Plague of Skulds Part 6 of 8 An Oh! My Goddess Fanfic By Jim Nutley jnutley@lvnexus.net Please send me comments! Good or Bad. All characters created by Kosuke Fujishima were used without permission, as were characters from products by Studio CLAMP and Bandai. This story may not be sold. Many thanks to Brett Handy for allowing me to use his character Brett, God of Destiny. Many thanks to Lloyd Goodbar for allowing me to use his character Riana, a Goddess of Relief Goddess Office. Please do not repost this fanfic, since I will be modifying it in response to comments from the ML. I will make a repostable version available when I have had a chance to respond to comments. *********** "Hey, Brett!", called a voice. Brett had been about to go into the hallway wall clock and down to the Temple house in Nekomi, he was aiming for just after dinner dishes had been put away, so Belldandy wouldn't feel compelled to cook him something. He turned and saw Riana running down the hallway to catch him. She was about Skuld's age, and a work study student here in the Relief Goddess Office. He had learned to recognize her by her height and face shape, since she changed her outfit, hair color, and sometimes her skin tone on a daily basis. Even the combat boots she had favored when he first met her had given way to some kind of sports shoe. "G'day Riana", he replied, then looked at her face a little closer. "Tiger stripes today?" "Oooh!, I hadn't thought about Tiger Stripes! That sounds cool." Riana broke into a big smile, she loved to talk about her various looks. "These are just stripes. They started out to be Roscharh marks, so I could ask people what they saw on my cheeks. But, I couldn't make them look like anything but stains. You should have heard Mom go into her 'Och child, when will you be yourself' lecture. I'll try tiger stripes tomorrow, maybe with little 'B''s on the cheekbones to give you the trade mark. Anyway, could you take this package to Skuld for me?", Riana held out a small package wrapped in brown paper, only a little bigger than a VCR tape. "She's been asking for this when we E-mail each other, but I havn't had a chance to take it to her." "No worries", Brett took the proffered package. "Say, how'd you know I was going there?" "If you're not here, you're there.", Riana replied. "Getting that predictable am I?" "Have a good trip." , Riana stated and turned to go. "Thanks!" she called over her shoulder. *********** It seemed as though hours went by to Keiichi, even though his watch registered less than 20 minutes since he had first ended up outside the temple. Finally the flow of Skulds seemed to be weakening. After a few more moments he saw a chance and slipped back in through the front door. There were still enough Skuld's coming out that he ended up inching along the wall to stay out of their way. When he craned his neck around to peer into the TV/Dining room he found Belldandy. She was sitting in her usual place, where she knitted, but the room was crawling with Skulds. They had the TV apart, they had the legs off the table, they were climbing on and doing things to the walls, one was hanging from a belt and doing something to the florescent light fixture in the ceiling while another had poked a hole in the ceiling and was passing tools and parts to the one working on the light. One Skuld sat in Belldandy's lap giving her a big hug while another sat right beside her and snuggled close. Two more were combing her hair. At least three had Belldandy's knitting needles spread out on the floor along with some impromptu blueprint diagrams and one of Skuld's own toolsets. "Belldandy! Are you alright?" Keiichi asked. Belldandy opened her mouth to reply, but was cut off by several Skulds. "What do you mean?", "Are you implying I/We would hurt her?", "I still hate you, Peeeeedah!". "I am fine, Keiichisan. Now please Skuld(s), he didn't mean you any insult." Muttering, the various Skulds turned back to their tasks, except for one, who stood glowering at Keiichi with arms crossed. "Oneesama.", said the Skuld in Belldandy's lap, "I want you to pay attention to Me, not him." "Right!" agreed the snuggling Skuld next to her. "Please turn you head this way." requested the hair combing Skulds, as they turned Belldandy's head away from Keiichi. Belldandy sighed, "It's going to take