Gomen.  Gomen.  Gomen nasai ne!  Sumimasen, anatagata.  There.  
Enough Japanese practice.  I promise that this will be the last 
goof that will be coming from me this week.

Apparently, I can't do anything in Onnama yet, since Doug is 
already in the process of writing chapters two and three, and 
that means that wait we should.  I'd personally and publicly 
thank anyone for their comments on the PROLOGUE, which I 
mistakenly posted as chapter 1 (as well as the real deal).

What a big goof.  ^_^

I tried forwarding them to his address at 
LARKED.Truro.NSCC@truro.nscc.ns.ca or larked@truro.nscc.ns.ca
but my mailer just said that the address didn't exist.

Sigh.  In any case, C&C can be sent to me, to Doug at the above 
addresses, or sign the logbook on the Onnama homepage at 
http://142.227.43.9/student/cisn/larked/onnama.htm.  (Oh, yeah.
A teaser on Chapter 2 is on the page, too.)

In any case, I'm posting the prologue again, and the REAL chapter 
one.  Of course, these are written by the man, Douglas "LinLin" Larke, 
and can be found at the URLs after the segment.  Until a sign appears, 
this will be the last post that will come out on OSH.  Hopefully,
Doug won't kill me, and will still allow me to do that story-arc I'm 
planning... <evil grin>.

I want C&C!  You want C&C!  We want C&C!  Thanks!

Onnama Saotome Hibiki
created and written by Douglas Larke
edited, textifacted and reposted by Nikholas "Switch" F. Toledo

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Please remember that this is fanfic project.  It has no bearing on the 
real Takahashi storyline, nor is it based solely on Shinto religion.  As 
well, I do *not* claim any rights to anything here.  It all belongs to 
someone else, I simply conceived and wrote the fanfiction.  Domo! ^_^
------------------------------------------------------------------------

Prologue

	"No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
	The rain pelted down heavily on the ragged form of a young boy 
kneeling in the rain, his clothes in tatters and his body covered with 
blood.  His black hair hung heavily over his blue eyes, as if trying to 
shield its owner from the bloodshed that surrounded the boy.  In the 
boy's arms rested the limp, torn body of what was once a young girl.
	"Why?!?" screamed the young boy, "why!?!"
	"Because I wished it," said the dark figure in front of the young 
boy.  "All these pathetic fools thought they could defeat me, but none 
could.  Even you, the great Ranma Saotome could not fell me.  Although 
I'll admit you gave me a good fight, it seems all for naught.  Now I 
shall kill you like I killed all your family and your friends."
	Ranma's head sunk in despair as he remembered the deaths, every one 
burning a hole in his soul as he recalled how each one met their fates, 
some of them sacrificing to defend another, who would later die anyways.  
Shampoo, Ryouga, Kunou, Tsubasa, Ukyou, Mousse... all made the ultimate 
sacrifice so that the ones they loved would stand a chance to survive.  
It seemed now like they had died in vain.
	And it wasn't just fighters that died.  Anyone who was any way 
involved with the Toukyou Mafia died.  He never understood why Nabiki and 
Kasumi had to go down like that; they weren't combatants, and they 
definitely didn't deserve to die.  Although, he still had no idea what 
that ball of light was that protecting her and Nabiki for a while.  Was 
it his imagination, or did it seems to come from the hands of... Kasumi?  
And what became of his mother?  The darling woman who he had barely even 
had a chance to know?  Did she make it?
	Ranma shook these thoughts out of his head as he looked at the 
figure that loomed over him.  These people died... but it would not be 
for nothing....  If they died fighting, then so would Ranma, in tribute 
to them all.
	"I must admit, however," the figure concluded, "the girl you're 
holding was the most pleasure to kill.  She fought like a dog in heat 
while I killed her, angrily resisting my every attempt to take her life 
away, but when her body finally broke, when her neck finally snapped like 
a twig, it was also beautiful to watch that strength flow out of her eyes 
like warm blood...."
	A loud screech pierced throughout the air.  It was Methusdan's last 
mistake.  Memories of Akane began flooding Ranma's mind: their first 
meeting, the times he saved her life, and she his, the marriage, the 
first night they made love and how she had felt....
	"Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed the young boy as all restraint 
and memory of past wounds fled from his mind.  Ranma summoned up all the 
hurt, the loss of his father, friends, mother, and his wife, and formed 
into one last blast of chi, which gunned straight at...
	Methusdan was too busy gloating in his victory to notice the ball 
of chi, and barely had a chance to recognize what it was that was coming 
towards him before his body was hurled through five feet of brick and 
shrapnel by the the large chi blast that scored a direct bulls-eye on his 
chest.
	"Take that, you bastard!" screamed Ranma, his eyes glowing red from 
intense hatred.
	But Methusdan was not listening anymore.  He had taken a lot of 
damage in his past fights, even more so from his last battle with the 
young Saotome, and he had no strength left to combat this last blast.  
His body slumped down, bereft of life.
	Ranma almost began to shout in victory, but then he remembered the 
body that was at his feet now.  Ranma fell to his knees in despair, 
lifted Akane's body to the sky, and screamed, "why?  Why did all this 
have to happen?"
	"I don't know, son..."
	Ranma spun and around to see his mother standing before him, 
radiating more chi than he had sensed off any one person before.  Beside 
her stood a man in a plain white robe with a rice farmer hat covering his 
head, hiding his eyes.
	"Mother!  You lived!  How?????"
	"All will be explained soon, son.  Your victory has saved our 
world, and now your friends' and family's spirits can be returned to 
their bodies, so that they may return to their lives.  But first, allow 
me to introduce you to my little brother, your uncle Raiden-kun..."
	Ranma automatically assumed the Takahashi finger pose...

