Authors: Gary Kleppe, Jim Nutley, and "Numbski" Shadwick.

Kuno:  We're being buried alive in spam.

Jim:  My dear Kuno, is this so different a fate as the FFML itself?

Kuno: Was that a ki-based attack?

Gary: No, a key-based attack. You know, the little key that you use to
open the can...

Kuno:  That foul daemon!  We must smite thee, Mailer-Daemon!

(The three hear a noise coming from outside their buriment.  After
they had listened closely, they could finally make out was being
said.)

Numbski:  MMMMM.......spam.......

(The four wandered along for many long hours, composing senseless
fanfic dialog unworthy of documentation.  Out of nowhere the three
encountered what appeared to be an exit ramp.  There was a sign that
said:

YOU ARE NOW LEAVING THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY)

Jim:  Look!  Hence is the FFML!  We've made it.

Numbski:  Uh, Jimbo?

Jim:  What is it fair Numbskull?

Kuno:  It lies off the Information Superhighway.

Gary:  Now what shall be done about FFML, tis the end of our
merriment?

Kuno:  Ne, cannot be!  We must rescue it!

(The four argue about what should be done while the FFML is off the
internet, not noticing that in the background, two figures are
fighting.)

Mailer-Daemon:  Ah, I must resupply myself with spam!  The usual
morons aren't submitting anymore now that the blasted FFML is down!

(Editorial note: This took place last month when the FFML was down.)

P-chan:  BWEE!

Daemon:  I must have pork!  It is the prime ingredient in my luncheon
mayhem!

P-chan:  BWEE!

Daemon:  Don't you ever say anything else?

P-chan:  Screw you!

Daemon:  Huh?

P-chan:  I'm sick and tired of the sweet and innocent act you moron!
No one ever said I couldn't become homicidal!  Shichihahoudan!

(And thus, the Mailer Daemon was destroyed.  However, P-chan wasn't
made to handle such a blast.  So, the four merry fanfic authors had
roast pork for lunch, and all was well.  Spam would continue to flow
freely through the land. )

Gary: Um, I hate to contradict an omniscient narrator, but this one
little pig ain't gonna feed the 200 or so FFML people.

(I thought we'd use it to make Spam. Have you any idea how little meat
they put in that stuff?)

Gary: OK, but even so...

Jim: There is only one answer. We must track down a new source of
Spam. Knights, let us ride to Spamalot!

(Music starts, then abruptly dies)

Jim: On second thought, let's not go to Spamalot. It is a silly place.

Gary: I think I already used that line. What do we do now?

Numbski: Wait for a vision from the Lord.

Gary, Jim: Oh, yeah.

(More to come...)

Posted by:
Gary Kleppe
kleppe@execpc.com, Home page http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe
My fanfics and the FFML map are on my comics/manga page,
       http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics