Dimension 6
Part 3
Michelle Ramos

MIKE: OK, we can do this...

    The lights disappeared and then it was clear. There stood the machine,
scratched yes, but still ready to fight.

CROW: Thanks for reminding us.  We really can't remember what happened twenty seconds ago.

    Jupiter and Venus both collapsed. "I'm so exhausted," Jupiter said
tiredly.

TOM: As she tiredly flopped down on the tired bed in a tired manner.

    "I can't fight anymore," Venus claimed. 

MIKE: Everyone knew she was holding back, though.

								And with that they both
detransformed. Mars and Mercury began to regain consciousness, only having
enough strength to leap over to their friends before detransformation
themselves.

TOM: From where, the Dark Kingdom?

    "Geez, this guy must be stronger than Queen Beryl!" Darien exclaimed.

CROW: Oh, and he would know?

    "I guess I need to use the Crystal, then," Sailor Moon said with a
determined voice.

TOM <bored>: No.  Don't.  You'll die.

    "No, don't. 

MIKE: Wow.  Good call, Servo.

			You know what could happen. There's got to be another way."

CROW: I've tried for eighty years.  Believe me, captain, there is no other way.
MIKE: Right, I call no more Star Trek Generations refs.

    Then a voice chimed in, "That's why I was born, Tuxedo Mask. He's MY

TOM: Lover!

enemy,
so only I can handle him." Valerie jumped down from her perch on the roof,

TOM: Where she'd been waiting for all of two seconds.

next to the couple in distress. She was wearing a magenta jacket-top with

CROW: Magenta?

black pants, a sort of uniform in the fleet she was in.         "The

TOM: Black pants?
CROW: Fleet?
TOM: Mike, *please* tell me Bouyer's changed the uniforms in BSS Orion...
MIKE: Do you *really* want an Orion cameo?

Princess. An honor to meet you, Your Highness. Soon you will cease," the
monster hissed.

TOM: Direct objects here, just grab them for free!

    "Yeah right. You just hurt one of my favorite power sources, bio. 

CROW: So Valerie's a youma?

													And for
that, you'll pay," she said Evil(tm)ly.

MIKE: Just $19.95, plus sales tax where applicable.

    "I doubt you will succeed. As you fleshes would say: Ooh, I'm shakin'."

TOM. Boo.

    "Where did you come from?"

CROW: Who sent you?  Why are you in my house?

    "The Almighty Droid created me. 

MIKE: Dear God, it's Bill Gates!

						And know this, Warrior Princess, not even

MIKE: Oh, it's a Xena crossover.  And here I thought she'd try to mix it up with Star Trek.
TOM: Forget Xena, we want Gabrielle!
<Crow and Tom begin to shout cheers and various odes to the beauty of Gabrielle>

you, nor your puny ancestors could defeat my master."
    "He's alive?" Valerie questioned.

CROW: Something escaped.
TOM: The Lost Kingdom.  The new sequel to the Sailor R Movie.
MIKE: That's not funny.

    "Ohhh yeah."
    "Damn. The guy won't give up! I'll kill him again later. But first, I'll

TOM: Make some snacks!  Do you like peanut butter and crackers?

take care of you." Valerie turned around to see that Raye was attentively

CROW: Asleep.

watching and completely detransformed. She turned back around and said
something a tad surprising. 

MIKE: NO SOUP FOR YOU!

				"Infinite. Mars. Star. Power!!" Raye looked on
shocked with the rest of the lot, except for the monster.

TOM: Who, as a Monster of the Day, was utterly bereft of any emotion.

    Valerie raised her hand in the air and caught a glowing red rod.

CROW: Um, lemme guess.  It has a pocket-clip and a symbol of Mars on the top?

												 She
brought her hand down in front of her and the rod turned into a fireball. 

MIKE: You may be right.

												It
started to grow quickly and eventually engulfed her completely in a sphere
of flaming red fire. 

TOM:  You know, for a new senshi, she has an extraordinarily short lifespan.  She doesn't even make it past the henshin sequence.

				Lightning struck. 

MIKE: A shot rang out.

							The sphere crackled with energy and
disappeared in a huge display of lights. The fire had revealed another
Sailor Mars, with beautiful flowers in her midst.

CROW: Mars?  Flowers?  You make the connection.
TOM: In *her* midst?
MIKE: If she's identical to Sailor Mars, does this include hair color, star earrings, hatred of Usagi, etc.?
TOM: Not if you're Chris Davies.