------------------------------------------------------------------------
       (URL: http://142.227.43.9/student/cisn/larked/fanfic1.htm)
------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 1

	Onnama sped down the street, her pigtails whirling back at the high 
velocity the young girl was travelling.  Travelling on legs that rivaled 
the beauty of Benzaiten, yet held the strength and power that any 
Joketsuzoku-onna (Amazon Girl) would be proud of, she rounded the final 
corner and quickly sped through the open fence gate, towards the front 
door of her family's Doujou Home.
	Onnama then proceeded to run *through* the door.
	!!!!!!!!CRASH!!!!!!!!!!
	"Ah!!!  I'm home!  Home sweet home!  Back among my loving fami...."  
*SMACK*
	Onnama dropped to the ground as a large basin of laundry landed on 
her head.
	"Back among the land of the broken doors, you mean!" retorted Onee-
chan angrily, "what is the meaning of you insisting on breaking down the 
door almost every single day?  Do you think this family is made of 
money?"
	Onnama wasn't listening to any of this, of course, she was busy 
watching her Onee-chan's ponytail bounce up and down while she hollered, 
the pink roses providing a perfect contrast to her raven black hair.  
Mapa would comment sometimes that Onee-chan looked cute with black roses 
in her hair, but then Mama would just retort that no one really missed 
the black rose, and anyways, The Pink Rose sounded softer, and that was 
what her concubine was, soft.  Then Mama, Mapa, and Onee-chan would start 
making out again.  Sometimes Onnama thought that her parents, and their 
concubine, Kodachi, had two modes: Fight mode, or Make-out-like-mad mode.
	"Ranma!  You over-grown, unworthy, scum-sucking, vomit-licking, 
dirt eater!  You open your mouth one more time, and I'm gonna staple your 
lips to the floor and chase you with a picture of my brother-in-law!!!"
	"Hmmmm," Onnama said to herself, "they seem to be in the Fight 
mode, but that could change at any moment...."
	Onee-chan spun around, running towards the sounds of the two 
quarreling spouses, calling out, "don't fight, darlings!  It sets a bad 
example for the children!  Let's have wild passionate sex on the kitchen 
table instead!"
	"No!" Onnama heard Mama's voice call out, "I'd rather sleep with 
Commissioner Gosunkugi then touch that pervert!"
	"Soooo..." Mapa's female voice called out, leeringly, "that's where 
you've been spending your extra time!  I hope he's enough man for you..."
	"At least he is a man most of the time.  Unlike someone I know!
	"Ohhhhhhhhh!  Have another one, you bloody lush!  It's not my fault 
that your fingers cut you off last night, you baka!"
	"Ranma-sama!  Akane-chan!  Stop fighting!  I have something to show 
you both!"
	"Kodachi-chan!!!  There are children in this house!" Onnama heard 
her Mama exclaim.
	She also heard her Mapa say, "oh, that old thing again," quickly 
followed by Onee-chan's loud scream, "OLD THING?!?!?!  DIE RANMA-SAMA!!!  
DIE!!!!"
	Onnama, tired of the usual violent welcome home, and headed 
upstairs to her bedroom, ignoring the sounds of her Mapa in agony as his 
two wives pounded him into obliteration.  "Oh well", Onnama thought to 
herself, "maybe they will be fighting for a while..."
	After wading through the hello hugs of some of her younger 
siblings, Onnama managed to make it through to her bedroom.  Quiet, 
tranquility, peace.
	"Yoh Onnama!  How ya do!" bellowed two high-pitched adolescent 
voices attempting to carry a tune, backed by a whiny-electric guitar and 
a horrible drum roll, "come in, we wrote a song for you..."
	A young boy with short brown hair, wearing a Puke-to-die shirt, 
then proceeded to enter into a main guitar riff that sounded like a 
wounded panda having it's appendix removed with a dull soup ladle, and a 
boy with long black hair and glasses continued to bang a random rhythm on 
some abomination he called drums.  All this took place while Onnama's ear 
began to steam, and she began her blue-glow thing that she had inherited 
from her Mama.
	"Otoko no Baka!!!!"  And with that, Onnama proceeded to punt her 
two "cousins" out her bedroom window, breathing heavily and 
exasperatedly...
	Having rid herself of the noisy pests, Onnama laid back down on the 
bed and tried to relax again.  It was hard having so many pseudo-cousins 
at once.  Half of them were actually of no relation to her, but because 
of the closeness of all their parents, they insisted on their being even 
more of family atmosphere than there was in most other Japanese family 
friends.  Of course, Onnama also had the precarious predicament of having 
a mess load of half-brother and sisters, and no real full-blooded 
brothers or sisters.
	Onnama sighed and looked over at the two family portraits that were 
sitting up primly on her little pink dresser, the one that Grandpa Tendou 
had given to her on her fourth birthday.  Grandpa Tendou had made it with 
his own two hands for his third, and sadly, last daughter, Akane, 
Onnama's Mama.  That made it really special, and made Onnama very happy.
	However, the family portraits put a damper on her mood.  True, she 
was in both, and true, she was in the grasp of a loving family in each 
one.  But the smile that was printed on her face in each one belied the 
heartache and longing that was in her heart.  The longing for the time 
when there wouldn't be two portraits, but one large one.  
	But that was one wish that would probably never come true.  Onnama 
was the product of two people that, although they may have believed they 
were in love the night that she was conceived, they never seemed to be in 
love after that.  In fact, far from it.  A long string of trashed 
birthday parties stood testimony to that.  Birthday parties that ended 
with all of her childhood friends heading home early, her Mapa and Papa 
brawling, and young Onnama-chan in tears.
	Of course, the two arguers usually didn't have too long to continue 
their physical assault on each other, as shortly after the other children 
were sent home, the two combatants were mobbed by their wives.  The bad 
memories of one particular birthday began to flood in to her, there 
seemed to be no way for her to stop the memories, for they barged in like 
a raging river...

