This is lemon. If you are in any way offended by written material of an
adult nature, do not read this. This a short fanfic, intended only to
provide some humor. I must warn you, the concept given in here is...well,
very tasteless (And was honestly written before Nekophilia: slighltly
similar concept). You have been warned.
Standard Takahashi Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.
Characters depicted here are the sole property of Rumiko Takahashi. I am
only borrowing them to create an off-color fanfic. Only Kumiko Tanaka is
my own creation.
C & C IS VERY WELCOME!!!
Ruby Daydreams
Ranma 1/2 Fanfic
By Eric Knudson
Thanks to Jeremy Fuller and Aaron Verzwyvelt
Quick Background: I made up the character of Kumiko Tanaka. I've made
her an old friend of Hinako's (perhaps a teacher from another school that
Hinako has taught at). Other than that, she has no significance.
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
"Wake up, Ranma Saotome!"
Ranma jerked upright in his chair. His heart was racing at having
been woken so suddenly. At first, still dazed by his dreaming, he didn't
recognize where he was. It returned with a cold shock. He was sitting in
his seat in Hinako-sensei's classroom - and she always took offense at
sleeping students.
"I will see you after class, Saotome-san," she piped in her
childish voice. "Now go stand in the hall."
Ranma dragged himself wearily from his chair and headed for the
door. This was such a common occurrence that the other students didn't
even bother to glance at him. He groaned inwardly. Things were not going
well. But then, things always seemed to take a turn for the worse around
him.
All the late night escapades were starting to wear him down. If
it wasn't one of his marital adversaries trying to kill him in his sleep,
then it was one of his would-be paramours trying some half-baked scheme to
gain his favor. Last night, in fact, had consisted of another escapade of
rescuing Akane from yet another kidnapper/suitor.
What he needed was rest. That, or some...uh...better not think of
it.
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
<Honestly!> Hinako thought. She didn't know what she was going to
do with that boy. He caused more disruptions in class than any other
student. Each day she came to class wondering what dramatic event would
take place before lunch. She no longer dreaded the disruptions - she was
resigned to them. What made it worse was Ranma's grades. They were
dropping significantly - especially of late. It was high time she had a
talk with his father about placing him in a tutoring program of some sort.
Ranma was facing certain failure in all subjects.
As Ranma's teacher it was her responsibility to make certain that
her students learned. She knew that Ranma's father wasn't the most re-
liable sort of person (all the more reason to take a firm role in his
education, herself!). She decided that she would talk with Genma Saotome
that very evening.
Feeling much better with her decision, Hinako turned her attention
back to the class. "Repeat after me class, <Theesu izu a pen...>"
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Hinako allowed Ranma to return to his seat when she felt he had
done enough penance. She didn't like sending him into the hall, as it
only caused him to miss more classtime. She just didn't know what else to
do.
To Hinako's relief, the rest of the day ran smoothly. Apparently
Ranma's female suitors had decided to take the day off. Even so, she co-
ntinued to glance at the clock with apprehension until the final bell
rang. When everyone had left the room she relaxed into her chair. She
would have only a short reprieve before various students returned to begin
the daily classroom clean-up.
Suddenly, she heard the door to the room slide open. She turned.
Ranma stood in the doorway in his female form.
<Oh no, not this again> Hinako thought rolling her eyes. She had
been forced to drain a few delinquent students during lunch. Inevitably,
Ranma found it necessary to poke her pressure points, thereby returning
her to her childish form and stunting her abilities for a short time.
Ranma-chan began to stalk toward Hinako with a determined look.
Ranma grinned to herself. She secretly enjoyed pressing Hinako-
sensei's pressure points. Who wouldn't? Getting to "feel up" their well-
endowed teacher, and for a good cause, too.
Hinako was thinking much the same thing; she didn't get out much,
and when Ranma touched her pressure points...
Hinako snapped back to the present. Ranma had to be taken to
task.
"Ranma-san, your homework!"
Ranma-chan stopped in mid-stride, confused. "Huh?"
Now, why had she used his first name? She brushed the thought
away, it was just the stress lately. "Saotome-san, you did not turn in
your homework today. Not that it would have mattered. And you show so
little attention in class it's no wonder that your grades are so
horrendous."
