Ok, here is parts 1-3 plus the intro to the P-zilla files.. I have it
written through 9 but as I hate my writing I'm not satisfied enough to post
those yet... But here's what I have! ^_^
P.s... Forgive the MESSED UP word wrap.. I can't figure out how the heck it
got that way *boggle*
Prologue: "The Evil Awakens"
(No need for P-Chan)
Excerpts from the diary of Ryouga Hibiki, Age 16, follow.
***
Tuesday (Not sure of the date)
Well, I found my way home again. It's been, oh, eight months or so
since I've seen this place. Hasn't changed much! Well, a bit dusty maybe.
I'm really glad Shiro-kuro (Hibiki family dog) found me in ...umm... Canada?
It was awful hot there. I came back, hoping to find someone
in my family. Not a soul is here, but I did find this diary. I'll be sure
to take it with me, that way I can keep a travel log, and sketch a few
pictures of Akane even. Maps too, I'll draw maps so I
don't get lost! Oh, since I haven't written in this in about four years, I
suppose Akane is a good
place to start. Akane is my one true love, beautiful as you could imagine.
The way she takes me
to her bosom, holding me in her arms all night.. Ah, Akane.. I will save you
from him yet.
This brings me to Ranma Saotome, my sworn enemy. The last entry in
this diary was the
day when I first fought with him, back in Junior High. Reading my previous
entry, the fierceness
in my words brings waves of anger back. Now the fool has cursed me to be a
pig forever, and
stolen the love of my life. What disgusts me most, he mistreats Akane and
insults her. Someday,
diary, he will pay. I do, however have some doubts as to if the cur
actually *does* have feelings
at all for her. He sure seemed to, at Ryugenzawa... Interesting place,
that was.
Ryouga Hibiki
*** Begin gratuitous flashback!***
The sun filtered through the green and prosperous canopy of the magical
forest, hitting the
ground like a kaleidoscope that I watched from my hiding place. A young
girl, Akane Tendo,
started the long journey home at the side of one Ranma Saotome.
It was the end of one of my most perilous misadventures, Akane having
almost been
devoured by a perverted dragon called the Orochi. She was fine now,
however, and fighting with
Ranma again. I took this as a sign of normalcy (or what passes as such
around here.)
The cold water nearby where I stood glittered at me, offering
temptation to forgo the long
journey ahead and ride in her arms as a small black piglet by the name of
P-Chan.
While the water looked like a good idea, I knew that even Akane would
find it odd that
her pet pig chose to show up here. Still, that could be explained away. I
filled my canteen with
the water and doused myself in clear liquid from the very spring where we
had fought a huge
battle only a few hours ago.
The feeling of the change has always disoriented me, especially the
change in size. I felt
the full effect of this now, as the world spun around me and grew much, much
larger. P-chan, I
now was. P-Chan Tendo.
"Hey P-Chan, was wonderin' when you would show up!" Ranma exclaimed as
I leapt into
Akane's arms like a moth to flame. She was overjoyed to see me again, safe
and with her. I left
Ranma to pick up my clothes, backpack, and canteen. Ah, the feel of her
warm arms caressing
me, I had feared that I wouldn't ever feel them again. We all began our
journey home.
Exhausted, I slept the whole way.
When we returned to the dojo, everyone was so exited to see those two
back that I slunk
away, depressed. Time for a journey, of training. I must be able to not
only beat the foul Ranma,
I must also be able to protect Akane in the future! He can let her run off
with other guys if he
likes, but I will protect her innocence and virtue.
Yes, a good walk will do the trick. I leapt into the bath (Father,
err, Mr. Tendo was there
at the time) and left with my possessions, heading for the wooded regions of
a mountain training
area.
*End Flashback*
-----Present----
Ryouga closes his diary, and puts it in his backpack next to his
canteen. He checks his
water bottle, and notes to himself; <The water from that place tastes great,
it hasn't even run out
yet. I'll have to pick up more if I ever get the chance. Perhaps my
travels will take me there, once
again.> He pats his expectant dog gently, and whispers to her, "If I don't
come back after four
months, come find me. " Ryouga leaves yet again, getting lost before he
even makes it outside.