a few hours, Keiichisan, for the energy Terai gave Skuld to dissipate. She isn't using it as fast as I used Amaterasusama's. None of us here can take it back from her, so I'm afraid we just have to let this run it's course." "Hey!", said the Skuld on Belldandy's lap, "You haven't given me a chance!" Other Skulds chimed in as well, "We're not going to screw this up!" "We'll make you proud of us, Oneesama." The Skuld scowling at Keiichi growled, AYou're encouraging her to distrust me!" "Well", replied Keiichi to Belldandy, "You seem to have everything you need, I suppose I could just grab my magazine and wait here with you." "Oh no you don't!", said the Skuld who was still scowling at Keiichi, "You're just looking for a chance to take Oneesama away from me!" "But .." began Keiichi. He was reluctant to make trouble with Skuld mostly because he liked her, and the fact that there must literally be thousands of her around right now made him even more careful. "Keiichisan," Belldandy had turned her head back toward Keiichi, despite the Skulds wishes, "When someone divides in to many copies, and I've never heard of anyone taking it this far, their whims and quirks can clump into one or two individuals. I'm afraid these parts of Skuld that desperately want my attention intend to monopolize me until this is over." "Humm", replied Keiichi as he bent down to 'face' the single, rather unfriendly Skuld in front of him, "That would make you, ...". "The Skuld who still hates you.", then she stuck out her tongue at him "Peeeedah!" "Well," continued Keiichi, "Since there's nothing else I can do about this, I wonder if you'd still hate me if I took you out for Ice Cream?" "That's bribery." "You got that right." Skuld who still hated Keiichi raised her eyebrows and flipped her hair in what looked like an imitation of Sayoko. "I'll allow you to try." "All right, lets go. Belldandy, I'm taking this Skuld out for Ice Cream." It then crossed Keiichi's mind that thousands of Skulds might decide to horn in on this, but, oddly, none of them seemed to notice. "Have a good time," said Belldandy, "I'll see what I can do to keep this from getting farther out of hand.", Belldandy stopped a passing Skuld, "Please bring Terai here Now, Skuld.", She asked of her. Then Skuld who still hated Keiichi slipped around behind him and with a boost from a pair of passing Skulds ran up Keiichi's back, grabbed both his ears and locked her legs around his neck. "Ha ha, Skuld on your back says, no more stalling, lets go!!" "Ouch, yes Ma'am." replied Keiichi. Keiichi left the TV/Dining room, went down the hall and put on his shoes. As he opened the front door and stepped out, there suddenly appeared a Skuld with many chevrons on her sleeve and a WWI era widebrimmed campaign hat, Sergeant Skuld without a doubt. As Skuld on his back reigned him in with painful pulls on his ears, A troop of Skulds came around the side of the building. Sergeant Skuld opened her mouth and a parade ground voice came loudly out. She yelled, "MARCHIN' AT THE DOUBLE TIME, CORP SOUND OFF". The troop of Skulds began trotting in cadence together, while many of them clapped their hands in time to the rhythm their feet were making. As they went by they shouted/chanted; "NASTY OLD SISTER, WE WON'T TAKE ANY MORE, GONNA DO JUST WHAT WE WISH WE'D DONE A THOUSAND TIMES BEFORE, GONNA TIE YOU UP, AND TURN YOU 'ROUND, AND KICK YOU OUT THE DOOR! WE'RE SKULD'S OWN!, AWESOME!, ANTI-URD CORP!" Hoisted above each block of Skulds in the troop, outnumbered by about 25 to 1, where each of the five little Urds. They struggled and pleaded and cried as they went by, but Keiichi couldn't even hear them over the chant of the Anti-Urd Corp. The last little Urd reached out pitifully as she was carried past Keiichi, but the Skuld on his back leaned next to one of his ears and said, "Don't even think about it." A few minutes later the side car motorcycle pulled out onto the street with Keiichi driving and a small Skuld in the side car, and went off into the night. ********** With a brief flash of blue light, Brett popped out of the hallway clock in the Temple house. He was surprised to find the clock on the floor instead of the wall, and two small Skulds disassembling it. Brett had seen Urd do the 'divide by five' trick, but hadn't remembered Skuld having the power or the inclination. "G'day Skulds", he improvised. "G'day Brett!", chorused the Skulds, obviously in a good mood. Brett headed toward the TV/Dining room, and was passed by five Skulds carrying what looked like the handle from the kitchen's manual water pump. 