"Uh, that is..." Ranma-chan fidgeted, this wasn't what she had
expected when she came to the class. Additionally, she had only a few
moments to use her pressure-point technique before the after-school
cleaning students returned.
Hinako saw Ranma's hesitation and decided to press her advantage.
"Saotome-san, I want you to start showing improvement. I'm going to put
you on a plan to..."
Suddenly, the sound of a commotion outside burst through the open
windows. Voices were heard shouting and screaming. Most of it was
incoherent, but 'perverted old man' came in loud and clear.
"Shimatta!" Ranma expelled, running to the window. Outside a
large group of girls with brooms were chasing a "disguised" Happosai and
his pack around the yard. He taunted the girls while remaining easily out
of reach. Ranma-chan stepped onto a window ledge.
"Gomennasai, Hinako-sensei," she called over her shoulder before
leaping out.
Hinako sighed, again. That boy (or girl) was such trouble.
Sometimes it was so frustrating. It was her duty to provide a proper
education for Ranma, but he just wasn't doing his part. He was going to
have to get settled in a tutoring program or he was going to fail
miserably. She strongly suspected that he was getting help from Akane on
the assignments he *was* turning in. It was his tests that were the real
indication that he wasn't learning anything. She gathered her things -
she would just have to catch him on her way out.
Hinako was heading out the door when she remembered to stop at the
teacher's office and pick up her mail. The office was empty, to her
relief. The other faculty regarded her as strange and she was often
ostracized from their company. Without the other teachers present, the
office could (and often did) become a haven for her.
She crossed the silent room to the rack of inset cubicles that
housed the teachers' mail. She pulled a stack of envelopes from her
recessed box, "...junk mail...junk mail....bill...hmmmmm?"
Among her mail was a small notice indicating that she had received
a package. <Strange> she thought. <I don't remember mail-ordering
anything recently>
She walked over to the small desk allotted her among the others.
Sure enough, there was a small package labeled with her name and mailing
address. She picked up the package. It was a small cube about four
inches (10 cm) on a side, wrapped in simple brown packing paper. She
looked for, but could not find, any return address. Unable to contain her
excitement and curiosity she quickly unwrapped the small parcel.
What lay inside was an even smaller box, this time with rounded
edges and sheathed in velvet. She cracked it open. Inside lay a small,
heart-shaped jewel pendent sitting on a satin bed.
Hinako sucked in her breath in surprise and unexpected pleasure.
The heart jewel was a radiant red ruby. It was framed in gold with a gold
chain. Who could be sending such things to her?
The window near her suddenly shattered. In through the shattered
glass bounded a small black garbed midget with a large pack - Happosai.
He vaulted into Hinako knocking her over and sending him sprawling.
"Now I've got you, you old geezer!" Ranma-chan cried leaping into
the room. She hurdled the teacher's lounge in an attempt to reach the
dazed old pervert before he could recover. This was too much for Hinako.
She pulled herself off the floor an drew out her small yen coin, chanting
those fateful words...
"HAPPO-FIVE-YEN-DRAIN!"
Powerful charges of glowing chi drained off of Happosai in
torrents. The flowing streams filled Hinako, enervating her. She had
been aiming for Ranma, but this would do just as well; it ended the
commotion.
Ranma-chan stopped where she was, an indignant look on her face.
"Hey!" She started to move towards Hinako.
Hinako considered just draining Ranma and dealing with he academic
problems another time, but decided against it. "Your homework,
Saotome-san." Once again this stopped Ranma in her tracks. Hinako
hurried on before another interruption could take place. "I am starting
you immediately in a tutoring program. You have to catch up with the rest
of the class if you intend to have any chance of graduating on time. Now,
if you'll wait a moment, I'll pick up my things and walk you home. I
intend to have a talk with your father about this."
Ranma-chan cringed. She figured something like this might be
coming, but had hoped to avoid it somehow. His grades always left him
feeling helpless. He usually resorted to his martial arts skill to solve
his problems, but all the martial arts experience in the world couldn't
help this situation. He just stood there like a trapped animal.
Hinako reached down and picked up the things she had dropped onto
the floor when Happosai had collided with her, among them her unexpected
gift. She rummaged through the package again for any sign of who had sent
her such an unbelievably beautiful piece of jewelry. Nothing turned up.