"Damn it all! This isn't a forest!" He growls, looking at the surfers
around him...
Surfer Dude: "Hey man, where are yer swimming duds? C'mon n join us!"
(The surfer drags Ryouga into the water, and suddenly all we can see is a
small black pig, sitting
bug-eyed on a surfboard, watching a HUGE wave approaching.)
**Four days later**
"Damn it all AGAIN! This isn't a FOREST!!" He yells, looking at the
endless field of ice
and snow sprawling in every direction as far as the eye can see. Suddenly,
the ice beneath him
gives way and Ryouga falls in the frigid water.
P-chan awakes and as his vision clears, he can make out a round black
opening below
him.. Hmm, it seems to be filled with some viscous substance.. Water,
boiling water.. And the
black thing seems to be a pot....
(Pan to outside; and igloo. Loud screams are heard.)
Ryouga: BWEE! BWEEAAAHHH!!!! AHHH!!! HOT HOT HOT HOTHOTHOT!!! GET
AWAY FROM ME!!
(The igloo explodes and a naked man runs out, getting all of two feet before
the water on him
freezes and makes for a lovely lawn decoration.)
**Eight days later**
"AAUUUGGHHHHH!!!! FOREST MY GRANDMOTHER!" (Guess what? It's the
Genom Building!)
"Excuse me?" Ryouga asks a lady with long brown hair, a very bad
attitude, and a
hardsuit. "Where is the Tendo Dojo?"
Priss glares at Ryouga, whom it seems has inadvertently waltzed into he
middle of a fight.
<What an idiot! He walks in here, all dirty and smelly, asks me where a
dojo is while he drinks
from his canteen like some damn boyscout.> "OUT OF MY WAY, ASSHOLE!" She
hollers,
shoving him aside and heading for the next boomer, which probably at this
point smells a helluva
lot better then Ryouga..
***Cut to outside of Genom Tower***
A fair sized chunk of the genom tower suddenly just falls off, as a
large black object a few
hundred feet tall fills the space where it used to be. The air is filled
with an earthshaking,
"BWEEEE?"
****
The feeling he normally got when he changed of the world becoming much
bigger was
different, Ryouga noted. It was almost as if it was becoming much smaller,
How odd.
Nene looked at the LARGE but kawaii lil piggie that looked to have
materialized out of
nowhere-space (TM) and smushied a large army of boomers to a pulp. Her
glorious retort
consisted of a simple ".....?" The three remaining Knight Sabres stared at
the giant P-Chan
wordlessly.
<Hmm, now this is strange... Who left all these toys around? Where on
earth am I now?>
P-Chan made a survey the devastation before him stupidly. <Wonder what
happened here? Better
find some hot water, something doesn't feel right. Man, I spilled that neat
Ryugenzawa spring
water all over myself, there can't possibly be any left now...>
Priss struggled, trapped under a very large black rump. "GET OFF OF ME!
NOW!!" Too
bad the human voice doesn't carry that far up. Then, in a semi-pleading
voice, "I PROMISE I
WON'T EVER EAT BACON AGAIN! I'M SORRY FOR THOSE PORK-CHOPS I HAD LAST
WEEK! HEY! HELP!"
"My God, it's a giant bat!"
"Looks more like a pig to me.."
"You think so?"
"THIS ELF SUIT ITCHES!!"
"I still think it looks like a bat.."
"It's kind of cute, really. *giggle*"
"It's a new boomer!"
"Boomers are uglier then that..."
"It's a new super-cute boomer?"
****Begin Narration****
This is where my tragic tale begins. I, Ryouga Hibiki, grew to
horrendous proportions in
my cursed form. How on earth is Akane going to cuddle me now?????!!!?!?!?!
**Fin, Introduction**
In a lab buried in the dank depths of some government installation
where no soldier ever
dares venture, A pair of beady red eyes examined a file. With a cunning eye
for detail and a keen
mind, it's withered, gnarled hand turns pages with great effort. A dark and
ugly smile lit up on the
face of the figure as a foolproof and ingeniously evil idea came into it's
head. A cold and
monotone laugh echoes through the dimly lit room as it utters a single word-
"YES!"
