Announcer: "Yes!  It's *that* time again!  A new author to cheer, geer, and smear from one end to the other!"
C & Cers: "YEA!!!"
Announcer: "Ok, folks.  We're issuing your favorite tools of the trade.  Here are flamethrowers, fire extingushers, and bucket-loads o' spam to heap upon him!  Also provided: Transport to evacuate the young, and weak-of-heart for those who don't want to use the barf buckets, in case of emergency."
C & Cers: "Awwww...."
[SuperHentai walks in wearing asbestos clothing]
SH: "Ok.  Do your best and your worst!  Any flames will be read, thought over and given to Mengane 6.7 for a Chiken Cannon quick reload."
[general frightened sounds and mumbling from the crowd]
(NOBODY wants to be on the recieving end of said cannon....)

x-x-x-x
Seriously, this is my first attempt at a fic, and I would like your input on this story.  Should I continue it?  What improvements should be made.  That sort of thing.  I'm willing to listen to anybody who has anything to say.  So log on, and soud off.  I'm listening.

SuperHentai

(Yes I know, I got the city wrong.  But would someone please tell me the correct city name?)
x-x-x-x

     Nothing is Hopeless
     ch. 1

	An airplane lands, quickly and deftly  at Edge City Airport, disgorging an excited but unhappy person.  Awaiting him are two people that moved quickly to intercept him.  Looking from a distance, you could tell that these three were cops.  The man who exited the plane, was tall, thin, wearing a trenchcoat, fedora, and a chip on his shoulder as big as a 2 x 4.  The other was shorter, heavy-set, balding, with a red mustache. He was wearing a rumpled dress shirt and a tie, that vaguely smelled of smoke.  The third was also tall and thin, wearing a fedora and trenchcoat.  He reeked of oil, and had an air of stupidity about him.
	*Greetings Inspector Zenigata!  I*m glad you could make it.* The shorter one said.  *I*m known as The Chief, and the gentleman to my right is Inspector Gadget.*  
	*Wowzers, and Inspector from the ICPO has come all the way out here!*
	With brief nods to both of them, Zenigata informs them *I*m here to apprehend the notorious Lupin the Third.  I heard that he was here to steal the Hopeless Diamond, which was currently here on display at your museum.*
	*Indeed*, the chief said.  *We would be glad to help you, any way we can.  That is why I Gadget is here.  He is over the security of the Hopeless Diamond.  He will be teamed with you for the duration of your stay in the U.S.*
	*WHAT?!!?*  Zenigata*s cry could be heard for 10 square miles.  *This  INCOMPETENT?!?*
	*I beg to differ.*, the Chief stated.  *He may seem incompetent, but he*s the best man I*ve got.  He has solved case after case in dealing from cat burglars to mad scientists.  And he has more gadgets to work with than you have ever seen.  They could be very useful in apprehending Lupin.*
	Gadget was extending his hand and saying, *I would be glad to help you appre...*.  But, Zenigata interrupted. * I don*t HAVE and don*t NEED a partner.  I will not have a partner.*  The Chief*s smile fades, and he looks Zenigata in the face, and states coolly but quite finally, * Either Gadget goes with you, or you go home.  This is our country, and my turf.  YOU have no jurisdiction here.  We invited you over here because of your warning and your experience with dealing with this extrordinary thief.  If you choose not to work with us, you can climb back into that plane and leave.  Do you understand?*
	Zenigata*s face gets reder and reder, and looks like he*s going to explode like a volcano.  Then he takes a deep breath and says, quietly and calmly, *On your head...  So be it.*  Turning to Gadget, *Do you have a car?* 
	Gadget waves at his hand at his car, *Over th..*
	*Fine, fine, let*s roll.*  Without another word to the Chief, he walks off towards the car, with Gadget close at his heels.  Zenigata climbs behind the wheel, with Gadget standing stupified by the driver*s door.
	*Um... Inspector...*
	*I*m driving.* Zenigata says, with a cold look.
	With a horrified look, *But.. but, you don*t understand!* , Gadget said.
	Glacially cold. *I*m driving.*
	*Okay.*  Gadget scoots arround to the other side of his patrol car, and climbs in.  With screeching tires, they speed off into the night.

************

	At Edge City Museum...

