sham, I thought we would use it to bum a couple of meals and go,
leave her behind!  It's not like I've never been engaged before."

Sarah: oh you're a cold one Ranma.  I dont like you in this one at all. 
*glows green with power*

        "We will stay here!" Genma shouted.  "And you will show respect to

Eric: genma you dont deserve respect.  Lemme think here is there a
character I like in this one yet?

me, show respect to your father-in-law, and show respect to your
wife!"
        "Screw you, old man!" Ranma exclaimed, slamming his fist into
Genma's gut twice and his face once before the older man could
respond.  "My life is ruined!"

Sarah: *powerblasts the past few pages* That'll teach you Ranma!

Eric: boy is Ranma being rather selfish here.

Sarah: and he's beating on Genma, therefore he's showing signs of
intelligence.

        Ranma took a step towards his father, his fists shaking with rage,
before turning and jumping out the window, into the rain.  The sudden
shock of the curse disrupted his balance, and he was barely able to
grab onto the balcony to prevent himself from falling.

Sarah: fall damn you and stop ruining poor akane's life!  she deserves
better than an idiot like you!

Eric: couldn't agree more.

        After a minute Genma rose and knocked on the door to the room across
the hall.  "Tendo?" he said.
        "Yes?"
        "I think perhaps we should get back to the dojo earlier than we
planned.  Things may not be going as well as we had hoped."

Eric: you think?

Sarah: what made you think they would work out, they're only 16. did you
think they would be grateful?

Eric: this fic is making me mad.  Mind you its good, but its still
making me mad!

 

          Akane was concentrating.  She gazed at the cinderblock before her,
  studying its square lines and its craggy surface, searching for the
  best way to effect its destruction.  She concentrated to distract

Sarah: here i'll lend you my power, that'll take care of the cinder
block AND Ranma for you.

  herself, because she did not wish to have time to consider the ruin
  the last two days had made of her life.  It wasn't working
  particularly well.

Sarah: humph.

         When Ranma and his father, well, Ranma and her panda, as it had
been, had first arrived, Akane had felt sorry for her.  She had even
 considered asking the girl to spar.  Of course, then the panda had
 run into the kitchen -- it was strange, she thought, that he had
 known where it was -- and splashed himself with hot water.  Things

Sarah: yes strange indeed.  I'm beginning to like only Akane and Kasumi
in this one and kasumi's borderline.

Eric: she hasnt really shown a big part yet though so you never know.

 had gone downhill from there.  Her father had immediately brought up
 the promised engagement and Genma had suggested that a wedding take
 place immediately.  Her father had loved that idea, of course, and

Sarah: akane should've slugged him right then and there.

 for no reason that she could understand Ranma had gone along.  At
 least Nabiki had been on her side; Kasumi had just stood there
 smiling.

Sarah: okay Kasumi just went off the list of likeable characters, lets
see what Nabiki's reasons were.

Eric: *nod*

        She was going to kill her father, she had decided.  And

Sarah: good for you girl... lemme fetch you an anvil and a book on how
to make it look like an accident.

 Ranma, for supporting the wedding when she had made it clear she
 wanted nothing of the sort, and his father, and her sisters, for
 volunteering her for this torture. She would stand over them, blood

Eric: i thought Nabiki had protested.

Sarah: i really feel sorry for her in this one.

 dripping from her hands, an unholy smile on her face, her pale golden
 wedding band shoved up Ranma's ass.  "Enjoy that, pervert?" she would
 say.

Sarah: yes violence. do it! do it! no would convict you, no one, do you
hear me? they'll give you a flipping medal!  do it do it!

Eric: humm you're losing it you know.

Sarah: do it!

        Akane swung her hand down with as much force as she could
 muster, crushing the fantasy along with the cinderblock.

Sarah: damn.

         "Akane?"  Kasumi's voice was a surprise, but Akane was too tired to
react immediately.
        "Hi, Kasumi," she said weakly, giving a little wave.  "What are you
doing back already?"

Eric: from hate to like in one step.

        Kasumi approached the younger girl quickly, concern evident on her
face.  "You look awful, Akane," she said.  "Come let me take a look
at you."

Sarah: oh what do you care? you supported this mess.

         "I'm fine," Akane protested, but she knew better than to
expect she could keep her eldest sister away.
        Kasumi put her hand on Akane's brow.  "No fever," she said, "but --"

Eric: what is kasumi clueless or something?

 Her eyes narrowed.  Kasumi brushed her sister's hair back, frowning
slightly.  "Akane," she said, "have you been crying?"

