NARRABUNDAH 1/2
by Urac Sigma
Volume I, part two
Gakko de, Kimi o Mite Wakaranai
CAST OF CHARACTERS
SIGMATOME RATBAT
A hydrotranssexual
TENDO SUZY
A tomboy
SIGMATOME LEN
A disappointed father
TENDO BOBBI
A bemused mother
KUNOU JARRAH
An overachiever
TENDO NIKI
A gothic materialist
HINOMIYA RUTHIE-SENSEI
A teacher
TENDO FIONA
A good girl
HODJSUKE TIMOTHY
A pet ninja
and a young
LOST BOY
TITLE SEQUENCE.
[With Jajauma ni Sasenai de, and an art card matching the
voice-over.]
SUZY [VO]: Gakko de, Kimi o Mite Wakaranai.
1. OUTSIDE DOJO.
[An establishing-type shot.]
[CAPTION: Neribanda, Japan - Monday 14 August 1995.]
RATBAT [VO]: Doko!? You're sending me where?
2. LIVING ROOM.
[Len and Ratbat-kun are here. Ratbat is aghast, Len
stern.]
LEN: Listen, son - it looks like we're going to be staying here
for some long time. So you'll have to go to school.
RATBAT: Shouldn't you get a job, then?
LEN [Evasive]: That's not the issue. Now, hurry up. Niki and Suzy both go
to this school, and you'll be in the same year as Suzy.
[He holds him out a back-pack.]
LEN: Bobbi managed to find these things around the place for
you, so you may as well be off with the girls now.
[He opens his mouth to protest, but Suzy and Niki come
through, and grab him by a hand apiece, dragging him off.]
NIKI: Come on, Sigmatome!
SUZY: We've got late to not be!
[And they are gone. Bobbi enters and approaches Len.]
BOBBI: That's a good question, Len - why don't you find a job?
LEN: Errr...I've got this back, you see. Ever since the war...
BOBBI: But you weren't in the war.
LEN: Oh, right, yeah - that's because of my back. Sumimasen.
[He jumps through the window/door thing.]
3. FRONT GARDEN.
[Len lands in the pond, as plays at splashing around as a
panda. Bobbi looks on, and rolls her eyes. Len holds up a
wooden sign, saying, 'Not now! I'm busy!']
4. HIGH WALL.
[In Ranma 1/2 [remember that?], most of the road to school
is parallelled by a high wall, and such it is here. Ratbat
tries to walk on top of it for a few steps before falling
off.]
SUZY: Come on, we don't have all day!
[Ratbat looks at his watch.]
RATBAT: Why, when does school start?
SUZY: Nine o'clock.
RATBAT: Aye, kyu-ji. It's only 8:45 now! Narrabundah College,
innit?
NIKI: Hai.
RATBAT: Well, I can see that just there!
[He points, and we see that the college is less than two
hundred metres away.]
NIKI: You don't understand - Suzy has a few...problems in the
morning.
RATBAT: Hontoo ni? What kind of problems?
SUZY: Watch.
[She tosses her bag to him, and he and Niki trail behind
as she increases pace.]
5. BEFORE NARRABUNDAH COLLEGE.
[As Ratbat and Niki watch, Suzy goes forward and is
suddenly set upon by all manner of people, appearing to
want to beat the crap out of her.]
RATBAT: Oi! Suzy-kun, look--
[He starts to move to her aid, but Niki restrains him.]
NIKI: Don't worry, she can handle it. Listen.
[Ratbat does. Now we realise that all of Suzy's assailants
are declaring their love for her.]
RATBAT: Nani?
[As each one comes near her, Suzy plainly turns them down
by defeating their attacks. Ratbat sits awestruck for a
moment until he spies one that Suzy cannot see or hear
coming. Without time to risk her not hearing if he calls
out, he leaps forward and fends them off. Back standing,
Niki buries her face in her hands.]
[Ratbat and Suzy are now in the thick of combat.]
SUZY: Dette-ike! I can do this!
[Knocks one guy out using another.]
RATBAT: Ye nearly missed him, didn't ye?
[Flips an attacker against a tree.]
