Ok, started writing this a few years ago, and just recently undertook the
task of rewriting it.
I took to writing script for this story because (IMHO) script sometimes
fits the original flavor of Ranma 1/2 better. The sequel will NOT
be written this way. Remember folks, this one's just for phun! Not
a serious, in depth look into the character resumes of the series! ~>)
C&C appreciated. God bless and good night. ^_^
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Ranma 1/2
"Girls of a similar pool"
By Joshua Phillips-Seames
Characters based on the originals by Takahashi Rumiko
PART 1
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(Our story begins at the Tendou Martial Arts Training hall
where Genma is sparring with Ranma)
(Genma tries as he might but can't seem to strike Ranma)
Ranma: (dodging; in a mocking sort of way) Hey pop, what's the matter?
Genma: (landing from a leap he wipes his brow) All right
young scamp, prepare for me this time!
(Genma leaps at Ranma faking toward his left but turns
around and heads for his back)
Ranma: (Unaware that Genma is heading for his back) Ha ha ha!
Getting slow there, old man! Huh?
Ranma: Aaaaaaaaaaaaa! (The force of Genma's blow hits Ranma's back
with such magnitude it flings him across the yard and into the pool.)
(SPLASH!)
Ranma-chan: (Ranma-chan leaps from the pool screaming)
Aaaaaaaahhhh! That's c-cc--c-c-old!
(Genma recovers from his leap and laughs his head off)
Genma: Getting sloppy there, boy! Ha ha ha ha ahhahahahahahah...
(Ran-chan dumps a bucket of water over his head)
Panda-chan: <panda noises> Mmmph! Mrr! Mrr!
Ranma-chan: Who's sloppy now, ji-san?
(a rumble can be heard in the background)
Voice <distant>: YAAAAAHH!!!! DIE, YOU DAMN WRINKLED WART!!!!
Voice <old man's>: BWA HAHAHAHA!!!! SWEET-O! COME WITH ME, MY
SILKY DARLINGS!
Voices <several females>: DIE, YOU PERVERTS! SICKO! HENTAI! DON'T LET
THEM GET AWAY!
Ranma-chan: (getting out of the pool) Huh?
(a large explosion noise can be heard, the kicking of a small object...or
person as it were....)
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!
Old man's voice: AAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
(that person comes hurling through the sky, yelling, with a trail of
panties and bras falling out of the bag on his back - it's Happosai; he
falls and hits Ran-chan on the head)
Ranma-chan: OW! (grabs a dazed Happosai) What trouble have you caused now,
you old letch?!!
(Happosai comes to)
Happosai: Eh? SWEET! (glomps onto Ran-chan's chest) My Darling Ranma-chan!
Please beguile an old man one moment of happiness by...(holding up a pink
lacy bra)..wearing THIS!
Ranma-chan: WHAT? Why you....(clenched fists)
Voice <closer than before>: CLAWING CAT ATTACK!!!
(both Ran-chan and Happy turn towards the direction of the voice)
Ranma-chan&Happy: Nani?
(a huge explosion engulfs the outer-wall and them in the process)
Ranma-chan: (swirling eyes; tongue sticking out) gaaaaa....
Panda-chan: (on his back; sign) Ouch.
Happosai: (half-sticking out of the dojo's walls) .....
Ranma-chan: (comes to; jumps up quickly; attains a defensive poise)
WHO THE...??
(a hole in the wall reveals nothing but light with a dark figure looming
in the center)
Happosai: (pops out of hole in dojo wall and runs over by Ran-chan) Hmmm...
(assesses the damage and the figure; rubs his chin) The lad's stronger than
I thought!
Ranma-chan: What the hell is that? Or WHO is that? (quickly takes a kettle
of hot water from hammerspace and pours it on himself)
(the figure walks out into the yard; its a young man about Ranma's age,
wearing a green tanktop, light pants, and sporting a bananna not too much
unlike Ryouga's; he has a head full of dark blonde, spiky hair, and is
wearing a knapsack. He looks stern and a tad miffed, his eyes glaring...
his face is also a little dirty and bruised.)
Man: (throws off his backpack; apparently not having noticed Ranma change)
YOU OLD, COWARDLY PERVERT!! COME OUT AN' FACE ME!
