Neko-phobia
Part One: Akane-san Wa Neko-chan Da Yo
by David Eddy <dje@progress.com>
Author's Notes:
This is the first draft of part one of a series of at least four
parts with the working title of "Neko-phobia". The title of
this part translates loosely as "Akane is a cat!" (Its actual
meaning is not quite this but that's Japanese for you.)
The original idea for this story came from a "fanfic ideas" post by
Korhonen Kai Petteri (kkorhone@server.finhost.fi) in which he said
(in part):
What if Shampoo succeeded somehow moving her curse to Akane? (OK, I
got the idea from Joseph Palmer's 'Ninja no Himitsu', sue me.) How
would Ranma react to this, could he start to get more control over
his cat-phobia (he does, after all, in certain way care of Akane),
how would Akane react of seeing Ranma trying to control his phobia?
Shampoo would probably think that this would get Ranma to her.
I may as well stick with tradition and say, "This is my first fanfic."
C&C is welcome. I think the major issues will be in characterisation.
(This does not necessarily mean that I will automatically fix any
characterisation issues.) Spelling and grammar weenies, the spelling
used is *Commonwealth* English so please don't gig me for "colour",
"honour", "centred", and numerous "s" <--> "z" replacements.
And now, on with the show!
==cut here======================================================
"Ranma, would you like a cookie?" Akane's voice was nervous as
she stood, holding a plate of cookies in the shade of the large
tree by the dojo.
Ranma was working out, doing katas and conditioning exercises in
the humid heat of early afternoon. He was wearing only his
ubiquitous Chinese black pants; his torso was covered in a film of
sweat. He turned to face Akane and looked suspiciously at the
plate held in Akane's hands. She had arranged a number cookies on
it in a pleasing pattern. He leaned over to examine them closely.
The cookies looked normal enough: The star shapes produced by a
cookie cutter were clean and precise; the cookies were a pleasant
golden-brown; and the texture looked okay. They smelled nice, too.
But... experience was a hard teacher.
"Did Kasumi cook these?"
Akane shook her head. "I... I cooked them especially for you,
Ranma." She smiled winningly. "Don't they look nice?"
"You cooked them?" Ranma looked at her accusingly. "Are you
trying to poison me?!"
"What do you mean?! They're perfectly alright!" Akane's
expression became angry. "You stand there and accuse me of
attempting to poison you and you haven't even tried one yet?!" She
dropped the plate and pulled a mallet from nowhere and cocked it in
both hands over her head.
"Eh? Why shouldn't I? You can't cook at all! Unfeminine!"
Akane was now emitting a blue aura; her eyes were ablaze. "Ranma
no..." The mallet descended quickly, Akane's final word becoming a
kiai-yell. "...BAKA!!"
Ranma managed to dodge the hammer blow, but he felt it tingle as
it whistled past his body and noted a momentary glow about the
hammer out of the corner of his eye as he jumped out of danger.
Akane chased after Ranma, the mallet again cocked over her head.
Ranma backpedalled into the pond, his normally-excellent
coordination deserting him, his expression shocked. He quickly
disappeared under the water. Akane ran to the edge of the pond and
waited for Ranma to emerge.
Kasumi stepped onto the porch and called to the waiting Akane.
"Akane, would you please do a little shopping for me? I need some
things for dinner."
Akane looked over at Kasumi, then down at the pond. After a
moment she released her grip on the mallet and dropped her hands to
her sides, her shoulders slumped forward and her head hung in a
pose of dejection. "H-hai, oneechan." With a last venomous glare
at the pond she walked into the house. "Baka!"
* * *
Soun and Genma sat on the porch playing shogi, the occasional
clack of the tiles barely heard over the singing of the cicadas.
All the shoji in the house were wide open to catch any passing
breeze. An electric fan hummed to itself, trying to move the
still, humid air about. Nabiki sat near the fan, reading a manga.
Ranma sat comfortably on the porch facing the pond, brooding.
Kasumi stepped out of kitchen, wearing an apron, looking slightly
concerned. "Ranma, has Akane returned yet?"
"Eh? No."
"I sent her shopping over two hours ago and she should have
returned well before now."
"She'll be okay."
"I'd appreciate it if you'd try and find her, Ranma."
"But..."