SUZY: Nerf. Arigato. Happy? Now go away.
[Downs someone with a Flying Noodle KickTM.]
[Ratbat takes another.]
RATBAT: Erm...I dinna think it matters.
[They look around. The ground is littered with fallen
adolescents.]
SUZY: Oh. Well, if nothing else, at least I got finished
quicker...
RATBAT: Would I hate it if I asked what all that was about?
SUZY: Yes.
NIKI: It's something one of the losers from my year came up
with, I'm afraid.
[Flashback to:]
6. QUAD.
[The quad of that fills the middle of Narrabundah College.
Most of the people we just saw after Suzy are here [give
or take a few]. They are paying attention to a speaker we
can't see properly - all we can see if the corner of his
blue samurai robe.]
[CAPTION: Narrabundah College, Neribanda - Monday 10
October 1994.]
SPEAKER: ...and, should any of you wish to date with Tendo Suzy,
you must first beat her in personal combat. So, as
president of the [counting off under breath] ...of all of
the martial-arts clubs of the college, I declare...
[End flashback.]
7. BEFORE NARRABUNDAH COLLEGE.
NIKI: ...and she's had to put up with this every day since.
RATBAT: This is a totemo martial-arts-oriented society, yes?
NIKI: Glad you've noticed...
RATBAT: Anyway, who is this geezer? This president whozahbubba?
[The speaker from the flashback addresses them.]
SPEAKER [OOV]: You could only mean me, little man.
[They whirl around to be faced with a tall individual with
close-cropped hair bearing a wooden sword.]
RATBAT: Aye? And 'oo are you, then?
SPEAKER: You must be struck down for disgracing Suzy - by not
allowing her to fight her own battles.
NIKI [Weary]: Oh, God...
SPEAKER: For this shame you have brought upon the name Tendo Suzy--
RATBAT: Like, is that short for Suzannah, or Susan, or Suzuki, or
Akane, or what?
SUZY: It's all on its own.
RATBAT: Hontoo? I've no heard of that afore. How interesting.
SPEAKER [Determined]: For this shame, you must pay, and boku, Kunou
Jarrah, will see to it that you do!!
[He wields his sword triumphantly, and we have a lovely
heroic pose.]
SUZY: Kuso, Kunou, you're embarrassing...
RATBAT: 'ang about - 'ow come you're out protecting Suzy's virtue?
I'm sure she can do that herself. (I mean, it's not like
she's even got that much to defend...)
[Suzy whips a mallet out of hammerspace and thumps Ratbat
over the head with it.]
SUZY: Ratbat no baka!
JARRAH: I defend her because my heart beats for Suzy and Suzy
alone.
NIKI: Oh? Well, you can get a new job, then. These two are
engaged.
RATBAT & SUZY: NIKI!!
NIKI: Hm? Oh, look. Time for my first class. See you, Suz, see
you, Batti...
[She moves off.]
SUZY: I'm really gonna have to kill her later.
[Suzy and Ratbat make to leave too, but Jarrah holds his
sword before Ratbat.]
JARRAH: And I'm going to have to kill you now...
RATBAT: Sigmatome. Sigmatome Ratbat. And I really dinna have time
for this right now.
JARRAH: Are you daring to turn down my challenge?!
SUZY: Later, guys. Ratbat. We have to go.
RATBAT [Ignoring her]: Och...so that was a challenge, ne?
JARRAH: Hai.
[Ratbat pulls a lighter from his pocket and sets Jarrah's
sword on fire.]
RATBAT: Ye're right. Turned down. Let's go.
[He and Suzy start to walk off. Jarrah looks with fury at
his burning sword, then uses it to swipe Ratbat across the
back with the flat of it. This ends the sword's existence,
but Ratbat is thrown clear out of sight. Suzy traces his
path, and finds Ratbat-chan has impacted on a water
fountain causing her change into her female state.]
SUZY [concern]: Ratti...?
[She tries to look a little more indifferent when she
comes round.]
RATBAT: Hai...
SUZY: I could have told you Kunou would to that. He's got a bit
of a temper...
RATBAT: Grrrr... Sigmatome seiki-o-tsubusu!!!
