Okay, here's my next draft of Mikado Ichiban 12: 'Love Strikes!'  
Barring any complaints of glaring errors, this is pretty much complete.  :)

---------------

[We open to a room in the Shiratori residence.  The walls are a lovely shade
of pink, and crayon pictures hung in frames are hung up in a few places. 
the furniture is big and cushiony, and in one of these oversized chairs is
Azusa, who is studiously reading a manga.  As she's going along, she mouths    
the words.  She's reading so intently, she doesn't notice that Juyza has walked 
into the room.  He peers over her shoulder, and scoffs.]

Juyza: 'Koko wa Greenwood'?  Those shojo manga rot your brains urchin.  

Azusa: [sticks her tongue out at Juyza] Like I care what you think, Ju-chan!

Juyza: [flinches] You -know- I hate that name..  I'm not one of your damn
       pets...

Azusa: [puts down her manga] Ju-chan!  Ju-chan!  [Azusa leaps up, arms open
       wide]  Come to widdle Azusa!!

Juyza: {I knew they couldn't be good for her} 

[Juyza makes a bee-line for the door, leaving as fast as he possibly can. 
Azusa calms down, and giggles.]

Azusa: Ju-chan is so fun!  

[Azusa picks up her manga, and walks up to a closet.  She opens the door,   
revealing a small walk-in closet, filled to the ceiling with..  Manga.]

Azusa: What to read next...  [picks out some random comic, the pile
       wobbling a bit.]  'High School Romance #1'!  A kawaii classic!!  [Azusa
       sighs, hugging the manga.]  If only such wonderful things could happen 
       to Azusa..

[Azusa beams brightly, as a faded image of Mikado appears in the background.
He turns towards the camera, and smiles in that flirtatious way of his. 
Azusa hugs the manga even tighter.]
 
 Azusa: It'd be so kawaii...
 
 ------------------------------------------------------------------

[scene fades to black, theme music starts playing.]

[An series of images flash (to the drum beat of the theme song) on the screen: 
first one of Mikado, then one of Azusa, followed by a group picture of Phrank, 
Josie, Mikami, and Ryuuken.  It flashes one more time, showing a picture of 
Mikado being hounded by Hikaru-chan as Chance looks on in the background.  It 
is replaced with a slow pan of Kolkhoz High School, the sun sparkling in the 
background.  Mikado skates by, graceful and calm as a horde of females follow 
him.  Josie is cheering in the background, while Phrank is sitting down, looking 
at her wistfully. The scene changes to an ice rink, where Mikado and Azusa are 
fighting against a large group of people.  Noticeable characters are Ranma, 
Ryuuken, Kazue, and Wakai. Azusa breaks off from the fight to pick up a coin 
that was dropped on the ice, and all of the skaters descend upon Mikado. This
scene ends, and the camera opens on Mikado posing.  Azusa jumps onscreen, 
hugging on to him tightly.  The animation stops with Mikado trying to get away 
from Azusa, who is pulling at the tie he is wearing. The music stops, and the 
screen fades to black.]

------------------------------------------------------------------

Mikado Ichiban: Zembun Otoko! 
Episode 12: Love Strikes


[Sanzenin Manor, inside a waiting room.  Mikado is idly laying back on a
couch, tossing a ball up into the air, and catching it.  At a desk in the
same room, Hikaru is trying to write something.  He is steadily gaining a
tick in his eye, which is being caused by the sound of Mikado catching the
ball.]

Hikaru: Do you have to do that in here?

Mikado: [distractedly] Do what?

[Hikaru walks over, and grabs the ball out of Mikado's hands.]

Hikaru: THAT, Mikado.  What the heck are you doing here anyways?  It's only
        a few weeks from the end of the school year, and you're not even
        studying!

Mikado: [smiles] Too much work will only serve to confuse the mind.  I'm
        taking a break, as should you.  I thought we could go out and play a 
        game of catch...

Hikaru: With me?  You think a simple game of catch is going to work as some
        kind of peace-maker?  Yeah, right.  [goes back to get his books] Now 
        if you don't mind, I have some studying to do.  [storms out of the room]

Mikado: [blinks a few times]  {Why doesn't anybody just tell me what's
        wrong?}

[Mikado shrugs, and goes back to tossing the ball.]

Mikado: Bored, bored, bored...  If I leave, I'll have to train, and I'm just
        not up for that today...  [gets up] Unless I go somewhere no one 
        will be looking for me...  Yes, I think a nice walk to Nerima would 
        do me some good...  

[Mikado smirks, and goes out to the entrance hall, and puts on a jacket. 
He's almost to the door when the phone rings.  He stops, looking between the
door, and the phone.  He shrugs, and opens the door.]

Mr. Sanzenin: [calling from some other room] Mikado!!  It's your coach!

[Mikado cringes, but recovers his expression before Mr. Sanzenin makes his
way into the entrance room, phone in hand.]

Mr. Sanzenin:  Oh!  He's already on his way!  What a responsible, upright
               son I have!!  [begins to sob with joy, and some canned sobs can 
               also be heard - from the phone.] 

Koichi: [sounds quiet, though he must be speaking loudly if he can be heard
        from where Mikado's standing]  A miracle!  The boy finally knows
        responsibility!!

[Mikado simply leaves, not saying a word, shaking his head.]

Mikado: {So much for that idea...}

-=-

[Back at Azusa's place, Azusa is still in her room reading shojo manga.]