-----
The P-Zilla File
-----
M. Miner
<blah>
All right belong to, umm, well, it isn't me, Okay?
Takahashi/Shogukan/Kitty/Fuji/Viz. I have no
money to be sued out of, so don't waste your time. In fact, if you need to
protect your copyright,
remember, this doesn't exist. So it can't be used against you- it's all
imaginary! Really!
</blah>
____________________________
\PART 1 --------------------\
\Enter P-Zilla, the BIG pig!\
----------------------------
=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=
*Part 1, Chapter 1*
P-Chan, Super Star!
=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=
On the set of a cheap movie, the director screamed at her lackeys.
This in itself was nothing out of the ordinary, the mecca was broken again.
A horror movie about
a large monster terrorizing the general populace, in color, with a cheap
plot rehash. Yadda yadda
yadda. <How did I get in this job?> Director Unryuu mused to herself.
At the interview for the position, they saw Katsunishinski (sp? Akari's
pet pig) and gave
Akari the job on the spot. She pondered, <I'm beginning to think that they
assumed he was a
creation of my greatness and so they asked me to do him in a bigger scale?
Hah! It's because the
world has yet to see the greatness that comes from my family's sumo pig
farm! Why, within
years, we'll take over the industry! Unryuu Sumo Pigs will be the most
demanded! Sumo Pig
wrestling will be a sport! ...That's why I'm in this job, really,> she
assured herself, <for the glory
of Unryuu Pig Farms! That mecca pig over there will be our corporate logo.
Once he gets
working, anyhow..>
"Psst! Look over there!" One of the lackeys whispered to another.
"That's teh' director,
what's she doing?" "Observe my friend, that is a maniacal laugh (TM). It
means she's up to
something. What a crackpot, I wonder who hired her?" "Yeah, but she sure is
cute, laughing like
that." Lackey1 glowered at Lackey2, who exhibited a blank and dreamy
expression on his face.
"Just get this damn hunk of bolts workin, and I let you live, traitor."
'This hunk of bolts' was literally such, and was currently inoperative.
It had worked for a
grand total of five minutes. The town that stretched in front of it was
cheap cardboard, but very
tall. Akari had insisted on everything in scale. "Hey!" A shout made it's
way to her ears. "The
bolts, err, meccha-thingy is working!" Akari stood up, <Now time to make an
over-glorified
movie. What was I thinking?> "Okay! Quiet on the set!" She shouted.
(The lights dim, and a scene appears of a city at night. little lights
(oo! Christmas lights!)
are in the windows. suddenly one of the buildings falls over. Mecca-Zilla
appears, about half the
height of the buildings. It roars halfheartedly and stumbles over to the
next prop and topples it as
well.)
Male Actor: "Oh my god..what... is this??? It is...Knocking
over...buildings!!!
Oh..The..Humanity!! I learned to act....from old...Star Trek reruns!"
Female Actor: "Gasp! Oh! Save me!! It's going to knock down that building on
top of me and
I'm underpaid!! Stunt double!"
<God, this sucks.. What was I thi-...EHH?????> Akari was interrupted
from her line of
thought as a large, black object trotted on in, smushing Mecca-Zilla to a
Pulp-Zilla. An earth
shaking, "BWEEEE!!!" resounded across the filming lot.
Male Actor: "What the hell..is..that???"
Lackey: "The competition?"
Token crossover character D: "It's destroying the city!"
Akari: "FILM!!! FILM IT!!!!"
<Hmm...> Wondered Ryouga. <Where am I now?>
P-chan looks at a ridiculously small map of Hoboken between his huge
kawaii-lil-paws
(TM)
<This doesn't look like Ryugenzawa. I must get cured! And then I'll save
dear Akane from the
lecherous Ranma!>
Director Akari stood in shock (as the film crew filmed P-chan wandering
through the
make-shift town)
After a few quiet moments, Akari narrowed her eyes, slowly closing them,
deep in thought.
Her eyes opened again, this time as... Little pink hearts! <What a
PIG!> Director Unryuu
wandered off after it, In a daze.
"Hey, do we have enough footage? were almost out of scenery!"
"Not really.."
(One of the lackeys points the seemingly lost P-chan towards the
desert, so it heads for the
city.)
