Okay, this story's ready for RAAC...I think.


Jeffrey "OneShot" Wong

Ranma 1/2: Ranma plays Street Fighter II




(Ranma is at a local arcade with Ryoga. They are standing at the front 
entrance)

Ranma:Man, I don't understand why  we hafta come to the arcades with 
Akane and her friends. I wish Happousei would give up his ways.

Ryoga:I know.

Ranma:Man, where the hell is she. She said she was gonna be here around 
now.

Ryoga:Maybe they're already inside.

Ranma:Let's go check.

(They enter. The gameroom is crowded and very noisy. Ranma and Ryoga 
have problems maneuvering their way through the crowd people)

Ryoga:Man, there sure are a lot of games in here.

Ranma:(Looks at street fighter)Hey, Ryoga, c'mere.

Ryoga:What?(Walks over to Ranma)What do you want? We should be looking 
for Akane.

Ranma:Look at that character, he's throwing ki-blasts just like us.

Ryoga:(Reads name)Ken? What kinda person with a name like Ken can throw 
ki-blasts like that?

Ranma:Well, look at that guy. That guy's named Ryu and he's throwing ki-
blasts.

Ryoga:Man, look at all those buttons. I can't believe there's six of 
them nowadays.

Ranma:I know whatcha mean.(Continues to look at screen)Guile? Man, what 
kinda name is that? I think that was a vocabulary word I got in my 
foreign language class, English.

Ryoga:Hey, look at that. He's huge. Z-Zangeif? Sounds Russian to me.

Ranma:Ya wanna give it a try?

Ryoga:I guess.

(Ranma and Ryoga put in their coins)

Ranma:Hm...'Choose a character'?. I guess I pick this guy with the white 
dogi.

Ryoga:Hey, I want him.

Ranma:(Laughs)Too late. I got him. 

Rygoa:Hey, how come I can't choose him? I want him also.

Ranma:Why not pick that guy with the blond hair? He looks like he's the 
same as this Ryu guy.

Ryoga:Guile? That guy don't look like he even know martial arts.

Ranma:No. Not him, that...'Ken' person.

Ryoga:I don't want him. He looks like an American. I want to pick a 
Japanese.

Ranma:Hey, how 'bout that sumo wrestler over there by that cute looking 
Chinese girl? 'E. Honda'?(Laughs)Maybe I should pick him. Afterall, you 
did fight a sumo wrestler once...well, more like a sumo pig.

Ryoga:(Sarcastic)Ha ha, very funny.

Ranma:Hey, it looks like the time ran out. I guess you have 'Ken'.

Ryoga:Damn, I want Ryu.

Ranma:Quit complain' the round's 'bout to start.

Ryoga:Well, whatever. Prepare to die Ranma. My 'Ken' will beat your 
'Ryu'

Ranma:In your dreams. I'm gonna throw one of 'em Mouko Takabisha at ya. 

Ryoga:Take that! And that!

Ranma:Hey, how come I can't throw it. How come he doesn't throw his ki-
blast?

(Ranma starts button smashing and shaking the joystick as his 'Ryu' is 
near the brink of death)

Ranma:Ha ha, there's that ki-blast. What did he say? 

Ryoga:I think he said 'Hakodan' like what I say.

Ranma:So where's the 'Shi Shi' that supposed to come before sayin' that? 

Ryoga:I don't know.

Ranma:Ha, I threw that ki-blast again. Take that!!!

Ryoga:(Character blocks)Cool, I can block those blasts. All I hafta do 
is pull back on the joystick.

Ranma:What?! How can he block a ki-blast?

Ryoga:(Smashes buttons)How'd you do that? How you throw that 'Hakodan'?

Ranma:I don't know.

Ryoga:What the hell is that? 'Shoryuken'?

Ranma:Hey, that looks a bit like my 'Hiyru ShotenHa', except without the 
spiraling wind and that he leaps into the air. Cool. I wonder if 'Ryu' 
has something like that.(Smashes buttons)Damn, how'd you do that?

Ryoga:I don't know. Ha! Take that! Eat ki-blasts! 

Ranma:Ha. I'm blocking them. That's so cool. 'Ryu' is blocking those ki-
blasts.

Ryoga:What the hell's that? 'Tatsumakisenpuu Kyaku'? How did he do that? 
How'd my character do that? 

Ranma:Cool, I can block that also. Man, this games cool. Ha. Gotcha good 
right there.

Ryoga:Oh man, cool, they're puking blood and vomit.

