REVENGE
It was late at night and I was tapping away happily, working on my
story...
I saw a movement reflected in the screen and started to turn towards
it.. there was a faint <phut> and I felt something wet hit the back of
my neck. I collapsed forward and last thing I remembered was my
computer beeping frantically as the keyboard buffer overflowed...
Some are born to consciousness, some achieve consciousness, I had it
thrust upon me in the form of a needle in the arm...
I'd only ever had one hangover, and this was worse... I was lying on
something soft, like a bed or something. I cracked an eye open and
wished I hadn't.
Either I was a few cogs short of a clock, someone had fed me some
hallucinogen or, naaa, couldn't be... that Revenge fic thing Hitomi had
warned me about in that E-mail a while back?
>From left to right there was :
A guy in a tan and black Federation Space Navy uniform with Mobile Suit
Pilot wings, Ensigns insignia and a TFNS Triton shoulder patch He had
haunted grey eyes, black hair and a cold expression. The name patch
read M. Grey..
Four _Very_ familiar hardsuits.
A girl in black bike leathers with yellow accents, black hair, yellow
eyes who's feet didn't touch the ground and who strongly resembled ..
A man with grey and black face paint in matching splinter pattern BDUs
under an Armour jacket and a variety of weapons and tools who was
standing up after injecting me with something. Fenris, wolf totem
shaman and shadowrunner
Last, A woman in a stylish business suit in her mid 30s with long purple
hair, expressionless.
They were all looking down at me, obviously no point in pretending I was
still asleep.
"Let me guess, I'm either cuckoo, hallucinating or in Really Bad
Trouble"
"You're in trouble" said the white hardsuit.
"You put me through Hell" said Mike Grey, the MS pilot.
"You almost killed me " followed Linna, flipping up her visor.
"You had me thinking I was around the twist" growled Priss
Nene piped up "I had fun... hey, stop looking at me like that"
Sylia was silent, unmoving.
Angua, the biker girl just grinned wolfishly, and my mouth went dry...
Fenris rasped "You gave me amnesia, jerked my life around, dumped me
from one universe to another and ... GRRRRR"
Madigan looked down cooly at me "You put me through hell too even if you
haven't done more than sketch out the plot, but I wound up CEO of
Genom..." she smiled faintly. I was not reassured...
"So" I quavered "What do you want anyway..."
"We just want to express our... Appreciation.. for everything you've
done for us." Sylia's voice was cold.
"Hold on a moment... the Knight Sabers, Fenris, Angua and Kate I can
understand, but Grey, you're a Role Playing Game character.. what's your
excuse?"
"Remember that short story you wrote a few months ago? To give the GM a
few more plot hooks? That's enough boyo, your arse is grass and I've got
a lawnmower!"
"Oh... yeah.... Right... Well, I know that even Nene in a Hardsuit can
fold, bend, spindle and mutilate me, and the rest of you... (shudder)..
so, what did you plan?"
Angua finally spoke, her voice smoky "Well, for starters, you can
lighten up a bit, all this thud and blunder melodrama, doom and gloom
and angst..."
"Too fragging right" seconded Fenris
I looked at Angua "Hey, I'm working on it.. aren't you and Miss
Gluttonova having fun?? The Wolf and the Food Monster? The Twin
Terrors of MegaTokyo Ice-cream parlours and Dessert Palaces?"
"MISS GLUTTONOVA? FOOD MONSTER? WHY YOU.."
"Hey, If the shoe fits.." chuckled Priss restraining the enraged redhead
"And what about me?" Grey's voice, reverting to a clipped upper class
Zeon accent, cut through the incoherent shrieks of rage from Nene
"Well, it's not all my fault... Blame Peter, the GM for half of it..."
"That means half is Your responsibility. And you know how I feel about
Responsibility Earther" his eyes were wintery.
I started to get up on one elbow "Look, can I sit up, it's
uncomfortable..."
"No" Linna pushed me back down "we _want_ you feeling uncomfortable
psychologically, just be thankful we haven't stripped you, strapped you
down, blindfolded you and ...
"Hold on, we agreed! No Lemon! He's not Kun-chan. I mean he hasn't
even decided how far you and Fenris have gone yet... oh, you meant..."
Angua trailed off embarrassed
Linna's face suddenly matched the red accents on her hardsuit "What do
you think I am? Some sort of.."
"Round heels? Yoyo Drawers? Hot, Free and Easy?" drawled Madigan
"RRRGGGGGG" from both Fenris and Linna
"ENOUGH" shouted Sylia "Let us keep our focus shall we." She lifted a
bucket.
My tone was disgusted... "Oh No. Not Jusenkyo water, that's been done to
DEATH! I haven't done Anything in the Ranmaverse, unless you count
GRIT. Couldn't you think of something...."
I finally put my brain in gear as I saw the grins... *Ok, we have Sylia
Stingray, scientific genius, Kate Madigan commercial genius, Mike Grey,
equally bright, Fenris who's just plain mean and lots of highly
motivated help from the others, whatever they have come up with, I won't
enjoy it.*
I counted five grins, then the rest of the Hardsuit visors came up and
there were eight...
"You're serious aren't you... Ah guys, can't we talk about it?"...
"HHHEEEELLLLPPPP"
"Oh stop snivelling, it's unbecoming. No one can hear you anyway"
"Angua, this is NOT in my job description! I'm an engineer not a..."
"You, chuckles, are whatever we want you to be."
"Hold on a minute, why are you doing this? I'm sorry about the angst
and so on, but if I didn't like you guys, even you Kate, in a strange
sort of way, I wouldn't bother writing about you. What's our favourite
tag line eh Fenris, Mike?"