	"You inconsiderate pair of jerks!" she remembered her Mama shouting 
at the guilty-looking pair of hooligans who stood side by side in rumpled 
and torn clothing.  "Once again!  On your daughter's birthday!  Have you 
two no sense of responsibility or caring!  How many times are we going to 
have to go through this!"
	Her Mama was normally the first one to get angry, and she was most 
certainly living up to her fiery reputation that day.  She stood before 
Onnama's two cowering biological parents; although her Mapa, what she 
called her "biological" mother was in his female form, having been dunked 
in the Kool-Aid punch by her Papa, which was what she called her 
"biological" father.  Her Papa had had the good fortune *not* to have 
been dunked into any liquid, or he really would have been feeling small 
in his piglet form.  Not that he looked that manly as he tried to back 
into the little corner of the wall...
	"Every bloody year!  Every year!  Are you two that uncaring that 
you have to ruin that little girl's fun *every* year?!?!  I just...can't 
*believe* your gall!  Especially you, Ranma!"
	"Mu-mu-me?" Mapa stammered out... his/her pigtail standing 
frightfully on end.
	"Yes, you!" Onee-chan chided, waving her black rose under the damp 
Saotome's nose, "Onnama lives here most of the time, and you know how 
much she always talks about having just *one* birthday party with no 
fighting!  And you not only totally disregard her feelings, but trash her 
beautiful birthday cake as well!"
	"Yeah!" Papa interjected, sensing a spot where he could put all the 
blame on his nemesis, "what did you go and do that for, Saotome?!?"
	"Shut up, Ryouga!" Aunt Akari said sternly, taking every one off-
guard, especially Papa, since she very rarely spoke in that tone to her 
husband, "if I remember correctly, *you* were the one who threw him in 
there..."
	This was followed by a few half-attempts by the two accused to do 
their typical "Yeah, but that jerk did.....", only to be cut off sharply 
by Mama.
	"Silence!" she yelled, "you two have a responsibility to that 
child!  She is your daughter, you know!"
	"It's not like it was my idea!" Mapa retorted defensively.
	"Yeah," Papa shouted back, "I never asked to have a kid with this 
deviant!  I was forced!!!"
	Onnama's glass heart had shattered when she had heard this.  She 
had always wondered how two people who fought so much, could have been in 
love at one time, like every one had told her.  But it was on that day 
that a subconscious voice was born.  A subconscious voice that would 
forever haunt Onnama, questioning as to the real way that her Mapa and 
Papa had conceived Onnama.
	At the same time as the ill-fated words left the pair's mouths, 
they realized that it was a mistake.  They both quickly looked over at 
the little girl who had only been sitting on the other side of the living 
room, miserably opening her birthday presents.  Those words had caused 
her to start to cry uncontrollably.
	Most of the children thought that were nothing that Ryouga Hibiki 
and Ranma Saotome hated worse that being ganged up on by their 
wives/concubine (as the case might be), but there was.  Seeing Onnama-
chan cry.  Suddenly, the two toughest martial artists in the universe, 
were turned into the World's wimpiest slimes, about three inches tall, 
not to mention they probably knew how their feet tasted as their feet 
were now stuck in their mouths.  
	Onee-chan flatly said, "boy, am I glad I became your concubine, you 
are *such* a gentleman," and proceeded to attempt to park her broom in a 
very private part of Mapa's body, causing the pig-tailed wonder to hit 
the floor in great pain.
	Aunt Akari had just looked icily at Papa and said softly, "I am 
going home now, Husband.  Take your time coming back.  Don't worry, I 
won't be waiting up for you..."
	With that she whisked around curtly, and stormed out of the 
training hall, pausing briefly to give the crying birthday girl a 
sympathetic kiss and hug.
	Papa stumbled after her half-dazedly, "Akari-chan....."
	He stopped guiltily as neared the crying girl.  He knelt down, and 
wrapped his arms around her.  "I'm sorry, Onnama-chan..." he said 
quietly, "I really mean it..."
	Mapa had managed to cross the floor in one piece, and also placed 
his arms around the girl, "Me two, Baby Doll.  We're really sorry..."
	The two had knelt there together for about an hour, holding her.  
Every year after, they got a little better at not fighting as much, but 
it was too late, and the damage had been done.  A small part of her 
innocence had been stolen from her that day.