Ranma:Man, this game's pretty realistic. 

Ryoga:Yeah, it has ki-blasts.

Ranma:Take that!!! Damn, I missed. Hey listen, they're saying 'Hadoken' 
not 'Hakodan'.

Ryoga:It sounded like that. Oh well.

Ranma:Damn, that sucks, you just died.

Ryoga:Hrmph, that was a lucky shot.

Ranma:(Laughs)Even your character can't beat mine.

Ryoga:Shut up, Ranma! There's still another round.

Ranma:There's another one?! Hey, that's cheap, you just hit my character 
while I was away from the machine. 

Ryoga:That's your fault. Ha. Look at that. I just took off half your 
entire energy bar.

Ranma:You'll pay for that. Take that.

Ryoga:Whoa!!! That's so cool.

Ranma:Yeah. Their ki-blasts just canceled each other out, just like in 
real life. Man, this game's so real is scary.

Ryoga:Hey, how'd you throw me like that?

Ranma:I don't know. I just walked right up to your character and hit 
this button. Ha, he did it again!!!(Laughs)

Ryoga:That's cheap. You should let me throw your character. I wasn't 
expecting that.

Ranma:That's your fault. Besides, you were the one who attack my 
character while I was away from the machine.

Ryoga:Argh!!! I'm losing. 

Ranma:Ha. I don't think you're gonna survive another one of my ki-
blasts, even if you do block it. You're gonna lose.

Ryoga:No I'm not. I'm still gonna win.

Ranma:And how do you expect to do that. I have half my energy bar 
remaining.

Ryoga:By doin' this.

(Ryoga grabs Ranma and shoulder throws him into a nearby machine. He 
then quickly has his character pummel Ranma's 'Ryu' to death before 
Ranma managed to get back in time. Ha! I win!!!

Ranma:That's low. I can't believe you did that. How low can you get?

Ryoga:Ha. I still won anyway. That's all that counts.

Ranma:Well, whatever, you're not gonna get me with that again.

(The third round starts)

Ranma:Take that. Eat my jumpkick!!!

Ryoga:Ha. I blocked it. Eat my heel kick.

Ranma:Ha. You totally whiffed on that kick. All I had to do was make him 
duck.

Ryoga:Take that! And that! And that!

Ranma:You're horrible, P-chan. I'm blocking everything.

Ryoga:(Fuming)Don't call me P-chan.

Ranma:Sure. Whatever you say, P-chan.

Ryoga:You shut up while I pummel your 'Ryu' character.

Ranma:And how do you expect to pummel him when he's blocking everything.

Ryoga:Like this!(Reaches over and shoves Ranma's joystick)Ha! Gotcha 
with that one.

Ranma:Oh yeah! Take that(Shoves Ryoga away)Take that! And that!!!

Ryoga:Why you!!!(Continues smashing buttons)

Ranma:Man, you suck, P-chan.

Ryoga:Shut up! And stop calling me P-chan.

Ranma:Ha. I win. You lost. I'm the winner. You're the loser.

Ryoga:That's because you cheated.

Ranma:Only because you cheated first.

Ryoga:I challenge you to a rematch.

Ranma:I don't' want to beat up someone like you in this game. I want a 
challenge.

Ryoga:Why you!!! Take that(Kicks at Ranma)

Ranma:Hey, lighten up, P-chan, I was just joking.

Ryoga:Who're you calling P-chan!!! Hadokan!!!

Ranma:Shoryuken!!!

(Nothing happens)

Ryoga:Hey, how come nothing happened?

Ranma:Beats me.

Ryoga:That sucks. 

Ranma:Damn, I wish it work. I wouldn't mind learning new techniques this 
way. It sure beats training with that old crone.

Ryoga:I know what you mean.

Ranma:Fine, let's have a rematch.

Ryoga:I'm definitely gonna win this game. I lost because I picked an 
American. I'm gonna pick that sumo wrestler.(Picks E. Honda)

(Round starts. Ranma and Ryoga start button smashing)

Ranma:Oh cool. That sumo guy knows how to do my 'Kashuu Tenshin 
Amaguriken'. 

Ryoga:C'mon!! I don't want to do that!! I want him to do a 'Bakusai 
Tenketsu', and he ain't doing it. What a gyp!

(Akane and her friends show up at the arcade now. Akane notices Ranma 
and Ryoga playing a game and walks up to them)

Akane:Ranma? Ryoga? What are you doing here?

Ryoga:A-Akane.

