Greetings, all.

Here's part two.  Once again, I'm still getting used to writing Ranma,
and any comments would be extremely welcome.  Thanks.

Many thanks to those who have C&C'd the previous parts of this.  You
know who you are.

Stormy : Too lazy to look up all their names, Douglas?

Me: *glaring at Stormy, who only grins.*  Will you stay out of this?!

Anyway, on to the show!
Douglas A. Reeves <dougreeves@earthlink.net> presents . . .      

     It took Ryouga two full days to find Ucchan's, and when he got
there he discovered that the shop was closed.  He was about to walk
away when he heard Ukyou call out to him.
     "Don't leave, please."  Her voice was soft and tentative, and
hollow.  The confidence that usually underlay her words was absent
entirely.  Turning, he saw her standing in the doorway; she looked
very much like she sounded.  She was a bit disheveled, with her hair
falling loose and unkempt into her face.  Redness in her eyes showed
that she had been crying.
     <She looks as bad as I do,> he thought, and decided to stay and
talk.

     Ukyou poured each of them some tea and sat across the table from
him.  For several moments they sat in silence, until she finally
asked, "So, how are you holding up?"
     Ryouga shook his head, eyes downcast.
     "Still blaming yourself?"
     Ryouga looked up.  "How . . . ?"
     "I heard you at the funeral," she answered dryly.  "It showed."
     "I don't understand," he answered, a puzzled look on his face.
     "All that poetry you spouted about Ranchan's honor," she rolled
her eyes.  "That last line especially.  I don't buy it . . . not from
you."
     Ryouga turned red with mixed anger and embarrassment, "You don't
know the things I've done."  
     "Then tell me.  Nobody's perfect, and locking it up inside never
helps."

*********************************************************************

                         Tainted Honor
      A Ranma Nibbunnoichi fanfiction by Douglas A. Reeves
*********************************************************************
                       
Chapter Two - The Shadow of the Past (with all due respect to J.R.R.
Tolkien)
    
     "I . . . I can't," he protested, sitting farther back in his
chair.
     "Sure you can, sugar," she urged, her voice soothing.
     "I . . . ." he hung his head.  "I've been taking advantage of
Akane.  I . . . used my curse--"
     "Curse?" she cut him off, suddenly curious.  "What curse?"     
Ryouga sighed.  "I . . . used to turn into a little black pig."
     Ukyou's jaw dropped, and Ryouga could feel her stare burning
into him.  It made him angry.  "That's why I couldn't say it!" he
shouted at her, pushing away from the table and turning to leave. 
"Now you think I'm--"
     "Nobody's thinking anything about you, Ryouga," she answered him
calmly. <Except you,> she added mentally.
     He turned, still a little angry.  "Then why did you gape at me
like that?"
     "I just . . . ." she searched for the most inoffensive
explanation, "it surprised me, okay?  I mean, I probably should have
figured it out, but it caught me off guard."
     Ryouga was still angry, but he accepted the explanation.  After
all, his curse had provoked far worse reactions.  Begrudgingly, he
slumped back into his chair.
     "Now I know why you said all that," Ukyou sighed, collecting
herself for another try at cheering him up.  "Still, you went on the
trip with Ranchan.  Why?"
     "I wanted a cure," he answered automatically.
     "So you didn't want to be P-chan anymore, right?"
     "Right . . . ." his voice trailed off.
     Ukyou persisted.  "We've all done some bad things, Ryouga.  You
have, I sure have . . . even Ranchan wasn't perfect."
     "But I . . . ." 
     She cut him off, talking very quickly now, trying to be
persuasive. "Honor isn't perfection.  Honor is admitting our
mistakes, and doing what we can to make them right.  You said
something like that yourself, yesterday."
     Ryouga started to protest again, but stopped himself.  Ukyou had
the answer, he realized.  He had to make things right.  "I have to
tell Akane, don't I?" he asked, suddenly looking twice as miserable.
     Ukyou nodded sympathetically.  "Yes . . . you probably should. 
I know it won't be easy, though."
     "I can't do it."
     "You can," Ukyou lightly placed her hand on his shoulder, trying
to reassure him.  "Maybe not now, but sometime, you can.  And you
will, because you ARE an honorable person, Ryouga."
     "No.  Not yet I'm not," was his whispered response.