Happosai: (gets behind Ranma and shoves him forward) I'm afraid a poor old
man like me couldn't handle such violence. I'm shifting all responsibility
upon my pupil!
Ranma: (puts foot down on Happy's head) Shut up and die, old man!
Man: (looks at Happy; grins) Feh...If you're brave enough to start stealing
underwear, then you're brave enough to face me. (to Ranma) I pity you,
having a master like this.
Ranma: (picks up Happy) Feh! This ain't my master! This is hentai droppings!
Happosai: (whops Ranma upside the head) Ranma! Don't be so disrespectful
of your teacher!
Ranma: (tosses Happy to the man) Take the bastard...Whatever he did, he
probably deserves it.
Man: Thanks. (to Happy) I'm gonna enjoy every minute of this...
(winds up for a drop kick; eyes wander up for a second and he freezes)
Huh?
(view shows the TENDOU DOJO sign on the outside wall)
Man: TEN--DOU??!!
(Happosai takes advantage by grabbing the man's arm and flinging
him with his pipe into the dojo wall)
Happy: (sitting and smoking his pipe) Hmmph! Not much of a match.
Ranma: (grinding his fist into Happy's head) Yo! Old man! What's
going on? Who is that guy? (is launched away by Happy's pipe)
YAAAAAHH!!
Happy: (resumes smoking) You left yourself open, Ranma-kun.
(Scene changes: The inside of the house, at the table, all
the Tendous (discluding Nabiki and Akane), Saotomes and the
mysterious young man are kneeling. Happosai is sitting
on the porch, relaxing. The young man sips some tea that
has been served to him.
Everyone studies him a bit closer than before. With a full
head of dark short blond hair. He has quiet green eyes, and
a scar across his left knuckle.)
Young man: Thank you for your hospitality. I suppose I
should tell why I am here.
My name is Tatiwan Kinso. I am the last of the heirs to
the "Tatiwan School of Tactical Mid-Air Martial Arts" and
"School of Animal Fist Martial Arts."
Ranma: (perks up a bit at the sound of the words "martial arts")
2 Schools?
Kinso: (smiles slightly) Hai. Both were conceived on different
sides of my family.
Happy: (thinking) If I can learn those techiques, I could teach
Ranma some respect!
Ranma: (thinking) If I can learn those techniques, I could kick
that old pervert's butt anytime of the week! (recedes) Not like
I can't right now of course, but... (outloud) Ahh...I bet it's
not as powerful as Anything Goes Martial Arts.
Kinso: (grins) I'm not sure myself. I would like to find out sometime
however, Ranma. (sees right through Ranma's ploy; raises an eyebrow)
Thanks for the challenge.
Ranma: (gawking in suprise) Uhh, wait a minnit! I didn't mean...
Kinso: Tendou-sensei. I hope I'm not too hasty in asking to learn under
you as a pupil. I cannot pay you anything, except offer my services
around the house doing housework or whatever needs to be repaired.
Soun: (drinking his tea) Hmm...it *has* been awhile since I *actually*
took to teaching a pupil. However...
Kinso: Yes?
Soun: Housework is hard to find for you since Kasumi does much of the
cleaning and cooking around.
Kasumi: (setting a teapot down) Not so, father. Did you notice the rather
large holes in the dojo walls?
Soun: Nani? (views the formerly unnoticed damage; Ranma and Genma look
downcast, avoiding his glance; a teardrop forms on Soun's head) I see.
(folds his arms) Saotome-kun, what happened this time?
Genma: Ahh...it was all the boy's fault.
Ranma: WHAT? (picks up a bucket of water and douses Genma)
Panda-chan: (sign) I was helpless to stop him.
Ranma: What a lousy father.
Soun: (sobbing) Saotome-kun! Ranma-kun! Must you continue to destroy my
beautiful dojo?!
Ranma: Don't look at us! It was that old pervert's fault! (pointing to
Happosai)
Panda-chan: (sign) Don't listen to the boy! (another sign) He's delusional!
Ranma: (hits Panda-chan) Shaddup!
Happosai: Heh, heh. (looks over his back; an evil look in his eye)
Genma: (holding a bucket; apparently doused himself) Now you've done it
boy! You've incurred the master's wrath!
Ranma: (waves his hand) Feh. I can take that old hentai anyday.
(Genma grabs Ranma and forces him to bow to Happy)
Genma: Now, APOLOGIZE, and maybe the master will have mercy!