Ranma:We came here to save ya. We heard Happousei's been running around 
lookin' for ya. That's all.(turns back to game)Ha!!! Eat ki-blast!!!

Akane:What're you playing?

Ranma:(Points at title)Read the title. Jeez.(Continues playing)

Ryoga:Hey, that's no way to be talking to Akane like that.

Ranma:(Chuckles)I suggest you get back to what you're doing. My 'Ryu' is 
kickin' your 'Ken's' butt.

Ryoga:Hey, no fair.(Starts button smashing)Damn, I lost again.

Ranma:You see. I told you you're gonna lose. Now, just one more round)

(Akane gazes over their shoulder and watches as Ryoga's 'Ken' loses to 
Ranma's 'Ryu')

Ranma:Ha. You stink.

Ryoga:You take that back!!! I don't stink!!! 

Ranma:Of course you stink. You lost to me two games already. You're no 
challenge.

Akane:Hey, that looks like fun. Can I try?

Ranma:You? 

Akane:Yeah, what's wrong with that?

Ranma: Cause this is a man's game. Girls shouldn't be playing games like 
this(Imitating girl)Besides, you might break a nail hitting those 
buttons.

Ryoga:Ranma!!! You take that back!!!

Akane:It's okay Ryoga. I can handle this(Glares at Ranma)You know what I 
think? I think you're scared to lose to me.

Ranma:You? In your dreams. You're clumsy. This requires coordination, 
which you don't have. 

Akane:What did you say?!

Ranma:This game requires coordin-

Akane:Baka!!!!

(Akane mallets Ranma. He is sent flying across the room, smashing into a 
video game.)

Akane:(Turns toward Ryoga)Hey, Ryoga, can you show me how to play?

Ryoga:Y-you w-want me to t-teach you?

Akane:Well, I never tried this game before. And it looks like 
fun(Smiles)

(Ryoga looks at screen.)\

Ryoga:I guess so. Here, take Ranma's 'Ryu'. I'll enter as a challenger.

Akane:Okay.(Looks at screen)Who're all those people?

Ryoga:I have to choose a character.(Starts scrolling through characters) 
I don't know who to choose. Maybe I'll choose this green alien looking 
guy...'Blanka'

Akane:Hey, wait a minute. Scroll back to that girl.

Ryoga:You mean her?

Akane:Wow, she's kinda pretty.

Ryoga:(Thinking)Not as pretty as you Akane(Talks)Um..if you say so.

Akane:Here. Let's switch. I wanna try her out.

Ryoga:Okay.

(Ryoga and Akane switch sides. Akane picks 'Chun Li'. The round starts. 
By now, Ranma is conscious and walks up to them)

Ranma:Hey, that's my game!!!(Shoves Ryoga)Give that back.

Ryoga:Ranma!!! How dare you push me!!!

Akane:Hey, cool, I just made this girl kick your 'Ryu' in the head.

Ranma:(looks at screen)Hey, who's the cute looking girl?

Akane:What?

Ranma:(Points toward Chun Li')Her. She's kinda cute. Are you playing 
her?

Akane:Yeah. Why?

Ranma:(Chuckles)Are you sure? I don't think a tomboy like you should be 
playing a babe like her.

Akane:Baka!!!

(Akane mallets Ranma again. He falls to the ground unconscious)

Akane:Hey, Ryoga, what are you waiting for? Aren't you going to attack 
my character?

Ryoga:What?(Thinking)How in the world am I going to be able to do this? 
I can't bring myself to make my 'Ryu' attack Akane's 'Chun Li'. I can't.

Akane:Hey, c'mon. Do something. Make him attack her.

Ryoga:I-I can't. 

Akane:Why not?

Ranma:(Now conscious)Cause he's a wimp. That's why. He can't bring 
himself to attack your character.

Ryoga:That's not true!!! I'm not a wimp!!!

Ranma:(Wryly)Okay, fine. Then attack back. Fight back. Have him use one 
of his ki-blasts...

Ryoga:You want me to what?!

Ranma:Use one of those k-blasts.

Ryoga:But...it'll probably kill 'Chun Li'

Ranma:Well, we'll never know unless we try.

Akane:C'mon. Show me his ki-blast.

Ryoga:I-I can't.

Ranma:(Shoves Ryoga away)Wimp. Fine. I'll do it.(Smashes buttons)I think 
I know how to do it. 

('Ryu' throws a ki-blast at 'Chun Li' and Akane was unable to make her 
character block it.)