    "I am not impressed. Prepare to be eliminated!" He formed several small

CROW: Fansubbing franchises.

blue power spheres and each flew with lightning speed towards her.
    Valerie raised her hand up and shouted "Shield!" 

MIKE: Lacks the punch of a normal power phrase, yet lacks any novelty or goodness.

									and brought down a
translucent red shield in front of her. The spheres collided with it and
exploded on impact. "Hmm. I'm not impressed either. Take this! MARS STARFIRE
IGNITE!!!" 

TOM: Oh please.

		The flaming red fireball which she had created soared towards the

TOM: Soared?

creature. She whispered something, but no one could make it out. 

CROW: It was probably something like, "Oh no, not again."

											The monster
suddenly darted upwards. She missed! No, wait. 

MIKE: This is like bad play-by-play announcing.

								"Surround!!!" Six blazing red

TOM: Dolby speakers came out of nowhere and blasted the stereo hell out of the youma.

discs hit the thing dead on. "Hi-ya!" she yelled as she did a flying kick to
his head. This Sailor Mars landed ever so gracefully as the demon was killed
on the spot.

CROW: *That* Sailor Mars cried all the way home.

    "Hey, Raye, why couldn't you do that, hmm?" Serena asked mockingly.

MIKE: To Kill A Mockingrabbit.

    "Serena!" Mina scolded. 

TOM: I call no way.  When has Minako ever scolded anyone?
MIKE: Um, this is magical girl anime.  You waived your right to a 'no-way' a long time ago.

    "Well maybe I'm not her! Get a life!" Raye stuck her tongue out at Serena

CROW: Never seen *that* before.

and stalked over to Sailor Mars.
    "Waaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!" she wailed.

<Crow and Mike make wailing siren noises>
TOM: Warning!  We have an unclear pronoun reference!  Report to action stations!

						 Tuxedo Mask tried to plug his ears and
comfort her at the same time.

CROW: Serena?  Rei?  Sailor Mars?

    "WHO ARE YOU!?! HOW'D YOU USE THE POWER OF MARS!? WHERE THE FRICK 

MIKE: Ford?

												DID YOU

TOM: Get that stunning accessory set?

COME FROM!? WHAT DID HE MEAN PRINCESS!? WHO ARE YOU!?!" Raye fumed.

CROW: DO NOT WAIT FOR THE TRANSLATION!  ANSWER ME NOW!
MIKE: Okay, I call no Star Trek VI references for the rest of the post.

    "Calm down! Calm down! I'll explain everything as soon as we're in
private!" 

MIKE: Bwomp-chicka-bwomp-bwomp-chicka-bwomp...

		Mina walked over to Raye, and tried to get her to calm down as
requested. It kinda worked and she motioned everyone to her room. Sailor

TOM: You mean she kinda motioned them.  Didn't want to be too assertive.

Moon and Cape Boy 

<Crow sweatdrops>
MIKE: Neat! How'd you do that?
CROW: Practice, my friend.

			changed back to normal as everyone settled down. "My name
is Nina Crusherly," 

TOM: No.
CROW: No.
MIKE: No.

				she started, "but I'm really the reincarnate of Princess
Valerie of the planet Leodon. I'm here to help."

MIKE: Nothing strikes fear into the hearts of men quite like those four words.

    Lita inquired, "How did you use Ra... Mars' power?"

TOM: Roget better get a lot of money for this fanfic.

    "It's okay, Lita. I know all your identities already." There were a few

CROW: Sighs of outright disgust at the utter stupidity exhibited thus far.

little gasps. "As for the power, the God of Mars let me borrow it."

TOM: You mean the guy Mars worships?
MIKE: Yeah.  His name's Ted.

    "He what?!" Raye cried.

MIKE: Is named Ted.  Do you need it spelled?

    "Let me borrow it. That was because there's an Evil(tm) force out there. 

CROW: The Christian Coalition?

													Much,
much stronger than the Nega-idiots you are currently fighting."

TOM: Well, they're currently just sitting around and talking, so I suppose that's possible.

    "Stronger?" Serena was getting frightened at the thought.

TOM:  Imagine our delight.

    "Yes. It seems they've found where my new home is; here on Earth in this

MIKE: ENGLAND!

century. They obviously found out that you were a strong source of 

CROW: Heroin.

											fighting
power for me. 

