Brazil wrote:

                           A NECESSARY STEP

                   or: What if Tenchi had a spine?

  G.T.---I think I can speak for all of coliding SYmphonies when I say,
Tenchi is cool. I liked this story, though Aeka seemd somehow ooc in her
speech frame. Worth a ten minute dissecting, though.
-------

Allan---Yes I like Tenchi, but every ANime I watch or Manga I read, I
think what if something went this way instead of that? This isn't the
best of the alternates I've read, but it is -very- far from the worst. I
hope this series moves well.
------
Trevor---used the 1st What if factor. What if the spineless
protagonist(or is it antagonist) got a backbone? (2nd is take a
character out, or kill off) While this isn't nessesarily a bad thing, it
does tend to loan to simple ideas for the storyboard; a matter of
following through a regular day with the new personality. NO new plot
really.
Good prose. Descriptive. Keep it up.

-----
Eimi- language usage is hard for me to understand--leave me confused. I
know my english is bad but story word usage is not very---watery,
fluidy, liquidy.
--
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