Hinako smiled. <So, I have a secret admirer>. The thought
pleased Hinako immensely.. Having such a strange metamorphosing body made
dating a difficulty. Frankly, she just wasn't getting any.
Her mind started to wander. It had been awhile since...
Hinako shook her head. <None of that!> She had things to do.
She gathered the rest of her accouterments and motioned for Ranma to
follow her.
They made a quick stop at the school infirmary for hot water.
While they were waiting for the water to heat, Hinako decided to try on
her jewel. It's color contrasted beautifully with her yellow dress and
accentuated her hazel eyes. Even though she was in her adult form, she
giggled girlishly and twirled before the infirmary's mirror.
Ranma emerged a few moments later, once again male; his hair and
shoulder damp. Seeing him walk into the room excited Hinako and she began
to get wet, herself.
She shook her head violently. <What am I thinking?! He's one of
my students!>
She blushed furiously, but tried to cover it. "Well, then Ran-,
er, Saotome-san." she stuttered. "Shall we go?" She left the room before
he could reply.
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Left unnoticed on the floor of the teacher's lounge was a note
which had fallen from the mysterious box:
Dear Hinako,
This is your old friend Kumiko. I'm sending you this
jewel to take care of. Be very careful with it, it
causes unexpected effects. Whatever you do, do not
wear the pendant! It is very dangerous! Please trust
me. I will come to retrieve it in one week.
Your friend,
Kumiko Tanaka
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Ranma and Hinako remained silent on the walk back to the Tendou
dojo. Hinako continually tried to scold Ranma, but each time she started,
another dirty thought would enter her mind and she would snap her mouth
closed. She resolved to ignore him until they reached the dojo, but she
couldn't help sneaking glances at him. This was not good.
She was wearing her usual short dress today, and her panties were
becoming decidedly damp.
What was with her today? She glanced at Ranma again. She
wondered how big his...
The reached the dojo and Ranma showed her inside. Ranma called
out, but no one seemed to be home yet. Ranma shrugged.
"You can wait in the living room if you like."
Hinako turned to Ranma, and had to suddenly clamp down. If she
didn't get him somewhere private soon, she was going to start dripping
down her legs right there! "Actually, where do you usually study?"
"Uhm, in my room, I guess."
<Yes! That is exactly what I had hoped!> Hinako tried to cover
her elation. "Why don't you show it to me? Not all areas are good places
to study." It was a weak excuse, but Ranma seemed oblivious.
"Sure, follow me."
Hinako didn't answer. Her voice was already beginning to waver
with desire. Her breathing was coming fast and hard.
When they reached Ranma's he slid the door open and led her
inside. Once inside she slid the door shut.
"Huh?" Ranma asked in slight confusion.
Hinako pretended to ignored him. He was so adorable with that
baffled look on his face! She glanced around the room as if measuring the
room's standards as a place to study. She moved over to the bed and sat
down. "Ranma, come here."
He was starting to get nervous, but he obeyed.
"Sit down Ranma." She patted the bed next to her.
"Uh..."
"Sit down!" God, she wanted him! Why was she acting this way?
She didn't know, and frankly she didn't care. She was gonna get some of
Ranma if it was the last thing she did. She placed a hand on his thigh.
He jumped slightly, but didn't move from the bed.
"Ranma, have you ever been with a woman?"
Ranma swallowed hard and shook his head vigorously.
Hinako leaned in and lightly kissed Ranma on the mouth. He
shuddered slightly and then began to return the kiss. She opened her
mouth and Ranma thrust his tongue into her mouth. She moved her hand and
began to rub his crotch.
"Ooh, you're already hard."
Ranma could only nod, his eyes bulging.
Hinako moved off the bed, sliding to a seated position in front of
Ranma. She began to untie his pants. Ranma made small strangling noises.
Hinako just continued until she had managed to slide his boxers down
around his ankles. She slowly massaged his stiff rod with her hand.
Ranma moaned, unable contain himself. Hinako gently breathed on his erect
manhood before sliding it into her mouth. She began to take him deeper
and deeper with each motion.