Soun looked up from the shogi board. "Yes, Ranma, go look for
Akane. It would be terrible if anything had happened to her."
"But I.... Hai." Ranma uncurled from his seated position and
ran out the gate.
* * *
Half an hour later, Ranma was running in a ground-eating lope
back towards the dojo. `How bizarre,' he mused to himself. `The
shopkeepers remember seeing her, and I found where she did the
shopping for Kasumi, but that was hours ago.' He turned a corner,
his eyes quartering the surroundings, his every sense on alert.
`She wasn't at the park, nor under the bridge, nor was she in any
of the other places she likes to go. She wasn't even at school.'
Ranma turned another corner, and saw Akane lying by the dojo gates.
For a moment it seemed as though his heart had stopped.
"AKANE!!" Ranma sprinted to where Akane lay. He knelt by her
and lifted her head. "Akane!!"
The dojo gates slammed open as Kasumi, Soun, Nabiki, and finally
Genma came running at his cry. "Akane!" repeated Ranma, shaking
her gently, his face filled with concern.
Akane's eyes flickered, then opened slowly. "R... Ranma? What's
wrong?"
"Are you alright, Akane?" asked Kasumi, kneeling by Akane
opposite Ranma.
"I... I don't know." She sat up slowly. "I feel fine. Why are
we in the street?"
"Let's go inside," said Nabiki.
Ranma stood easily and offered a hand to Akane to help her up.
Akane ignored it and stood up under her own power. Kasumi grabbed
Akane's shopping basket and also stood.
Ranma, the last one through the gates, slammed them closed with a
crash.
In the living room, Kasumi served tea. "Akane, what happened
after I sent you shopping?"
Akane frowned and at length finally shook her head. "I can't
remember. I bought the things you wanted and had started home.
Then... Ranma was shaking me."
"You don't remember anything?" asked Nabiki.
"No. But I don't know what you're all so worried about. I feel
fine."
"I think you should visit the doctor, Akane," said Kasumi.
"I don't think that's necessary, oneechan."
Soun looked sternly at Akane for a moment, then delivered his
judgement. "If you don't think it's necessary, Akane, then don't
go. But I want you to promise me you'll go immediately if you
begin to feel odd."
"Of course, otousan. Thank you." She looked at the wall clock,
then turned to Ranma. "Ranma, isn't it time for our sparring
session?"
Ranma grunted. "Do you feel up to it, Akane?"
"I've just said I feel fine!"
He shrugged. "Whatever. Meet me in the dojo in five minutes."
* * *
The lowering sun lit the undersides of the gathering clouds
brilliant crimson. Ranma sat on the rocks by the pond, relaxing
from the sparring session with Akane and contemplating the beauty
of the sunset. A small corner of him, which only surfaced when he
meditated in this way, wished that Akane was here with him sharing
the sunset. But Akane had gone inside, offended in some way by the
different course the sparring had taken.
The sparring had been unusual. Instead of merely defending as
usual, Ranma had taken an active role, spending most of his time
attacking, feeling out Akane's defences in detail. He had pushed,
and pushed... but finding the right level was difficult; if he
attacked too hard Akane had no chance to block his blows and that
wasn't the objective at all...
A bicycle bell dinged. "Nihao!" Ranma looked up to see Shampoo
on her bike, descending from a jump over the garden wall. She was
dressed for the heat in a short dress of Chinese pattern and shoes;
on the back of the bike was a soup carrier. She was headed for a
collision with his head.
Ranma leaned out of the way of Shampoo's trajectory. She missed
him and landed in the pool instead. He tensed himself to run from
the cat that would soon emerge from the pool but was distracted
momentarily by the change sweeping through him as the splash of
Shampoo's landing hurled water over him.
The water cleared from Ranma's eyes and her first sight was of
Shampoo, the silk dress clinging wetly to her delectable curves,
standing in the pond with the soup carrier in one hand. She was
smiling.
She wasn't a cat.
A synapse spat in Ranma's brain. Shampoo had been cured.
"Shampoo!" Ranma jumped off the rock into the pool next to
Shampoo, her red braid dripping water, and grabbed her by the
shoulders. "You're cured! Tell me how you did it!"
Shogi pieces went flying as Genma leaped from the porch straight
into the pond. Now a panda, Genma attempted to grab Shampoo as
well. She twisted out of Ranma's hands to avoid the panda's grip.
