On Fri, 13 Jun 1997, John Fiala wrote:

Hello, all, and welcome to the finale of the Nameless Sequel.


	First off, 'Wow!'  I really liked this episode, and seeing
things come to an end.

Well... not exactly "come to an end".
 

	However, I'm getting really tired of anime fanfic writers
putting in references to Pulp Fiction.  It's a marvelous movie, I enjoy
it a lot, but it's getting a little heavy handed.  Consider this a
warning. :)

Aw, ya can never have too many PF references. ;) I got four or so.

---+
	Soun: (chewing) Wonderful chicken, Kasumi.

	Kasumi: (smiling) Duck, father. It's duck. 

	Soun: Wonderful duck, then.

	(Ranma looks slightly bothered, as if by something he can't
quite 
	place.)
---+
	I may be sick...  

Not on the carpet, please. ;)

---+
	Scrolling Text: (in a nifty, Tom Clancy-like teletype effect) US

	DEEP SPACE INCURSION PREVENTION INSTALLATION (USDSPI), 
	IDAHO, MT. BADASS, 0023 HOURS

	Officer 1: (clipped tones) The object has cleared the orbit of
Mars, 
	sir.

	General: Does it conform to the specs of any of the 235 races we

	know of?

	Officer 2: No sir. We've never seen anything like it. Should I
have 
	the fleet move out from behind Venus?
---+
	Our tax dollars at work.  

"Where'd the money come from?"
"Come on. Did you really believe they spent that much on a toilet seat?"

---+
	General: Right. Get me ComPac on the horn, I want to speak to 
	CINCPac.

	Officer 3: ComPac is being repainted, General, and CINCPac is in

	labor at the moment.

	General: (incredulous) Admiral Arthur MacMarlon is in _labor_, 
	soldier? Are you aware of the penalties for drug abuse on duty?

	Officer 3: (apologetically) He took a goodwill tour to China
about 
	a year ago, and was visiting these cursed springs....

	General: (disgusted) The NinComPac.
---+

	John falls on the floor, laughing, banging his head into
furniture so that he can stop laughing and breathe again.  "Excellent."

Old joke. New twist.

---+
	Priest: There's a demon from Hell chewing on the Holy Book.

	Akari: (mortified) Katsunishiki! STOP THAT THIS INSTANT!
---+

	Q: What does a two ton sumo pig eat?
	A: Anything it wants to.

Within reason.

	***

	The commentary switches to a TV news studio, where Fuu and Uni
from Magic Knight RayEarth are sitting on the set, being reporters.

Slander!

	Uni: ...And so it turns out I've won the fencing match for the
fifth year in a row.  That's Sports.  Fuu-chan?

	Fuu: Thank you Uni-chan.  (turns to camera)  And now we go to
our live reporter, Hikaru-chan, on the scene in Nerima, where the end of
the world is apparently already in progress.

	<<Camera cuts to show Hikaru-chan, who looks like a very cute
and young Ranma-chan, holding a microphone.  Behind her is 'Our Lady of
Grevious Pain And Suffering'>>

	Hikaru: Thanks!  <Kawaii smile>  Well, here I am at the
Kuno-Tendo joint wedding in Nerima.  Here's some footage we've already
recorded.

---+
	Man: We're here for the alien invasion.

	Nabiki: That's down at the Presbyterian Church. This is the 
	wedding of Soun and Kasumi Tendo.
---+

	Hikaru: For a moment, I thought I was in the wrong place!

Nope. Alien invasion, wedding, same thing.

---+
	Tsung: (astounded) You mean both of you are _also_ isolated 
	Chinese warlords with a arrogant, imperious air, a horde of 
	powerful minions, a neat-looking palace, and a spectacular 
	martial arts special technique that seemed unbeatable until you 
	fought Ranma Saotome?

	Herb and Kirin: Why, yes.

	Tsung: (thoughtful) We are interested by this.
---+

	Hikaru:  And this reporter would now like to predict the
downfall of communism in china...