                       * * * * * * * * *
                                
     CRACK! Another block splintered under Akane's attack, bringing
the count to fifteen, but she still didn't feel any better.  Sighing,
she moved to pick up yet another.  Mechanically, she took it from the
pile, carried it over, and set it in place.  Preparing to strike, she
let the anger and sadness flow through her, driving her--
     "Akane, don't," a quiet voice interrupted her ritual, and she
froze.  The pent-up anger seethed inside her, ready to unleash itself
upon the intruder, and she spun quickly to face  . . .
     . . . Nabiki.  The middle sister of the Tendou clan stood in the
doorway.  Her usual predatory appearance had evaporated, replaced by
compassion , caution . . . and fear. <Am I so frightening,> Akane
asked herself, <that even my own sister is afraid to approach me?>
     Nabiki's voice, hesitant and quiet, interrupted that thought. 
"Akane, don't do this to yourself."
     Akane bowed her head, her anger fleeing her.  "Sister," she
whispered.
     "Listen, Akane . . . you can't hide from the pain, you can't run
from it, and you can't lock it up inside."  She paused, as if
reluctant to say the next words.  "Not unless you want to end up like
me."
     Akane's head snapped back up, and she started to protest, but
Nabiki reached out and touched a finger to her lips.  "Shhh . . . I'm
not finished yet.  You see . . . when mother died, I couldn't take
it.  It just . . . it hurt too much, so I tried to ignore it.  I
tried to pretend it wasn't there.  I got used to hiding my feelings,
to being cold.  Now look at me; the facade has taken over.  Don't do
what I did," she finished pleadingly, "please."
     Akane was too stunned to speak, and her gaze fell to the floor
again.  "Sister," she finally whispered.  "I . . . don't know what to
say."  Nabiki had never opened up like this before, never let her
guard down.  Akane wanted to help her, but had no idea how.
     "Then don't.  Just remember."
     "Thank you."
     Nabiki nodded, then turned to go.  At the doorway, she stopped. 
"Don't tell anyone about this, okay?  Especially not Kasumi." 
Suddenly, the mask was back on.
     Akane smirked wryly, "Right."

                       * * * * * * * * *
                            
     Ryouga growled at himself; he was lost again.  How was he
supposed to protect Akane if he could never find her?  On the other
hand, perhaps it was better that way.
     He turned over the things that Ukyou had told him in his mind. 
She was right, of course; he had to face what he had done, to
apologize to Akane.
     He couldn't.  She would hate him forever, and he simply couldn't
deal with that.
     He had to.  Honor demanded it.  Cursing under his breath, he
removed a map from his pack.  By whatever tainted honor he had left,
he would find her.

Several days later . . .
     Akane was again in the dojo, working on forms this time, when
Ryouga arrived.  Entranced by the simple beauty of her movements, he
slipped inside and sat down by the door, watching her silently.  It
was several minutes before he could bring himself to speak.
     "Hello, Akane."
      She stopped and turned to face him.  "Hello.  I didn't see you
come in."
     He smiled slightly.  "You . . . you're so beautiful that I had
to sit and watch you for a while."
     "Why . . . thank you, Ryouga."  She returned the smile, blushing
slightly.  For several moments, and awkward silence fell over them,
neither knowing what to say.
     Finally, Ryouga spoke.  "I'm sorry I've been away.  I'm afraid I
got a little lost."
     "That's all right," she responded.  "I talked to Ukyou
yesterday, and she said that you had been by her place."
     He stiffened a little at that.  "You talked to . . . ?"
     She nodded, sadness in her eyes.  "Yeah.  Since Ranma . . . died
. . . there's no reason for us to hate each other anymore, so we talk
sometimes.  It helps a little."
     "I see.  I wish I had someone to talk to like that," he
lamented.
     She sat down in front of him.  "You can always talk to me,
Ryouga."
     He smiled slightly, then suddenly frowned.
     "What's wrong?" she asked, concerned.  "I know; you still feel
like it's your fault that Ranma died."
     He nodded slightly, though that really wasn't what was bothering
him.
     Akane closed her eyes, and when she opened them they glistened
with tears, "Ryouga, it's not your fault.  You didn't even have to
go, and you can't blame yourself for what happened."
     His heart fell through the floor, her proclamation of his
innocence stinging more deeply than any outright accusation.  She had
such faith in him. <If only you knew, Akane.> Looking into her eyes,
he said, "I . . . I just want you to be happy, Akane.  If saving
Ranma would have made you happy, I wish I . . . ." he began to cry
softly.
     Akane took his hands between hers, holding them, trying to
comfort him.  He was so kind, and yet she knew that there was
something more that she wasn't seeing.  Ryouga had some kind of pain
bottled up inside that he wouldn't let out; it reminded her of her
sister's words days ago.  She wanted desperately to help him with it,
but she could see that he wasn't going to tell her.      There was
only one thing she could do, and that was to be there for him, as he
had been there for her.
 