"If it was easy, anyone could do it?" they chorused
"But that still doesn't excuse..." Grey continued
"What's to excuse? You're Heroes! Every one of you! If you wanted an
easy life why did you put on the Hardsuits or that uniform? Hell's
Teeth! If you aren't tested in the fires of adversity how would your
true metal be revealed? I've been trying to take you all seriously,
show you some respect! And put a little humor in there too"
"mumble mumble gluttonova mumble mumble food monster mumble mumble"
Kate Madigan sat down next to me and ruffled my hair "Well, you haven't
done much with me yet, but at least it looks like you are making me into
something more than the usual villainess most writers turn me into."
"Thanks, it's nice to get _some_ appreciation."
Linna poked me in the ribs with an armoured finger "Well, _I_ want a
Happy Ending!"
"Hey, there's no such thing as a Happy Ending, either you all get killed
dramatically, or there's a day after, and a group of professional
trouble magnets like you'd get Bored! Besides, I have to leave myself a
few loose ends to maintain continuity with the next one."
"What about My problems Earther! You screwed up at Kham Ran Bay and I
got shot in the leg!"
"Hey, an RPG isn't like a fan-fic, you can't rewind and start over, and
I didn't think fast enough. Anyway, how about You at Seal Rocks,
tripping yourself up and then freezing when the patrol arrived. That
was all your own work! Anyway what have you got to complain about,
you're the best pilot in the Squadron, and from what the GM says, he's
got some interesting plotlines for you... You think Ranma's got
problems with fiancees. HeHeHe"
"What Are You Talking About!" Grey hissed grabbing my shirt and lifting
me up
"Well, in the next little while, you're going to run into Myfanwe,
Aletys and probably a female relative of Senator Takashi, on top of
Rowena... And this is NOT my fault."
He let me drop back down "Maybe I can desert to side 6..." he whispered
"Come on, it's not all bad, you managed to get Cypher a good one dying
him green after the party. He still doesn't know who did it."
"Cypher couldn't find his arse with both hands."
"Don't underestimate him, he's almost as smart as you, and he has
intelligence training."
"And what of Linna and I, O Author? " Fenris now claimed my attention
"Yeah, leaving us up in the air because you're too timid to define our
relationship!"
"Well, what do _You_ want?
"Well, ahh, um..."
"You see my problem? Don't worry, it'll get there. Just have a little
patience."
Sylia spoke "Well, be that as it may Barry, aside from confusing me
horribly for a while, I have nothing _personal_ against you, but the
risks you are taking with the world I live in... "
"What am I supposed to do? Let you walk all over the opposition? It
all has it's own internal logic, once Genom knows about magic, the rest
is on railroad tracks."
"Well, I like it" smiled Kate, allowing a little mage-fire to gather on
her palm. "It's opened up whole new worlds to conquer."
Sylia turned to the executive "This is supposed to making me feel
better about these stories? Megamisama! The situation is unstable
enough as it is without adding magic to the mix!"
"Seriously Sylia, I think we are going to have to have a little talk
when we get back. Lets just say, I've had a few insights recently."
"What? A kinder, gentler GENOM? Don't make me laugh" snorted Priss
contemptuously.
Sylia interrupted "I can see we cannot even agree on what we are trying
to accomplish here. Before we take any precipitate action we Must
decide what our goals are.."
They all began talking at once..
"Less angst"
"True Love"
"More fight scenes"
"A Lot less Angst"
"Lighten up"
"More Ice-cream"
"NENE!"
"Well, I can see this will take some time" shrugged Sylia, Madigan
nodded in agreement.
"Don't mind me" I said, getting up "Take all the time you want"
Fenris blurred around the bed to intercept me "Not so fast chummer,
you're not going ANYWHERE so stay frosty. We haven't forgotten you.
Not by a _long_ shot."
It was one thing to write about enhanced reflexes, but another thing to
see them in action. Scarey.
Kate spoke over the hubbub "I suggest we discuss this further
elsewhere. It's not like he's going anywhere." She looked at Sylia who
nodded to Fenris.
He pulled an air-hypo out and before I could react, injected me...
*Why'd I have to make him so damn fast...* I thought as the darkness
reached up to claim me....
The sound of the keyboard buffer overflowing woke me up... I'd fallen
asleep writing, and had had the weirdest dream... Hey, there was a new
icon on the desktop... Read Me Now... I opened it.
Hi Barry, this is the 'Food Monster'.
I've installed a new TSR on your machine.
Don't try to wipe it, I wrote it myself.
It will feed us what you've written every time you
surf the Net. If you don't pull your socks up and
write nice, we'll come back and do nasty horrible
things to you.
Sylia says that the unknown is a far greater threat
than the known... lets your imagination do the work
for us. I think she's got a point. Don't you?
Well anyway, we'll be seeing you around.
Love and kisses
Nene Romanova
PS : Angua and I won't let them do anything _too_
nasty to you, us redhead computer geeks have to stick
together
The file then wiped itself and I couldn't recover it... but since then,
there has been a lot more modem activity than I can account for...
Maybe I'd better let someone know...
Naaaa just a bad dream.
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR....
Well, weeks passed, I continued typing away in spurts of creativity...
Of course they came back.
When I get things in order, I'll post it.. it surprised everyone.
Right now.. no it would only let _Them_ know.
I have just seen an interesting message on the net... that insane A.I.
Alpha Centauri is looking for help... something about some being, <?>,
inspiring the animates to take revenge on their authors...
Revenge is a two way street.
I think I'll answer.
--
Barry Cadwgan (
BCADWGAN@FL.NET.AU )
"The end does not justify the means.
The end is the sum of the means,
as the road travelled determines the destination."
Valijon Starbringer (Hellflower Trilogy, Eluki bes Shahar)