Ryoga:Ranma!!! How dare you attack Akane's character!!!!

Ranma:What? Get a grip on yourself!!! It's only a game!!!

Akane:But look. She survived it.

Ranma:Well, that's pretty odd. She's a girl and there's no chance she 
would survive something like that, especially if she didn't block it.

Akane:What did you say?

Ranma:Hm...if she's capable of surviving that ki-blast, she'll probably 
be a good sparring partner to have, right?

Akane:Huh?

Ranma:Well, it's not everyday you meet someone as cute and strong as 
this 'Chun Li'. 

Ryoga:And what about Akane?(Sarcastically) Isn't she supposed to be your 
sparring partner?

Ranma:Well, I wouldn't mind having 'Chun Li' for a partner. Unlike 
Akane, she's cute and strong. Akane's just strong...like an ox.

Ryoga:You take that back!!!

Akane:Baka!!!

(Mallets Ranma yet again. At that moment, Ukyo happens to show up)

Ukyo:Hey, what are you guys doing here?

Akane:Us? What about you? I thought you were working.

Ukyo:I was just making a delivery and I saw you through the 
window.(Looks at the screen)whatcha playing?

Akane:Street Fighter 2.

Ukyo:(Looks at screen)Hey, that guy in the white dogi looks cute.

Akane:I know what you mean.

Ryoga:Akane, y-you t-think he's cute?

Akane:(Smiles teasingly)He's cute, but not as cute as you.

(Ryoga nosebleeds and falls over unconscious)

Ukyo:(Sighs)What a wimp.

Akane:Just leave him alone. He's just shy.

(Ukyo notices Ranma now conscious, getting up off the floor nearby the 
game)

Ukyo:Ranma?

Ranma:Ukyo? Erk.

(Ukyo glomps onto Ranma)

Ukyo:How nice to meet you here...

Akane:Hrph...someone better do something or 'Ryu' going to lose the 
round.

Ranma:What? He's still alive? Man, you must be bad that you can't defeat 
him even when I'm not controlling him.

Akane:Ranma!!!!

Ranma:(Walks over to game and starts button smashing)Well, that means I 
still have a chance.

('Ryu', through pure luck, wins)

Ranma:(Laughs)I won!!! How on earth can you lose!? 

Akane:...............

Ranma:I told you this is a man's game.(Laughs some more)

Ukyo:What's he talking about?

Akane:Nothing.

Ranma:(Turns to face Ukyo)I was just tellin' her that this is a man's 
game.

Ukyo:Well, if it's a man's game, then how come Akane's character is 
giving you character a whooping.

(Ranma realizes that while his back was to the game, Akane was using the 
opportunity to get in some free shots)

Ranma:Hey, that's cheap!!! I'll get you for that!!! Eat revised Hiyru 
ShotenHa's!!!

Ukyo:Eat what?

Ranma:(Still playing)Revised Hiyru ShotenHa's. This 'Ryu' guy keeps 
shoutin' 'Shoryuken' but it looks like a variation of my own technique. 
All that's missing is the wind.

Akane:(Smiles)Well, that's pretty useless. It'll never connect since my 
'Chun Li' is halfway across the screen.

Ranma:Then I guess I gotta use 'em ki-blasts.

('Ryu' throws his 'Hadoken')

Ranma:'Hadoken'!!!! 'Hadoken'!!!!

Ukyo:Jeez, you're sure gettin' into the game.

Ranma:Um...well...I was...um...

(Ranma gets distracted by Ukyo's comments and loses the round)

Akane:Hey, did you see that? I just made her do some weird looking 
lightning kicks.

Ranma:hey, that was cheap. 

Akane:From the look of things, everything seems cheap to you.

Ranma:Well, yeah. If you hit me, then it must be a cheap move.(Chuckles)

Ryoga:(Now conscious)You take that back!!!

Ranma:Go to sleep(Punts Ryoga to other side of the room)I have a 'Chun 
Li' to beat up.

Akane:(Fuming)How dare you hit Ryoga like that!!!

(Akane punts Ranma across the room)

Ukyo:Man, he had that coming(Stepping up next to Akane)Well, now that 
Ranma's not here, what do we do about that 'Ryu' guy? He's just standing 
there.

Akane:I don't' know. How about you take control of him?

Ukyo:Me? I never played one of these before.

Akane:Neither have I. Just hit the buttons. 

Ukyo:Um..okay(Starts buttons smashing)Hey cool. This is kinda easy.

