It's a chilling story so far.  It's definately believable that under the
right circumstances, Ranma can turn into a cold-thinking killer.  The only
thing that bothered me was that you switched tenses every once in a while.
Try keeping it past tense, okay?  Otherwise, I'm rubbing my hands wondering
how Ryoga will react to this 'other' Ranma.

============================================================================
/===\     LaShawn M. Taylor (shonnie@zeus.anet-chi.com) 
|^ ^|\    "Hey! Where's the cream filling?!" -Hostess cupcake commercial
 \v/\|    "Life is such unutterable hell, solely because it is sometimes
    |\    beautiful..." -T.H. White "The Troll"
    \|    "You come with steam of breath and caligula's head
	  To me so lonesome and longing and so unsatisfied
	  Even with all this beauty flooding deep into my eyes."
				-Poi Dog Pondering
============================================================================