"It's gonna destroy the city!!!! FOR THE MERCY OF IT ALL!!"
"KEEP FILMING!!!"
----
Part 2- P-chan and the Brain
----
"Fools!" Cried Brain as he read over his cameo. "Gnarled? Old? UGLY??"
Pinky stumbled through the text, "Gee Brain, I think the writer doesn't like
you very much..
*Narf*"
The Brain narrowed his foul eyes and mumbled under fetid breath reeking of
rotted cheese,
"HEY! Don't describe me like that, my breath is not *fetid*!" He gnashed his
yellow and crooked
old teeth at this poor and innocent auth-*WHAP* Ow! Gomen!
*AHEM!*
"Anyhow," The vastly superior and intelligent mouse continued, "The
government has been
collecting this information on a potentially dangerous weapon, a large black
monster identified to
belong to the hog family. Possibly a genetic accident from a place in
Hokkaido, notes this report.
No one is positively sure, it has seemingly appeared out of nowhere. Do you
understand, Pinky?"
"Not a bit, Brain."
*Sigh* "Anyhow, I if we could commandeer this weapon, any city in the world
would be at our
mercy. Do you know what that means?" Brain queried.
"No, not really.."
"It means.. We can get free rubber pants!"
Pinky looked confused, blinking a few times.. "Eh?"
Brain smiled at pinky. "I am not devoid of humor. What it really means
is we can take
over the world!"
Pinky grinned. "NARF! More like you Brain! ...But I really liked the
first idea better.."
Brain scowled at Pinky, annoyed at the poor reception of his attempt at
humor. "Anyhow.
These plans I'm making will allow us to track down and study this organism,
I suspect it's no
machine. Then we will find a way to control the object the press hails as
Pig-Zilla. AND TAKE
OVER THE WORLD!"
***
<Oh Akane... How I lo- Why are all these stupid helicopters flying around
me?> thought Ryouga
sleepily. <And now, Oh-diary-that-I-lost, what is to become of me now?
With the way things
stand now, I'm too big to fit on Akane's bed..>
"My God, it's crying..."
"Should I call out the flood patrols?"
"No, just open fire."
<ACK! I'm being shot at! ..That tickles! Stopthat! Haha! Hot water, I
can explain in my human
*HAHAHA!!* form even if I am *ahahahaha!* oversized.>
P-Zilla charged for the hot springs in the nearby town, pigdozing over a few
jeeps, tanks, and a
private army or two. Nothing seemed to be able to stop or slow him down, as
a nervous system
that big isn't all too fast. He plowed into the hot springs, and the famous
monster that had been
plaguing all of Japan/Canada/France (Circle one) that week disappeared.
A tingling feeling, none to unpleasant, overtook Hibiki Ryouga. The world
spun, jumped, and
skipped rope, and everything scaled up and he scaled down, leaving nothing
but a filthy teenager
caught skinny dipping in hot-springs without paying.<*whew..*>
***
As he sits in the police station, Ryouga watches with boredom the events
around him. Shortly
after his arrival, an almost normal (albeit furry) looking fellow with a
camouflage bandanna is
dragged in by three officers, thrown in a cell and locked up with Ryouga.
Bored and with nothing else to do, Ryouga tries out conversation. "So...
Whatcha in for, Mister,
umm.." "Ah, Abercrumpie, Please call me Wombat. Everyone else does." The
furry thing smiles
widely at Ryouga. "So, what are you in this generic anime prison (TM) for?"
"Well, I destroyed a
large city, so I'm being charged with indecent exposure because I was caught
in a hot spring. I
don't think they know about the city yet. You?" Wombat smiles knowingly,
"Ahhh, a much more
criminal offense. I am charged with being a Hentai Space Wombat, you see."
<What a weirdo,>
thinks Ryouga, <I always end up with the strange ones. Oh! I'll bet it's
one of those fan-fiction
people, they're all so bizarre... Anyhow! Akane may be in danger, with my
absence. This is my
time to leave.> "Ne..?" "Hmm?" "Wombat-s..san, if I promise to get us out of
here can you show
me the way to a place called the Tendo-dojo?" The furry creature simply grinned.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Part III
"This Little Piggy Went to the Dojo"
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Dear Diary,
Me Again! Well, it took me over a week to learn to write- These hooves
are slightly
clumsy with this little pen and book. As an update, I'm smaller then I was.
