On Wed, 11 Dec 1996 04:18:54 -0600 Richard Lawson wrote:
: Okay, here's the last part of Magic that I'll post before I rewrite what
: I've written so far and finish the rest of the story.
Ok, so that means we won't see anything new from you for, say, at
least two hours, right? :)
: Your C&C has been invaluable. Things I am going to change:
:
: Nouma will be less perfect. I think I'll eliminate Cairo and tone down
: the Mandarin thing a little.
I would leave his tournament victory in, but change it to a less
prestigeous event. Why not make it an international Martial Arts
championship? It would be a big event and certainly prove Nouma's
prowess to Ranma and others, but it would lack the publicity
factor, since few non-martial artists would really know about it.
I could easily swallow that instead of an olympic gold medal.
Besides, If Nouma's such a wonderful character, wouldn't he have
shunned the fame and attention that is linked to the Olympics? :P
: The Ranma/Father thing. I'm losing the perspective by waffling on
: this. I think I'll go back to calling him Father, and calling Akane
: "Mother", to keep the perspective firmly focused on Nouma.
Do as you want.
: Things I will keep:
:
: Tendo Ranma.
Good. I liked that.
:
: Part 4 - That Which Fuels the Spirit
:
: by Richard Lawson
: Nabiki was sitting in a chair with her eyes closed, accepting a massage from
: Ranma, who certainly knew how to give them. "Damn, Ranma-kun, if I'd known
: you could do this, I'd maybe have not given you back to Akane so easily."
:
: "Easily? You call what you did easy?" Ranma spoke in an amused voice.
:
: "And where would that have left my dear brother?" Kodachi yawned mightily as
: she entered the room. "Maybe they would have found an adjoining cell for him
: at the hospital."
I like the conversation here. It shows that these people have
grown a lot. They all have found their own happyness and can
remember their past desires and follies without regrets or
sadness. Very nice.
: There were a few chuckles at that. Nouma smiled. "That does raise a good
: point. If Uncle Ryoga and Aunt Akari hadn't found each other, would the world
: have come to an end?"
No, it wouldn't, and I think that Nouma should be intelligent
enough to realize that Akari did not truly "save the world", but
averted a massive social upheaval. As it was pointed out during
the C&C on _Interview_, the loss of all livestock would not
threaten humanity's survival at all, and the discovery of plague-
resistant pigs did not solve all the problems it *did* cause. The
*real* catastrophe was the fact that billions of people out ther
*didn't know this* and really, truly believed that they would
starve. The resulting riots and whatnot would have been
catastrophic indeed - and that's what Akari averted by her
discovery. She defused that time-bomb of the mind.
: Ranma nodded. "I think they somehow had their chi drained from them."
:
: Everyone was silent a moment considering this. Finally Mikanma spoke. "Do you
: know of a way to shield us from these attacks, Father?"
:
: "Well, it's something I've never come across.
What about Hinako-sensei? You know, perhaps my very first, joking
guess wasn't so far off... ;)
: "Can you show me the technique?" Ryoga's ability to generate chi was equal to
: Ranma's.
:
: Ranma sighed. "I can try to teach this to all of you, but I'm not certain it
: would succeed. I've had a lifetime of training in the use of my chi; I just
: don't know how I could give you that in a day or two. Certainly you would be
: the best bet to be able to learn it, Ryoga, along with my children."
: Ranma studied her for a moment, then turned towards Nouma. "There's one more
: technique I could try to teach a few of you. It's what I just showed you: the
: ability to give your chi to others. Only those capable of generating a lot of
: chi can safely do it. That limits us to Ryoga, Nouma, Mikanma, and possibly
: Kouichi."
Uh, if that's one *more* technique he wants to show them, what
then is the *first* technique? I thought they were talking about
this one all along?
: He paused to organize his thoughts before continuing. "Tachi, you know all
: about how your Aunt was put under a spell during the battle at Jusendo. She
: was turned into a doll that had sort of a half-life. The spell used your
: Aunt's chi to fuel itself.
Um, only that it wasn't supposed to be a spell. She was
dehydrated - robbed of all water in her body, so that she shrunk
to the size we saw. Nobody put a spell on her, she just was
unlucky enough to touch the Kinjakan with her bare hands, while it
was magically heating up the water. And any nitpicker who stands
up to argue that dehydration doesn't work that way, will be Mouko
Takabisha'd into oblivion, where he can explain that Chi blasts
don't really exist to the tall fellow with the hooded robe and
the scythe. :P
Apart from that I actually liked this retcon. It's so romantic.
:)
: Nouma shook his head. "I had hoped to go visit some museums today to try and
: learn more about the tribe that inhabited that region. Unfortunately, we no
: longer have time for that."
How convenient. :)
: "Feel the connection between you and your sister; that helps. Use that
: connection to guide the chi. Let it bind you and your sister together, and
: when you separate, leave some of yourself behind."
:
: "Use the Force, Luke."
Angus: Hey! That's my line.
: Something exploded on Nouma's hands and up his arms. He yelped and fell over
: backwards, landing among some crates.
