Deep in the Caribbean...

  ...a rowboat glided smoothly through the waves, each stroke carrying its
two passengers closer to the looming mass of the Island of Mêlée.  It had
been a long trip, but the young man being ferried across the waves was
determined.  However, his guide was more aware of went on in these parts, and
had reason to be worried.
  "Ah, sir, you really sure you want to come this far," he asked his young
passenger.
  "Yeah.  Look I told ya, that's where I gotta go," came the standard reply.
  "But sir, these waters are..."  The guide looked around fearfully, as if
afraid of being overheard.
  Impatiently, the dark-haired young man stopped gazing at their destination
to face his companion.  "Spit it out, why doncha."
  "Ah, sir, have you heard of the story of the Ghost Pirate Kuno?"
  Bored, the young man rolled his eyes.  "No.  This some sort of bedtime
story or something?"
  The guide drifted into his age-old patter.  "Ah, very tragic story, sir.
Six months ago, a fearsome pirate named Kuno sail off to search for Secret of
Monkey Island.  But, a big thunderstorm sank his ship, and Kuno and his crew
all drown."
  "Ok, lemme guess.  They're still alive, right?"
  "Ah, customer is not quite right.  Dread Pirate Kuno now Ghost Pirate Kuno.
He sail waters between Mêlée and Monkey Islands in his unholy ship, killing
those he finds."  The guide eyed the young man hopefully.  "Customer want
turn back now, yes?"
  The young traveller shook his head.  "Nope.  I'm not gonna let a stupid
ghost story scare me off.  I'm ready for anything."
  The guide sighed.  He had to admire the boy's courage though.  Not even the
most courageous pirates sailed the seas anymore since Kuno died.  Perhaps
ignorance really was bliss.
  Out of curiousity, the guide caught the pigtailed man's attention.  "Ah,
sir, you not say what you want to go to Mêlée Island for."
  The young man blinked in surprise.  "Oh, I didn't?  Oh well, I suppose it's
no secret."  He fixed the guide with a determined look, before gazing back
at the shores of the Island of Mêlée.
  "My name's Ranma Saotome... and I want to be a pirate."
  
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Coming soon....
     "The Curse of Monkey Island"

P.S.  Don't hold your breath for this.  If someone else wants it,
then sure, go ahead.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------



And now for something completely different....


----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"The Great Anime Fanfiction Bloopers"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Have you ever wondered how fanfiction authors always get
their characters to do exactly what they want?  Simple.  It's
called "editing".  You never see all the scenes that go wrong,
all the impromptu entrances, exits, fumbling of lines, and so
forth.  Until now.

It's all chronicled here, all the times Ryoga completely messed
up a scene by turning up late, turning up early, turning up in
the wrong place, or turning up in a middle of a scene and
challenging Ranma.

All the times Mihoshi completely fumbled her lines and couldn't
locate the cue cards.

All the times Lum inexplicably fried the video equipment meaning
delays of several weeks as new cameras with built-in surge
protectors are brought in.



Okay, any takers?

                                       Terence Fergusson
                                   -- Stranded in an Anime-free College







  --**************--

  


Author's Notes: Well, I liked "Boomers and Youmas" so much, that I thought
I'd send Ian back.  This time though, it's *all* SM.
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Brilliant.  Totally insane, utter nonsense, but
we'll do it because it's brilliant nonsense."
                      - Ford Prefect
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