'That was seven, wasn't it?' he thought. 'What was it Urd had said about the maximum safe number of copies being proportional to a person's power. Hummm.' Brett didn't think for a moment that Skuld could have more power than Urd. But then he entered the TV/Dining room. And just stood in the door for a while. Some how a large lacquered table had materialized, and Skulds in various costumes were all around it. There were big poster maps of Japan and white boards on the walls. The TV was in a different place, and had a much sharper picture than he remembered, could it be new? The place looked like a Hollywood version of a war room. Skulds were swarming everywhere, writing on the white boards, placing handfuls of pins on the maps, fussing around the costumed Skulds at the table. Then he spotted Belldandy, judging by the walls, she was sitting in her customary knitting spot, and there were Skulds all over her too. Next to her sat the only other non-Skuld in the place, a little pre- teen girl with yellow, not blonde, hair. "Welcome Brettsan, please come in." Belldandy said. So Brett sat down beside them. "This is Terai, Skuld's very helpful guest." The little girl winced as if Belldandy had threatened to strike her. Brett, having known the gentle mistress of the Temple almost as long as he'd been a Deity, didn't understand that at all. "Quite ...active... around here tonight", Brett commented. "Well, I just stopped by to say I passed my Wishbringer tests, and I'll be getting my first assignment tomorrow." "Congratulations!", Belldandy beamed, "I'm so excited for you, Brettsan." Brett couldn't help but grin back at her. "I was planning on springing it on everyone together, but then I'd also really like to hear any advise you'd like to give me, without anyone else interrupting." "Yes," said Belldandy, "And I'm sure she'll have a lot to say to you. All that I'll say is, Remember to encourage them to request what they themselves desire most. No one is chosen lightly, and what they desire is worthy or they wouldn't have been chosen." "Thanks, Belldandy. I'll try to remember that." A stuffy looking Skuld chose that moment to pound on the table. "Deities and Stars of the Heavens, Prime Minister Skuld!" Two Skulds in expensive three piece suits entered the room, one was clearly the PM, the other, her personal assistant, walked a little behind and to the PM's left. As the PM took her place at the head of the table, Brett suddenly had a feeling of deja vu, although for some reason he thought the scene should have been in black and white. And what did Skuld mean by '...Stars of the Heavens...'. The PM spoke before sitting down, "Fellow Skulds and Honored Guests, especially you, our Deific Sister, tonight, thanks to the help of our dear friend", the PM nodded toward Terai, "The cause of Skuld leaps forward to a dazzling conclusion!" There was a cheer then, from every Skuld within earshot at that time, so Brett clapped along with the crowd. Belldandy kept her hands in her lap, and Terai looked nervous. "And now," said the PM, "General Skuld will begin the briefing." A Skuld with lots of stars on her shoulders, but only a tasteful number of medals on her jacket, stood. "Skulds have been deployed from Sendai to Okayama and are taking up their assigned stations." General Skuld pointed to a wall map. Tiny stick pins covered central Honshu like a blanket. "There are 10,786,325 total Skulds at this time. Materials have been procured and, ..." "Bloody Hell!", said Brett, "10 Million Skulds!" "Yes.", replied the General, "Construction is well under way and procurement teams are being reassigned to secondary tasks. Debug Hour will not be moved up, but will remain Four AM tomorrow morning, at the request of Chief Scientist Skuld." The General nodded toward a Skuld in a white lab coat, who stood up as the General took her seat. "I have requested the additional time be spent performing integrity tests of the circuitry, since many components are being hand constructed in the field. The additional testing will ensure a high success rate