[She leaps forward as far as Jarrah, and ends her trip by
planting her foot quite firmly into Jarrah's groin. Jarrah
is startled, both by her appearance and her actions. He
falls to the ground.]
RATBAT: Hrm. I wonder if I should have done tha'...
SUZY: Like he ever gets any use out of them.
RATBAT: But what will he think with now?
[They go into the college. Shortly afterwards, a young
girl with red hair and glasses wearing a black sweater and
leather trenchcoat appears. She takes in the broken
fountain, the writhing Jarrah, and clicks her tongue.
Humming to herself, she also enters the building. After
she goes, Jarrah slowly stars to get up. A small figure,
obviously used to domestically serving a Kunou, arrives to
help him. He wears a ninja outfit [and a Fuzzy Bunny
badge], but with the hood down we can see tousled blonde
hair.]
PET NINJA: Oh...are you all right, Kunou-sama?
JARRAH [High voice]: I've had better days, Timothy.
[He shrugs off further attempts of Tim's help.]
JARRAH: Did you see her, Timothy?
TIM: Who?
JARRAH: Why, that vision of loveliness who just tried to make my
balls spring out my ears. The one who...[realises] ...the
one who had to fight for Ratbat. That wimp! That cowardly
cur!
TIM: Sir?
JARRAH: Later I shall vanquish his sorry bat-shaped butt from here
to Graviton City! [Composure] But I must know who that
pon�t�ru no onna is.
TIM: Why the pony-tailed girl?
JARRAH: She's a veritable Venus of beauty, and her spirit burns
like a million stars going supernova.
TIM [VO]: Not bad, considering you only saw her for about two
seconds.
JARRAH: I must know her, Timothy! I must know who she is! Find out
everything you can about her...and then everything you
can't!
TIM: Hai, Kunou-sama. But, sir...what about Tendo Suzy?
JARRAH: As I was overcome by my passion for the red-haired Helen,
I almost lost sight of my undying love of Suzy...what am I
to do...?
[CU on Jarrah. Deep thought. He finally turns to Tim.]
JARRAH: Find out if she swings.
TIM: [Sigh] Hai, Kunou-sama.
8. SUZY & RATBAT'S CLASSROOM.
[A bitching Ratbat takes her place next to Suzy.]
SUZY: Look - I don't care what Niki might have told Jarrah, but
as far as anyone here knows, we just happen to live at the
same house, and we don't even know each other very
well...are you listening?
RATBAT [No]: Can't I just nip off somewhere and find some 'ot water?
SUZY: No - there's a new teacher starting today, so you should
stick around and make a good impression.
RATBAT: But she'll think I'm a girl!
[Suzy pokes Ratbat's chest and it makes the noise.]
SUZY: Dear me...can't imagine why...
[A couple of students by the door return to their seats.]
SUZY: They must be coming.
[All look toward the front of the class. The girl in the
black sweater and coat enters and puts some books down on
the table. There is muttering among the students.]
RATBAT: Nani? She's our sensei?
SUZY: How old is she? Thirteen?!
ANOTHER STUDENT: Maybe she's older than she looks.
ANOTHER STUDENT STILL: What, you mean post-pubescent?
[They fall quiet as the child looks at them with big
eyes.]
SENSEI [Way too cheerful]: HIII, EVERYBODY!!! My name is...Hinomiya
Ruth!!
[She bounces over to the blackboard, and writes, her name hugely and
childishly.]
RUTH: But you can call me...RUTHIE-SENSEI!!!
[She thinks this is so great, bouncing all around the
place. The students just stare wide-eyed.]
RUTHIE: I can see we're all going to get on just famously...! Now,
I'd like to get to know--
[She turns her attention to a noise in the corridor.
Opening the door, she looks out.]
9. CORRIDOR OUTSIDE R & S CLASSROOM.
[Two students are having a scuffle here. Very disruptive.
Ruthie emerges fully into the corridor.]
RUTHIE: Oi! You two! Stop that! I don't like disruptive students!!
[It does sound quite funny, waiting as we are for her
voice to break. The pair don't quite stop fast enough for
her, and she starts to seethe.]