Azusa: Oh, it's so darling how they have a private meeting at school on a
       weekend!  And then, he walks her home....  And tells her his true feelings! 
       [squeals with delight] Kawaii!

[There's a knock on the door, and Juyza pokes his head in.]

Juyza: Hey, rugrat, it was the coach.  He wants you and Mikado to put in an
       extra training practice today.  Mikado's already on his way to the rink.

[Juyza leaves quickly, leaving Azusa looking quite stunned.  She looks down
at the manga, then up again.  The brightness of her smile goes up yet
another notch.]

Azusa: [calling out] Thanks, Ju-chan!

[Vague crashing noises can be heard outside the room.  Azusa giggles, and
gets up.  She checks her reflection carefully in the mirror, and heads off.]

-=-

[Cut to the Kolkhoz High skating rink.  Koichi is his regular calm, rigid
self.  Well, at least he's trying.  In fact, a smile is crossing his face at
the moment.  Out on the ice are Mikado Azusa, Ryuuken and Hirotaka. 
Amazingly, no one is fighting.]

Koichi: Very good, people!  I don't want to see any slouching off here, we
        have the last competition of the year coming up in a week, and I want 
        to see gold in both the singles and doubles competition!

Hirotaka: [calling out, after landing a triple lutz] You can expect a silver
          as well!  [skates past Ryuuken] Isn't that right, Ryuuken?  [grins, 
          and skates off]

Ryuuken: [A look of amusement almost crosses his face.]  We'll be seeing
         who's eating -who's- dust in a week, Hiro...

[The two skate around each other, leaping right in front of each other, but
managing not to crash.]

Koichi: Let's not get hasty!  There's some serious contenders out there this
        year.  [smirks]  {Though they don't benefit from -my- training...}

Mikado: [getting into the practice, tossing Azusa up into a triple loop]  And
        when was the last time we didn't win first place?  Surely you don't 
        expect anyone to be a serious challenge...

Hirotaka: Except maybe Furinkan... [chuckles]

Mikado: [stiffens] That wasn't funny.

Hirotaka: Depends on your point of view...  [flashes a toothy smile at
          Mikado as he skates by]

Mikado: [laughs] One of these days, that mouth of yours is going to get you
        into trouble, Hiro...

Hirotaka: So long as it isn't you guys, I can probably handle it!

[They skate around, and Koichi watches on, a -very- content smile on his
face.]

Koichi: {At least they can keep their differences settled for this
        competition.  If only it were so all the time...}

[Koichi shrugs, and watches on.]

Koichi: {Best just to count the blessings I have...}

-=-

[Slow fade out, and then fade back in, to the same place, except all
the skaters are standing at the entrance to the ice.]

Koichi: I have to admit, if you skate as well as you did today at the
        competition, you won't have any problems at all...  Just keep your
        concentration, and you'll all do fine.

[They all nod, and start to leave, when a small cough is heard from the ice.
They all turn around, to see Hikaru-chan standing at the other side of the
rink.  She's dressed in a cream-coloured dress, and her hair is pinned back.  
She does a little curtsey, and skates gracefully out to the middle of the 
ice.  Classical music begins to play through the arena's loudspeakers. Hikaru
begins a complicated succession of skating moves, all fluid and flowing, 
perfectly timed to the music.  She leaps during the crescendos, and her 
face conveys perfectly the feeling of the music.  As the music comes to an 
end, so does Hikaru, who stops right in front of the gaping group.]

Hikaru: I was wondering...  If you had an entry for the skate dancing
        category..?

Koichi: [dumbfounded] I do believe we have one now...

-=-

[Cut to Azusa's personal change room, where she is hurriedly re-reading her
manga.]

Azusa: Ohh, no good...  He tells her how he feels in a park.  San-chan never
       takes me home that way...

[There's a knock at the door, and Azusa quickly hides the manga, and gets up
to the door.  At the door is Mikado.]

Mikado: Ah, hello Azusa.  I was wondering if you'd mind going through Takai
        park today on the way home?  It's such a lovely, sunny day...  Azusa..?

[Azusa is simply looking straight ahead, dazed.  Vaguely, she nods.]

Mikado: [smiles]  Excellent.  Meet me by the back door when you're done
        then.  [walks on down the hall]  {All the better to get to Nerima by...  
        I'm sure Azusa can get home from there...}

[Azusa watches Mikado walk down the hall, looking far too happy for her own
good.]

-=-

[Further down the hall, Mikado walks right past Ryuuken, who's leaning up
beside the door to the men's change room.}

Ryuuken: I heard all that Sanzenin...  Are you toying with Azusa?  

Mikado: Not at all, I simply have...  Business to attend to in Nerima, and
        thought it would be convenient...

Ryuuken: Convenient?  [his temper is rising, but he manages to keep it under
         control]  If you have other things to attend to, why do you let -me- 
         walk her home?

Mikado: [shrugs] If you want.

Ryuuken: Damn it Sanze.....  What?

Mikado: If you want to walk her home from the park, feel free.  I don't
        intend to do so.

Ryuuken: [looking suspiciously at Mikado]  I'll trust you for now Sanzenin. 
         I promised Koichi I'd keep the peace until after the competition, but 
         if this is some kind of trick...

Mikado: It's hardly that, Ryuuken. 

[Mikado walks away, Ryuuken watching him leave.]

Ryuuken: Heh.  {...Perhaps I have been too harsh about all this...}

-=-

[Cut to a small clearing in Takai Park.  Phrank and Josie are seated on a
bench, poring over books.]