	Onnama rolled over onto her back, and breathed slowly out.  Life 
could be so difficult in an adult's marriage.  Everyone thought Aunt 
Shampoo and Uncle Tsubasa's marriage was going to crash before it even 
got off the runway, and yet it seemed to be the most stable of all her 
aunts and uncles' marriages.  Rare was the time she ever saw them fight, 
of course the fact that Aunt Shampoo would probably crush Uncle Tsubasa 
like a bug if he ever argued with her could have played a major part in 
the success of their marriage.  Come to think of it, Uncle Mousse and 
Aunt Perfume were a lot like that too.
	Then again, her Papa's idea of arguing with Aunt Akari was "you're 
right... I'm sorry... please forgive me."  Her Mapa was another story, 
though.  It was very apparent that sometimes he loved getting his wife 
and Concubine miffed at him, though the birthdays were not one of those 
times.
	Onnama wondered if she would ever get married.  It seemed like such 
a large responsibility, yet if it was so bad, why did adults do it all 
the time?  And if it was such a burden, why did her Mapa take a concubine 
along with a wife?  Onnama wondered what sort of man she would marry.  
Certainly no one like her cousin Tatchi.  Aunt Nabiki thought it was cute 
how he acted "just like his father did when he was a kid...", but Onnama 
didn't find it cute at all.  Really, chasing after her all the time... 
okay, they weren't really blood, but they were cousins by law, and that 
should mean something.  Not to the great Tatewaki Kunou II.  
	"My violent twin-pigtailed Venus, allow me to be your man!" the 
revolting creature would say every time he spied her on the school yard, 
and then would proceed to attempt to grope her and express his affection 
with a bear-hug.
	After responding with a few Tenshin Amagurikens to either a) his 
head, b) his stomach, or c) the privies, Onnama would usually reply with 
a) "Dry up and die, ya Pervert!", b) "Take a long walk into a Katana, you 
jerk!", or c) "Here let me help you learn to sing soprano, Kunou Sempai!"
	Onnama shook her head, when she realized that she was making 
herself an old lady long before her time.  Hell, she'd only begun to 
live.  Why worry about all this dumb marriage stuff anyways?
	Onnama jumped up with renewed energy as she heard Onee-chan's voice 
calling her down for supper.  "Save that relationship garbage for all the 
old foggies....." she thought to herself as she bolted out her bedroom 
door, "I got a childhood to live!  And boy, am I gonna live it!"