RUTHIE: OK - I warned you!!
[She fishes into her pocket and brings out a five-yen
piece.]
RUTHIE: Happo go-en satsu!
[She draws a ring in the air with the coin, and something
strange happens. All of the aggressive energy seems to be
sucks out of the two students, focussing with a flood of
light on Ruthie-sensei. It rises to a crescendo of light
[you work it out], and when it fades, the students
collapse to the floor, greatly weakened and with smoke
rising from them. Ruth also has changed. She's become
taller, achieved an apparent age of her early thirties,
and her clothes have become, well...revealing.
Particularly now as her shape really gives us something to
reveal. When she speaks, her voice is a lot deeper: no
longer childlike. Very breathy and sexy, in fact.]
RUTH: Didn't I tell you two not to be disruptive?
[A number of her own class, including Suzy, have appeared
at the window that looks into the corridor.]
SUZY: Fuck me...!
[A number of the students gather round her.]
SUZY: [Sigh] It was just an expression.
[They disperse, cursing. Ruth flicks her hair back sexily,
and returns to the classroom.]
10. SUZY & RATBAT'S CLASSROOM.
[Ruth glides back to her position.]
RUTH: Now, children, we've got work to do...
11. KITCHEN.
[Len [still panda], walks in and turns on the hot tap,
filling up the sink. He puts his hands in the water.
Nothing happens.]
LEN: Mnaaaar!
[Fiona sees his plight.]
FIONA: Oh, dear. I'm sorry, Sigmatome-san, but we're having work
done on the plumbing, and the hot water will be off until
this afternoon.
[Len holds up a sign: 'Thank you.']
FIONA: You're welcome.
[She leaves. He gets inspired, then goes to the kettle and
switches it on. After a few seconds, it declares itself
boiled, and he grunts in satisfaction. He pours the
boiling water over his hands and forearms, and returns to
normal. Then he realises that he has boiling water all
over his hands and forearms.]
LEN: AAAAAARRGGGGHHH!
[He runs around the kitchen waving his hands in pain until
he finally spies the full sink, and plunges his hands into
it. Steam floods out, and he sighs with relief. Then he
realises, and looks down at his panda self.]
12. COMMON ROOM.
LEN [VO, off]: MRAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
[It is recess. Suzy and Ratbat-kun enter. Neither appear
to notice the scream, although one or two others around
do.]
SUZY: I tell you, she's scary.
RATBAT: How does she do that? The thing with the coin?
SUZY: Don't tell me you want to learn it?
RATBAT: Och, ye saw it, Suzy-kun...it was like she pulled all of
their--
SUZY: I think you should stick to more traditional martial arts.
Look what happened when you messed around with mystics
last time, my girl.
RATBAT: This is true...ow...
[He rubs his head.]
SUZY: Are you all right?
RATBAT: It's OK...I think I just took a blow in that fight this
morning.
[Ruthie-sensei [as the child] is walking through at that
moment, and hears him.]
RUTHIE: Fight? You were in tatakai?
RATBAT: Ha-hai...sensei...
RUTHIE: That sounds like bad behaviour to me! You need to be
disciplined!
RATBAT: You what? Ye canna--
RUTHIE: Happo go-en satsu!
[She makes the circle in the air.]
RATBAT: 'ere, 'ang about! What's...your...game...
[As all his battle energy is sucked out of him, he trails
off and slumps to the floor. Suzy looks to Ruth, who is
now in her sexy shape.]
RUTH: Oh, don't worry - he'll live. But that'll teach him to be
a naughty boy. And...
[She pulls a slip of paper out of her cleavage. How the
heck it stayed there when she was in her natural state, I
don't know.]
RUTH: When he comes around, give him this...
SUZY: Nerf?
RUTH: A detention slip.
SUZY: Ah.
[Ruth goes, and Suzy first checks to see that not many
people are watching her, then stoops to the unconscious
Ratbat.]
SUZY: Ratti-kun...? Wake up!
[She shakes him. No response. She thinks about slapping,
then decides that she doesn't want to do it while he's
down. Instead, she disappears, returns briefly with a
water bottle, the contents of which she splashes him with.