Ranma lost all previous inhibitions. Reaching down he pulled
Hinako up and spread her out on the bed. He pushed her yellow dress up
over her hips and began to massage her damp panties. That lacy, sheer
piece of fabric did little to hide what was underneath. He reached in and
began to kneed her mound. She groaned loudly, exciting him further. He
grabbed her panties drew them off in one quick motion. She twisted and
spread her legs, giving him a view of what was to come. He slowly ran his
tongue down her legs until he could feel her cunt hairs on his cheek.
Knowing from personal experience that he should start at her clitoris, he
used his tongue to explore until he found it. He started flicking her
clit with his tongue and sucking it into his mouth. She arched her hips,
grabbed his head, and crushed it against her hot sex. He kept sucking
gently on her clit, his saliva mixing with her juices, until she was
soaked. Ranma couldn't believe how good she tasted. Leaving her clit he
moved down. Taking a deep breath, he shoved his tongue as far into her
pussy as it would go. She cradled his head with her legs moaning "Oh God,
Ranma! Tongue me!"
Hearing that drove him wild! He began thrusting his tongue in and
out, alternating it with stimulation of her clit. He just couldn't get
enough of it with her moaning how good it felt and kept fucking her cunt
with his tongue.
When she came, it was violently. She bucked madly. Ranma was
surprised and swallowed most of her cum before he realized what was
happening. When he did, he settled in to cleaning her up. Before he
finished, she drew him out.
"I want you in me," she breathed.
It was too much for Ranma. He quickly finished stripping. He was
so hard it almost hurt. She helped him to slide it in. She was so wet
He could feel her pussy milking him of every last drop.
Hinako-sensei sighed.
"We aren't done, yet!" Ranma said.
Hinako gasped as Ranma began thrusting again, pushing it as far in
as it would go. He continued to use his fingers to stimulate her clitoris
with one hand while reaching around with his other to fondle her large
breasts. She moaned as he pinched and massaged her nipples.
God! She was wet!
Somewhere between the constant thrusting and moaning and the
squelching sounds of flesh coated in bodily fluids slapping on each other,
Ranma began to experience a new sensation. Hinako-sensei seemed to be
getting tighter. Ranma looked down.
Oh, no! Hinako-sensei was shrinking. She was turning into her
child form! Ranma tried to pull out, but it was too late. He was stuck!
Suddenly there was a sound downstairs.
<Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!> Someone was home!
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Commercial Break:
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"Come on down and we can work out a deal! These babies are priced
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one!"
....some restrictions may apply....
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Nabiki stared into the shop window.
"Hmmmmm. I need a new cd player." The one she was looking at
was a bit too expensive, but it was more compact that her current one -
and it advertised better sound quality.
"Maybe, I can sell some more pictures to Kuno-chan. Or maybe I
can...," Nabiki continued to mumble money-making ideas to herself when
she heard her name called from behind. She turned around. Kasumi was
standing behind her with basket in hand and emptiness in eyes.
"Oh, Kasumi. Going to see Tofu-sensei?"
Kasumi gave her stock smile. "Just getting back actually. You
wouldn't believe the crowd of people just waiting outside to see
Tofu-san. I told them they could wait inside, but they said it was safer
out there. Strange, neh?"
"Uhm, yeah," Nabiki replied. <Maybe I can sell Tofu a plate of
Kasumi-made food. He'd probably pay through the nose for it.> Nabiki
filed the notion away for further consideration and returned her attention
to her sister. "I'm heading home, also. We can walk together."
Kasumi continued her absent-minded smile. "Hai."
They walked through lower Nerima at a casual pace. The days were
still warm, and perfect for strolling. They stayed silent for most of the
walk home. Nabiki wasn't quite used the serene quite (who would after
living in the Tendou household?). She struck up an idle conversation as
they entered their own residential area.
"So, you stopped at the grocery store?" asked Nabiki. "What did
you get?" She wasn't really interested, but she knew it would keep her
sister busy.
"Just a few things here and there. I'm planning on making
yakisoba tonight. Any preference on what type?"
Nabiki shook her head.
"Well then, I'll just ask father and Mr. Saotome..."
Nabiki just tuned her out. Father and Genma would eat anything
placed in front of them. She continued to daydream and watch the clouds
scutter across the sky. Suddenly, something in Kasumi's chatter caught
her attention.