	Ranma Saotome had never considered himself a family man as he was 
growing up.  He knew that that was probably because he father didn't 
provide him with much of a family life, having taken young Ranma away 
from his mother when he was only a baby.  But he had never pictured 
himself as one of those types could gain joy from staying in one place 
for long periods of time raising children.
	Akane sighed in his arms contentedly, and he pulled his sleeping 
wife a little closer to his chest.  Kodachi was on the other side of him, 
snuggling into his back.  That was something else he hadn't counted on, 
Kodachi.  Of all women for him to get involved with, Kodachi was the 
strangest.  If someone had told the 16-year-old Ranma that he was going 
to be taking Kodachi as a concubine, he would have told the person they 
were nuts, and then probably proceeded to hork on them.  He had never 
found her attractive back then.  But, then again, who would have thought 
that Shampoo and Tsubasa would make such a great couple?  Or that Ranma 
would develop such a soft spot in his heart for children?  But Onnama-
aka-chan had changed that, had changed Ranma, had changed everyone.
	It started after the cataclysmic battle.  Sure enough, just like 
his mother promised, all his family and friends were returned to life.
	She said it was the gods' way of repaying Ranma for the sacrifices 
he had made, and for defeating the magic dude.  Ranma just found it more 
political garbage.  Just like when he found out that his mother was the 
goddess of Chi, and his uncle was Raiden, god of Thunder, and that they 
were not able to help out because "the attackers were Supernatural, and 
Gods are forbidden to attack them unless the Gods are attacked first...."  
Yeah, right.  Ranma couldn't wait till he got his position of "Patron God 
Of Martial Artists".  You wouldn't see him saying that.  Anyone attacked 
his family, they'd be getting a taste of their own medicine.  However, 
Ranma couldn't help feeling sorry for his mother when she first appeared 
to him after the last battle.  How she had looked at her son kneeling 
there with his dead wife in his arms, pain emanating from his bloody 
face....  Those were real tears in her eyes.....
	At any rate, when the Toukyou Mafia, as all the martial artists who 
were associated with Ranma were called, were revived; they were quite 
mixed up by dying and then coming back.  Most of them were so messed up 
by it all, that they tried to go back to the playing the soap opera that 
had been occurring for the last few years.  But, Nodoka Omikami Saotome 
would have none of that... it was time for everyone to settle their 
differences, and prepare for married life.  That went double for Ranma 
and Ryouga Hibiki, she said.  
	So off Ranma and Ryouga were shuffled, off to the wilderness, for 
their last training session in the wild, before they gave it up for 
family life.  Naturally he and Ryouga fought the whole trip down, and 
argued the whole time they set up camp, and jabbed at each other while 
they had made dinner.  They were quiet during dinner, but that was only 
supposed to be until they finished dinner, then they would resume their 
quarrel (after all, dinner time was for eating, not sparring).
	But while the two had eaten, they had begun to experience strange 
emotions.  Ranma (who was in his female form at the time), had begun to 
experience weird feelings towards Ryouga whenever he looked at him, and 
he noticed Ryouga blushing every time he looked towards him/her.  The 
feelings got stronger and stronger as the night went on, until finally, 
they did the only natural thing for them to do; they started a fight with 
each other...
	That, of course, worked splendidly, and got rid of those weird 
emotions that they had begun to be infected with quicker than black 
piglets being slid down into barrels of acid by pig-tailed girls.  This 
made them quite happy, and a goddess quite pissed.  Before they could 
fully recognize what was happening, Benzaiten appeared with a strange 
broad with batwings who smashed the two foes' heads together, rendering 
them unconscious.
	Ranma had woken up several hours later, in his/her own sleeping 
bag.  With a bad head-ache.  Ryouga seemed to suffer the same 
predicament, but not suspecting anything, they just continued their 
training as usual - that is, fighting the whole time and looking forward 
to seeing their respective pregnant wives.  It wasn't until they returned 
from the trip that Ranma realized he couldn't turn back.  At first, he'd 
chalked it up to a disgruntled martial artist playing tricks on him for 
marrying Akane.  But it didn't affect him too much, because Akane was 
getting more pregnant, and wanted more softer lovemaking from her 