I seem to have shrunk
to a mere fifty feet or so, every time my curse has been activated (I must
make a note to throw a
brick through the window of that old lady) I've gotten smaller by a small
amount. I feel a bit more
manageable, however I can not say that the police have been pleased with the
damage I cause to
the roads, smaller buildings, and parks. Using the restroom is an
especially *large* problem now,
literally. Thank goodness I'm staying near the hot-springs here (Alaska, I
think) and it's very nice
and sunny here so things are pleasant. One of the nice fellows who lives
around here has taken to
keeping clothes and food handy for me, he prefers me in my human form as I
eat less and don't
damage as much. Oh, and since I'm taking the time to recuperate from the
shots and such that
were thrown at me, (They appear as scratches and bruises on my real form) I
have one of those
cool electric collar under my bandanna that
shocks me if I go too far out the wrong way. Neat, huh? Once I'm all fixed
up, I can go find
Akane. While Alaska is nice, I must not forget my mission and duty to my
beloved. Saotome, I
will get you yet.
Signed,
Ryouga Hibiki
Looking up wistfully from the tiny book clasped betwixt his hooves almost
comically, P-Zilla
stares into the sunset along the beach, eyes sparkling. Obviously he's
thinking of Akane, for he
doesn't notice the bedraggled but extremely kawaii young girl opening the
gate to the cheap motel
in Miami (Hey, they got a hot tub, don't knock it!) staring at the largish
black pig with eyes
shaped like Valentines day candy.
The motel manager looked out of the window idly, noting the usual tourists
snapping pictures of
themselves and P-Zilla for a small fee. Business was good, with a few more
months of this and he
would be able to retire. And he only had to feed, clothe, and board the
fellow who turned into
this monstrosity of a moneymaker. Smiling to himself, he spat some of his
chewing pocky to the
side, barley missing an adorable lady in a plaid skirt. "Oh! Heh, sorry
miss. I should look before I
spit. Looking for a room or just some fun?" The girl more or less ignored
him, he watched her
stare at P-Zilla with awe and...something else. <Eww, not another zoophile,
damn. All the cute
ones are weird.> he mused to himself. She wandered up to P-Zilla looked at
him, a smile forming
on her face.
---Anyhow, diary, I now have a plan for attacking Ranma. Yes, the reason I
always lost before is
I didn't have a plan. Well, diary, I do now. I thought about it for a day
or two, and figured out
one! Yeah, I'll rush at him and hit him repeatedly. Sound good? It took m--
<Eh? What's this?> P-Zilla looked down at below him, where Akari was
snuggling against him.
The Motel-Keeper looked on with wide eyes, pondering to himself, <Hmmm... I
never knew pigs
could nosebleed like that. Holy shit..> Motel-keeper Hill yawned to himself
as one of the lackeys
at the front desk called to him, "Todd! Does that thing need some kleenex?"
Dear diary,
The kind fellow removed my collar after I asked him if I could be on my
way and how to
get to the Tendo Dojo. Replete with a map and some money (Oo, American
currency.) This girl
who I met, her name is Akari, is going to come with me and guide me. She's
really adorable, but
this does mean I must travel in pig form as she has not seen me as a human
yet. Seņor Hill kindly
talked her into it, as he knew she was from around the same parts. She
wasn't too pleased at the
loss of her former traveling companion, Katsunishinski, whom made an
excellent bacon side to the
free continental breakfast two days ago I hear. She's very smitten with me,
err.. P-Zilla. This is
looking to be a very interesting trip...
-Hibiki Ryouga
Brain grinned as he finished a complicated schematic to perfection, the
beauty of the mathematical
equations being of such beauty that Skuld and Washuu would have been
drooling at them. A
sparkle gleamed in his eyes as he turned to his associate and said, "Pinky,
here's our plan. With
this plan we can take over the world!" Pinky blinked, and questioned,
"Okay, but what's the
plan?"