"...I also picked up some of that candy that Ranma likes. It's
sort of a thank you for saving Akane last night." Kasumi sighed. "What
will we do with that girl?"
Nabiki's eyes lit up at the mention of candy. Ranma's favorite
sweetmeat wasn't (in her opinion) the best type, but it was still good.
She decided to follow Kasumi and see if she could extort some of the
sweets from Ranma. Huntress mode began to kick in.
They soon reached the dojo's entrance and made their way across
the compound. When they reached the door to the main house Kasumi slid
the door open, calling out, "We're home."
An answering thump came from Ranma's room.
"Oh, good. He's home. I'll just take this right up to him,"
Kasumi gushed.
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Ranma looked around frantically. How was he going to get out of
this one? Fear began to well up in him - he could feel the tingling
tickle of hysterical panic rising at the base of his neck. His throat
began to tighten.
"We've got to hide!" Ranma choked.
"Oooh! Hide and seek!"
"No, no! Not hide and seek! Just HIIIDE!"
The now fully child-like Hinako was sitting on...er, in Ranma's
lap. She bounced excitedly.
"Ow! Cut that out!" Ranma could have easily strangled her right
then and there. How could she be so damn cheerful? He could hear someone
coming up the stairs now. He looked frantically about the bedroom. He
didn't keep much stuff so it was primarily barren. The closet? No, not
enough room. The window? No, he couldn't go out there: no clothes and a
naked Hinako-sensei in her under-aged form would not look good to the
neighbors.
Wait a sec. *UNDER-AGED?!* He was gonna get sent to JAIL if he
was caught like this!! That was if he was lucky. He'd probably go
directly to the chair!
His time of indecision and shock had taken too long. There was a
knocking at the door.
"May I come in?" The door opened and Kasumi stepped into the
room. It took a moment for the scene to make an impression on her, but
when it did she froze where she stood in shock, staring at the
compromising position Ranma was in.
"Oh, my."
Nabiki poked her head around the corner. Her mouth made a little
'oh' of surprise. <Money!> she thought. <Lots, and lots of money!>
"Wait right there, Ranma! I have to get my camera." Nabiki took
off racing down the hall.
"No, wait!" Ranma called out frantically, but it was too late.
This whole situation was going downhill fast. He was sweating badly and
his eyes were clearly showing white around the edges. He had to do
something, but what?
He had to get out of Hinako, and fast. He could manage it if she
used her life-drain technique to return to normal size, or maybe they
could use some kind of lubricant to slide it out, or maybe...
Of course! Cold water! If he transformed into a woman, he would
no longer have a...uhm...that is...well he wouldn't *be* in this position
- stuck inside his pre-teen teacher. He picked up Hinako and made a mad
dash for the bathroom. As he passed the stunned Kasumi, he could hear her
mumble, "I brought you some candy."
"Candy?!?" Hinako's voice piped up. She made a leap for the bag
in Kasumi's arms.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Ranma shrieked. "What are you trying
to do, pull it off?!?"
"Candy!"
"Cold water!"
"*Candy!*"
"*Cold water!*"
"CANDY!!"
"COLD WATER!!"
Hinako made the decision for them both: she leapt for the bag
again. Ranma screamed and nearly passed out. He was yanked along behind
Hinako like a dog on a tether. She grabbed the bag from Kasumi, ripped
it open, and began to stuff the candy down as fast as she could.
"Yummy! Yummy! Yummy! Yummy! Yummy!"
Ranma managed to recover enough so that the room stopped spinning.
He still felt nauseous, but he could handle that; he had eaten enough of
Akane's cooking. He picked up the childish Hinako, candy and all, and
stumbled down the stairs to the bathroom.
"Yum! Yum! Yum! Yum! Yum!"
He flung open the door to the laundry room and rushed through.
Reaching the door to the bathroom he threw it open as well...to find a
construction crew performing repairs on the tub.
"Giiiiaaaaaahhh!" Ranma squealed in surprise. Since when had a
construction crew been repairing the bathroom??!!
He turned and sprinted back out into the hall.
One of the crewman turned slowly to the man on his left. "Was
that some guy and an underage girl, Bert?" he drawled.
"Ayuh. I do believe that's what it was, Ralph." his friend
replied.