husband, which Ranma's female form was perfect at.  The person who 
infected him would show up again sooner or later, and when he did, he'd 
pound the cure out of him.  However, shortly after Akane had had their 
first child, Ranma Jr., Ranma began to suffer morning sickness.
	Naturally, havoc reigned when Dr. Toufuu announced, to the whole 
family no less, what the cause of all of Ranma's troubles was.  Almost 
everyone called him hentai, but what hurt the worst was when Akane began 
to question his fidelity to her.  Back-tracking, Akari Hibiki had figured 
out who was with Ranma at the time of the conception, and immediately 
sent Katsu-nishiki on a death hunt after Ryouga, for being an "unfaithful 
chauvinist dog" (pigs were not chauvinistic in her book, of course).
	It was around that time, that the parents got together to tell the 
two very upset and confused young fathers what had happened.  Ryouga and 
Ranma had proceeded to beat on their fathers, followed by the mothers 
using several blunt weapons on their sons.
	It was after the boys settled down and the mothers had cleaned the 
blood off their weapons, that the boys were told the purpose of Onnama, 
and why the two had been chosen for being parents of her.
	Almost since the dawn of time, the Chinese and Japanese deities had 
battled the Supernatural for control of the orient and the humans that 
lived there.  Once in a while, the supernatural would use humans in their 
battle, but it was never so bad, until what the Westerners called the 
Middle Ages.  The Supernatural moved the battle ground to Terra Firma, 
dragging the whole human race into the war, almost obliterating the whole 
race.  Seeing what was happening, both sides knew that for their own 
reasons, they each needed humans beings to still roam the earth, and that 
a wipe out of them would be very bad for everyone involved.  (Besides, 
the supernatural could see they were going to lose anyways.)
	So a truce was drawn up between the two sides.  At first it was to 
be carved in stone and stored in Mount Fuji, and it would state the 
restrictions that would be on both parties, and what they could do.  For 
example, under no circumstances was a God or Supernatural allowed to 
directly attack Another God or Supernatural, or their spouse.  This did 
not protect friends or family (except those living at the 
God's/Supernatural's home), and humans could be used to act as warriors 
for the two sides.
	Lastly, an official truce would have to be made within a thousand 
years to signify the bond.  A child born from both sides.  However, it 
became apparent that pure strain Supernatural couldn't mate with pure 
strain Gods, so the couple would have to be half-humans.  Lastly the 
mother would have to be strong enough, with an immense amount of internal 
energy.  The Mother (the name the Gods referred to Amaterasu as...) 
decided that her daughter Nodoka should have a child for this honor, 
since she was the Goddess of Chi.  So she arranged a marriage with a 
strong martial artist, Genma Saotome.  Unfortunately, Nodoka forgot that 
she was having the mother, not the father, of Onnama, and cast a spell of 
masculinity on her unborn child.  When the Mother appeared at the birth 
of Nodoka's child, she was rather unhappy to see a boy, although Genma 
was quite pleased.  Amaterasu had just sighed, and turned her son-in-law 
into a newt (he had gotten better...).
	The Mother said that there was nothing for it, but to have Ranma 
fall into a Jusenkyou spring - spring of drowned girl - so that he could 
still perform his purpose, in return, Ranma would become Patron God of 
Martial Artists, if he could become good enough....  Nodoka agreed, but 
that didn't mean that her son couldn't be manly.  So she allowed her son 
to go travelling with her husband, supposedly unwillingly, so that he 
could be raised to be a man among men.  (Author's note: If this seems 
unlikely... ask yourself this... why else would Nodoka allow him to go 
for so long when she's so strong willed?)  And she left him with a death 
vow to make Ranma manly, just in case her lazy husband tried to relax too 
much.
	Amaterasu had waited till Ranma was sixteen before she led him and 
his father to Jusenkyou, when she had finally thought that he was ready 
to accept the responsiblity.  And besides, he was about to be engaged a 
fine young daughter of one of her favorite worshippers, Souun Tendou.  
How could Ranma resist a girl that cute, they'd be wed in a week, and 
that would make Ranma even more manly, despite his female form.  
Unfortunately, a year had passed after Ranma had moved to Toukyou, and 
still no wedding invitations had come to Nodoka.  Nodoka investigated by 
posing as a Circus lady, and discovered what was happening.  From there, 