	On the roof, wearing black, Lupin and Jiegen are tinkering with the sky-light alarm, and deactivate it quite handily.  *Ok Jiegen, do you have the decending harness support ready?*
	*Yeah.  Let*s get moving Lupin.  We only have 15 minutes before the next guard patrol comes by.*  
	Through research, they found out about the laser beams creating an inpenitrable web through all three floors access to the diamond.  The glass was wired, if lifted, it would trigger an alarm.  Also, the diamond*s stand is pressure sensitive, if the diamond is lifted, again the alarm wouild be sounded.  When the alarm sounds, steel bars would drop, covering each door, preventing easy escape and a knock out gas would be released into the air, to aid in capture of the thief.  The only *easy* access to the diamond, was through the roof and a few strategicly placed mirrors...
	Lupin lowered his IR goggles and looked down. He whistled.   *Man, they are serious about thier laser security.  Too bad for them, they didn*t do enough about roof access... hee, hee, hee... Ok, Jiegen, let*s go.*  Being slowly lowered down 5 feet, *Hold up a minute, I need to place the first mirror.*  This had taken weeks of practice to get it done right.  He pulled out a gun, but an odd looking one.  Then he pulled out of his pouch, a mirror with a cork on one edge, and a suction cup on the other.  He sticks the cork end, into the gun and aims carefully.  *Pfft..* spat the gun, the mirror whistling for a wall, and *Poct* the mirror sticks to the wall.   Deflecting the laser back to it*s source.  *Mirror one placed.  Let*s move.*  Again and again, every 5 feet, they stop and do it again.  15 feet above his target, the Hopeless Diamond, Lupin sees something out of the corner of his eye.  A shimmer.  *Hold up a minute, Jiegen.  Somthing*s coming.*  Lupin is looking hard at what he thought he saw.
	*Whadda* ya* mean, someTHING is coming.  Don*t you mean someONE?* Jiegen asked, incredulously.  
	*SHHHhhh!  Something weird is going on!*  Lupin sees something, but doesn*t see it.  What is that?!?  It*s a shimmer.  About 5 feet tall.  It*s human, what ever it is...  I think... I hope.  I swear it*s looking at me.  It walks up to the glass case that holds the diamond, and smashes it!  Damn!  It*s stealing my diamond!  The shimmer fades, with sparks flying.  It*s a guy, wearing a translucent body suit with a red claw on the chest.  *Jiegen!  I need some help down here!  Someone is stealing our diamond!*  The guy smiles up at Lupin, grabbing the diamond, and what*s that on his back?  It looks like *FWOOSH!!!* a jet pack...  Watching the guy fly up and ...cut... his rope.  *AAAaaaaOmph!* doing a bellywhopper on the floor.  
	The flying claw, or what ever, flew out the skylight; knocking Jiegen over the side and down the building wall.  Jiegen, still holding the rope, tries to slow his decent with some success. Lupin hears vaguely, over the din of the alarm, *LUUUPIN!!!*
	*GET OUTTA HERE JIEGEN!!!  I*LL CATCH UP!!!*  Mumbling to himself, *exit, exit, I must find an exit!*  He hears the bars clank down, and gas hissing.  *NOW!*  Glancing about desperately, he spies a ventilation duct.  *Any port in a storm!*  Runs for it as fast as he can, hurdling other displays like only he can.  Grabing the grating over the duct, he rips it off the wall, and climbs in.  
	*Ok, I*m a mouse in a trap, with the cats coming in about 5 minutes, gotta move fast!*  He scurries through the duct work, trying to find someplace *quiet* to exit.  He finally finds one, concidering all the guards are raceing for gas masks and the diamond display, it was fairly easy.  Kicking the grate of the vetilation shaft, he climbs out.  Quickly, he*s takes off running the opposite way, away from the guards and the display.  Flying arround the corner, *Oomph!* he plows into a little girl.  At a quick glance, it*s a blond, pony-tailed girl with a blue t-shirt.
	*OW!  Hey!  You*re the THIEF!*  She glomps onto his leg, *GUARDS!  GUARDS!*  
	*Hey! Leggo!  I don*t have time for this!*  He tries to pry her off his leg, but only succeeds on her doing a bear hug from behind.  Piggyback stile.  He could live with that.  He takes off running again.  
	*Rowlf!  Rowlf!*  Glancing back, Lupin sees a dog, chasing him, running on it*s hind feet?!?  What?!?
	The girl screams, *GO GET UNCLE GADGET!  I*M OK!*
	With a decicive *Rowlf!* it turns a corner, heading for the main doors.  Lupin shakes his head in wonder.  *Just what kind of dog is that?!?*
	*You wouldn*t believe me if I told you.* She replied calmly smiling .

*************

	[from the police radio] *Attention all units, burglary in progress and the Edge City Museum, all units please respond.*
	*That*s Lupin!* Zenigata says, enthusiasticly.  *Where*s the siren on this thing?*, reaching for a button.
	*Not tha.. erk.. Go, go, Gadget Van!*  The patrol car goes through a vast transformation, changing  into a police van.    While Zenigata looks around the newly formed van, dazedly; Gadget gives him a uniquely disgusted look.  He just discovered that he had to say that, to prelude the transformation into the van.  Sure, he usually said it when HE pushed the button, but he didn*t know that he HAD to say it...  He definately didn*t like being forced into saying it, by anyone else.  *Just drive damn it!  Let me do the button pushing arround here!*  Numbly, Zenigata nods and puts his foot down.