"I thought so." They turned back to their work.
As Ranma reached the hall, Nabiki careened around a corner waving
her camera.
"I found it! Now, Ranma, just hold still-"
"Yaaahhh!" Ranma plunged through one of the thin rice-paper house
walls and fell into the dining room. A flash of light from Nabiki's
camera illuminated the hallway behind him.
"Ranma! You get back here! You'll have to pay for that waste of
film!"
Genma and Soun were strangely absent from their traditional spots.
The empty shogi board was still present, however, which meant they could
not be too far off. They must have returned recently. The juvenile
Hinako continued to make happy munching noises, completely oblivious to
the chaos around her.
Ranma had to think fast. The pond! If he could just make it to
the pond without being spotted. He looked outside...and saw more workmen
with their hard-hats and styrofoam cups of coffee, just standing around
watching the turmoil unfold before them through the open wall.
"Uwaaaaaahhhhhh!" Where the *hell* did all these workers come
from?!
One of the workers in the courtyard turned to his hard-hatted
friend. "Your right Bert, it is easier to see the action out here."
His friend nodded. "Told you. Say, Ralph, your house this
interesting?"
"Not by a long shot, Ralph."
"You ever wish it was?"
"Hell, no."
They both sipped their coffee.
Ranma dashed for the kitchen. If he could just get some cold
water from the sink, he would be okay! He passed through the doorway,
only to find himself facing Soun and Genma. Ranma screeched to a halt.
Both of the men were turned away from Ranma, rooting through the contents
of Kasumi's shopping basket.
"I prefer beef yakisoba." Soun said.
"Tendou, my friend, you have been misguided. Chicken yakisoba is
the only true food of the martial artist."
Soun straightened. "Genma, my old and trusted friend, I think
that your head has been hit too many..."
"Is that pork?" Genma asked, continuing to sort through the
baskets contents. "Pork is good."
Soun dipped down again. "Of course pork is good."
"The other white martial arts meat!" they chorused.
Ranma turned, about to break for it when he saw Nabiki storming up
behind him. She already had the camera ready. He jumped backward and,
seeing no other alternative, leapt onto the two fathers' heads, shoving
them down into the basket. He crashed through the window, the pre-
pubescent Hinako still held in his lap...uh, arms.
By the time that Nabiki had reached the broken window, he was
already gone from sight.
"Now where could he have gotten to?"
Soun and Genma still stood, bent over with their heads mashed into
the basket.
"Is that duck meat, Soun my friend?"
"I believe you may be on to something."
They continued to root...
Ranma sat on top of the dojo's roof. What was he to do now? He
was naked and embarrassingly attached to a juvenile Hinako-sensei.
<*Shimatta!* This is not good!> He glanced up from where he sat, his
gaze roaming the view. <Now what do I do?>
His heart suddenly jumped into his throat. Down the street from
the dojo Akane and a group of her friends were walking this way. <Not
good. *Not good*. If Akane sees me like this, I'm *dead*!>
He looked around. <Cold water. Gotta find some cold water.> He
couldn't believe this. Any other time of the year he gets randomly
splashed with cold water. Now, when he needs it the most, he can't find
any!
"Aaargh! The fates are cursing me! As if I weren't already
cursed enough! Someone up there must really be laughing."
Hinako had finished off the candy and was staring at her hands.
"Yuck. Sticky." She began to wipe her hands on his legs.
"Hey, stop that!" he cried. She ignored him, her hands leaving
gooey smears down his legs.
He had to change and fast. Akane had almost reached the point
where she would be inside the dojo's grounds. Well, there was only one
option that he could see. He ran to the edge of the roof and leapt wildly
into the air...
...and landed with a cold splash right in the middle of the dojo's
koi pond.
Akane walked through the dojo's gate to find the (surprisingly
unremarkable) scene of a naked female Ranma and a young Hinako-sensei
standing in the middle of the pond. A group of drenched construction
workers stood around with styrofoam cups and huge eyes, ogling the two
girls.
"What is going on?!" she exploded. "And stop staring you
perverts!" She pulled a mallet out of hammerspace (that's right,
hammerspace! So stop speculating...perverts) and proceeded to pound each
of the workers into a mangled pulp.