With a sigh, the Brain explained, "We find out what is dear to this
creature, and exploit and
threaten him with it. According to the government file kept conveniently in
the lab here, a smaller
replica of the pig in question has been sighted in the Nerima ward of Tokyo,
Japan. Here Pinky, I
wish to show you the files that the Japanese government has on the residents
there and frequent
guests. I obtained these through..." Brain looked at Pinky, who was sound
asleep by this point.
He bapped him until he woke, and continued.
"Soun Tendo. Middle aged. Very unstable personality, cries easily.
Supposedly a martial artist,
rarely seen practicing. Frequently playing Go and Shogi with a panda and
the senior Saotome.
Frequent aliases are Daddy, Mr. Tendo, and 'My Dear Uncle Tendo'."
"Kasumi Tendo. Eldest Tendo sister. Kind, understanding, good cook, and
housekeeper. Rarely
sad, upset, depressed. Sunny disposition, government suspects drugs.
Possibly the mastermind
behind all the heinous activities that occur inside the house."
"Nabiki Tendo. Middle sister of the Tendo family. Mercenary, money and
power hungry. Oh..
wait.. That bit is scratched out. it says in it's place, 'Kind, innocent, no
suspicion of any
wrongdoing. Recommend tax break and bonus money. Physical description:
Beautiful with sexy
short brown hair and snappy fashion taste.." Brain looked at the picture and
scowled, "She's got
connections. I can tell."
"Akane Tendo. Violent, brutish. Has caused more damage to the male
residents of Nerima over
time than lemons Kun-chan has written." Brain looked up, "Who's that I
wonder? Anyhow, her
distinguishing physical characteristic is short cropped black hair.
Frequent clothing is school
uniform or a gi. Frequent aliases are Tomboy, Uncute, Violent Pervert Girl,
and My Darling
Akane."
"Genma Saotome, alias Octopus Face. Heavy drinker, also rumored to be a
martial artist. Middle
aged and balding, wears martial-arts gi. Soft spots include but are not
limited to food, drink, go,
Shogi, master Happosai, shiny objects, pretty colors, fun, water, spare
tires, balls of yarn, pretty
girls, his wife, sharp objects, and Panda Treats."
Pinky blinked a few times.. "Woah..."
Brain continued, raising an eyebrow. "Ranma Saotome. Son of Genma Saotome.
Extremely
powerful fighter. Wishy washy with women, the government suspects
homosexuality or at the
least very confused gender ideas. Fears cats, his mother, and women.
Aliases: Baka, Pervert, and
Oh Cursed Saotome."
Brain smirked, "Sounds like a pushover... Oh, heres another resident, Ranko
Tendo, supposedly.
Doesn't appear in family records. Acts like a man for most of the time,
calls self Ranma Saotome
frequently."
"Then the pets, a panda which isn't worth delving into, and our center of
interest, P-chan Tendo.
A small black piglet, exact replica of our larger counterpart. Affectionate
towards Akane Tendo,
carries a hatred to Ranma Saotome and 'Ranko Tendo'."
With a wicked smile, Brain chuckled. "There's what we need."
----
Akane picked up her bag and slipped on her shoes, calling, "I'm going out
for the soy sauce
Kasumi, be back in a bit!" She went out the door, sliding it shut behind
her as she left. About the
time where she turned the corner, from the other direction trotted in a
rather large black pig and
girl decked out like a Scottish terrier at a wedding.
"Here we go, P-sama! Here's the place I was supposed to take you to." She
smiled charmingly
up at P-Zilla, who tried his hardest not to nosebleed and pass out. The pig
smiled (well, sorta) at
her and stepped through the dojo gate, snapping the top of it clean off as
he continued up the
walk and delicately tapped at the door.
Kasumi heard the knock in the kitchen, and she put down the knife she was
using to dice the pork
she was cooking. Washing her hands quickly, she went down the hall and
opened the door. "Oh
my, hello P-chan! I always thought you looked so runt-like, it seems that
you've grown a little bit.
Come on in, Akane went to the store for me." She smiled vacuously and
innocently up at him.