she had decided it was time she showed up to put some pressure on.  It 
had been years, and Nodoka spent the first year just trying to get to see 
Ranma.  She had forgotten about the curse, until almost a year later, 
when Akane developed a zero-water fetish, and Ranko kicked the water 
kettle out of her hands.
	After Ranma was finally reintroduced to his mother, she set up a 
test of his manliness to impress her mother, by getting some of her 
followers to help out.  The Bird People were more than willing to help 
out the great goddess of Chi, and set out to cause as much grief for 
Ranma and his friends as possible.  Unfortunately, another favorite of 
Nodoka's, Safran was turned into a baby.  But one other thing had 
happened, Ranma had learned how precious Akane was.
	Naturally the first wedding had bombed, but the second went fine.  
Ranma remembered his first night with Akane, it was two weeks after the 
wedding night....
	Akane had been the aggressor then, gently showing him the ways of 
love, and letting him learn slowly how to bring her pleasure.  He had 
never forgotten that night.  He had never found himself able to call her 
uncute straight-faced after that.  She was cute, and she was the greatest 
thing that had ever happened to him.  They made love every day, and the 
two lovers drove their family completely up the wall with their perfect 
love talk.  Often driving Nabiki into fits of anguish where Kasumi would 
have to prevent her sister from setting the newlywed couple on fire.  But 
no one could deny, the two were truly in love, and nothing mattered.  The 
world seemed perfect.
	Methusdan, a renegade Supernatural, had showed up.  He had put up a 
force field which prevented all the Gods, and any Supernatural except for 
his minions to gain access to the human plain.  He had no interest in 
Onnama to be created.  He hated the gods, and would be damned if he would 
allow any kind of peace to be made.  At first he had tried to convince 
Onnama's father-to-be to join his side, but Ryouga had refused, saying he 
wanted nothing to do with it, and that he was a god-fearing human.  
Ryouga had paid with his life, and had died with a broken back, watching 
his new wife raped and murdered.
	Ranma was next, and Methusdan met with the same answer.  So he 
dealt the same punishment.  Killing everyone in Toukyou; letting lovers 
watch each other die before their own eyes.  Mousse, Kunou, Kodachi, 
Ukyou, Tsubasa, Konatsu, Shampoo... all fought for the one they loved, 
and died horribly for it, falling side by side, like butcher's meat.  
Ranma could only watch helplessly as one by one, everyone he knew died 
due to the overwhelming numbers of Supernatural creatures.  His father, 
Souun, Hinako, and even Happy and Cologne eventually were engulfed in 
flames.  Ranma had somehow survived to the end, and even though the rest 
had perished, they had taken with them 95% of the demons.  40% had been 
killed when they had tried to attack Akari without killing Ryouga the 
first time.  Ranma was able to reach Methusdan.
	But Methusdan fought using despair.  He had kept Akane Saotome 
alive for the sole purpose of defeating Ranma.  He had snapped her neck 
in front of Ranma, in an attempt to break the poor boy's spirit.  Ranma 
had watched the love of his life struggle, and then gasp and bug her eyes 
out, as death washed over her lovely face.  Perhaps if Methusdan had 
studied Ryouga's and Ranma's fighting styles more closely, he would have 
realized that the Shi Shi Houkoudan is based upon negative feelings, the 
more the grief, the bigger the blast.  Ranma know knew he could never 
make a blast that big again.  The agony that shot through his heart as he 
saw his lover's crumpled body hurled at him, and the memory of his 
friends and his family was so intense, it was quite possible that a blast 
that huge would not be seen for quite some time, if ever.  Methusdan 
definitely wouldn't; Ranma had made sure of that.
	So, after the fight everyone came back to life, and were paired up.  
A friend of Shampoo's from the village, Perfume, showed up to rape, uh 
that is, make Mousse her husband.  Ranma had asked if Mousse didn't have 
to defeat her first, and Shampoo had replied that that only applied to 
outsiders, not villagers; village women only needed to grab whatever 
village man they wanted, not be beaten by them.  Mousse then pointed out, 
with his neck still in Perfume's loving hands, that that was the reason 
he had never bothered to try to defeat Shampoo in combat, because he 
would gain nothing from doing it.
	Kunou and Nabiki paired up, so did Kasumi and Toufuu, Ukyou gave 
her heart to the ninja Konatsu, and Hinako was granted a chi brooch from 
her goddess Nodoka so that she could safely capture Souun as a husband.  