                       * * * * * * * * *
                                
     Ryouga sat beneath a tree in the front yard, head bowed, with
thoughts he didn't want to think filling his head.  He had resolved
not to move until Akane returned, for fear of becoming lost again,
but sitting and thinking was killing him.  Silently he cursed his
weakness, which had allowed him to do things he knew were
dishonorable.  He cursed Jusenkyo, for the pig-body which had made it
possible.  He scarcely restrained himself from cursing Ranma, for not
telling Akane and ending the charade, but he had forced the promise
from Ranma, so the blame fell back to him again.
     His thoughts were interrupted by a voice from above, and he
looked up to see Nabiki standing over him. 
     "Hey, Ryouga, you're just the guy I wanted to see."
     "Oh?" he answered dubiously.  Being sought after by Nabiki was
often not a good thing.  Still, whatever she had in store for him
couldn't be any worse than the ghosts in his head, he decided.  "What
do you need?"
     "Well, I couldn't help but notice that you and Akane have been
talking a lot lately.  That's good . . . she needs that right now."
     He nodded his agreement, wondering where this line of discussion
was leading.
     "So I thought I might be able to help you out a little."     
Ryouga looked at her skeptically.  "What *kind* of help did you have
in mind?" he asked, almost afraid of the answer.
     Nabiki felt a little insulted, but quickly put that feeling
aside.  She'd gotten used to this reaction, and she had to admit that
her reputation was well-earned.  That, in fact, was why she was doing
this to begin with.  "Well, you need a place to stay, right?"
     He looked up at the tree he was sitting under, thought a second,
then nodded.  Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was making
a deal with the devil.
     "Well, if you'd be willing to help out around here, I could
probably talk Daddy into letting you use the extra room.  I mean, I
can convince him that you're good for Akane, and he'll do anything."
     "I don't know . . . ." he said reluctantly.  Nabiki just didn't
offer you things like this. "What's the catch?"
     Nabiki sighed.  "No catch, and no charge; however, there is one
thing you *will* do for me, whether you accept this offer or not."
     He didn't like the way she said that; her tone had bordered on
command.  When she continued, he liked it even less.
     "You will tell Akane about your curse."
     "Curse?" he verbally backpedaled, "What curse?"
     "Don't play stupid with me, Ryouga," she said firmly, her eyes
narrowing.  "I *know* about you and P-chan.  If you don't tell her, I
will.  You really don't want me to do that."
     A sudden chill came over him as he considered the implications 
     "I'll give you two weeks.  Do consider that offer, though.  The
more you help her now, the more likely it is that she'll forgive you. 
Of course, if *I* have to tell her . . . ."  She let the sentence
trail off as she turned and walked away, leaving him to consider the
possibilities.
 
************
End Part Two
    
         
    

-- 
***********************************************************
Douglas A. Reeves <dougreeves@earthlink.net>
Bubblegum Crisis fan and writer of fanfiction
Storm Warnings - http://web2.airmail.net/a0011387/
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Well, they are lucky.  Let them be
 nine-lived and contradictory,
 curious enough to change, prepared to pay
 the cat price, which is to die
 and die again and again,
 each time with no less pain.
 A cat minority of one
 is all that can be counted on
 to tell the truth.  And what cats have to tell
 on each return from hell
 is this; that dying is what the living do,
 that dying is what the loving do,
 and that dead dogs are those who do not know
 that dying is what, to live, each has to do."

		-- from "Curiosity", by Alastair Reid
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