Akane:See, nothing to it.

Ukyo:Aw...I lost.

Akane:Play again. 

Ukyo:Okay.(Puts in money)Now what? What's this 'Choose your character'?

Akane:Just pick someone you want to use against my character.

Ukyo:Hey, how come I can't pick that girl? 

Akane:I dunno. I think it's because I picked her.

Ukyo:I want her. I don't want to play a male character. As you can tell, 
my 'Ryu' sure got his butt whooped.

Akane:Sorry.

Ukyo:(Scrolls through character)Hmm...that American guy with that weird 
haircut looks kinda cool 'Guile'. Man, he needs a haircut. I guess I'll 
pick him.

(Ukyo picks and the round starts., The two girls start button smashing)

Akane:Hey, how'd you do that? How'd you get him to throw that weird 
looking disk? What did he say, 'Sonic Boom'? 

Ukyo:I have no idea. I was just holding the joystick back to block those 
kicks of yours and when I noticed an opening I went in for an attack and 
that thing came out.

Akane:How come 'Chun Li' doesn't have a ki-blast. Why do all the guys 
have it? All I have is this lightning kick and I have to get close to 
make it connect. That's no fair.

Ukyo:(Smiling)Ha take that!!! Well, life seldom is, Akane. Take 
that...and that!!!

Ryoga:(Walking up to them)Where's Ranma?! He'll pay for that!!!

Ukyo:Somewhere around here, sugar. We're kinda busy to talk right now. 
Ha! Eat another one of my flying discs, Akane!!!

Ranma:(Walking up to them)Ukyo, now you're playing?

Ukyo:Well, you're character lost and-

Ranma:'Ryu' lost?! To 'Chun Li'?! How can a guy lose to a girl?!

Akane:I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that!!!(Continues playing)

Ryoga:Ranma!!! You'll-

Ranma:I know, "You'll pay for that". Sheesh. Can't you think of 
something else to say? Man, that's getting annoying.

Ryoga:................

Ranma:(Looks at screen)Who's winning?

Ukyo:I am. This 'Guile' character is pretty touch. He's got long sweeps.

Akane:Hey!!! How'd you throw me like that?! Your character just suplexed 
my character!!!

Ryoga:Hey, that looks just like the suplex I did on you when we were 
fighting up against the 'Golden Pair'.

Ranma:.................

Akane:Man, that was a good round. I almost lost that match.

Ranma:(Taps Ukyo's shoulder)Hey, Ukyo, can I take over?

Ukyo:Huh? Why?(Continues to play)

Ranma:I want a rematch. I want to pay her back.

Akane:Get with it. You lost.(Continues to play)

Ranma:(Getting angry)Hey, YOU were the one that sent me flying across 
the room. What you did was no fair.

Akane:(Looks at Ukyo for a moment)Well, life seldom is, Ranma.

Ranma:Well, I want a rematch.

Akane:What, so you can lose again?

(Ryoga bursts out in laughter)

Ranma:Shut up, Ryoga!(Turns to Akane)I'm not gonna lose this time 
around. I'm not gonna let you kick me somewhere.

Ryoga:(Smiles)Yeah. I'll do that(Cracks his knuckles)I'm not going to 
let you character beat up on Akane's character.

Akane:Ryoga, you'll really do that.

Ryoga:Well, um..y-yeah. O-of course I-I'll do that.

Akane:Thank you.

Ranma:Hey, that's not right!!! You can't do that!!!

Ukyo:Don't worry(Looks menacing at Ryoga)If Ryoga lays one finger on 
you, he'll have to answer to me.(Goes back to playing)

Ranma:Ha! I've got Ukyo here. Let's see you do somethin', Ryoga. Ha, you 
can't. Thanks Ucchan.

Ryoga:...................

Ukyo:Damn, I lost again.(Steps aside)Well, it's all yours.

Ranma:Good. Ha, Akane. I'm gonna pound your 'Chun Li' to the 
ground.(Puts coin in slot)

(Ranma goes to select 'Ryu' but Ryoga quickly reaches forward and taps 
one of Ranma's buttons)

Ranma:Arghhhh!!! What'd you do that for?!? You made me pick this ugly 
sumo wrestler, E. Honda!!!

Ryoga:Ha! Now there's no chance you could win.

Ukyo:Ryoga!!! How dare you!?!

Ryoga:Um...hold on there, Ukyo...

Ranma:Don't worry 'bout it, Ucchan. I'll beat Akane...even if I don't 
know how to use this character.