Ranma: (grunts) Apologize to what, pop?!
(Genma looks at the place Happy sat; it's currently unoccupied)
Genma: What the...? Acck! He's gone! (holds up a finger) That can only
mean one thing! (close up; he gives the 'evil omen' face)
Soun: (nervous) H-he's planning something....insidious?
Genma: (nods grimly) Hai. This does not bode well.
Kasumi: Father? Tatiwan-san seems to be in shock.
(the rest of the room returns its attention to Kinso.)
Kinso: (eyes wide) Ahh...ahh...(obtains a serious look; to Genma)
Jusenkyo?
Genma: (lets go of Ranma; sits down and nods) You've heard of it?
Kinso: (relaxes) Hai. Although, I never imagined actually meeting
any of its victims. (blank stare for a second) Uhh, I've just
actually heard of the legends when traveling through China.
I thought it was just that...a legend. (sips tea)
(the wind blows slightly in the silence)
Soun: So, can you show me what you have learned so far, Tatiwan-san?
Kinso: (perks up a bit and grins) Yes. I'll need an opponent. (his
eyes turn to Ranma)
Genma: (laughs; slaps Ranma on the back) Here's your chance, my boy!
Show him what a Saotome is made of!
Ranma: I won't go easy on you! (thinking) NOW is the time to learn
these new moves.
Kinso: (laughs) Good! I like a challenge!
(Scene: the yard. Soun, Genma, and Kasumi sit on the porch.
Ranma and Kinso are standing on opposite sides of the yard, doing
various stretches and warmups.)
Genma: You know, Tendou-kun, I've been thinking.
Soun: What's that, Saotome-kun?
Genma: Really, the only one who did anything was the boy. Therefore,
I don't think we should be worried about facing the master's wrath.
Soun: Saotome-kun...YOU'RE BRILLIANT!!
(both laugh hysterically, akin to Kodachi)
Kinso: (flexes his fingers and cracks his knuckles; thinking) Hmmm...
I hope don't make a fool of myself...(looks over towards the pond
nervously; sweats a little) Feh, I know they'd understand....but
it's too damn shameful...(clenches his fist)
(meanwhile, on Ranma's side...)
Ranma: (thinking) I hope I don't change in front of the newcomer....that'll
be embarrasing...(grins; still thinking) But, this match should be over
in no time flat! (he stands and nods to Kinso)
Kinso: (nods back) I am ready.
Genma: Show him what for, boy!
Kasumi: Good luck!
Soun: (nods) Fight!
(both boys <or as Ranma would prefer, "men"> leap towards each other. They
ram into each other in the air...and, wouldn't you know it...right over the
pond, too.)
R&K: (still in midair <hovering, apparently>, look at each other) Eh?
(they plummet down creating a huge splash)
Genma: Ranma, you idiot! You left yourself WIDE open!
Voice: What's going on, father?
Soun: Ah, Akane! Nabiki! How was your trip?
Nabiki: (sitting down) Fine, except anyone who even gave Akane a
second look got pounded.
Akane: (blushing) Onee-chan! They were oogling me!!
Nabiki: That's only because you put about 5 guys into full-body
casts.
Akane: (blushing more; arguing the point) I did not! They only needed
arm casts!
Soun: HAHAHA! Nabiki, Nabiki. She was only doing such things in order to
save herself for Ranma! HAHAHA!
Akane: (defiant) I WAS NOT! I'M NEVER GONNA MARRY THAT PERVERT!!
Ranma-chan: (from the pond) And I'm not too hot about marrying a kawaiikun
hysteric.
Genma: You sure took your time in the pond there. I was wondering if we'd
be needing to call an ambulance. Now, explain yourself! How could you leave
yourself open like that?!!
Ranma-chan: Oh, shut up old man! (rests arms on the side of pond) Now I've
got yet another person who knows about my less-than-manliness.
Soun: What happened to Tatiwan-san?
(as if to answer that point, bubbles start rising to the surface of the pond)
Ranma: (turns to the bubbling) Nani?
(A figure splooshes up from the belly of the pond; there is a stunned
silence.)
Ranma-chan: (shocked) A-are you for real?!
(The others are paused in amazement; the figure that used to be Kinso is now
an exact duplicate of...Ranma-chan.)
End Part 1
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