P-Zilla blinked in awe, and thought to himself, <Boy.. Is she really that
dense?>
It was a slightly comical situation, a fifty foot pig trying to sip at tea,
stooped over inside the
dining room, ears protruding out the roof. Even Kasumi was showing some
nervousness at this,
she wasn't sure she had enough tea, come to think of it.
<Oh my, how he drinks.. I will have to break out the Tendo Family
Supersecret Mega Tea-set. It
has been in our family for a long time, and never has such a dire need for
it come up.> Kasumi
looked quizzically at the cupboards, pondering the complexities of life,
the universe, and
everything as she made tea in a pot taller than she was.
Serving a cauldron of tea to P-Zilla, Kasumi sat at the only remaining part
of the table next to
Akari. Ryouga, for his part, was most polite despite his size, and
diligently sipped at the tea,
trying to make conversation. This of course resulted in muffled bwees and
grunts, much to the
distaste of P-Chan. <This is all Ranma's fault!>
Tendo Kasumi turned to Akari, "Is the tea alright?" She queried. Akari
smiled and politely
responded that it was excellent, however she would like another cup. Kasumi
literally
DRAGGED the tea-vat in and poured for Akari, then tried to pour more for
P-chan, who by this
time had sipped up enough from his cauldron to at least get low.
Unfortunately, the vat was just a bit too much for Kasumi, and when it
tipped, she couldn't stop it
from falling and splashing all over P-Zilla.
***
Two hours later, a clothed Ryouga sat sheepishly at the table as he
explained exactly what was
going on to both the women. Kasumi hasn't been that dense so as to not at
least realize this, and
even the most gentle of the Tendos looked miffed at him for sleeping in her
sister's bed.
Ryouga attempted, without luck, to explain this away. However, Kasumi
seemed unreceptive and
Akari just kept STARING at him.. In an unnerving way that made Ryouga want
to scream. Or
break something like a large boulder, perhaps. Or even tackle her to the
ground, rip off her
clothes and..
Akari and Kasumi looked, concerned, at a profusely nosebleeding Ryouga who
lay twitching on
the ground.
***
Watching from their hiding place, Brain and Pinky were amazed.. This huge
beast was actually a
man!
"Do you know what this means Pinky?"
"Not really Brain, but I never do.."
"It means he'll be even easier to control!"
"Oh.. I'd hoped it would be something more interesting."
***
An extremely exhausted Ryouga Hibiki stumbled down the street of yet
another town, in
yet another place, bruised and filthy from weeks of wandering around the
general area of the
northern hemisphere. Finally, he could walk no more, and he collapsed on
the ground, the world
going black before him.
Dear Diary,
I ended up in my home town yesterday, while looking for the bathroom of
the Tendo
Dojo. My father says he found me sprawled outside in the driveway, where
Shiro-kuro had
dragged me by the teeth. She's a good dog, and her babies are doing quite
well, or so I hear!
Right now, they're looking for the rest of my family, under father's orders.
This is a most
important event going on now, diary. Not as important as Akane or killing
Ranma or anything
like that! My father tells me of a problem our family currently has with a
feud. I never paid much
attention to family matters before, as I was usually on the road (so to
speak.) It seems the Hibiki
clan has a quarrel with our neighbors who moved here from Scotland years
ago- The MacNally
clan. According to family history, a few decades ago the head of the
MacNally family *used* a
Hibiki to make a fortune. Mr. Rand attached surveying equipment to my
great-uncle, and made
maps of many places using the information from a Hibiki! Outrageous, huh?
Sounds like
something Ranma would do. I wonder if the Saotomes are related to this
horrid family? Heh,
probably one of their daughters is engaged to Ranma. That lecherous
Saotome! I'll rip his fool
head off! And then, ah! Akane and I will... Er.. Sorry for the drool on the
page diary, hehe..
Where was I? Oh! Anyhow, we're all assembling, dad says there may be a big
fight, and soon. I
will use this to improve my skills so I can challenge Ranma again!
-Ryouga
***
"So son, how are things?" The elder Hibiki looked at Ryouga with a proud
eye, not having seen
his son in some time. Ryouga smiled back weakly at his graying father,
asking himself, 'When did
my father have time to go gray?"
"Oh, things are fine.. Still haven't caught that rotten Saotome yet, though."