(The round starts and Ranma starts button smashing)

Akane:We'll see.(Buttons smashes)

Ranma:Awesome!!!! This guy knows that Kashuu Tenshin Amaguriken!!!

Akane:Ha! Look at him! He's just standing there. Those punches aren't 
going to hit her if she's all the way across the room.

(Akane makes 'Chun Li' jump over `E. Honda')

Ranma:(Smashing buttons)Hey!!! What the hell!!! Quit punching at turn 
around damnit!!! Turn around!!!!(Continues smashing buttons)

Ryoga:Man, 'Shun Li' just threw that sumo wrestler!!! I can't believe 
she just did that. That sumo wrestler looks like he weighs a ton.

Ranma:Well, she's probably as strong as an ox, like Akane here. 

Akane:What did you say?!

Ranma:Hee hee...gotcha. Better not get distracted again.

Ryoga:How dare you make that sumo wrestler hit Akane's 
character!!!(Grabs Ranma's pigtail and pulls him away from the 
machine)Now Akane, beat Ranma's character up while he's distra-Erk!!!

Ukyo:(Holding spatula planted over Ryoga face)I told you not to do that.

(Ryoga falls down to the floor unconscious)

Ranma:Thanks(Runs back to the machine)Man, you took off so much 
energy!!!!

Akane:Hee hee. One more hit and you're dead.

Ranma:Not if I can do something about it.

(Ranma picks up the arcade machine and carries it over toward a pole. He 
then places it down by the pole. It just so happen the pole is blocking 
Akane's side)

Ukyo:All right, Ranma!!!

Akane:Hey!!! I can't get to my joystick!!! That's no fair!!!

Ranma:(Smirks)Like you said, life seldom is...what are you doing!?

(Akane has pushed the arcade machine forward and flips it onto its back. 
She is now standing on top of the machine, smashing away at the buttons, 
hoping to finish off Ranma's characters)

Ranma:Oh no you don't!!!

(Ranma also steps onto of the machine and grabs Akane, lifting her into 
the air and placing her over his shoulder, where she's out of reach of 
her joystick)

Akane:Hey, let go of me!!!! Put me down!!!!

Ranma:(Still holding Akane over his shoulder)Ukyo, take control of my 
character and beat up Akane's character, while Akane's away from the 
machine.

(Ranma runs off toward the other side of the arcade room)

Ranma:If you manage to free yourself, it'll take some time for you to 
get back to your machine.

Akane:Let go of me, NOW!!!!(Plants a knee in Ranma's lower back)

(Ranma falls to the floor as Akane quickly rolls to her feet and runs 
toward the game)

Ranma:(Yelling)Ukyo, look out. Here she comes.(Gets up and runs toward 
game)

Ukyo:(Spatula in hand)I ain't letting you defeat Ranma's character. 
You're gonna hafta get past me first.

Akane:Out of the way!!! I'm not going to lose to some sumo wrestler.

(Ranma sprints by her and hops onto the game. There he proceeds to have 
his character pummel Akane's character)

Akane:Hey!!!!

(Ryoga, who was lying on the ground between Ranma and Ukyo, was now 
coming back out of unconsciousness)

Ryoga:(Getting up)Man, what hit me?

Akane:(Calling out)Ryoga, I need your help.

Ryoga:What is it, Akane?

Akane:(Points toward Ranma)You have to stop Ranma before he beats up my 
character!!!

Ryoga:(Turns toward Ranma)Ranma!!! Die!!!

(Ryoga leaps toward Ranma and tackles to off the machine. They both 
start rolling around on the ground, fighting for control)

Ranma:Hey, let go of me!!!

Ryoga:Never!!!

Akane:Good, hold him there while I go beat Ranma's character up!!!

Ukyo:Not while I'm still around.(In her battle stance)You're gonna have 
to get past me first.(Swings spatula)Take that!!!

(Akane manages to sidestep just in time. Ukyo's downward swing was so 
strong that the blade of the spatula got stuck into the floor. She tires 
to pull it loose, much to no avail)

Akane:Looks like you no long have a spatula.(Runs past Ukyo toward the 
game machine)

(Akane falls forward as Ukyo tackles her for behind, taking her out from 
her knees. Ukyo wraps her arms around Akane's legs)

Ukyo:I ain't letting you near that machine.