Shampoo was a strange case.  For some reason, the spirits of Happousai 
and Cologne had decided they wished to pass on to the other world, and 
did not wish to return.  Shampoo who was still recovering from the loss 
of Ranma, now had to run a shop and raise LinLin & RanRan alone, while 
mourning the loss of the old woman who had meant so much to her for so 
long.  (It's said that someone mourned the loss of Happy, but we have yet 
to find that person.... Author)  Tsubasa, also mourning the loss of his 
love to Konatsu, had gone to her restaurant for ramen, somehow, and in 
some weird fashion, they built a love together, and were soon married.  
This shocked everyone, but their marriage had proven to be one that would 
last, so no one questioned it any more.
	Flashing forward to the birth of Onnama, Ranma remembered how bleak 
his life had seemed at that point.  His wife was constantly angry at him; 
everyone in Toukyou thought he was a pervert; and his father kept 
sneaking into Ranma's room, to steal all the fruit baskets he was sent.  
As D-day came closer, Ranma began to dread more and more what would 
happen to him after the child was born.
	However, the birth wasn't the end, it was a beginning.  He had gone 
through ten hours of painful labor.  (Akane couldn't help but remind him 
to this day that Ranma Jr. had required fourteen from her....)  But when 
the child was handed to Ranma, and he held the child he had developed for 
nine months inside his female form, Toukyou's greatest martial artist 
fell to tears.  Onnama's little face had seen like a little angel's face 
smiling at her.  None of his male friends seemed to care about hearing 
how Ranma had felt at that moment, but the ladies were.  Most of them 
seemed sincerely interested whenever Ranma started to babble on about 
little Onnama-chan.
	Of course, Ranma wasn't the only one who fell in love with Onnama.  
Something about her seemed to grab everyone's attention.  Suddenly, it 
seemed, Onnama was all everyone could talk about.  "Did you see Saotome's 
Girl?"  "Did you hear what they named the Saotome Girl?"  Even Ryouga 
enjoyed spending time with her, and never failed to mention that she had 
obviously gotten her good looks from her father.  The girls were 
especially charmed by her, even Shampoo and Ukyou, who couldn't help but 
coddle the baby to the exhaustion, usually followed by them looking at 
their husbands with long and forlorn looks.  But the one most taken by 
Onnama was a girl Ranma and Akane had not seen for a while, Kodachi 
Kunou.
	From the first moment Kodachi had laid eyes on Onnama, there had 
been an unspoken love between her and the child.  Kodachi could never 
seem to leave the baby's side, and no matter how much crying Onnama may 
have been doing, Kodachi always managed to be the one to quiet her down.
	After Ranma recovered from childbirth, Akane and he began to be 
very busy renovating the Training Hall, and teaching the new generation 
of students.  Between that and caring for the two infants that left zero 
opportunities for Ranma and Akane to rebuild their relationship.  
Everyday, they woke up beside each other, and every night, they would lay 
down to go to sleep beside each other (followed by intermediate crying 
breaks each night by Onnama or Ranma Jr.), and that seemed to be the 
extent of their closeness.  Every day, it seemed they were drifting 
farther apart from each other, Ranma had even begun to notice some of the 
more attractive female members of his adult classes, and he couldn't be 
too sure about what Akane was thinking.
	Then Kodachi had made an offer.  For room and board, she would take 
care of the two infants for the young couple, leaving them with time to 
spend with each other.  It had worked!  Kodachi had gotten to spend more 
time with Onnama, and Ranma and Akane had some free chance to rekindle 
their old romance that wasn't that old to begin with.  Back then, Ranma 
had thought Kodachi had become a Saint.  Now Ranma knew better, she had 
gotten smart.  Kodachi had plans, and Onnama would be the key to her 
getting what she wanted......
	Ranma's eyes fluttered, as sleep overcame him.  He nestled 
comfortably in the arms of his two lovers, and fell into a deep sleep...

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        (URL: http://142.227.43.9/student/cisn/larked/fanfic2.htm)
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Searching for Doug...
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The logo of the Church of All Worlds is nine concentric circles.
Word from the Laity:  Wipe yer feet!  Bloody 'ell...
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Currently under construction... confessional at the links.
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