She splutters awake, at which point Suzy sits up, looks at
the bottle in her hand and remembers.]
SUZY: Oh. Soodesu.
[Ratbat sits up.]
RATBAT: Ye know summat? I really don't think it's my day.
[She takes the bottle and squirts Suzy with it in return.
Suzy retaliates, and pretty soon there's a water fight
going on. Niki comes past and sees them.]
NIKI [self]: Kids.
[Shakes her head and leaves. Then, past our two playful
heroes, we see someone else lurking by the window. Tim. He
writes something in a notebook, then disappears from
sight.]
13. PUB.
[In fact, this looks a lot like an English pub.]
[CAPTION: Interlude:
Carbury, England, UK - Monday 14 August 1995
]
[Oh, right.]
[A figure enters the pub. A bit young to be here, actually
- sixteen years old or thereabouts. Long red hair,
glasses, yellow top, black trousers, GP boots, and grey
fedora with a yellow and black bandanna for a hatband. He
approaches the bar.]
BARTENDER: Can I help you?
LOST BOY: Tendo no dojo wa doko desuka?
[The bartender, who doesn't understand a blind word of
Japanese, shrugs.]
LOST BOY: Watashi wa Neribanda no chiku ni imasuka?
BARTENDER: Sorry, pal. Can't help you.
[The lost boy (like in 'a boy who is lost', rather than like in the
film) growls to himself and stalks out of the pub.]
14. OUTSIDE PUB.
[Disgruntled, the wanderer leaves the pub and starts down
the road. There is thunder, and he looks up. Cut to the
sky, which rain starts coming out of. Cut back to the
road, and our hero is gone, but a little ginger-red pig
with a yellow and black collar is trotting along.]
15. LIVING ROOM.
[Bobbi and Len look up from their scotch and shogi as
Niki, Suzy and Ratbat return. Fiona pokes her head in.]
FIONA: Konnichiwa! How was your first day of school, Ratbat?
RATBAT: Och, no bad...
NIKI: No, he'd already beat up a bunch of people, got Kunou
pissed off with him, and got into shit from the new sensei
before recess was even over!
RATBAT: Thank you, Niki-chan...
LEN: Mrgrrr growf...
[Scowls, then hurriedly arranges a sign. Sign: 'What the
bloody hell am I going to do with you?']
RATBAT: I dunno! Send me back to China, maybe?
[New sign: 'Nice try.']
BOBBI: Ratbat! What kind of husband will you make for Suzy if you
keep getting into trouble all the time?
RATBAT [Sarcasm]: Guh...I just thought she might prefer the rugged type.
SUZY: I prefer the type I choose myself!
[She glares at Ratbat, but Niki grabs her buns (the Chun-Li things on
top of her head, not her buttocks. (Although knowing these two,she probably
does that from time to time as well.) ) and gently
turns her head around so she ends up glaring at Len and
Bobbi instead.]
RATBAT: Niki's right, though. I've got that Kunou geezer after my
blood, and Ruthie-sensei's already put me on detention.
[Fiona comes in, bearing a tray of tea.]
FIONA: Well, your school worries should finish soon.
ALL: Oh?
[Well, Len just grunts questioningly.]
FIONA [Not breaking sweet mode in the slightest]: Yes. At the rate
you're going, you'll be expelled by the end of the week.
[She goes off to study. The others just blink at each
other: Did Fiona just say that?]
16. FRONT ROOM, KUNOU MANOR.
[Jarrah is looking at himself in a full-length mirror.]
JARRAH: Aaahhh...Kunou-sama...it is but a shame that there is only
one of you, and that there can't be one of you for each
and all of the deserving women in the world...
[Flexes his muscles brilliantly, then replies to himself.]
JARRAH [Bimbo voice]: Oh, Kunou, you're just so much man...
[He is about to go for another flex when he sees another
reflection in the mirror. Tim is standing behind him.]
JARRAH [Caught out]: Ah! Tim! I wasn't doing anything, and even if I
had been, you didn't see it, OK?
TIM: Ee, whatever...er, Kunou-sama.