Akane:Let go!!!(Tries to make her way to the machine on her arms)

(At that moment Ranma manages to get Ryoga off him. He quickly gets up 
and runs toward the machine. He stops a moment to taunt Akane)

Ranma:All right, Ucchan. Just hold her there while I finish off her 
charac-oof!!!

(Ryoga tackles Ranma again. Together, they vie for control. At that 
moment, Shampoo enters the scene)

Shampoo:Nihao, what you doing?

Ranma:Shampoo, I need your help, get Ryoga off me. I can't move.

Shampoo:(Gets idea)If Ranma can't move, then Ranma can't run away. That 
mean Shampoo can kiss Ranma.(Smiles)

Akane:Don't you dare!!!

Ukyo:You leave my Ranchan alone!!!(Still holding Akane)

Shampoo:Shampoo no scared of Ukyo(Glomps onto Ranma)

Ranma:Argghhh!!! Let go of me, Shampoo!!! You too, Ryoga!!!

Ryoga:(Still holding onto Ranma)Not on your life.

Shampoo:Pigboy can leave. Shampoo want Ranma all to herself.

Ukyo:Her, you leave my Ranchan alone you hussy.(Lets go off Akane and 
goes to Ranma)If you think I'm sharing my Ranchan, you're sorely 
mistaken(Glomps onto Ranma)

(Ryoga, seeing Ranma's being held down by two girls, lets go and stands 
up)

Ryoga:Well, I guess Akane and I don't hafta worry about you 
anymore.(looks at Ranma)Hee hee.

Ranma:(Struggling to get free)Don't you dare touch Akane's controller.

Ryoga:And what are you going to do about it?!

Ranma:(Getting desperate)Ucchan, Shampoo, whichever one of you beats up 
Ryoga, I'll go out on a date with you.

Ukyo:Really?!

Shampoo:Aiyaa. Ranma really mean it?

Ranma:Yes, hurry!!!

(Ryoga had just enough time scream as he caught sight of two girl 
getting off Ranma and running toward him)

Ryoga:Argghhh!!!

(The girls start pummeling Ryoga. A cloud of dust from the fight forms)

Ranma:(Sitting upright and watching the fight)All right, get him good, 
do a `Hadoken' on him.oops. that only works in the gam-Erk.

(Akane is standing behind Ranma as her mallet reigns down on Ranma's 
head)

Akane:How dare you say something like that just to get the girls to stop 
Ryoga?!

Ranma:(Brushing off Akane's attack)Well, I had to do whatever I had to 
do. It's not like I'm really gonna go out with one of `em, Akane.

Akane:Well, I could care less if you go out. Hmph.

Ranma:(Realizes something)Oh!!! The game!!!(Runs toward the game)Ha ha, 
I'm gonna get there first.

Akane:Ranma!!!(Runs after him)

Kuno:(Showing out of nowhere)Akane Tendo, at last, I have found thee. 
For I have search high and low for thou-Erk!!!

(Akane punts Kuno into Ranma. Kuno is lying unconscious on top of Ranma)

Akane:Hee hee. You're stuck and I'm not!(Runs toward the game)

Ranma:Oh no I'm not

(Ranma reaches a hand out and grabs Akane's ankle, causing her to fall 
to the ground. Ranma keeps his grip tight as he pulls her to him. Once 
close enough, he hugs her tightly, keeping her from moving)

Ranma:Ha, if I can't move, neither will you(Holds her)

Akane:(Blushing)R-Ranma.

Ranma:(Realizes something)Hey, don't get the wrong idea. It's not like 
I'm huggin' you or nothin'. I jus' don't want ya to get to that game-
Erk.

(Akane plants a fist in Ranma's face)

Akane:Baka.(Gets up)

Ranma:I ain't lettin' ya get away that easy.

(Ranma reaches out his hand and grabs hold of Akane's ankle)

Akane:(Struggling against Ranma's hold)Let go of me!!!

Ranma:Not on your life!!!

(Happousei shows up out of nowhere)

Hapoousei:Akane, so you really were coming to the arcades. How 
sweet!!!(Lunges toward Akane)

Ranma:(Uses other hand to punch Happousei to other side of the 
room)Where'd you come from?!

Akane:Ugh, let go of me. Y-you're hurting me.

Ranma:I-I am? I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean it.(Lets go of Akane's ankle)

Akane:(Getting up)Thanks, sucker.(Sticks out her tongue and runs toward 
the game)

Ranma:Why you?!

