On Mon, 7 Apr 1997 14:40:27 +1000 (GMT+1000), you wrote:

At 07:31 AM 6/04/97 -0400, gaffney@iconn.net wrote:

Now:  it's time for the 1997 contest.  The object is to create the worst
opening for an anime fanfic in the entire world.  Just an utterly evil
opening.

Let's not forget the massive X-over type fic:

In a battle for truth, justice, and the right to glomp onto people of the
opposite sex, they came from all corners of the globe and beyond, from this
and other times. They are the elite of the ecchi. The paragons of perversity.
They are...
The lord of lechery, the leader of our last hope, Happosai.
The greatest of glompers, Ataru Moroboshi.
The paragon of peekers, Mackie Stingray.
And joining them (somewhat unwillingly) in their battles, Urd, the goddess 
of love.
Together, they are the only hope for the world. May the gods help us all...
They are... The Hentai Hero Squad. And this is their story...

LOL^o^ 
Oh man, what a combination. I feel sorry for Urd.

Urd:(Trying to electrocute Happousei) Get away from me you hentai. I'll kill you
for glomping onto my chest like that.

Happousei:(Jumps out of way) Me?! I'm jus' a sweet old man. Why would I try and
do somethin' like that?

(Ataru, seeing that the beautiful Goddess was occupied dealing with Happousei,
seizes the oppertunity and glomps onto her, his head pressed firmly on her
chest)

Urd:Eeeeekkk.(Electrocutes Ataru) Take that, you hentai!!!!

(Ataru is unfazed. Afterall, Lum's constant electrocution of him made him immune
to this form of treatment. Ataru continues to glomp onto Urd. Makie is staying a
good distance away, enjoying the scene as it unfolds before him)

Makie:(To himself)Wow, this is much better than spyin' on my sis...

The saddest thing about this is that I will go write the story to this one
day, when I have the spare time. If that makes it ineligable, so be it.

I don't know about anytone else, but I beleive there's no way you can get this
wrong. It's a goldmine!!!


-OneShot
Jeffrey Keith Wong: oneshot@ascensionet.com
If you're interested in reading all my fanfics, check:
http://www.rit.edu/~jkw7063/fanfic/index.htm 
http://www.ascensionet.com/oneshot/index.htm
The latter site has been updated recently.
"There are two types of roses in this world: One is 
where you stop to smell. The other is reading this"