TOM: Guys, this is worse than a Star Trek crossover.  It's a Marissa Stories crossover.
<unimaginable screams of torment and despair fill the theater>

			If they cut you off, which I'm sure they'll be able to do, the
world would lose some powerful warriors. Even if we'd be able to use full

<unimaginable screams of torment and despair cease to fill the theater>

Sailor power and defeat the enemy, my friends and I could never replace you.
You're too important; especially you Princess Serena."

MIKE: Um, so when do you tell us something we didn't know?

    "You mentioned friends. There are others?" inquired Mina.

CROW: <falsetto> Yeah.  Carol and Alice.  They're my roommates.

    "Mmm hmm. Mars, Jupiter, and Venus power are all in use constantly. 

TOM: Remember, depend on genuine Mars, Jupiter, and Venus parts for all your power needs.

												As for
Mercury, her avatar was killed."

CROW: By some guy named Urawa.  Ironic, actually.

    "Wait a minute," Darien said, "I'm still confused. Where do you come from?

TOM: Our nightmares.

What happened?"

MIKE: Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much...

    "Well, let's just say..." She paused in thought. "Oh, the hell with it,

CROW: Yes!  It's whup-ass time!

I'll tell you." Valerie straightened up and cleared her throat. 

TOM: Stand up straight, back erect, knees...

											"It all
started about five billion years ago. 

MIKE: We just wanted to know where you're from, not the complete history of the Sol system!

							Just in the next solar system from
here 

CROW: Surrounding a star that I won't tell you about.

	was my home, Leodon. An Evil(tm) man, or more appropriately murderous
slime, was raiding my planet again.

TOM: More power to him.

                                                 "We had all thought my
ancestors killed him, but they knew
they couldn't slay him, so my ancestors just sealed him away. 

MIKE: Which doesn't explain a lot about why you thought he was dead, but moving along...

											When he broke

CROW: Wind.

free, he wanted revenge on my people and attacked when my grandfather was

CROW: On the can.
MIKE: That's two potty jokes in a row.  You know what that means.
CROW: Oh man...

still in control. That king and my father the prince together sealed Droid

TOM: Avoid the Noid.

away again. But when I turned three, he got out AGAIN, and started
slaughtering us.

MIKE: Apparently, he didn't do a good enough job.

    "These damned raids continued for two more years. And all of a sudden, the

CROW: Stars fell into the sea, and the moon turned black as blood, and the seas boiled...

creep decided to attack the capital city of Eos, where I lived. My big
brother Wesley,

TOM: That tears it.  Wesley Crusherly?  Kill me now, Mike, or else I'll do it myself!

			 my father, and I were lucky to have lived. But..."

MIKE: That's subjective.

											 Valerie
looked away. "My mother wasn't so lucky. She was assassinated while saving a
little boy's life. Ooh, did I get him bad for that.

CROW: Did you deliver the dreaded Real Admiral?

    "Anyways, my dad got scared for us. He ordered my brother and me to get
our
powers uncovered and to be trained as warriors like him. 

TOM: Remember: the family that wages vendettas together stays together!

									We got by pretty
well. Training finished when I was ten and Wesley and I assumed our duties.

CROW: As gas-station attendants.

He went to protect his betroved, Princess Vanessa of Dome, 

MIKE: Okay, nine out of ten she's related to thunder somehow.
CROW: <falsetto> I'm thinking of you, Thunderheart.
MIKE: Crow, do you realize just how many people will get that?
CROW: Yes.

										from Droid's
raids in her home. Me, I defended my whole damn planet! I was gonna be
queen, so I had to if I wanted to rule.

TOM: Delegating authority?  Ha, that's for the little people!

    "I lost that chance anyway. You could say Droid really massacred Leodon

CROW: Or Londinium.

that time. He blew it up. 

MIKE: I guess he took that 'Are you the bomb' song a bit too seriously.

				Everyone on the planet perished, except for me.

TOM: Shame, really.

												 I
got the chance to open a portal after some major butt-kickin' and escaped. I

MIKE: Eloquent, isn't she?

went to the planet Dome, and found that it was destroyed as well.

MIKE: Which would imply that it wasn't there, and therefore that you never went there.

    "Luckily, some wonderful scientists, thank God they were born, 

TOM: Thank Satan they died.

												had already
thought up a theory to put an artificial atmosphere over a city, so it

CROW: Could contravene the laws of physics in a particularly stupid manner.

wouldn't need the natural kind. 