Phrank: So...  Are you sure that's how the basis of the steam engine works? 

Josie: If you'd been paying attention in classes instead of staring at
       girls, you would know the answer to that.

Phrank: Can I help it if there are far more interesting things than steam in
        the classroom?  [winks]

Josie: If I remember correctly, you were able to produce your own at times...

Phrank: [grins]  Hehh...  Well, anyways...  

[Josie smiles demurely, hugging her book.]

Josie: Are you -sure- it was homework that you brought me here for?

Phrank: Well, other things had crossed my mind...

-=-

[On a path through the park, running parallel to the bench Josie and Phrank
are at, Mikado and Azusa are walking.  Azusa spends her time between looking
around her, looking at her feet, and (when Mikado's not looking) at Mikado
and her manga.]

Azusa: [Seeing Phrank and Josie, roots for her manga once again.]  {They see
a pair of friends in the park...}  [Azusa looks back up at the couple, and
back at the pages of her book.]  {It's exactly the same!!}

[Though it doesn't seem possible, Azusa's smile goes up a notch.  Mikado
meanwhile, is walking along, looking straight ahead, his hands dug into his
pockets.  He spares the occasional glance in Azusa's direction, but mostly
with a look of mild distaste.  Azusa gets a ponderous look on her face, and
tugs at Mikado's jacket.]

Azusa: Ne, ne Mikado!  Look at those two over there! Aren't they kawaii!!

[Phrank and Josie, upon hearing this, both let out little 'eep's of surprise,
and find some way to concentrate heavily on their books.  In Phrank's case,
an upside-down book.]

Mikado: [shaking his head] Leave the two lovebirds to themselves, Azusa. 
        That's one pair I don't feel the need to break up...

[Mikado and Azusa walk off, Mikado looking almost amused.  Phrank and Josie
both look quite flustered.]

-=-

[Coming along a different path, Mikado and Azusa find themselves right in
front of a water fountain.  Azusa does a double take, and opens up her manga
once more.  A kind of numb shock goes over her face.]

Azusa: {This is it.  Right in front of the water fountain...}

[Mikado walks up to the fountain, playing with the water absently.]

Mikado: Azusa...

Azusa: [rising up in anticipation] Yes..?

Mikado: Well, this is where we part, I have business to attend to...

[Mikado turns around, and heads off down a path, heading towards Nerima. 
Azusa deflates, quickly.]

Azusa: [quietly] Ano...  San-chan?  [Mikado doesn't hear her, and keeps on
       walking]  San-chan!

[Mikado stops, and turns around.]

Mikado: Yes?

Azusa: Aren't you going to tell Azusa?

Mikado: [blinks] Ah, tell you..  What?

Azusa: [confused]  The place is right, the time...  Everything happened like
       in the manga, but you haven't told Azusa that you love me!!

[Mikado blinks, and then blinks some more.  Then his eyes start scanning for
escape routes...]

Mikado: Excuse me?  I'm sure I heard that wrong...

Azusa: No!  Azusa is right!  San-chan, you love Azusa, ne?  It's all right
       if you say it!!

Mikado: [backing away] Well...  As I said, I have business to attend to. 
        Yes!  Very important business.  I'm...  Sorry, Azusa.

[Mikado walks off in the direction of Nerima, leaving behind a bewildered
Azusa.]

Azusa: [holding back a sniffle] San-chan....

-=-

[Meanwhile, from the standard hiding position behind a bush (tm), Ryuuken is
crouched down, watching the whole affair.  His face is a mixture of
emotions..]

Ryuuken:  {He didn't say no!  But it's obviously his answer..  Sanzenin you
          spineless...  But then, it does leave Azusa all alone for me...  Hmm...}

[With great determination, Ryuuken gets up from his hiding spot, and
walks up to Azusa, who is standing still, looking off in the direction
Mikado went.]

Ryuuken: A..  Azusa!  Fancy meeting you here!

[Azusa turns around slowly to face Ryuuken.  Her eyes are misted over a
little, and she suppresses a sniffle, as she pulls back, and smacks Ryuuken
away, possibly into orbit.]

Azusa: Stop chasing me around!!

[Azusa stomps off, leaving Ryuuken to his flight path.]

-=-

[Cut to Mikado, who has finally stopped, resting beside a tree.  He looks
back in the direction he came from, a somewhat hunted look on his face.]


Mikado: Two years of training, and I never noticed that look...  Azusa? 
        In love with me?  This is not a welcome complication...

[Mikado gets up, heading towards Nerima, but pauses.]

Mikado: {After news like that, I have no taste for romance whatsoever... 
        Nerima can wait for a while...} 

[Mikado turns straight around, and walks down the path, away from Nerima. 
After a few moments of thought, he gets off the main train, sneaking through
the tree line.]

-=-

[Back at the Shiratori household, Juyza is strewn out in front of his
computer, typing away, and away....  he doesn't even notice when Azusa walks
in the door.  Nor does he notice as she walks sullenly through the entrance
hall, and into the former dining hall of the Shiratori household, which now
serves as his living space...  He doesn't even notice when she stands right behind 
him, dramatically sniffling every few seconds.  Well, he tries not to.]

Juyza: [staring into the screen] What is it rugrat?

Azusa: Juyza-kun...

Juyza: [sighs, turning around] What now...

[As soon as he turns around, Azusa bursts into tears, and leaps into Juyza's
arms.]