************

	Lupin is running down the street, looking for Jiegen, when he finally says, *Ok.  Now, that I*ve picked up a hitch-hiker, mind telling me what your name is and why you persist on sticking with me?*
	*Well, I*m Penny.  And I*m staying with you because you are the thief who stole the Hopeless diamond.*
	He laughs.  *No Penny.  I didn*t.  Although I was there to steal it, someone beat me to it.  I don*t have it.  And where the He... ck is Jiegen?*  As though on cue, a compact, english import car comes screaming arround a corner barreling at them, and screeches to a halt.  The passenger door opens, and Jiegen looks at them.
	*Well Lupin, would you get a move on?*  Taking a good look at Penny, smiling he says, * Say, who*s your friend?  Isn*t she a bit young for your tastes?*
	Crouching down so she can get down, *Very funny.  Her name is Penny.  She thought I was the thief and tried to catch me.*  Lupin climbs in.
	*Well, she did catch a thief, Lupin, because you are one.*
	*Ha, Ha.  Well, Penny, nice meeting you.*
	*Hey! Wait!  I*m coming with you!*  She darts in behind the closing door, sliding into home plate across Lupin*s and Jiegen*s laps.
	*No!*  Followed by Jiegen*s  *You can*t!*  Then both say, *Get off me.*  They hear sirens approach, Lupin and Jiegen look at each other, and say at the same time.  *No more time, let*s get the He..<glances down> e.. ck out of here.*  Jiegen stomps on the gas, screaming off into the night.

**************

	Zenigata and Gadget pull up at the Museum.  Zegigata is acting like he owns the whole place.  *What*s going on here?  What*s been stolen?  And where is Lupin?*
	*Easy there Inspector.  Golly, you*d think that you*ve never handled a case here.  Let*s get to the diamond display, and see who*s sleeping there.*  Zenigata marches off into the Museum, and gets around two corners, when he realizes that he has no idea where the display is.  
	*Well, hurry up Gadget!* Waving impatiently.  *Get a move on!*
	*I*m coming, I*m coming!  Go, go Gadget skates!*  Roller scate wheels pop out of Gadget*s shoes, and he proceeds to calmly scate faster and faster, passing Zenigata.  *Come on, this way.*  Gadget is up to a run on his scates, turning corners effortlessly, *Hurry up, Zenigata, or I*ll catch him without you!*  Zenigata puts on a burst of speed, racing after Gadget. 
	*You*d better not!  He*s MINE!*
	*Then hurry up, because the display is at the end of this hall.*  About 20 feet from the doors, Gadget tries to stop.  He can*t.  He tries to slow down.  He can*t.  He*s forgotten how.  Legs backpedaling, arms windmilling, *Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!* *CRUNCH* He comes to a stop, slamming into the wooden doors.  Slowly, with Zenigata shaking his head disgustedly, pries himself off the doors.  *Wowz-OUCH!  I forgot, I can*t scate that well*, he replied sheepishly.
	Ruefully, *Oh, you can skate just fine.  It*s just stopping...* Zenigata said.  *How much longer before the knockout gas disapates?*
	*Oh, it will have disipated by now.  The active agents would have expired by now.  We should be ok to enter.*  Gadget punches in the access code to deactivate the alarm system, and opens the doors.  *There*s no one in here?*
	*I expected as much, from Lupin.  See?  The Hopless Diamond is gone.  I told you he would get.. it...*  noticing the black, nylon rope lying on the floor and th shattered glass.  Walking up to it, *This end has been cut...  Oh, it just has to part of Lupin*s plan, all along.  Lupin!  If it*s the last thing I do!  I*ll get you!!*
	Gagdet looks at him asayance, *Do you always say that?*
	He blinks.   *Oh, sure.  I*ve been chasing him for years.  Got him a few times, but he always gets away.   Don*t know how, mind you, but he does.  But, one day, ONE DAY!  Oh, hey, it looks like they escaped though the skylight.  What*s the quickest way up there, I want to check it out.*
	Gadget smiles, *No problem.*  Grabs him.  *Hang on!  Go, go Gadget legs!*  His metalic legs proceed to stretch upward towards the skylight.
	*Hey! Whoa!  Hold on!  aaaAAAA!!!*  Staring at the ground, Zenigata holds ontoGadget for dear life.  They finally reach the top and Zenigata climbs off Gadget and onto the roof.  Gadget holds on and retracts his legs, and joins him.  Staring at Gadget, looking him up and down,  *How?...  Who?...  WHAT are you?!!?*
	*I*m Inspector Gadget. I*m pleased to meet you, Inspector Zenigata.  I*m just loaded with gadgets, as my name tells you.  Don*t ask me to explain, because I can*t.  I just use them.  I*m a  part of them actually...*
	Shaking his head, *Never mind.  Let*s look around shall we?*  Zenigata points to the wrecked pully system and leftover gear that was left behind.  *Yeah, this is Lupin*s stuff, all right.  But, there*s a ... gadget?...  left up here...*