Of course, given the number of Chinese scenes in Ranma that _aren't_
communist, this may have already happenned. And the cross Chinese borders
awful easy, too...

---+
	Cloaked Figure 1: You see? There is no danger to your planet.
Your 
	puny race is not about to be wiped out by the awesome power of 
	the T'Kraal Empire.
---+
	Hikaru: <<Uber-Kawaii smile>>  And isn't that a relief?

*sigh* Scary thing is, many TV reporters are actully like this. Thank Bob
for the Print Media.

---+
	Cloaked Figure 1: I think he suspects.

	Cloaked Figure 2: Signal the lead ship to move into atmospheric 
	position.

	Cloaked Figure 3: Pass the bacon-balls.
---+

	Hikaru: These gentlemen are really great. I love how polite they
are.  Most aliens, travelling lightyears to attend a wedding and invade
the earth, don't take the time to learn the customs of the planet they
plan to havest.  <slight frown on face, staring up in the sky>  Like
some Cloud-nebulans I could mention...

Well, you know them cloud nebula boys...

---+
	Saburo: It's 30 miles to Nerima. We've got a full tank of gas, a

	carton of okonomiyaki, there's an alien spaceship hanging over
the 
	city, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.

	(They think this over for all of a nanosecond.)

	Ranma and Saburo: (together) Hit it.
---+
	Hikaru: The producer would like to mention that he does,
however, approve of gratuitous Blues Brother references.

As well he should.

----+
	Kasumi: The earth part is incorrect. It is a Vk'dargh crystal 
	sculpture.

	Nabiki: (reading tag) To Kasumi, new Native Planetary Governor, 
	from the Empire.
---+
	Hikaru:  And much congratulations to our new Planetary Governor.
Earlier today, I interviewed her.

	<<Cut to interior of church.  Hikaru is interviewing Kasumi.>>
	Hikaru:  Any new planetary policies you intend to start?

	Kasumi: <smile>  Oh, I wouldn't want to upset all of those
leaders out there by telling them how to run thier countries!

	Hikaru: <smiles back>  Oh, I'm sure they're very happy to hear
that.

	Kasumi:  <slight worried look>  Unless, of course, they don't
start washing behind their ears.

	<< Back to exterior of the church>>
	Hikaru;  And so I believe the new Planetary Governer's basic
policy is: Personal Hygene or Else!

*laugh* Yup.

---+
	(The cat rips the bear apart in a shower of blood, and playfully

	begins to chew through a lamppost.)
---+

	Hikaru: <eyes big, body going SD>> HOW KAWAII!!!

O.o;;;;;
 

---+
	Zen: (annoyed) No, I mean Tendou Akane! The devil in human form!

	She'll...

	(Akane mallets the monk into LEO, where he bounces nicely off
the 
	hull of the spacecraft.)

	Ryoga: (unhearing) SAOTOME, TODAY IS THE DAY I CRUSH..

	(He collides with a group of people and they go down in a tangle
of 
	arms and legs.)

	Ryoga: (trying to sit up) Uh, sorry...

	Herb: (sorting out his arms) Clumsy oaf!

	Tsung: (standing up) YOU! THE INFIDEL!

	Kirin: (irate) Has the cur insulted you, friend Tsung?

	Ryoga: (small voice) uh-oh.
---+

	Nabiki: Bets?  Bets?  Ryouga vs. The Warlords of China!  3-2
odds on Ryouga!

A bit high, there...

---+
	Shampoo: (eyes glowing) Dead men file no lawsuits! 
---+

	Nabiki: <pale>  Um... gotta go!

*smirk*

---+

	Well, after this it gets kinda confusing.  I liked it though...
especially with Felix being transported to Neptune.  We shouldn't see
him until...oh,  August, at least!

Or at least until the epilogue

	Keep up the good work.  I hope the date with Ukyou shows up in
the epiloge!

It does.

-john
"What do you do if a Terrorist throws a pin at you?
     Run!  He's got a grenade in his mouth!"
jcfiala@cssltd.com