Sarah: oh no, i only got married to someone i dont even know last
night.  Really i'm find perfectly happy.  couldn't be better.  Her hold
this stick of dynamite for me please?  What oh its representative of my
life and i wanted you there when it blows!

        Akane almost laughed, the question was so ludicrous.  "What did you
think?  I would just be happy about being forced into a marriage?
Maybe you did think that.  You volunteered me."

Eric: thats right you tell her!

        Kasumi frowned seriously now, a sign of extreme disapproval.  "I
wasn't trying to hurt you, Akane."

Eric: you thought she was doing you a favor?

        "So what were you trying to do?  Make sure Dr. Tofu chooses you?"
Kasumi blinked.  "You did a pretty damn good job of that!  My life is
over because of you!"  Akane backed out of the dojo, her face
contorted in anger and sadness.  As soon as Kasumi was out of sight,
she turned and ran up to her room to cry.  The sight of Ranma's
bedding on the floor only brought a new wave of tears.

Eric: throw it out the window!

        Before long there was a knock at the door.  Akane could guess who it
was.  "What do you want?"
        "To talk."
        Akane sighed.  "Come in." The door opened slowly, more slowly than
Akane would have imagined possible.  Kasumi quietly stepped inside
the room and carefully pulled the door shut.  She took a moment to
collect her thoughts before speaking.  "I didn't realize you would
resent me this much.  I guess I should have expected it."  Akane said
nothing.  "I'm sorry I pushed you into the marriage instead of
letting him decide, Akane.  I guess I was afraid."

Sarah: oh nice time for rethinking it.  sheez.

        The bedspread tossed and turned under Akane's fitful hand.  "Thank
you," she said; slowly, as if the words were being pulled from a
vise.  "I forgive you."

Sarah: see everyone, Akane has a much kinder heart then people give her
credit for!

        "That's not the only thing that was bothering you, was it?"  Kasumi
saw an affirmative in the reticent silence.  She  gracefully sat next
to Akane, taking her hand.  "Tell me what's wrong."

Eric: dont ask... really Sarah, will just launch into another tirade.

        Akane turned away.  "I don't want to talk about it."
        "I really think you should.  It would make you feel better."
        With a sigh, Akane hung her head.  "It's just that -- my life is
over, like I said," she began.
        "Of course it's not," Kasumi said.

Sarah: uhh yes it is.

        "It is!" Akane insisted.  "Look at all things I'll never get to do."
        "You can do anything you want, Akane."

Sarah: yes and you can share them with that insensitive jerk i helped
you get married to last night.

        "I can't!  Kasumi, I have never been on a real date.  Not once.
Now, I never will.  I'm never going to fall in love, or get engaged,
and I'm never going to be independent and I'm never going to be
free!"

Sarah: you tell her.

        "Some girls would relish the security," Kasumi said.

Sarah: and some girls would be stifled and such an early age.  Think
kasumi i know you're dense in this one but i would think even you could
grasp that!

        "I can take care of myself," Akane said sharply.  "And there's other
stuff, too.  I can't deal with being married!  I mean, what am I
going to do if he wants to, you know."  Akane gestured miserably.

Sarah: here use this cattle prod... you can stick up his ass.

Eric: not much subtlety are you?

Sarah: you're talking to a girl that powerblasts you on a regular
basis.  Does that sound subtle to you?

        "I'm sure he'll understand if you have reservations," Kasumi said.
"He seems like a nice boy."

Sarah: oh yes the brief three minute conversation we had with him
conveyed to me a general feeling of goodnaturedness.

        "He's not even a boy!" Akane exclaimed.  "Besides, he didn't say a
word to me all day yesterday!"
        "Did you try to talk to him?"
        Akane froze, her lips moving soundlessly.

Sarah: dont you dare back down.

        "Most people tend to act friendliest to someone who's friendly
themselves," Kasumi said.
        "Well, no, I guess I didn't, but -- "

Sarah: she's just cornballing you!  she just doesnt want to accept
responsibility.

        "I would say you have to learn to talk to him if you want things to
ever get better."

Sarah: you could just run away and never look back.  You're being
awfully quiet Eric.

Eric: i have nothign to say.  you're doing all the talking and well
donig a damn fine running commentary.

         "But look what he did to me," Akane finished lamely.

Sarah: no not lamely.  you have EVERY right to be angry.

        "I just think you should concentrate on making the future better,"
Kasumi said.

Sarah: even if its one you didnt pick?

        "I don't know if I can do that," Akane said, resting
her head in Kasumi's lap, her voice trembling.
        "Please, Akane," Kasumi said.  "It's for the best.  Trust me."

Sarah: why should she?

        "I'll try," Akane said.  "I'll try."  Kasumi gathered her into a
warm hug, and Akane began to cry softly.  "Thank you," Kasumi said.