at activation, or, as the General puts it, Debug Hour." "Excuse me," said Terai in a small voice. The PM spoke at once, "The chair recognizes our friend Terai", there was widespread applause, even from Chief Scientist Skuld, who had been interrupted. "What are you building, Skuld?" asked Terai. "Hadn't we made that clear," said PM Skuld, "We're building Debugging Machines." "More than 500,000 machines will be deployed by Debug Hour." stated General Skuld. "Their simultaneous and successful activation will leave central Honshu undebatably bug free." concluded Chief Scientist Skuld. "We can arrange to have you tour two local production sites and inspect the finished prototype which has had a long and successful run." said a Skuld with the 'Public Relations' name tag in front of her chair. "Oh dear.", said Belldandy, "Skuld, have you 'borrowed' 500,000 rice cookers?" With almost fifty Skulds in the room, not one would meet Belldandy's eyes. ********* Mrs Shido was rapidly growing furious. "Hikaru! Come here Now!". Her red haired, 16 year old daughter bounced in, "Yeah, Mom?", she asked cheerfully. "Stop talking like a boy! How will I ever find a husband for such an un- feminine daughter?!" "I'm very sorry, Mother.", said a suitably chastened Hikaru. "Now," continued Mrs. Shido, "I have three men to feed, so they can teach in the Dojo. I need to begin cooking now for their next meal." Mrs. Shido went to one of the cupboards and flung open the doors. "Where are my rice cookers?" Hikaru looked at the empty cupboard shelves, where she had put the rice cookers after cleaning them. "I don't know where they are, Mother." "What do you mean, you don't know?!" answered Mrs Shido. Hikaru would remember that evening unhappily for some time, since not till the following morning would the fate of the Shido rice cookers be revealed. At that moment however, on the roof of the building that was both the home and the Kendo dojo of the Shido family, a team of Skulds was modifying one of the Shido's rice cookers into a copy of Skuld's own debugging machine. The scene was repeated on many roofs, throughout the central part of Honshu Island. Many Skulds were no longer needed for debugging machine construction now that the necessary materials had been acquired, and so millions had turned to 'secondary tasks'. In a very modern factory facility, running almost without human occupation thru the night, a mob of Skulds had begun working on repairing a large but dormant industrial robot. In several dumps and used car lots, Skulds were swarming over various cars considered unfit to drive. At a base of the Japan Self Defense Force, three F-16s scheduled for maintenance were receiving their repairs tonight, as the Skuld maintainer squadron came together. Overall, Skuld(s) expected to 'repair' most of the unwatched machines in Japan that night, except for the rice cookers. *********** Keiichi pulled the side car motorcycle up in a parking area a short walk from the Ice Cream store Skuld who hated him had specified. She rapidly climbed out of his sidecar and onto his back and neck again. "Hey, let me get my helmet off willya!", said Keiichi. With his helmet in hand and a Skuld on his back, Keiichi headed over to the Ice Cream store. He was absolutely certain that it would be closed, but this was the place Skuld who hated him had insisted apon. The lights were out inside the place as they came up to the entrance, but then someone opened the door for them. A Skuld in the Ice Cream places's waitress costume said, "Welcome Skuld and Keiichi, please follow me to your table." They were led to a booth and Keiichi was handed a menu. "Hey!", said Skuld who hated Keiichi, "I didn't say he could have any!" "But Skuld," said Waitress Skuld, "We're going to have to get all this Ice Cream eaten before it melts, since we had to get it out of the freezer." "Hummph!!", said Skuld who hated Keiichi. "Skuld," asked Keiichi of Waitress Skuld, "What's going on?" Waitress Skuld leaned close to Keiichi, "We're tuning the Ice Cream freezer and modifying the Ice Cream making machines, had to make some space in the freezer for equipment." 