Heh, Hand buzzer a la BFG 9000. :)
: Khu Lon was standing over him in a flash. "Are you all right, Nouma?"
Aww, please. I was rooting for them *not* to get together in this
fic. *That* would be something new.
: Nouma chuckled ruefully. He had been quite arrogant; he had assumed that he
: could duplicate Ranma's feat without too much difficulty. He recognized that
: he unconsciously thought himself much better able to learn new techniques than
: his father. He was coming to realize that intelligence was no substitute for
: experience.
Hmmm. And back at the hotel he said this:
: Nouma licked his lips. "But Father, I don't have your lifetime of experience.
: I gave up on learning chi-attacks a few years ago. How can I learn something
: as complex as that?"
Was he <gasp> lying? :)
: "Cologne - " Ranma broke off, looking at Khu Lon apologetically. "Forgive
: me. Your great-great-grandmother didn't have a lot of chi-energy available,
: but she used it with amazing efficiency. I imagine she had spent her life
: perfecting the techniques she taught me and others. For all the skill I've
: acquired in the use of my chi, I still can't match the skill she displayed.
: She's sort of become my idol, an example on how best to use chi."
I don't think that Cologne was ever shown to use any chi attack,
except in that one part, where she taught Ranma the Hiryuu Shouten
Ha. She *did* know about the Shishi Houkou Dan, but otherwise I
don't think she ever displayed any use of chi direct for attacks.
: The clambered out.
"They"
: Nouma spent a minute admiring the gorgeous scenery. None
: of these mountains could compare to Mt. Fuji, but there were so many of them
: that they took his breath away.
Um, I don't think Japan suffers from a lack of mountains. With
3200 meters they may not be the Himalaya, but the canadian Rockies
aren't that much bigger, I believe.
: The next couple of hours were spent setting up camp. 'Camp' didn't seem like
: an adequate term to Nouma, however. The plastic cabins could withstand a
: typhoon, and the portable generators provided enough electricity to fuel a
: small factory. As it turned out, his fears about running water were unfounded.
: A separate facility would take water from a nearby stream and provide them
: with all the amenities they could wish for, including a good-sized bath.
: Nabiki assured him that the waste water would be thoroughly cleaned before
: being returned to the stream.
:
: Most amazing was the 'crime lab', as Nabiki called it. There were several
: advanced diagnostic tools available to them. The command console was put there
: as well. Nabiki admitted that there was a good chance they wouldn't need any
: of the equipment, but she wanted to be fully prepared.
Which leads me all the more to believe that all this stuff will be
of no use during the actual confrontation. :)
: "Father! I was not ogling you."
:
: "Could have fooled me."
:
: Nouma snorted. "Yeah, right. I can just see myself lying in the
: psychiatrist's office, talking about how I'm sexually attracted to my father's
: female manifestation. The Freudians would have a field day."
Waahahaha! <snicker, chuckle> That was great.
: "There's some truth to that. The danger bells are still going off." Ranma
: looked down into the water, speaking quietly. "I haven't told this to anyone,
: not even your mother. I've been having dreams. I can see my body lying on
: rock. It's being cradled by someone - you, I think. I see bodies all around
: it, and I don't know if they're dead or not. And I can hear laughter, and
: the mocking whispers of something. I want to see more, but I always lose the
: dream at that point."
Hmmm. Mysterious dreams... Always good material. If I judge
Richard right, this dream will actually come to pass, but it will
probably means something other than we think right now, or will
have some deeper aspects that will be revealed later.
: Nouma looked into Ranma's eyes for a long time, trying to assimilate what
: he'd just heard. "That's why you've been trying to teach me that transference
: technique. You're hoping I can save your life."
He didn't go and tried to teach them - they *asked* him to do so.
: Nouma continued to look steadily at Ranma. "How were you planning to transfer
: the curse to me?"
:
: "I was actually hoping that you wouldn't have to be cursed at all. I've got
: lots of contacts around the world; if I could just give them your name, they'll
: call you if they need help."
:
: "But what about the magic? Doesn't that play a part in all of your quests?
: You've said that becoming female is sometimes necessary."
:
: "I'm hoping that we can leave the magic out of it. I've learned an awful lot
: during the past twenty-five years. If I can teach it to you, you won't have
: to rely on the magic like I've had to. Instead of the magic bringing
: adventures to you, you can look for the adventures yourself. Proactive, rather
: than reactive. As to becoming female, you'll find ways around that. You're
: smart."
Is "Proactive" actually a word?
Anyway, I don't think that would work - at least not the way Ranma
thinks it would. The thing about his role in this world is that
he is the wild card, the last chance - someone who turns up and
saves a situation nobody else could save. Nouma would certainly
be able to seek out cases where he could lend assistance and would
do a lot of good this way, but Ranma's path led him to places and
people that you wouldn't hear about through the usual channels. I
don't think that Nouma could duplicate that with mundane means -
he needs the magic to do that.
