At 13:31 05/05/97 MDT, you wrote:

This story is by Ryan Anderson <andersor@nag.cs.colorado.edu>.

This was great!

I second that....partially

thanks!!!! ;)

I for one really liked the way Nodoka was portrayed. Too often she's
used as a plot device, as someone for the author to talk through and
whip the characters into shape.

That's the way I've always felt too, and it was my hope with this story to
show her in a little less-than-flattering way.

TOO less-than-flattering. Considering that Nodoka was generally portrayed
as a kind albeit very old fashioned and strict in both OAV's and manga, it
made me a bit disturbed at the way Nodoka reacted in this fic. I could
handle her sending Ranma into exile (hopefully temporarily) due to
over-reaction but the way her thoughts ran in this fic made me feel that
you are not doing her fair justice and that you are also treating her
rather harshly

I still think your story could be served
better by a more balanced portrayl of Akane, especially considering the
wonderful depth you've given to the other characters.

Yeah, I've been rather harsh on Akane, haven't I? I've gotten quite a
number of complaints about my treatment of her, so maybe I'll have to do
something about it <ideas begin quagulating in Ryan's brain... not that
this is nessisarily a good thing...> ;)

Again, I also agree on the harsh treatment....it is just not like Akane,
and Nabiki for that matter, to over-react to such an extreme

BTW, I agree with you that a Shampoo-Mousse relationship probably
wouldn't work. I know which character I think would be good for Mousse,
but I ain't saying who until I get a chance to use the idea myself. You
can't have it! It's mine! :-)

;) Can't wait to see it! Of course, can you guess who Mousse is going to
end up with in my fanfic? ;)

Ryan

Sorry for the negative comments but that is just me voicing my displeasure.
Overall, the fic is rather good though not to my taste. Anyway keep up the
good work.

MT
martin.tie@virgin.net
'observe and you will learn'