JARRAH: What do you have on pon�t�ru no onna?
TIM: Well, not much so far, I have to confess, sir, though I'm
far from finished. I know that she lives near Narrabundah
College, within walking distance...and I know that she
knows Tendo Suzy.
JARRAH: Ahhh...! Tendo Suzy? Can it be? The two most beautiful
women in the land, waiting together for me... The gods
must be smiling on me.
[Tim isn't so much smiling on him as at him, but controls
himself.]
JARRAH: Did you get my new sword?
TIM: Hai, Kunou-sama.
[He hands him a sword. Jarrah takes it, pleased until he
finds...]
JARRAH: It's rubber.
[He lets it flop about to illustrate his point.]
TIM: Well...yes, sir! Rubber'll last longer! And it won't burn
as easily as that wooden one you used to have!
[He bows and exits. Jarrah lightly thumps himself in the
face with his sword.]
JARRAH: I must kill Sigmatome Ratbat...then I'll see if Timothy
wants to follow him.
[Laughs like a maniac. Dissolve to:]
17. COMMON ROOM.
[Ratbat and Suzy enter, taking a place at a table with
Niki. She doesn't look up from her ledgers.]
RATBAT: ...bet Niki agrees with me, ne?
NIKI: Hm? Agree with what?
SUZY: Ratbat keeps insisting on 'helping' me in the mornings!
NIKI: That's nice of him.
SUZY: But he's cramping my style!
NIKI: That's not nice of him.
RATBAT: I'm not cramping it, I'm enhancing it!
SUZY: Enhancing?
RATBAT: Well, it means ye're gettin' it done quicker. Ye weren't
late this morning, either.
SUZY: OK, that's a plus, true. But I can fight my own battles!
RATBAT: Aye, your totalling of anyone that tries to ask you out.
No wonder ye're still single.
NIKI: She's not single, she's engaged to you.
SUZY & RATBAT: Shut up.
JARRAH [OOV]: Sigmatome Ratbat!!
RATBAT: Och, Glenda, what's he want?
[He turns and stands to find that Jarrah is right behind
him.]
RATBAT: Oh, 'ello.
JARRAH: You fled from our combat yesterday! I challenge you to
face me, one on one!
[He adopts a pose with the sword. Unfortunately, it's not
quite straight. Ratbat looks bemused, then grabs it and
holds it straight.]
RATBAT: Hrm. I've heard that nine out of ten guys have a
flaccidity problem, Kunou-kun. It's nothing to be
embarrassed about, and you can get help.
JARRAH: 'Kunou-kun'?! You will address me, your superior, as
'sempai'!
RATBAT: Aye, whatever, Sempai-kun. Still not interested. Challenge
yerself or whatever it is you honour guys do.
[He turns to sit down, then he realises something. Turns
back.]
RATBAT: No...wait. Fair enough, then, Floppy-san... I'll see you
at four, in the quad. Today.
JARRAH: Good. I suggest you use your time well, Sigmatome. Check
on your medical coverage.
[He departs. Ratbat takes his seat once more.]
SUZY: Did you have to do that? Are you that sure you'll beat him
again? Anyway...
[She sticks her hand in his jacket pocket and pulls out a
slip of paper.]
SUZY: ...that's when you've got that detention with Ruthie-
sensei.
RATBAT: I know what's when.
NIKI [Patronising]: Yes, Suzy. He must be smart. After all, he went
training at Jusenkyou.
RATBAT: Oi! It's Chichi that decided to go there even with no
Chinese skills, not me!
NIKI: No - you just followed him...
[Ratbat slumps his head on the desk and lightly starts
banging it. Pan up to a clock on the wall. It quickly
whirls from 1:15 to 4:00. Pan away again, and the common
room is almost empty. Track right out the window to:]
18. QUAD.
[Empty. Well, almost. Before long, Jarrah leaps down from
somewhere above, screaming a war cry, and making motions
with his sword so fast that it doesn't matter that it's
rubber.]
JARRAH: Sigmatome!!!!
[After a lot of thrusts, he turns a common-looking shrub
into a sculpture of his own head.]