MIKE: I bet it has Astroturf and skyboxes too.  Bastards.

					The three main cities were set up and ready
to test the stuff. The thing is, they never got to test it. 

TOM: Robotech syndrome, there.

										The planet
exploded before testing, and they just had to pray the equipment would work.

CROW: There being no planet for the cities to rest on, these prayers went unanswered.

It did for two of the cities, but the third one's failed and it detonated
like the rest of Dome. That's why your avatar is gone, Amy, she was the
princess of the 3rd kingdom.

TOM: So the solution of the decay of cities due to warfare, meteors, aliens, etc., is to build really big domes?
MIKE: Of course.  Any 12-year-old could tell you that.

    "Thankfully, Wesley was on the 2nd city with his princess. 

CROW: Oh Bob, I'm going to be ill...
MIKE: Where there's Bobs, there's going to be some Zoes.

											Those cities
became part of a new asteroid belt. 

TOM: One that orbited exactly once before plunging into the depths of the star.

						They were renamed Dome City I and Dome
City II. 

CROW: How quaint.
MIKE: Lava dome?

		There were a lot of attempts on my life and on others, along with
about a million of those strikes. We stayed strong with awesome power and
high-tech computers.

MIKE: Ah, the Star Trek formula at work.
TOM: Minus the awesome power.
CROW: And high-tech computers.
TOM: And plus old guys moralizing.
CROW: And women with no power whatsoever.

    "Princess Vanessa got captured one battle and was taken to Droid's lair. I

MIKE: Please don't let this be an Urotsukidoji crossover too...
TOM: It'd just be our luck.

guess he wanted her power in every aspect of the word; her kingdom, her
position, her natural powers. 

CROW: Her moment...

						She refused, he got pissed, Vanessa was sent

MIKE: To bed, without supper.

to the future Earth. 

TOM <droid>: Um, let's see.  I can torture her, kill her, do millions of things to her...oh, I'll send her to the future!

				He screwed up though, instead of sending her to a
barren Earth, she was shipped to the 24th century of this one. 

CROW: This is where I lose all hope in humanity, right?
TOM: Yes.

											My aaaairhead
of a brother, was so in love with her that he just HAD to follow her, even
if their reincarnations would never ever meet again. 

MIKE: I don't know about you, but I'm hoping they meet the Grim Reaper.

    "When the time portals created by Droid and us began to close, something
happened.

CROW: A virtual particle-antiparticle pair was created and annihilated in 10^-34 seconds?

		 I don't know what, or why, but those things just all of a sudden
exploded into something, and engulfed the Doman solar system and Droid's
lair. I have no idea why, but everybody fell into deep stasis sleep but me.

TOM: The author fell asleep too.
CROW: Yeah, from the strain of coming up with all the details.

I guess fate wanted me to have a hard time or something. So I was mailed to

TOM: And then got bounced back.  Insufficient postage.
CROW: Or a really efficient procmail.

20th century Earth, here, but in the U.S.A.

MIKE: Which fails to explain what she's doing in Tokyo.
TOM: <whisper> Dub timeline.

    "Wesley is now, or will be, Wesley Crusher, 

ALL: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
TOM: Was that excessive?
CROW: No.

								rival and true love of Vanessa
Kamen. Living on the starship Enterprise, used to hate each other's sludgy

CROW: Hell, everyone else does.

guts, but no longer, are the two teen-age lovebirds. With a living
lie-detector named Deanna Troi

MIKE: You know, I don't think I'll ever like Sailor Mooon again.

						 on board, they're having trouble keeping
secrets. As for me, all I've got to do is open up a time portal and I'm
there in Dome City II.       

TOM: Oh yeah?  Well why don't you do it, Ms. Big Britches!?

    "I THOUGHT I killed Droid once and for all, but I guess he really is
immortal.

CROW: I would call coming back from the dead fairly good evidence of that.

		 So I'm fighting again and I don't want to. So, got the picture?"

MIKE: No.

    Everyone nodded. Raye spoke up, "So you're fighting an Evil(tm) creature who
destroyed your life?"

TOM: Conan O'Brian?