Ranma tackled Shampoo, submerging both of them in the pond. They
popped up, Shampoo hugging Ranma to her chest, Ranma with big eyes
trying to get away form her. Genma materialised a sign saying,
"Tell us!" and used it to lambaste Shampoo, usually hitting Ranma
instead. Finally Ranma squeezed out of Shampoo's grip and clocked
Genma behind his round furry ears. "Stop it, oyaji!"
Shampoo was standing in the pond, looking angrily at the soup
container which was bobbing in the pond. "Husband waste the ramen
Shampoo cooked for him!"
"You're cured, Shampoo!" said Ranma intelligently.
Shampoo spared Ranma a look of contempt. "Aiya. Of course
Shampoo is cured. Is Shampoo a cat?"
"How did you do it? Tell me!" Genma held up his sign and knelt
down in a pose of supplication.
"That not matter." Shampoo glomped onto Ranma again. She spoke
in a seductive voice. "Now Shampoo is a whole woman again, Ranma
can marry Shampoo. When do we get married, husband?"
On the porch, Soun was kneeling by the upside-down shogi table.
Beside him stood Akane, Kasumi, and Nabiki. All had been watching
the unfolding scene with fascination. As Shampoo embraced Ranma,
Akane could finally stand no more. Her aura flamed. She ran over
to the pond, hoisting the top of the bird feeder on the way, and
tossed it at Ranma and Shampoo. It hit Ranma on the head, again
submerging her. Shampoo glared at Akane.
"This time, stay down there!" yelled Akane before spinning and
stalking back into the house. "I'm taking a bath!" she said to
Kasumi as she went past her.
Shampoo left and Ranma staggered out of the pond carrying the
huge stone bird-feeder. She plonked it back onto its stand and sat
down on the porch and started to wring her hair out before removing
her shirt.
The return to what passed for normality in the Tendo household
was shattered when the scream of a lost soul rang out from the
depths of the house. It went on and on... then stopped abruptly.
"Akane!" shouted Kasumi. She sprinted for the bathroom, for once
ahead of Ranma who followed her closely. Nabiki grabbed Ranma's
arm as she went by.
"Let Kasumi deal with it," she said to Ranma. "And cover those
up before otousan has a heart attack." She whipped out a camera
and took a quick photo before running down the hallway to the
bathroom.
Ranma wandered into the kitchen and changed herself back to male
form. He walked back into the living room, a towel draped about
his neck, and knelt down at the table. He looked nervous, sitting
in sieza which was unusual for him.
For a time, the only sounds which could be heard were the
enthusiastic singing of the cicadas, the clack of shogi tiles, and
occasional sobs coming from the bathroom. At length the bathroom
door opened and the three Tendo girls emerged, Akane in a bathrobe
with her hair damp. Ranma watched closely as the three girls came
in. Kasumi's expression was grave. Akane looked as though her
world had ended. Ranma found Nabiki's expression more than a
little odd... she was boiling mad, absolutely furious in a quiet
way. He had never seen her like this before, and he found himself
wondering if Nabiki was capable of killing.
Kasumi went into the kitchen while Nabiki guided Akane to her
usual seat at the table. Ranma covered his continued observation
by changing into his normal, comfortable seated posture. Nabiki
went into the kitchen briefly, and reappeared with the large kettle
that was kept hot for tea and Ranma. Kasumi followed with a tray
which she set on the table. Tea things were on it, plus a tumbler
of cold water. A thrill went up Ranma's spine. Could it be...
"Otousan... otaasan," said Kasumi calmly. "We have tea."
Soun and Genma came over to the table and sat. Soun accepted a
cup of tea and drank. He waited until the others had been served
before asking the only possible question.
"Kasumi... what has happened?"
"Otousan, it would be best to demonstrate. Akane, please forgive
me."
Akane looked up briefly with haunted eyes before closing them and
nodding. Ranma's spine chilled anew as Kasumi took the untouched
tumbler of cold water and moved towards Akane. She up-ended the
tumbler over Akane's head.
The bathrobe fell loosely to the floor. A lump under it stirred
briefly. Ranma leaned over to get a closer look. A white paw
reached out and pushed the robe aside.
