<The picture fades in with the "ditditdit-di-ditdit" of a 
news program announcing late breaking news. The scene the 
camera focuses on is not a pretty sight, as what appears 
to be a whirlwind swirls around inside an office. Papers 
and various office supplies fly around, and occasionally a 
scream can be heard issuing from within the storm, as a 
hand or leg occasionally is seen through the debris.>

<Ukyo Kounji steps out in front of the camera, carrying a 
microphone and a sheaf of papers. Mysteriously, she seems 
unruffled by the torrent of wind behind her.>

Ukyo: Good evening members of the FFML, I've been asked to 
read this statement by the author of Purple Haired 
Destiny, as he is ah... (she glances back at the tornado) 
currently unable to do so himself.

Ukyo<reading off the papers>: Ahem, 'I know this comes at 
a bad time, after Lurker's announcement that he was 
putting 'Faux Existence' on hold, and I know that I had 
promised to have PHD 3 out this week, but life's been 
really hectic and it's been delayed...'

<Ukyo roles her eyes, and mutters something about good-
for-nothing authors>

Ukyo<continuing>:'But fear not! It is not being delayed 
for any length of time, I'm still working on it, just not 
as fast as I thought I was going to be. And it's going to 
be a *heck* of a big chapter... I'm already 25 pages into 
it, and no where close to done. Anyway, thank you to all 
of you who volunteered to be pre-readers, I have your 
names on file, and will contact you as soon as I have a 
bit more done.'

Ukyo<putting aside the papers>:Well folks, there you have 
it...

<Shampoo steps onto the screen, with her back facing the 
camera as she watches the whirlwind>

Ukyo: Shampoo! What are you doing here?

Shampoo<turning around and noticing Ukyo for the first 
time.>: I have no idea, actually... I just came to see 
what all the fuss was, and why PHD 3 was being delayed so 
long. I mean, really, Ryan promised he'd write me as the 
main character in this story, but he's just not writing 
fast enough... I want to hurry up and get to the good 
parts!

<Ukyo's jaw drops, as she just stares at Shampoo>

Ukyo: Shampoo? Is that really you?

Shampoo: Of course its me, silly, who else in this story 
has purple hair?

Ukyo<quits gaping>: But... your speech! You just spoke in 
perfect Japanese!

Shampoo<nods>: Of course! What, you think I talk like that 
all the time? The author is too busy to bother messing up 
my speech right now.

Ukyo: But.. I mean... Your speech *has* been improving... 
it was pretty bad in PHD 1, and a bit better in PHD 2, but 
now its perfect! How is that possible!

Shampoo<shrugs>: Dunno... I image it will either be 
explained in PHD 3 or I'll still be speaking funny 
again... You know, a lot of my fans think my speech is 
cute...

Ukyo<rolling her eyes>: Yeah... sssssuuuurrrrreee....

<The two sit down at a table that was there the whole time 
though you never noticed it, still paying no attention to 
the massive cyclone just behind them. They both pick up 
cups of tea which are just mysteriously there.>

Shampoo: So, wasn't this suppose to be a teaser of some 
sort? I mean, we haven't even mentioned the title of the 
fic yet.

Ukyo: I know, this is sure a weird way to get people to 
read a fic... but then you're this Ryan guy's favorite 
character, so who knows how messed up he is?

Shampoo: Hey! No cheap shots at the author while he's 
away, who knows what he'd do to your character if he found 
out?

Ukyo<blanches>: hmm... true, true...

<both girls sit quietly for a few moments, drinking their 
tea.>

Shampoo: So... who do you think is going to get Ranma?

Ukyo<looks startled at Shampoo's question, and a bit 
flustered>: Ah... Who knows? I mean, the story is about 
you, right? And Ranma seems to have really warmed up to 
you...

Shampoo<looking away>: True... but he still hasn't 
forgiven me yet, I can tell... and he forgave you so 
easily!

<Shampoo's fist clenches>

Shampoo: It's just so unfair! I never get Ranma!

<Ukyo looks over at Shampoo with a concerned look on her 
face>

Ukyo: Aww... I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure you'll 
get him in this one. And who knows? Maybe it'll start a 
trend...

<Shampoo relaxes a little and takes a drink of her tea>

Shampoo: You're just saying that... I mean, you actually 
do get him in a few fics...

Ukyo<incredulously>: Yeah, right, like one in every ten-
million... hey, at least we're pretty much assured that 
Akane's not going to get him in this fic!

Shampoo<smiling>: Yeah! Thank the Kami! I'd rather 
_Kodachi_ get him than Akane...

Ukyo<giggling>: At least with the Kuno's he'd just need to 
build up an immunity to poisons! 

<Both girls share a laugh at the thought of Ranma living 
under the same roof as Kodachi and Tatewaki, then quiet 
down, drinking their tea.>

Ukyo<pensively>: Hey Shampoo, does this seem weird to you? 
The two of us just sitting here, talking like we're the 
best of friends or something?

<Shampoo suddenly looks up, shocked.>

Shampoo: You... (old habits die hard) You're right! I 
mean, we weren't exactly at each other's throats at the 
end of PHD 2, but we weren't exactly close either! What do 
you suppose it means?

Ukyo: Well, this is a teaser...

---

COMING TO AN FFML NEAR YOU:

Purple Haired Destiny Chapter 3: Of Misguided Quests and 
Misguided Souls!!

I'm working on it! Really!!

Ryan
andersor@cs.colorado.edu
http://ucsu.colorado.edu/~andersor/fanfic/fanfic.html
http://ucsu.colorado.edu/~andersor/tenchi/ryoko.html