    "Correction. WE are fighting an Evil(tm) creature who destroyed my life," the
lost princess stated.
    "WE??" Everyone asked.
    "Yup. He attacks you, war is declared. It's all in the rulebook." she

MIKE: Section 2, paragraph 4, 7th clause.

reported. "So you had better start makin' something of yourselves if you
wanna live." Valerie declared.

CROW: And if we don't?

    Luna chimed in, "I believe her."
    "Why Luna?" Mina implored.

<all just laugh>
MIKE: You know, I liked it better when Mina didn't have any character than when she had a totally screwed-up character.

    "There's an old Moon Kingdom legend that tells the exact same story. She
also fits the description of the girl telling it," Luna replied.

TOM: Sure you don't want to see the mug shots?

    "Then you do..." Val was cut off by a beeping sound. She did the normal
procedure with her wrist-com 

MIKE: A sacrifice to Baal?

					and Eddie appeared. "Yes?"
    "Girl, 

TOM: <singing> You'll be a woman soon...

		we're under attack and we need you! Pronto! These power levels are
phenomenal! Seventy-two percent!!" he paused.

CROW: Oh.

    In the back round, there was a lot of commotion heard. Another kind of
beeping went off, an alert to be exact, 

MIKE: Um, thanks for clarifying and all, but you didn't.

							and a woman's voice talking like any
computer was heard. 

TOM: I am Aptiva.

			"Attention: Intruder Alert. Bio-Mechanicals and

CROW: It's the Borg!

Bio-Demons at seventy-two percent on maximum three. Eight Bios and numerous
unknown fixture troops. Repeat..."

ALL: "Attention: Intruder Alert.  Bio-Mechanicals and Bio-Demons at seventy-two percent on 	maximum three. Eight Bios and numerous unknown fixture troops.

    "Hear that!?"
    "Yeah!"
    "Get over here!" Valerie tapped on the com-link and it dematerialized.

TOM: Taking Valerie with it.

"You
know, I could really use your help. Your powers would increase in another
dimension."

CROW: Due to the 4th Law of Fanfic Writing.

    "You mean go to that Dome City II place?" Darien asked.

MIKE: No, the Casbaa.  Of course the Dome City II place!

    "Yup."
        "Some of us have families ya know.

CROW: Actually, we only see Usagi's family.  We only see Rei's grandfather, Makoto's parents are 	dead, we only hear about Ami's mom, and Minako's family is never seen at all.
TOM: Thank you, Mr. Arromdee.
CROW: Bite me.

							 What would they think if we just
vanished like that?" Raye countered.

MIKE: That it was just like all the other times you've just vanished without notification?

    "No problem. They're in another time, and another dimension. 

CROW: <Valerie> And will stay their until the...retrieval...fee is paid.

											I have a
special crystal that will take care of the time travel while I take care of
the dimensional portal. When we finish we'll just end up back here the
minute after we leave. See?" she explained.

MIKE: What?  Someone who actually has a practical use for time travel?
TOM: You know, they could just hang around there and party for awhile, and then go to the future, and no-one would know the difference.

    "Are you sure it's safe? We wouldn't want anything to happen to them,"

MIKE: Oh, they're already dead.  Didn't she tell you?

Artemis asked.
    "Nothing will happen, this is perfectly safe. 

TOM: Really?  I'd feel safer if Slartibartfast said that to me.

								I've done it... well...
let's
just say a lot," Val said.

ALL: Saaaaayy!

    "Hmm..."
    "Uhhh..."
    "Well..."
    "Ummm..."
    "Okay!" they said in unision.

CROW: The dialogue makes this fanfic for me.

    "Great! Come on!" She ran outside. Valerie created a portal and examined

TOM: It for errors.  It was a rush job, after all.

everybody else. They looked nervous. "Oh come on. It's alright. It isn't
like your enemy's gonna intercept our portal and bring us to his lair, and
prepare us for hundreds of years of torture. 

MIKE: <Valerie> It's more like thousands.

							If he did I'd just kick his butt."
    "Oh that's reassuring," someone muttered.

TOM: That was me.

    "It's not that bad. Just don't transform and nothing will happen. 

CROW: Which kind of sums up the entire series.

												Which
reminds me." She tapped a little, yellow triangle on her chest and suddenly
detransformed. She was now in her magenta uniform. She glanced at the others
and then Valerie walked casually through the portal. No one said a thing and
reluctantly followed suit. It slowly began to collapse.

MIKE: Sucking them all to a dark painful death.  The end.

(continued)
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