"Saotome? Ah, I remember when you had him over for milk and cookies! What
a fine young lad,
you two... Rotten?" Ryouga stared at his father, coming to the
not-so-gentle realization that he
hadn't really talked to his father since middle school. "Oh, well, er.."
Ryouga stumbled, unsure of
what to tell his old man. Should he tell him that he blamed Ranma for all
the problems in his life?
The old man probably didn't know that he even had any. "Say! Pop! Let me
tell you about this
girl.. She's really beautiful, and well, umm, her name is Akane.." Change
of subject was good,
Ryouga decided. He could tell his father another time about Saotome. As
the night fell, father
and son began to catch up on days lost to wandering the Earth.
"So this girl, do you wish her for your wife?"
"Yes, but she's engaged to that jerk Ranma!"
"Oh, I see.. Son, your mother was engaged to my brother but I still
managed to
get her. Don't give up hope."
"Really? How did you manage to marry mom then?"
"Your uncle got lost and I wandered into the wedding.."
***
Dear Diary,
Hi, me again. Who else would it be? Some good news, some bad news..
Good news is,
pop and I have caught up on some old times.. Bad news, he spilled a pot of
cold tea mom made
three of four months ago on me by accident , and knows about my curse. Oh,
the house is kinda
gutted now, too.. Ehh.. Well.. Other then that, things are good. I haven't
been lost more then
twice since I got here, as at least one of the pups has been by my side
since I got here! Mom
arrived today, as well as some of my siblings.. Honestly, is being a hippie
becoming of a Hibiki?
Looks to be one interesting fight. A window got knocked out today by a
stone with a note tied to
it, grr..
-Ryouga
***
Kasumi fumed. While the two words don't often go into a sentence, she
REALLY fumed.
Ryouga. Was. Sleeping. In. Bed. With. Her. Engaged. Little. Sister. Kasumi
was PISSED.
She came to realize that she had washed Ryouga's clothes whenever she had
found them laying
around. That she had always fed him and been cheery to him whenever he
seemingly popped out
of nowhere. When he destroyed the dojo time after time in fights with
Ranma, she had thought
them really great friends..
Brain observed Kasumi, whom despite her housewife skills hadn't noticed him.
This girl would be
useful, most certainly. Her anger was obvious. Now how to turn her to
their advantage?
**END Part III***
Coming next: Part IV, the MacNally feud erupts! Can Shiro-Kuro find all the
Hibikis in time?
Stay tuned for more lame next episode teasers next time on.. *BAP* Ow!!!
Notes by the author:
In case you haven't figured it out by now, remember all the biiiig animals
in the Ryugenzawa
forest? Ok, now.. (Puts on Washuu teacher disguise)
If P-chan is an animal and the water makes all the animals biiiiggg....
Then wouldn't P-chan also be transformed by several exposures to the water?
YES! Congrats!!!
TAH-DAH! Since he's not still being continuously exposed to the water,
P-chan is shrinking at a
slow rate until he reaches a stable height.. Which will be about as tall as
Akane.
comments to FFML, or if they're too nasty, jurai@microserve.net ne? :D
Nabs, Aka, Marla Miner
Pizza slayer productions..OW!!! Hey!
thhpth :P~
Please note that
1. This is NOT a dark fic. It is a comedy-type thing. It is meant to be
stupid at times, silly at
others, and just plain dumb the rest of the time. If you notice anything
too serious, don't worry,
that's not a problem! It won't stay serious.
2. C&C is most certainly appreciated, a "Way to go" or "shut the hell up" is
fine.. But if you don't
like the story line or want too many changes, remember, I'm not writing this
to sell. I'm writing it
to have fun and maybe entertain a few people. So don't flip out if I don't
make a few changes to
my misspellings or repost the damn thing because a grammatical error, ok? :D
3. There is no cruelty to pizzas in this. I do not slay pizzas! Honest!! I
don't have a bad habit of
stepping in them, ok? GET IT STRAIGHT! ^^;;;
Nabsie ^^
---------------------------
High preistess-Church of SD
---------------------------
Marla "Pizza Slayer" Miner
THE LOST P-CHAN AVENGER!