She turned to Ranma. "And you, you pervert!" She raised the
oversized love tapper.
Ranma backed up, holding her hands defensively in front of her.
"It's not what you think!"
"It isn't?" She approached menacingly. "Then what are you doing
naked with Hinako-sensei in our pond?"
Ranma turned to see Hinako splashing through the pond, chasing the
brightly colored koi in circles.
"Uuuhhh..."
A sudden flash of bright light caught the both of them by
surprise.
"Ha! Gotcha!" Nabiki stood with her camera in hand, and a
mischievous look on her face. "If you want the picture, I want five
thousand yen."
"Five thousand?! Are you insane?!"
"Plus a 20% tax."
"Tax?! What for?"
Nabiki arced an eyebrow. "Make that 25%."
Ranma choked. He was about to make a rude retort when he realized
(slowly) that Nabiki wasn't actually charging him for the picture, but
rather to keep quiet about being naked with Hinako (when he was still
male). He looked at Akane. Being naked with Hinako while in his female
form was going to take enough explaining as it was.
Suddenly, a small black shape floated into the compound. It was
Happosai, still drained of his chi.
"Akane-chan!" Happosai exclaimed, while trying to glomp onto her
chest as he floated past. He paused in mid-glomp, suddenly seeing Ranma.
"Ranma-chan!" His eyes became large and watery while sparkles
filled the air. "Kawaii!" he cried as he weakly leapt for Ranma's well-
endowed chest.
"You filthy pervert!" Ranma cried as she smashed Happosai into the
ground. She was preparing to boot him airborne when an idea came to her.
"It was Happosai!" She cried. "He stole our clothes and then
knocked us into the pond in order to make me female."
Akane grabbed Happosai from Ranma. "You filthy old man!" She
proceeded to pound Happosai within an inch of his life before knocking him
into low earth orbit. A weak "Hidoi" could be heard floating back to
group as he shot away through the stratosphere.
Akane turned back to Ranma. "What are you doing still naked? Get
some clothes on you pervert!" She raised her enormous wooden pulverizer
and...
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Ranma sat with his head resting gently on his desk, asleep. He
twitched slightly and drool pooled under his mouth. He went unnoticed by
most of the class, but not the most important person -
"Wake up, Ranma Saotome!"
Ranma jerked upright in his chair. Everyone in the classroom
turned to stare at him.
"I will see you after class, Ranma. Now go stand in the hall."
Things were not going well for him. But then, things never seemed
to go well for him.
Last night had started with Ryouga attempting to kill him
(again!), then Akane had been kidnapped, and now this strange dream...
******************* ~~~~~~~ *******************
Now, I swear I wrote this before reading Uncle Fester's Nekophilia...I
swear! Ah, well...no one ever believes me anyway.
Well, that's it. I hoped you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing
it. This is my first fanfic, so all C&C is VERY welcome. Please be kind.
I admit it was a little long winded in parts, but...well, I'm practicing
my writing skills. There is no need to email me about what a truly
horrible ending this was. Believe me, I *know* it was bad. I just
couldn't let a plot as bad as this one be anything other than a dream. As
for anything else...
Send all comments to: knudson@u.washington.edu
Quick Notes:
Hidoi - (said by Happosai before being knocked into orbit) means
'cruel' or 'awful'. This is one of his more common sayings.
Gomennassai - 'I'm sorry' (ultra-polite form)
Kawaii - Cute
Shimatta - Dammit! Nuts! (General curse of surprise or distaste)
Yakisoba - a pretty generic noodle dish with vegetables and meat
Notes:
1) When Nabiki charged Ranma five thousand yen, that's about forty
dollars. With the tax it comes to a total of fifty dollars. Maybe
this was too much to charge Ranma, but well, I did it anyway.
2) I know the names for the construction crew weren't Japanese, but I
don't know which Japanese names are thought of as 'average joe' names.
And even had I used Japanese 'average joe' names, would you have known?
Notes for Purists:
1) Many teachers have their mail routed to their school. Many housing
areas in Japan don't have mail-boxes, instead they have post-office
boxes. Rather than make a trip to the local P.O., teachers have mail
sent to their school for them. This is why Hinako-sensei is able to
pick her mail up there.