Akane had become a cute little cat.
"Waaaa!" cried Ranma as he backpedalled inelegantly across the
porch and yard to plaster himself flat against the wall of the
dojo.
Soun lay on the tatami mats, crying, his daughters clustered
about him. It was a scene very similar to that when Ranma and
Genma first arrived... except that Akane too was crying and Nabiki
was utterly furious. Kasumi took refuge in making fresh tea for
everybody, her expression calm. Somehow the simple operations of
making tea helped her find her wa and by the time she has finished,
she was once again centred.
"Please, otousan, drink some tea. Everything will be alright."
Tears streamed down Soun's face, but he sat up from his prone
position and accepted a cup of tea from Kasumi. "How can it be?"
he asked in a broken voice.
There was a pregnant pause. Finally, Ranma spoke. "She must
have been cursed with Jyusenkyo water," he said.
"Has... the master been about?" asked Soun.
Ranma shook his head.
"He's still at that gymnastics competition in Kobe," spat Nabiki
contemptuously. "Besides, I don't think Akane was cursed with
water from Jyusenkyo."
Everyone at the table stared at her.
"Look at the facts," she continued. "Shampoo is no longer cursed
and refuses to say how it was done. Akane is now cursed and her
cursed form somehow looks very similar to that which Shampoo used
to have." Nabiki looked around, her eyes laser beams. "It must
have been Shampoo or that demon grandmother of hers," she said.
"They must have somehow transferred Shampoo's curse to Akane.
Remember, Akane disappeared this afternoon and cannot remember what
happened during that time."
Ranma's eyes blazed at this. He looked at Akane for a long
moment then got up and bounced out of the compound in the direction
of the Nekohanten without saying a word. Akane stared after him,
her eyes first big in amazement and disbelief then narrowed in
anger.
"Why that... unfaithful, inconsiderate, transvestite, perverted
BAKA! I guess he just showed his true colours! He's gone off to
cuddle that Chinese strumpet Shampoo. Now that she's no longer
cursed he can't wait to go to her!" Akane shifted position, ready
to leap up and run after Ranma with intent to perform grievous
bodily harm.
Kasumi placed her hand on Akane's shoulder. She looked a little
nervous. "Akane, please wait. I think that all may not be as it
seems."
Akane relaxed a little under her big sister's influence. "What
do you mean, oneechan?"
"Remember when Shampoo first came, Akane. Ranma never encouraged
her, not really."
"But I'm a cat! He hates cats!"
"I think you should be patient and watch what happens. You may
be surprised."
"I agree."
Akane glanced over at Nabiki, and stared. Nabiki was smiling
nastily. "What?"
"I agree. I think Ranma's gone to tell Shampoo exactly what he
thinks of her, Akane." Her smile twisted into an expression of
mock concern. "I *do* hope she survives the experience."
* * *
Ranma landed outside the Nekohanten. Oddly, it wasn't open for
business. Only a few lights were on inside. A sign on the door
said, "Closed due to unforseen circumstances. We apologise for any
inconvenience. Please come back again." Ranma ignored this and
flung the door open and ran inside.
"Nihao, Ranma! Husband want ramen?"
Ranma quickly scanned the interior of the restaurant, his senses
extended fully. What he saw added fuel to his fury.
The tables and chairs had been stacked against the walls, leaving
the bulk of the floor-space empty. A large tub sat in the middle
of the floor with three braziers spaced about it. Some ribbons
still hung from the ceiling but there were many more and some
other, unidentifiable things in a pile near where Shampoo stood,
posing seductively with her broom.
It looked like the site of a ritual.
Ranma glared at Shampoo, holding himself back from attacking her.
An ugly part of him which wanted to unleash his full fury on her
was straining to be released, yanking at the restraints of
morality, honour, and intelligence. He held it back firmly,
knowing that a ritual of this nature was almost certainly beyond
Shampoo... and besides, bloody scraps of meat don't answer
questions.
Ranma stared at Shampoo for a long moment, bringing his temper
under control. Finally he spoke.
"Why?" he ground out. "Why did you do it, Shampoo?"
Shampoo tried to look confused but didn't quite succeed. "What
do you mean, husband?"
The demon inside Ranma surged against its restraints. "WHY DID
YOU TRANSFER YOUR CURSE TO AKANE?!!"