Azusa: WAHHH!!!!!!  MY SAN-CHAN HATES ME!!!

[Juyza looks -quite- thoroughly disgusted at the display on his shoulders,
especially since it's drowning his shirt.  With a look of
I-really-hate-doing-this, he pats her lightly on the back.]

Juyza: There, there...  [rolled eyes]  What'd the boy toy do this time?

Azusa: WAHH!!!!!!

[Juyza flinches, looking resigned to the fact that Azusa is probably going
to be doing this for some time.]

Juzya: {I don't know what this' about, but you're going down, pretty boy...}
       [he finds a pair of ear plugs, and puts them in.]  {Azusa is -your-
       headache, not mine..}

------------------------------------------------------------------

[Ad break.  An SD Mikado is being chased by an SD Azusa, with an SD Ryuuken
trailing behind her.]

[Fade in to an idyllic scene in front of the city of Foristica.  A few birds
chirp and fly by, singing is heard in the distance.]

Commentator:  The lands of El-Hazzard.  In two parallels, it has been
              visited by the students of Shinonome High.  And now, there's 
              a third.  However, things are a little different this time
              around..
                            
[The music in the background is cut off, the singers quite possibly strangled. 
A foot stomps on screen; an insectoid one.  The camera pans up, to show
Katsuhiko Jinnai sitting atop a bugrom.  Behind him, Queen Deva sits atop
another, longer Bugrom.]

Jinnai: I'm Kastuhiko Jiiiiinai, and I claim this land in the name of the
        Bugrom Empire!
           
[Cut to new scenes, of various citizens of the city being pushed along
forcefully, Of Queen Deva being crowned - by Afura Mann.  Cut to a scene of all
three of the priestesses being imprisoned, shedding silent tears.]

Commentator: All of El-Hazzard has fallen to the Bugrom, and the power of the
             priestesses has been sealed away forever.  Only four people stand
             before their might...
             
[Cut to a scene of Fujisawa, Makoto, Londs, and Nanami, standing outside of a
building in the middle of the forest.  They all look curiously happy and confident.]

Commentator: They don't have numbers on their side...

[Makoto and Fujisawa head towards a smaller, seperate building.  They press a
button, and one wall slides up, revealing what's inside...]

Commentator: They don't have magic...

Londs: You boys be careful out there!

Nanami: Bring back some Bugrom hide for me, guys!

Commentator: But they do have...

[Makoto and Fujisawa walk inside, shrouded in darkness.  A loud rumbling is
heard, then a familliar horn is blared....]

Commentator: ...A really cool car.

[The General Lee bursts out of the garage, past Nanami and Londs, out into the
sunset.  Freeze frame as the General Lee jumps off of a hill, into a group of
oncoming Bugrom...]


THE DUKES OF EL-HAZZARD
A YRN production
Not coming to a TV near you, ever

------------------------------------------------------------------

[We tune back in, to see Kureena Mitsuka, who is holding a microphone in her
hand.  She is standing in the reporter's booth of an arena, which looks down
upon an ice rink, which is currently being smoothened over by a zamboni.]

Kureena: This is Kureena Mitsuka reporting live from the Tokyo High School
         Skating Championships.  Another year, and another golden sweep for Team
         Kolkhoz.  As usual, the 'Golden Pair' of Mikado and Azusa managed a dominating
         victory.  Regardless, they were still criticized.  For elaboration, I take you
         to our colour commentator of the competition.

[The screen blips, and now in front of the camera we have Yuka Sato.]

Kureena: So Ms. Sato, you say that there was a noticeable difference with
         today's showing from the Golden Pair?

Sato: Yes.  While individually Mikado and Azusa both seemed to be in top form,
            neither seemed to flow with the other.  Admittedly, they handily defeated 
            their opposition, but they lacked the grace and fluidity they normally have.

Kureena: So you say they lacked teammanship?

Sato: That's about it, yes.  Alone, each could pull off their own trademark
      moves, but they really didn't win by the margin that they normally had. 
      Also, it was fairly obvious, from the lack of their trademark goodbye whirl. 
      It was almost as if they were afraid to touch each other...

Kureena: [pokes her head onscreen] There you have it, from an expert skater. 
         Are the Golden Pair going through some kind of low point, or is there some
         division among the pair?  This is Kureena Mitsuka, reporting.

-=-

[The television fades to black, and we pull back to see a small television in
the office of Koichi.  Also in attendance is Mikado and Azusa.]

Koichi: It seems everyone's been talking about your problems lately, people. 
        What do you have to say for yourselves?

Mikado: [shrugs] We -won- the competition.  I think that says it all.

Koichi: I expect victory out on the ice, but I also expect your best.  [sitting 
        back in his chair] I was VERY disappointed with yesterday's performance...

Azusa: We did do our very best!

Koichi: Did you, now?  Then why does no one else seem to think so?  [Pauses,
        but goes on before anyone else can speak up.] Obviously this is some kind of
        personal problem.  I want it resolved, and I want it resolved before our next
        weekend practice.  Am I being clear enough?

[Both Mikado and Azusa nod.]

Mikado and Azusa: Hai.

-=-

[Cut to outside the office, in a hallway, just as Mikado and Azusa are exiting.
Mikado closes the door, and Azusa looks at him expectantly.  They walk on down
the hall.]

Mikado: What?

Azusa: What what?

Mikado: Why are you looking at me like that?

Azusa: Azusa is not staring at you!

Mikado: Ah.