Eric: two paragraphs here.

        She smoothed Akane's hair and gently pulled up her sibling's head to
face her.  "I made some breakfast," she said.  "Would you like some?"

Sarah: only if you cooked the rest of the family.

        Akane started to shake her head, but her growling stomach
interrupted her.  She giggled despite herself.  "How do you do it,
Kasumi?" she said, wonderment in her voice.  "How do you always know
what's right?"

Sarah: she doesnt! she's being stupid!

        "Mother taught me," Kasumi said distantly, rising to fetch food for
her surrogate child.

Sarah: well then either you didnt listen very well or she wasnt a very
good mother.
 

         Ranma came back to the Dojo because she was hungry.  She had walked
 the streets of Nerima for more than two hours after speaking with her
 father, but it hadn't made her thoughts any clearer.  She was
 married, to a girl who hated her, no less.  It looked like there was
 no getting out of it, either.  Her pop had suddenly discovered a
 sense of honor, and no matter what her pride told her, Ranma didn't
 think she could function without the old man.  Finally the siren call
 of her stomach had become stronger than the urge to stay away from
 her wife, and she had made her way back to the Tendo home.

Eric: i like some of the imagery in this paragraph.

        Ranma  didn't want to disturb anyone, so she crawled in the kitchen
window.  Unfortunately, Kasumi was standing there; doing the dishes,

Sarah: oh yes no one is ever in the kitchen.

it looked like.  "Hello?" Ranma tried.
        "Oh my!" Kasumi exclaimed, dropping a plate to the floor with a
crash.
        "Sorry!" Ranma said quickly, leaping to Kasumi's aide.  "Are
you okay?"

Sarah: what does he care, he's the one who wanted to ditch Akane.

        Kasumi blushed.  "I'm fine, Ranma," she said.  "You just startled
me."  Turning, she studied the newcomer.  "Would you like some hot
water?"
        "Sure," Ranma said.  "Thanks."   Tapping her feet, the
redhead smiled nervously.  "Uh, do you have anything to eat left?"

Eric: oh redhead...*sniff*

Sarah: oh jeez stop it.  we're busy on this fic here.

        Kasumi smiled.  "There's plenty.  Just let me put this pot on to
warm up, and I'll get some for you, okay?"
        "Great!" Ranma said.  She waited impatiently for Kasumi to hand her
first the pot, and then a plate piled high..  Ranma leapt into the

Eric: a plate piled high with what?

food with abandon, scooping it into his mouth faster then he could
chew.
        A voice rang out of the hall.  "Hello?"
        "Oh my," Kasumi said.  "It's father.  I had better start on lunch if
everyone's going to be here."  She raised her voice.  "Hello,
father!"
        Ranma stood and, continuing to eat, found his father-in-law.  Soun
stood with two large bags in his hands, framed by Genma in his panda
form and a disgruntled looking Nabiki.  They all looked damp.
"Growlf," Genma said.

Sarah: wheres a good brick when you need one.

        "Son-in-law!" Soun shouted, dropping the bags and running to embrace
Ranma.

Sarah: gods thats disgusting.

        "Really, Daddy," Nabiki said.  She shot Ranma a nasty look,
grabbed one of the bags and trudged up the stairs.

Sarah: ah good i hope Nabiki has retained some sense of intelligence.

        "Hello, Mr. Tendo," Ranma said, attempting to fend the older man off
without putting down his plate or stopping eating.

Eric: god is he one minded.

        Seeing that his attempts were being rejected, Soun frowned and
settled for patting Ranma's shoulder. "Akane!" he called.  "Akane,
come down here."
        "Daddy?" Akane's voice floated down the stairs.  "What are you doing
back?"

Sarah: and what did i do with that gun i was going to use on you.

        "He was afraid you two were having too much wedded bliss,"
Nabiki answered from the bathroom.
        Kasumi walked into the room with a pot of warm water and handed it
to Genma, who grunted his thanks before pouring it on himself.
"Ranma," he said, changing the subject none too smoothly, "tomorrow
you must begin to attend school."

Sarah: oh yeah sure school, act like nothigns happened.

        "Akane and Nabiki go to Furinkan High School," Soun said.  "I'll
walk you there tomorrow morning, since we have to register Akane's
name change anyway."
        "What!" Ranma said.  "No way I'm going to school."
         The house shook and the stairs rattled as Akane ran down to
confront her father.  "What name change?" she spit out, her face
livid.  Ranma didn't think she had even noticed that he was standing
there.

Sarah: oh grow up Ranma.

        "To your married name, of course," Soun said.