Judging from the information in this part, I think there probably
*is* a way to pass on the flame, as it were, without cursing Nouma
anew. Somewhere later the Chi eater says that it expects to be
able to absorb the curse's magic too, just like it does with chi,
so I speculate that they may be in some way related or at least
vaguely similar. Now, Ranma said that passing on chi to another
person feels like giving them a part of your soul... You see what
I am getting at. It is not entirely unthinkable that there may be
a way to pass on the part of the curse that enables the trouble to
find Nouma, instead of the other way round; The part that
includes the sense of danger and stuff like that.
Anyway, let's see what Richard cooks up (I really, *really* have
to stop trying to figure out Richard before he gets to it - on the
other hand, that's half the fun). :)
: Ranma grimaced. "I'm not sure, either. I think the first step we would take
: would be for you and me to go visit the Guide. She could help us understand
: how the magic works, and we could go from there."
:
: "She?"
:
: "Plum's the Guide now."
You say "The Guide" as if it was immediately clear who was meant.
Just because there was only one guide in the Ranma 1/2 tales
doesn't mean that everybody there knows right away who is meant by
"The Guide". Just change that to "the Jusenkyou Guide" and
everything's okay.
Angus: Heh, "The Guide... There can only be one!"
: For the moment, no one was outside. Mikanma looked around, then slipped into
: the trees.
:
: She moved off a small distance, then turned on her computer. She accessed a
: map of the area, which showed their campsite, and the cave. The cave was
: about five kilometers off. Mikanma studied the map carefully, memorizing its
: details, before shutting off the computer and leaving it under a tree. It
: wouldn't do to have them track her through her computer.
Sebastian: There is an unknown monster of unpreceded
dangerousness about that drains people of their chi
and kills them.
Angus: What can we do? [pauses] I know...
Both together: *Let's Split Up*!
Really, that was *so* stupid of her. I mean, hunger for
adventure and need to impress aside, *nobody* could be *that*
dumb. Doesn't she watch movies? Jeez.
: The bear seemed to take offense at the box's behavior. It growled, then
: swiped at the box with its paw. The box rolled on its side, still squawking.
: The bear huffed and put its front paw on the box. It apparently put its
: weight on the box; it crumpled, sending sparks flying. The bear roared in
: pain, turned, and ran away, clearly favoring its front paw.
Conveeeeenient...
*Too* convenient, in fact. Things like that don't *happen* in the
real world, Mikanma - they're staged.
: She would show them. She would show her brother and her father that she
: wasn't totally useless. There was more to her than just martial arts. She
: would scout the cave, and bring back valuable information, and Father would
: be forced to admit that she was as good as Nouma.
:
: "Or better than Nouma?"
Angus: Don't talk to yourself, kid. It's unhealthy.
Sebastian: She's not talking to *herself* exactly...
Angus: Even worse. If you hear disembodied voices in your
head, even when you take off your walkman, you should call
a shrink - or at least the National Enquirer. Talking to
people who don't exist is just plain bad for you.
Sebastian: But I am talking to you, too, and it's... Uh, nevermind.
Angus: That's different, because- Hey! What are you insinuating?
Sebastian: ...
Angus: That's *not* funny.
: Ryoga was having a bad dream. He was wandering from room to room, looking
: for Akari. He couldn't find her. He'd leave a room, only to find that he
: had somehow ended up back in the same room. Finally he'd get out of the room,
: only to find that he had ended up in Okinawa. He'd called out his wife's
: name. He'd hear a very faint echo of her calling for him. He'd try to run
: towards the sound, but it only faded away.
A really interesting insight into Ryouga's brain. You realize, of
course, that all the section with Mikanma and now Ryouga will have
to be told from an omniscient POV, thus breaking your plan of
having Nouma be the narrative center, so to speak.
: He finally stopped. This was getting him nowhere. He would have to go back
: to camp and get Ranma. He, at least, would be able to catch his daughter.
: He'd be in a better position to console her, too.
:
: Ryoga looked around and frowned. He was a long, long way from camp. There
: was no trail, and even if there had been, Ryoga knew he was quite capable of
: wandering for days looking for the camp. He hadn't brought his computer -
: Mikanma had dragged him from the cabin before he could do so much as put on
: his boots. He could perhaps fire Moko Takashibas into the air until someone
: came after him, but his best bet was to catch Mikanma - she would eventually
: get tired of running and let him catch up.
It's good to see Ryouga actually *thinking* about the situation,
instead of blindly falling into Mikanma's machinations. This is
no stupid teenager anymore. The fact that the way he chooses
turns out to be a bad choice is not so important to me, as long as
he *did* think about it.
: His chi was almost gone, and his ability to think was diminishing as well.
: Akari filled his eyes. He apologized to her and told her that he loved her.
:
: Then he made his decision.
Which, of course, must remain shrouded in mystery at this time.
:)
: It needs to done delicately.
? "be done"?
: The thought of how important she would be washed away the pain. Lifting her
: eyes from the corpse in front of her, Mikanma ran from the cave, determined
: to get back to camp before anyone knew she was missing.
Well. I just hope that someone was monitoring either her or
Ryouga's computer and caught a glimpse of what happened here
(Mikanma leaving and hiding her computer, or her entering of
Ryouga's room). Back in Japan it should have been daytime, so I
don't think that's too unlikely.
We'll see. Soon, hopefully.
Sebastian