[They walk on in silence, eventually leaving the building.  Mikado stops,
looking out into the sunlit sky.  Azusa stops as well.  She takes a bit of time
studying her feet.]

Azusa: San-chan...  You never did answer me yesterday...

[Azusa looks up hopefully, but sees that Mikado has disappeared.  She blinks a
few times.]

-=-

[Around the corner, Mikado is hiding out behind some trees.]

Mikado: {How did she get this idea in her head?}

[Mikado rushes off down a path, but not completely stealthily..]

Hikaru-chan: Dah-ling...

[Hikaru-chan watches Mikado sneak off, a little curiously.  A small gleam is in
her eyes.]

Hikaru-chan: This could be my chance to have you on the ice as well...  We
             could be together at last!

[Hikaru-chan does a happy little dance, but then stops.]

Hikaru-chan: [a little downcast] I just have to think of a plan....

-=-

[Cut to the entrance grounds of Kolkhoz High.  Azusa is wandering around,
looking around in all directions.]

Azusa: San-chan!  Oh Sannn-chaannnn!!

[She keeps on walking around, calling out Mikado's name, as Ryuuken steps onto
the scene.  He bristles with anger when he sees Azusa.]

Ryuuken: {That brute Sanzenin!  Because of him, the media is all over my
         beloved Azusa!}

[Ryuuken composes himself, runs a hand through his hair, and then clears his
throat.  Azusa keeps on walking.  Ryuuken clears his throat a little louder. 
This time, she turns around.]

Azusa: San-ch....  Oh.  It's you.

[Ryuuken doesn't even blanch, but proceeds to remove his sunglasses.  The sun
flashes behind him as he tries to assume some kind of cool pose.  He raises an
eyebrow in curiosity, at the sight behind Azusa.  Mikado is trying very hard to
be quiet, and walk past the pair.  He is motioning to Ryuuken to stay quiet. 
Ryuuken smiles.]

Ryuuken: [just as Mikado is rounding the gate.]  Azusa, what has that monster
         done to you now?

[Mikado turns quickly around, a look of irritation on his face.]

Azusa: [hmphs]  It's none of your business!

Ryuuken: He's not worth it, Azusa!  You must realize that such a pervert
         couldn't possibly appreciate you..

[Mikado is getting more and more agitated, torn between leaving, and causing
Ryuuken severe pain.]

Ryuuken: [softly] He's only your partner, Azusa...  [smiles again]  And not even
         that good of one..

[Mikado looks like he's decided to hurt Ryuuken, but Azusa beats him to it.]

Azusa: Don't say those things about San-chan!!  

[Azusa punts Ryuuken over the school.  Mikado takes the chance to disappear,
while Azusa stands there, sniffling a little.]

Azusa: He's my kawaii San-chan...

-=-

[Cut to a small shopping district within Kolkhoz.  Juyza is just coming out of
the local music store.  In his hands are a pair of CDs - Panthera and Nine Inch
Nails.]

Juzya: [muttering] This ought to drown out her wailing tonight.  If only there
       was a way to get her over the playboy...

[As he walks down the street, Ryuuken comes back down to earth, hard.  Right at
Juyza's feet, actually.]

Juyza: Hm.  [gets Ryuuken to his feet]  This has possibilities..

-=-

[Later in the evening, at the Sanzenin mansion.  Mikado is in his room, laying
back on his bed.]

Mikado: I don't think I'll ever understand that girl...

Chance: Which one would that be?

[Mikado blinks, looking into a dark, shadowy part of the room.]

Mikado: I -really- wish you'd stop doing that.

Chance: Prefer to be left unguarded?

Mikado: There -is- a limit...

Chance: Maybe. But that's what contracts are for.  Anyways, what's the latest
        plague?

Mikado: {I should ask for a re-write...}  Azusa.

Chance: She has a new target of 'kawaii'?

Mikado: Yes.  Me.

[pause]

Chance: That's really sick.

Mikado: [groans, leaning back in his bed.]  You think I don't know that?

Chance: ...But probably easily remedied.

Mikado: [sits up]  Oh really?

Chance: Pretty simple, actually.  We just give her something else to set her
        sights on...

-=-

[The next day, and Mikado's looking a lot more chipper.  He's even smiling as
he enters Kolkhoz High.]

Mikado: {Excellent.  If Chance is right, this should be over by the end of the
        day...  One more day shouldn't be hard.}

[He comes to a stop as he notices the female standing in front of him -
Hikaru-chan.]

Hikaru-chan: Good morning Dah-ling!

Mikado: Ah, good day, Hikaru.

Hikaru-chan: Dah-ling, I hear you and Azusa are having problems on the ice... 
             Ne, wouldn't it be -wonderful- if we were paired up instead?

Mikado: [backing away slightly]  Yes, that'd be just...  Perfect. 

Hikaru-chan: [giggles] Hai!  We would be great, our love for each other
             displayed to everyone on the ice, as we skate together in perfect 
             union...

[Insert corny SD picture of Hikaru-chan and Mikado skating by in the
background, in wedding garb.]

Mikado: {It seems to be contagious - Azusa isn't the only one affected...} 
        Yes...  Well...

Hikaru-chan: [smiling cutely]  All I have to do is get your permission, and
             Koichi said he would accept it!

Mikado: Eh?!

[Suddenly, the bell for classes rings.]

Mikado: [a barely-hidden nervous tick on his face]  Well, looks like it's time
        for class.  Jya!  

[Mikado rushes off, before Hikaru-chan can get a word in, zooming on down the
halls.] 

Mikado: {Things just get keep getting better and better..}

[Mikado rushes into class, leaping into his seat, just as the teacher is waking
up.  He breathes a sigh of relief.  Until, that is, he notices something on his
desk.]

Mikado: A letter...?

[Indeed it is a letter.  One that reads:
 Sanzenin,
Your latest crimes against Azusa cannot go unpunished.  Today at lunch, you
die.  In front of the school.  Be there.
		 - Ryuuken]
		 
Mikado: [smirking] {A challenge?  I suppose I need to blow off a little steam
        anyways...
	
------------------------------------------------------------------

[Ad break.  A frozen image of Mikado and Ryuuken facing off, with Juyza
watching on.]

[Open to an empty apartment.  It is quite spacious, with at least 4 rooms
branching off from it.  One of the doors opens, obviously to the outside. 
Ryouga, Ukyou, and Mousse all walk in.  They look a bit older - in their
mid-twenties.  Aside from being a bit taller, however, they don't look all that
different.  They're all carrying some boxes.]

Mousse: Man, I didn't think this was ever going to happen.

Ryouga: What, all of us moving out?  After Akane proclaimed her undying love
        for Lin Lin and Ran Ran, it didn't really seem like a good idea to stick 
        around Nerima...

Mousse: Or Kolkhoz...

Ryouga: Yeah..  Where is Mikado anyways?

Ukyou: What we should be doing - looking for a job.

Ryouga: Sure, leaves us with the actual work.

voice: Don't complain.  It's not like you're left to do it yourself...

[All three turn around, to see Shampoo and...  Ranma-chan standing in the
doorway.]

Shampoo: Is good, Shampoo already find job as a waitress!  At a coffee shop
         close by, too!

Rouga:  Heh...  Who would've thought it was gonna be this way?  

Ranma 1/2: 'Friends'
A YRN production
Not coming to a TV near you, ever

------------------------------------------------------------------

[The scene opens to the grounds in front of Kolkhoz High.  Ryuuken is psyching
himself up, practicing some moves on his rollerblades.  Moments later, Juyza
walks onto the grounds.  The pair see each other, and nod.]

Juyza: Doing the right thing, my man.  If you win, you'll be Azusa's partner.
      {And her object of whining..}  [checks his watch]  Just be sure to make
      it quick - I gotta get back to Furinkan..

[Juyza tosses Ryuuken a pair of gloves.]

Juyza: For good luck.

Ryuuken: [feeling the gloves]  These are padded with metal.

Juyza: [shrugs] I -told- you they were for luck...

Ryuuken: [doesn't reply, but puts on the gloves]  Not that I need it.

Juyza: Of course not.

[A crowd is gathering around, looking at Ryuuken, and around to try and find
Mikado, who can't be seen.

Ryuuken: Don't tell me he's going to wimp out...

Mikado: I wouldn't be too worried, Ryuuken..

[Cheers go out, as Mikado walks into the circle of the crowd.]

Mikado:  ...Except perhaps for your health.

Ryuuken: [snarls]  Let's just get on with it!

[Mikado smiles, and pushes himself out to the center of the circle.  He spins
around on his own rollerblades, and limbers up.]

Mikado: Any time you're ready.

[Ryuuken leaps up into the air.  He does a mid-air flip, and begins to spin
around in the air once his feet are aimed in Mikado's direction.  His motion
resembles that of a drill, as he falls down towards Mikado.  Mikado is forced
to leap back from the scene, where Ryuuken has created a small indentation in
the ground.]

Mikado: A fine meneuver Ryuuken, but you need to improve on your aim...

[Both Mikado and Ryuuken rush forward, and begin to skate around each other, 
making quick rushing and dodging moves towards each other.  They circle twice, 
when Mikado leaps up into the air with a snap kick, which also misses it's mark.  
Ryuuken tries to come back with a punch, but Mikado dodges to the side, and 
pushes Ryuuken along his path.  Ryuuken keeps rolling, but manages to stop 
before he reaches the edge of the crowd.  His face is burning.]

Ryuuken: Why you...!  I will not suffer this humiliation!!

Mikado: [smirks] If you didn't want to be humiliated, why'd you challenge me in
        the first place?

[Ryuuken leaps in, with a set of combination punches and kicks, which force
Mikado to fall back.  Ryuuken attempts a sweep kick, which Mikado uses to jump
over Ryuuken.  Mikado lands, and quickly turns around to face his opponent,
who has fallen to his knees.]

Mikado: Poor form, Ryuuken...

[Ryuuken is holding his ears.  He looks dazed, but manages to get to his feet.]

Ryuuken: A modified ear clap?  I should have expected that...

Mikado: Which is why I'm captain, and you're not.

[Ryuuken goes wide-eyed at this, and leaps forward again, fist first.  Mikado,
deciding to try a different tactic, blocks the punch instead of dodging.  He
looks about to make motions to attempt a throw, until he realizes that he's in
pain.]

Mikado: Owww!  [Mikado grabs the hand that had tried to stop Ryuuken's fist.]

[Ryuuken looks down at his gloves, and smiles.  He looks back up to Mikado with
a predatory gaze.]

Ryuuken: Now we'll see who should be captain...

[Mikado has stopped worrying over his fist, just in time to see Ryuuken
approach, and begin spinning...]

Ryuuken: You like your dance of death so much Sanzenin, let's see if you like
         being on the other side!

