On Wed, 25 Dec 1996 08:58:45 -0800, Henry J. Cobb <hcobb@slip.net>
wrote:

[Ranma/AMS] "Under The Hammer" (3/3)

"Nooooo...!"  The cry cut through Akane sharper than any knife or
banshee's wail.  It was the scream of a woman who had lost her beloved
forever.  She knew it well.

Was that my scream?,  She thought, did I have the nightmare again
tonight?

Akane rolled over on her futon to face the door, as she heard footsteps
running down the hall of the temple.  It's Ranma, she thought, he's
coming to hold me again and make it all better.

I like this part, it gives us some insight into what's going on in
Akane's mind these days.

They all gathered around the living room table.  Ranma with his arm
around that other woman.  Akane and P-chan across from them.

"Akane Tendo," Ranma announced, "this is my fiancee, Skuld, goddess of
the future."

Oh yeah. I remember that spamfic. "He wants Skuld. Definitely."

"Skuld's dreams are very special."  Ranma assisted Skuld to her feet.
"Let's sleep it off then work it out in the morning."

As Ranma lead Skuld off with him, Akane protested. "Hey!"

led

Skuld, looked up at Ranma, with a sly grin.  "Can I trust you to behave
yourself?"

Who said this, Skuld or Akane? I would think Akane.

"Skuld has her own room here."  Ranma looked at the two women.  "I can
get it ready in just a few minutes."  Ranma turned to Skuld.  "Then
darling, you can try the dream again.  And this time hold onto it, while
I jump in to help you track it."

Huh huh... he's gonna jump in her...

Skuld's flinch was a tiny, petty, guilty victory for Akane.

Heh.

"You're so close Darling, if only you could foresee the sequence of
events in enough detail to prevent the act...  It would prove that your
vision isn't just some parlor trick.  You'd get that class-one licence

license

"Please don't bother."  Ranma cut in.  "I've found somebody else, my
involvement here is purely professional."

I like the way Ranma is portrayed in this. Being dead has made him
detached.

Akane wished he hadn't said that so flatly.

"And who is this goddess that's so much better than my sister?"

Nabiki doesn't know how right she is.

"A mirror clone?"  Nabiki ventured.

"No, they don't shift forms."  Akane replied.

"You dunked Ryoga in the spring of drowned Ranma?"

"There is no Ranmaniichuan.  If there was, it would give only one of
his/her forms and only when mixed with water, and I haven't seen Ryoga
since that incident four years ago."

This discussion seems a little long and pedantic, especially
considering that we readers already know the answer.

"Which one?  Tatewaki, Ukyou or Kodachi?  I'd let this one be sis.

be, sis. (Unless she wants to let this one be her sister.)

"I won't fall prey to the madness that consumed your sister.  I cannot
reverse the fact of my own death.  I will never be a father, until I'm
recycled.  Spirits and mortals simply don't mix.  What Akane needs is
someone who loves her and can stay with her to be her husband and the
father of her children.  I have a candidate, but he must remain hidden
for now. 

Oink oink!

"I could never hate you Akane."  Ryouga whispered back.  "I love you.
Before I loose my courage again ---  If we survive this, will you marry

lose ("loose my courage" means basically the opposite!)

<<Then how could he transform, by just thinking about it?>>

{{The Jusenkyou curses are a form of Ki, like your hammer.  That's why
we each got the curse that matched us.  I've been teaching Ryouga how to
control his transformation.}}

ARRG! You beat me to using this idea! But a little foreshadowing would
have been nice on this; as is, Ryouga's control of his transformation
comes out of nowhere. Maybe you can show Ranma taking P-chan away to
talk sometime when Akane is asleep; then when Ryouga transforms
himself we know what they were talking about.

Overall a very nice fic. I'm a little confused at the ending though.
What was the basis of Skuld's prediction? Was it simply her own
jealousy that caused her to attack Akane, thereby making it a
self-fullfilling prophecy as she herself caused Ranma's destruction?
Maybe this could be made clearer.

Gary

Gary Kleppe
kleppe@execpc.com, Home page http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe
My fanfics and the FFML map are on my comics/manga page,
       http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics