How 'bout making a couple of these things seem sexy:
dead parrot

Hmm... a challenge ...

Well I'm up to a challenge! (looks at what he's written below, before
he says: ) Please don't flame me!!!


Akane ran her hand across the smooth feathers of the parrot she
was holding. She stared longingly into the glazed over eyes of
the deceased avian. "Oh... dead parrot." she moaned softly. "It's
you that I've always wanted. Not Ranma, he doesn't understand my
needs." she paused, slowly licked her lips, and brought the
glorified featherduster closer to her face. 

"You understand my needs, don't you?" Akane asked the dead parrot
in a husky voice. The parrot chose not to answer, perhaps it too
was overcome by the electric emotions arcing through the room.

"I knew you did..." Akane sighed as she brought her lips to the beak
of her hero, her avian protecter, her dead parrot. The seconds, then
the minutes ticked by as Akane tasted deeply of her bird lover. Then,
she...


Well, enough of that. As it is, that's probably enough to get me 
flamed off the FFML. :)

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Mark Doherty  -  mdoherty@mailbox.uq.edu.au

"If in an infinite universe there are infinite possibilities, 
then somewhere, somewhen, somehow there must exist an humble 
Ranma, an emotionless Soun, a pacifistic Akane and a sane 
Kodachi. But no way, no how is there an Happosai who isn't 
an evil little letch. More's the pity."

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