Sarah: slug him.

Eric: into next week if at all possible.

        "I'm definitely not going to school," Ranma said, trying and failing
to attract some attention.  His father glared at him momentarily.
        "But you don't have to tell them!" Akane was saying.  She stared at
her father with a mixture of betrayal, hope, and sadness.  He shook
his head firmly, and Akane turned and ran up the stairs.
        "Oh my," Kasumi said, shaking her head.

Sarah: what are you shaking you're head at?  its not your life thats
screwed up!
 

         This is getting silly, Akane reflected as she cried into her
pillow.  This was the fourth time today she had run up to her room to
cry.  She hadn't done it once yesterday, and she didn't consider
herself to be naturally weepy.  She generally preferred, well, a much
more active response to her problems.  But she couldn't decide who to
 fight, because everyone was against her, and everything was so hard,
 and she knew it was only going to get harder.  She had decided that
 Kasumi was right, that she needed to make some effort to talk to
 Ranma, about anything, really.  After all, she thought bitterly,
 we've got the same name now.

Sarah: oh please, you know for as much blame as you put on everyone
else, you allowed the marriage to happen you know.

        She didn't notice Nabiki quietly watching her begin to cry even
harder.

Sarah: Nabiki please talk some sense into her.
 

 The middle Tendo sister sighed as she walked into the kitchen.
 Kasumi was happily preparing lunch, humming a little tune.  Nabiki
 didn't recognize it.  She leaned provocatively against the
 refrigerator and sighed again.  "Akane doesn't seem very happy, does
 she, Kasumi," she said.  It was not a question.

Sarah: ahh nabiki ever the intelligent one that all western women can
rely to not offend their sensibilities.

        "I suppose not," Kasumi said, "but I'm sure she'll learn to deal
with it.  She's a very strong girl."
        "He's not going to be good for her," Nabiki said.

Eric: good i like that nabiki retains some sense of her sister's well
being.

        They could both hear their fathers laughing uproarously in an
adjacent room.  "You know, Saotome, I'm glad we married them right
away," their father said.  "A marriage is different from an
engagement.  You can't run away from it, you can't pretend it's not
there, you can't deny it.  Think about all the whining we won't have
to listen to."

Sarah: oh shut up... if i could jump into this fic right now....

        "Very true, Tendo.  It was certainly the best thing to do."

Eric: grr this family..

        Nabiki scowled and turned to her sister.  "I have one thing to say
to that."
         "Hmm?"
        "Annullment."
        "Oh my."

Sarah: YES!!!!!
 

         Akane Saotome walked into the living room quietly.  Ranma Saotome
lay alone on the floor, staring at the TV.  Akane's hand rested on a
chair; she rocked on the balls of her feet.  Taking a deep breath,
she spoke.  "Ranma, you might want to go to bed early," she said.
"We've got school tomorrow."
         Ranma looked up at her.  "Thanks," he said.

Sarah: well i hope it doesnt work out.. really.

 

End part 1

This will probably extend to no more than five parts.  I'm not
interested in retelling the whole story of Ranma 1/2, but I will try
to deal with all the most important characters.  The real focus of
this series will be the relationship between Ranma and Akane,
though, as their marriage both forces them apart and forces
them together.  Please send C&C, especially about characterization
and dialogue -- does it sound like something anyone might actually
say?

Sarah: okay several things first of all.  I loved it.

Eric: so did i.  I mean it pissed me off to no end but i liked it.  You
characterization are well within character and everything, very nicely
done.  I look forward to the rest.

Sarah: so do I, *glows green with immense power building up to a
detonation the likes of which she has never attempted before* BUT YOU
BETTER NOT PUT THOSE TWO TOGETHER OR ELSE!!!!!

Eric: one of the major problems of the story though is that its truly
hard to sympathize with most of the characters. 

Sarah: *still glowing very brightly* agreed, i mean if i could hop into
this fic i would powerblast everything in sight.  I hate most of the
characters, i only sympathize with Akane and that only slightly so
because she refuses to accept any responsibility on her part.  I love
Nabiki though.

Eric: anyways great job! I loved it!

Sarah: until next time, cuz its getting late and i have feeling that 5
of these little C&C's in one day is weary for anyone.


 

 Thanks for reading.

Thomas Schmidt
Tschmidt@trader.com

Ranma 1/2 belongs to Rumiko Takhasi, Viz Communications, and a lot of
other people who are not me.

-- 
"I always hated stories that ended poorly. I
always felt cheated.  But you can't feel cheated
forever.  And then she woke up...
I suppose there are worse endings."
--Rose Walker, Lost Hearts
http://www.erols.com/eda104/