JARRAH: Emerge and face me, Sigmatome Ratbat! I shall fight you to
the finish!
YOUNG VOICE: Fighting?
JARRAH: Uh?
[Cut to show that Ruthie-sensei is also here, waiting for
young Ratbat to turn up.]
RUTHIE: What a naughty, naughty boy! [Pause] Hey, you're not
Ratbat!
JARRAH [VO]: Who is this child? Though it does seem that she will grow
to become quite a woman... Maybe if Suzy or the red-haired
girl have yet to give themselves to me in a few years, she
would be willing to be mine in the meanwhile. [Pause] I'll
get Tim to pencil her in. Wait, what did she say?
JARRAH: You too have been disappointed by that okubyomono
Sigmatome?! Then I will dedicate my vanquishing strike to
you!
RUTHIE: Fighting and name-calling! You need to be taught a lesson!
Happo go-en satsu!
[She starts to draw the ring in the air once more.]
JARRAH: Whose five-yen what? AAAGHHH!
[You know the drill by now. Battle energy drained, taking
most of the rest with it, and Ruth gets bigger. Jarrah
slumps to the ground, and his sword bounces away.]
RUTH: Well...Ratbat's not here, but disciplining you was just as
satisfying. Maybe I'll forgive Sigmatome. It was his first
day, after all. You don't have that excuse.
[She pulls a detention slip from her cleavage and places
it between Jarrah's teeth.]
RUTH: You can clean this place up when you come round.
[Jarrah, naturally enough, doesn't respond. Ruth goes back
inside. Ratbat emerges from hiding, goes up to Jarrah and
taps him on the forehead.]
RATBAT: Tag. You're vanquished.
[Straightens up and looks about.]
RATBAT [Self]: No bad, Sigmatome. Two tori with one ishi.
[Turns to leave, but slips and falls in a puddle. Ratbat-
chan levers herself up, cursing. [The Ranmaverse! Water,
water, everywhere!]]
RATBAT: Och, chikusho...
[The splash from the puddle has also brought Jarrah
around. He groggily opens his eyes, and sees Ratbat.]
JARRAH [Weakly]: Po...pon�t�ru no on..na... suki...da.
[Slumps back. Ratbat looks quite disconcerted. She backs
away slowly, then turns and runs.]
19. QUAD EXIT.
[Ratbat catches up with Suzy and Niki, who have also been
watching the events.]
SUZY [Mildly surprised]: Well - that seemed to work.
RATBAT: Aye. Well, what can I say?
SUZY: Not much, because you'd be pushing your luck.
NIKI: What was that? What did Kunou just say to you?
RATBAT: 'e said, 'Pony-tailed girl - I love you.'
ALL: Chikusho.
[They all shudder.]
END CREDITS.
Sigmatome Ratbat
URAC SIGMA
Tendo Suzy
SUZY STYLES
Tendo Bobbi
ROBYN SCHOLES
Tendo Niki
NIKI O'BRIEN
Ruthie-sensei
RUTH CRABB
Hodjsuke Timothy
TIM HODGE
Lost Boy
EUAN BOWEN
Pat
NOEL COLLINS
written by
URAC SIGMA
additional material
SUZY STYLES
creation and development
URAC SIGMA
EUAN BOWEN
LEILA FETTER
SUZY STYLES
with apologies to
TAKAHASHI RUMIKO
� Recycadelic Cacti MCMXCVI
AUTHOR'S NOTES
..and that was the second episode of Narrabundah 1/2. Following the
reaction to the first episode, I've reduced the amount of Japanese and
tried to place it even more in context(don't worry about that stuff in the
pub, that's supposed to be nigh-incomprehensible). Also, those who have read
or seen the original Ranma 1/2 will notice that this episode starts off less
derivative of the second episode of Ranma, then goes off on its own direction
entirely (For example, Ruthie-sensei's counterpart turned up about a hundred
episodes later in Ranma). This was after a lot of people said that the pilot
was too similar to its source.
I'm trying to build more of a serial thread with this episode, as well.
See if I can't get a coherent sense of continuity going.
Ja ne,
Urac Sigma
Canberra, October 1996