Cool, A YUA fan fic. I think this is the first I've run across so I gave
this a once over and found that it was pretty much enjoyable. You've set
up some nice stuff here and I enjoyed the way you handled the
relationships with Miyuki and Natsumi. 

There are a couple of problems though, one being (as you've heard from
others) the ending of the fic. I find it very hard to believe that Miyuki
and Natsumi would be back to normal so soon after having Hiro commit
suicide basicaily considiring the nature of the relationship they had. I
would of least expected Natsumi to be upset (as she was going out with
him, and the fact that she and Miyuki would also react differently...). 

I would of also liked a little more done with the Ken/Miyuki relationship
after Hiro showed up. I didn't think it would be smooth sailing in there
relationship after Hiro showed up, and Ken (or Miyuki) would have some
reaction to Hiro and what it would mean to his relationship with Natsumi
(I point to OAV #3 for an example of what a misunderstanding could do to
Ken and Miyuki..). 

But beyond that remains a solid fic that need's a little bit of work, and
I will enjoy reading any future versions of this fic..:)

Ja ne!!

Richard Beaubien
----------------
Mizuno Ami-chan forever!!!

Fanfic homepage http://www.anime.usacomputers.net/~beaubird