(Hoists Kuno up and gets to his feet. He run toward the machine, closely 
behind Akane, Kuno slumped over his shoulder. He quickly runs past her 
and plants Kuno bodily over the controllers. Since the game was on it's 
back, Ranma didn't have to worry about Kuno falling off the machine if 
it was standing upright)

Ranma:(Sticks out his tongue)Ha!(Sticks out tongue)Think you can fool 
me-Erk!!!

(The battle between Ukyo and Shampoo and Ryoga somehow moves over to 
where Ranma was standing. Ranma gets consumed by the cloud of dust. 
Voice could be heard) 

Ranma's voice:Hey., letgo of me Shampoo.

Ukyo's voice::Hey, don't you dare touch my Ranchan.

Ryoga's voice:Ranma, how dare you set both girls after me!!!

Ranma's voice:Take this, 'Hadoken'!!!

Ryoga:'Oh yeah? Shoryuken'!!!

Akane:(Shaking her head)Baka.(Turns toward the game)Man, how am I gonna 
get Kuno off? I guess I better use the traditional way.

(Akane grabs on of Kuno's limp arms and shoulder throws into the ensuing 
battle)

Akane:Hee, now I can finish Ranma`s character off.(Looks at the 
screen)Huh?

Ranma:(Emerging from the cloud of dust)Ugh! Man, that was harsh.(Looks 
at Akane)What's up? What's with that weird look?

Akane:(Points toward screen)Look.

Ranma:(Looking)Draw?! Arghh!!! The time for the round ran out!!!

Akane:It's all your fault!!!

Ranma:Well, there's always the next round.

(The scene changes. It's now about three hour later since Ranma and 
Ryoga first went into the gameroom. Ranma and the rest of the gang could 
be seen emerging from the arcade room. They all walk down the street)

Shampoo:(Glomping onto one of Ranma's arms)So, when Ranma take Shampoo 
on date?

Ukyo:No way, Ranchan's going to take me out on a date. I was the one who 
stopped Ryoga.

Akane:Hrph.

Ranma:I'm not takin' neither of you on a date. I didn't see you beat up 
Ryoga.

Shampoo and Ukyo:What?

Ranma:Ryoga wandered off. You two were busy fighting each other, not 
Ryoga. It just so happens he was between the both of you.

Akane:(Turns toward Ryoga)You wandered off? Where?

Ryoga:I don't know. I somehow ended up in the restroom. I thought I was 
heading toward the game.

Ranma:Man, talk about a bad sense of direction. You can't even find 
yourself out of a room with on door.

Ryoga:Shut up!!!

Akane:Hey, leave Ryoga alone.

Ryoga:A-Akane. T-Thanks.

Ranma:Hey, whatever happened to Kuno?

Akane:I don't know. I threw him toward you guys when you were fighting.

Ranma:Well, who really cares. Man, I can't wait till tomorrow.

Akane:(Curiously)Why?

Ranma:What else? So we can try this again. I'm sure I can get better in 
that game

Ryoga:You know what, I wouldn't mind playing that game again.

Akane:Me neither. It's too bad the extension cord got pulled when Ranma 
tripped over it.

Ranma:I didn't trip over it. Someone threw my into it.

Ukyo:Well, I, for one, would definitely give that game a try. I like the 
thought of playing a game that's so realistic, especially with the ki-
blasts and revised Hiyru ShotenHa's

Ranma:I know. That game is so real. I can't believe it. I wonder if 
there are more games like that in there. I mean, Ryoga and I never 
really got a good look around.

Shampoo:Shampoo interested in playing game also. Shampoo noticed Chinese 
female character before game turn off and want to play her.

(Together, everyone walks off toward the horizon as the scene fades to 
black)


<End for now>


     Well, did you like it? This was a feeble attempt at a humorous 
story. I hope you laughed at least once while reading this. Well, first 
off, I would like to say that the characters in this story belong to the 
divine Rumiko Takahashi, and that without her, I would never had written 
this. As to why I wrote this, I have no idea. I guess I always wondered 
how Ranma would react when seeing one of his ki-blasts used in a game. 
Also, I wanted to take a crack at humor instead of all those drama-type 
stories I write. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the story. Comments are very 
welcomed. I rarely receive comments on my attempts in humor. I apologize 
from the grammar and spelling mistakes.


				Jeffrey "OneShot" Wong

<Bye>

	

-OneShot
Jeffrey Keith Wong: jeffwong@li.net
http://www.rit.edu/~jkw7063/fanfic/index.htm
http://www.li.net/~jeffwong/index.htm
The latter site has been updated on Aug 31st.