At 15:23 07/05/97 -0500, you wrote:

On Wed, 7 May 1997, Redneck Gaijin wrote:

Who's talking about -Ranma's- assumptions? That's -my- view of how

Akane is

portrayed here.

["I'm angry. It MUST be Ranma's fault! I'll punish him for existing!"]

 That is how the manga protrays her.  She attacks Ranma at the slightest
assumption.  As for the cooking incident, well, despite the fact that it
turns out toxic all the time, she continues to try and fail.  She never
listens to Ranma, and always assumes that he is making fun of it.  Why did
she try in the first place?  Simple.  She temporarily snapped under the
strain.

Don't buy into it.

For every occasion in which Akane mallets Ranma, there is an open-hand slap,
a toss-over-shoulder, a splash of cold water, or- *gasp* - nothing. Akane is
*NOT* so mindlessly violent as you portray her. 

True, but stress and strain brought out the worst of everyone. Unless you
are not human. :)

 The incident in the dojo?  Explainable.  Akane was angry that this
"fake" Ranma had taken over the body of her fiancee.  Notice how she
treats Ranma no better than Nodoka.  Thus, she was quite likely to
explode at any given time.  Maybe I should put this in?

No, you should get rid of the angle altogether. Leaving aside the fact that
Takahashi already DID this story once, Akane is not such a homicidal maniac
as you seem bent on starting her out as. 

Not necessarily, as long as it's relevant to the story or complements the
chapter it is in.

While I'm on things which don't work, what's with the curse? Suddenly
Ranma's curse is locked into place, with no explanation whatsoever. Within
the framework of the R 1/2 universe, there is zero credibility for this.
Explanation of some sort is required, and fast.

Not fast, just necessary. You could just implement it into the next chapter.

 Besides which, the fanfic is not done.  I am not going to portray her
the same way through out the entire story.

That's even **WORSE.** Characters *MUST* be consistent with themselves. If
you make a change, it must be believable and supported by internal or
external causes. Turning Akane from Homocidal Violent Bitch into Considerate
Mournful Martyr overnight just plain won't cut it.

At least I agree with this. Inconsistency without reasonable explanation is
detrimental to the flow of the fic concerned.

As much as I would prefer you buried this concept under peat moss and
composted it for a year or so, I would point to the above as required
changes to make this fic workable in and of itself.

Oh, and one other thing; the fic has absolutely zero comedic content. That,
above all else, is a fatal flaw in any Ranma fic, IMHO.

Awww, please. I can't believe that you insist that any Ranma fanfic must
have some form of comedy in it. Give me a break! What we are writing here
is fanfiction; to be read by anybody all over the world with different
tastes. Writing fanfiction also meant creativity and experimentation and
not one which must at least adhere to the original manga the fic was based
on. You can easily get as much enjoyment out of reading a Ranma comedy as
well as a serious Ranma fic; unless of course, you happened to be a purist.
Us authors often base our fics' contents(?) on our emotions - you can't
expect us to be 100% happy all the time, could you? Nobody is stopping you
from not reading a fic you don't like. So please don't criticise anybody's
fic contents(?) unless it's relevant. This sentence about the fic haven't
absolutely zero comedic content is just plain pointless, not to say
annoying as well. There, I have said my piece. Time to retire for the night
or should I say morning?
  

Redneck

MT
martin.tie@virgin.net
'Some people!!!!'