"But... but... Shampoo not know what Ranma is talking about."
Ranma sawed back on his demon, bringing it under control again,
but his eyes blazed. "Shampoo... normally I don't like to hit
girls... but I think in this case..."
"You think in this case what, son-in-law?" asked Cologne from
behind Ranma. She moved so that she was next to Shampoo.
The demon surged again inside Ranma, and this time broke free.
"Kuso Baba, this is all your fault!" he yelled, launching himself
towards the pair.
Cologne found herself fighting for her life. She had never
before experienced Ranma fighting with all his power and passion,
and she was shocked at how easily he had dispatched Shampoo despite
also being fully engaged against her. She found herself analysing
his moves, admiring how he brought the speed of the Tenshin
Amiguriken attack to all his movements while at the same time
maintaining a stunning power in his attacks. She was growing
desperate, for she could not hold him off much longer.
Ranma was growing impatient. As usual, the old ghoul was holding
him off and getting in some blows of her own, and he needed to
finish her off before she got a crippling blow in on him. He
summoned his ki, amazed at how easily it came. He felt light-
headed with power, and began the dragon's spiral.
Cologne saw what he was doing and blanched. "No!" she cried.
"HIRYU SHOUTEN HA!"
"Look!" cried Kasumi, wonder in her voice. "How beautiful."
Everyone followed her pointing arm. Even Akane looked up, yanked
out of her black study by the beauty of the display. A red-orange
glow was just fading from the low clouds, tendrils floating down,
fading rapidly but pulsing with terrible power. Soon the display
ended.
"I don't think that was a firework shell," said Genma.
Nabiki noted the direction from which the display had come. She
smiled slightly to herself. "Yes, how beautiful."
Kasumi looked at Nabiki, a slight expression of concern on her
face. Akane stared off into the distance, thinking about what she
had just seen. Could it be?
Thunder rumbled. Soun, Kasumi and Nabiki looked at Genma
accusingly. He held his hand over his stomach guiltily.
Kasumi laughed lightly. "Perhaps I'd better prepare dinner."
* * *
The sensation of the change surging through him awoke Ranma with
a jerk. He sat up and almost immediately regretted it. Aches and
twinges were all over his body, but he felt no major pain.
He was sitting in the ruins of the Nekohanten. It was raining.
Nearby lay Cologne and Shampoo. They looked battered but not
bloody, he was relieved to see.
Ranma stood and exhaustion assailed him. His legs felt weak, but
he tottered across to the others and checked for a pulse on each.
They were alive. He was glad; he would not have wanted to have
been responsible for their deaths. The thought of what had been
done to Akane caused anger to surge through him, but he had no
trouble beating it down with a proverb: "When setting out on
revenge, first dig two graves."
He turned, and tiredly set out for home. Sirens began to sound
in the distance.
Ranma felt vaguely surprised to see the lights of the Tendo home
shining over the garden wall. The rain had stopped. Too tired for
emotion, she pushed open the wetly-glistening gate and walked
unsteadily in.
To be almost knocked off her feet by Akane, who was crushing her
ribs in a boa-constrictor grip. Ranma went red in the face.
"A-Akane! I can't breathe!"
Akane released Ranma, who leaned forward and blew a little.
"Ranma, are you alright?" asked Kasumi.
"We were worried about you!" accused Akane.
She nodded. "I'm just tired."
"Would you like some dinner? I saved some for you."
Genma turned and ran for the kitchen. Ranma watched this and
shook her head. "I just want to sleep."
"Did you get her?" asked Nabiki.
Ranma looked at Nabiki, her expression slightly sad. "I
confronted Shampoo and Cologne. We fought." Ranma shook her head.
"I don't think I want to pursue them any further. There's no point
in revenge."
"But they should be punished."
"Then do it yourself, Nabiki. I'm not a ronin for you to hire."
Ranma looked at the ground. "I want to go to bed." He looked at
Akane. "Akane, I... Gomen. Hai, gomen." Her voice broke a
little on the last word as she stepped around the others and walked
into the house and trudged tiredly up the stairs.
==cut here======================================================
--
David Eddy Senior Consultant dje@progress.com
Progress Software Pty Ltd. +61 3 9885 0544
*** Visit our web site at http://www.progress.com ***