[Ryuuken is slowly advancing towards Mikado, who looks largely unconcerned.  In
fact, he leaps towards Ryuuken.]

Mikado: [while in the air]  I have to admit... The dance of death has one
        flaw...

[Mikado lands amidst the blows, but his feet touch ground before he's spun
around.  Mikado starts to spin on his own, in the opposite direction as
Ryuuken.]

Ryuuken: What the..?!

[Moments later, both have stopped spinning.  Ryuuken looks incredulous, while
Mikado looks a little amused.]

Ryuuken: {Why did I never think of that?}  

[Before he has time to think anything more, Mikado leaps in with a flying kick,
which Ryuuken leaps away from.]

Mikado: Ryuuken, I wrote the book on these moves.  You think you can beat me at
        them?

Ryuuken:  I will never accept defeat Sanzenin.  Today you die!

[Ryuuken speeds in fast, but doesn't throw any punches.  Mikado dodges calmly
out of the way as Ryuuken passes, and is about to give him another nudge along,
when Ryuuken whips out his hands, grabbing Mikado's own.]

Ryuuken: Maybe you'll like this one then!

Using his momentum, Ryuuken starts to skate around Mikado,  holding tight onto
his hand.  As Ryuuken cycles around, Mikado starts to spin.  Ryuuken picks up
the speed, going around faster and faster.  As he increases speed, he makes
himself the center of motion.  Soon, Mikado is off his feet (well, skates),
holding onto Ryuuken by one arm.]

Ryuuken: How do you like it Mikado?  A singles version of your goodbye whirl!
Although... [They spin around faster and faster.] I have no reason to hold on..

[Ryuuken lets go, and sends Mikado flying.  Mikado crases to the ground, just
at the edge of the crowd.  They all back away, looking worried, but not wanting
to get between him and Ryuuken.]

Ryuuken:  Feh.  Your own confidence is your undoing, Sanzenin!  I am
          victorious!

[Ryuuken is elated, and jumping up and down, revelling in what he thinks is his
victory.  However, Mikado is getting slowly to his feet.]

Ryuuken: I won!  I won!

Juyza: Turn around you dolt!

Ryuuken: I won!

[By this time, Mikado is fully to his feet.  He simply stands there, studying
Ryuuken intently.  He is standing perfectly still, however.  Ryuuken finally
turns around, shocked to see Mikado on his feet.]

Ryuuken: I didn't win?

Mikado: [tilting his head cooly] This is far from over..

Ryuuken: It's your funeral you're asking for Sanzenin...  I give you the chance
         now to give up.

Mikado: [He's bouncing a little, but his eyes seem empty.  They're trained
        directly on Ryuuken] ...give up.

Josie: [from the sidelines]  Uh oh...

Phrank: What's Mikado thinking?  He can't fight after a
        hit like that!

Josie: He's not going to.

Phrank: Huh?

Josie: Just watch.  I've seen this once before...

[Ryuuken raises an eyebrow in curiosity.  Mikado mimics it perfectly, including
body movement.  Ryuuken doesn't notice though, and simply begins to close in on
Mikado.  As they get closer together, Ryuuken circles around to the left, and
then Mikado circles around to the right.  Ryuuken tosses one punch, which
Mikado takes, just as he throws a punch of his own.]

Phrank:  What the...  He's copying all of Ryuuken's moves!

Josie: I believe he calls it the 'reflection' meneuver...

Phrank: But that's crazy!  Ryuuken isn't in nearly as much pain as Mikado! 
        He'll get wasted anyways!

Josie: Wait for it...

[Ryuuken is having fun meanwhile, playing with Mikado.  He lets out a lash, and
a fraction of a second later, Mikado lashes out with the other arm.  After
playing like this for a while, Mikado is doing the same moves as Ryuuken
simultaneously.]

Phrank: He's...  Catching up?

[Josie just smiles.]

[Meanwhile, Ryuuken starts to look desperate, as all of his moves are
connecting against Mikado, but he's getting hit as well.]

Ryuuken & Mikado: [simultaneously]  What are you doing?  ...  Stop that!

[The blows continue.  Mikado looks extremely bruised, but Ryuuken's starting to
stagger as well.  Suddenly, the speed of things shift, and Mikado begins to do
moves before Ryuuken does.]

Josie: [to Phrank] A really brutal kind of hypnotism, isn't it?

[The blows slow down on Ryuuken's part, as his eyes start going blank.  Mikado
looks more and more with it, though.  Soon, Ryuuken has stopped moving
completely.  Mikado takes the time to catch his breath.  He still keeps eye
contact, however.]

Mikado: [strained] Give me your glove.

[Ryuuken takes off a glove, and hands it to Mikado, who accepts it happily.]

Mikado: [putting the glove on.]  Much obliged.

[Mikado leans back, and steps in with a painfully audible punch which connects
with Ryuuken's head.  Ryuuken is knocked out flat.]

Mikado:  That, was satisfying.  

[Mikado smiles weakly, and subsequently collapses.  Fade to black.]

-=-

[Fade to light.  Mikado is laying in bed, in an infirmary.  Slowly, he opens
his eyes.]

Mikado: [scanning around] Where am I..  Ryuuken?

[Indeed, Ryuuken is laying down in another bed, right beside his.  Ryuuken is
sitting up, a bandage wrapped around his head, covering both ears.  He's
staring at Mikado in controlled fury.]

Ryuuken: The medical room.  Where else?  Where the hell did you get that move
         from?

Mikado: I might ask you the same question.

Ryuuken: ...I should have won.

Mikado: But you didn't.  [smiles]  It seems pride was -your- undoing, Ryuuken. 
        Had you not toyed with me so long before attacking, I wouldn't have been 
        able to pull that off...

[Ryuuken sulks quietly.  The silence is quickly broken however, with the
arrival of both Azusa and Hikaru-chan.]

Azusa: I'M Mikado's partner!

Hikaru-chan: No!  It's Mikado's -choice- who his partner is!  And he wants me!

Mikado: {Then again, I could have died and gone to hell...}

[He looks over at Ryuuken desperately, who shrugs.]

Ryuuken: This is your hole, not mine.  

[Ryuuken ducks under the covers, probably falling asleep.  Or maybe just hiding 
the fact that he wants to laugh his head off.]

Azusa: San-channnnn!  You want me as your partner, ne ne ne?

Hikaru-chan: [pushing Azusa out of the way]  Of course not!  He wants to skate
             with his true love!

Azusa: Then why'd he want YOU as his partner?

[Both turn to face Mikado, with pleading puppy dog eyes.  But to no avail. 
He's slipped under the wonderful veil of consciousness again.]

Hikaru-chan: He..  Fainted.

Azusa: You must have frightened him too much!

Hikaru-chan:  Me?  Why I...

[fade to black with their bickering.]

-=-

[Fade in to the Shiratori household.  Juyza is listening to his new albums with
his headphones securely strapped on.  He's burning up the baud on his computer
currently.  Azusa enters the house, closing the door quietly.  Something on
Juyza's computer flashes, and he quickly glances over at Azusa, then back at
his computer.  She looks somewhat relieved, gliding through Juyza's living area
towards the kitchen.]

Azusa: Juyza, I had an exciting day today!  That nasty Hiyama girl told me
       Koichi was going to let her be Mikado's partner, but she was just lying, to steal 
       away my San-chan!  It didn't work though!  [giggles]  San-chan was out for so
       long, I got to Koichi-sama, who cleared everything up!

Juyza: That's nice urchin.

Azusa: Hmh!  Fine, be kawaikune!  [Storms out of the kitchen/living room back
       into the entrance hall.]  ....Ju-chan!

[Juyza falls out of his chair.  Azusa laughs, and sticks her tongue out at
him.]

Azusa: Bidee!  [skates up the ramp to the second floor]  

Juyza: [watches Azusa depart upstairs, and cracks a tiny smile.]  {Well, at least
       she's not moping any more...}

-=-

[Meanwhile, Azusa is prancing along the second floor hall.]

Azusa: Azusa is still Mikado's partner!   ...But is she anything else...

[Azusa walks into her room, scanning her kawaii little friends, looking a
little uncertain now.]

Azusa: He never did answer....

animal voice: Miyaa?

[Azusa looks up, startled.  On her bed, in a spacious cage, is a curious-
looking animal.  It seems to be half-rabbit, and half cat.  It's sitting down,
staring at Azusa.  She squeals in delight.]

Azusa: Kawaii!!!!

[She leaps towards the cage, freeing the little animal from it's cage.]

cabbit: Miya!  Mya!  [Leaps up into Azusa's arms.]

[Azusa laughs, cuddling the cabbit a bit.]

Azusa: But where did you come from, my widdle Lafayette?  Juzya's too much of
       a nasty baka to do this...
       
[She pets the little cabbit, lost in thought for a few moments.  Suddenly, she
brightens up in understanding (or her conception of it, at least).]

Azusa: [sitting down on her bed]  Oh San-chan, you're just shy about it, I
       know..  And now Azusa has proof!

-=-

[Cut to Mikado, still in his bed at the infirmary.  Chance is sitting down
beside him.]

Mikado: So it made it there?

Chance: Signed and sealed.  Amazing what genetics can do these days.

Mikado: I hope it is enough to direct her mind off me..

Chance: Hey, could I steer you wrong?

Mikado: [sparing Chance a doubtful glance] {Why does that not instill me with
much confidence...}
 
------------------------------------------------------------------

(Cut to commercial.  When the show comes back on, the credits roll.
Mikado is roller-blading along a road, images of all the other
characters from the show fading in and out from the image.  Time
passes, and the sky slowly gets darker as he skates along.  As the song
comes to a close, Mikado stops skating, and stares out across a bay,
moon reflecting off the water.  The camera rises up, showing Mikado's
face as a constellation in the stars.)

------------------------------------------------------------------

Mikado Ichiban: Zembun Otoko! 
Episode 12: Love Strikes 

Written by: Eric Jones
Thanks to: Cherryne Edejer (who helped with Mikado's fighting technique)
           Stephan Gagne (who continues to let me use his Juyza character ^_^)

In parts, inspired by the shortfic 'M&Ms', by Jeremy Denton.
You can find this story at http://kafka.uvic.ca/~ejones/fanmik.html, as
well as all of my Mikado Ichiban fanfictions, and other 'Mikado'-type
stories.

This episode has fan art!  Just check out this address:
http://kafka.uvic.ca/~ejones/graphics/azusa.mikado.gif


A note about YRN:   The 'Yeah Right Network' is an attempt to exorcise the
really horrible ideas I have for fanfics sometimes.  I felt that some of the
ideas I came up with were too silly -not- to share with people.  However, I
will NOT be writing any of these any further.  Each episode from now on will
probably have one or two of these..  Unless I'm massively flamed for 
them.  ;)