'Well,' thought Keiichi, 'at least she hasn't turned on the lights, with luck no one will notice we're here.' "You know what I want!", roared Skuld who hated Keiichi at Waitress Skuld, "Now get moving!" "Don't be so grouchy! It's coming already!", answered Waitress Skuld. *********** Back at the temple, Brett was questioning a deceptively ordinary looking young lady. "You're a star?" "Actually Brettsama, I haven't grown dense enough to fuse ordinary hydrogen yet." "A protostar then." "Yes, Brettsama." "Brett's enough. Anyway, you're having an 'Out of body' experience running around here on Earth in the shape of a girl?" "Yes, Brettsama." Brett sighed. "And you've imparted so much power to Skuld that she's made 10 million copies of herself and has blanketed central Japan to build debugging machines?" "Yes Brettsama." "Why?" "Well, Brettsama, Skuld is my friend. I wanted to help her eliminate the Bugs because that was why she was here." Terai hung her head then, looking sorrowfully embarrassed. "Also, after killing everyone within twenty kilometers of Tokyo Bay last night, I really wanted to do something positive." Now Brett was truly dumfounded. He couldn't imagine what to say next. "Don't worry, Brettsan", injected Belldandy, "Everyone Terai killed is alive now." Which only confused him more, if that was possible, so Brett found his voice and moved on to the next order of business. "Belldandy, where's Urd?" "I haven't seen her since Skuld began to multiply. Skuld, where is Urd?" "Out in the back under the trees." answered a Skuld. "Oneesama," said the Skuld on Belldandy's lap, "Tell me a story." "Please turn your head this way." said one of the combing Skulds. "Come on Terai, cheer up!" said a Skuld, who plopped down beside her friend, "Ask me more questions!" "I'll go find her, then.", Brett stated. He lifted himself up off the floor and made his careful way through the crowd of Skulds toward the door. As Brett left, PM Skuld leaned surreptitiously over to General Skuld. "General, what is the status of Special Clandestine Mission #1?" The General smiled, almost wickedly. "We have achieved 40% satisfaction, Madam Prime Minister, and are well prepared to politely pacify interference." The PM Skuld smiled, the Chief Scientist Skuld smiled, soon every Skuld in the area had a naughty grin of some sort on her face. *********** Keiichi was slowly finishing his two scoops of Red Bean ice cream. Skuld who hated him was working on her second Lucky Badger seven scoop super bowl. Everything seemed quiet and peaceful. Then two Waitress Skulds and three Ice Cream Scooper Skulds took position by the counter. "Here comes the first shift.", said one of them. The door burst open, and hundreds of Skulds in her Standard Goddess Uniform poured in, ordering every kind of Ice Cream under the sun. *********** Brett hadn't much cared for Jonathan Swift when he was required to read him back in High School. Now that he found himself living out the Lilliput episode, he was really considering hopping back in time and punching the Irishman's face in. There were at least twenty Skulds assigned to 'politely pacifying' Brett, which meant that they had him pinned on his back, spread eagle, under one of the trees, with ropes and Skulds holding both his arms and legs down. Sergeant Skuld was literally standing on his chest, mini combat boots and all. They had been smart enough to filch all his watches too, so he couldn't teleport away. From off to his left came the noise of a loud 'Whack' followed by a pitiful little howl of pain. "Look Skuld," he said trying to reason with her/them again, "I'll admit, there've been times when I've wanted to spank her myself." "Hentai.", said Sergeant Skuld. "Out of Anger!" growled Brett, getting a little red in the face, "But even you should be able to see that this has gone TOO BLOODY FAR!" "I have my orders.", stated Sergeant Skuld. Off to the left, two little Urds were tied to a tree trunk watching the scene (not Brett's) in tearful horror. Two more were inside a compound guarded on every side by members of the Anti-Urd Corp, where they were trying to decide if their sore little bottoms were more comfortable standing up or laying down. The other little Urd, the third so far, was tied with loops around her torso to the end of a rope suspended from a branch, far overhead. Behind her, members of the Anti-Urd Corp were turning the cranks that drew back a long plank on the arm of a contraption that resembled a medieval catapult. When the plank clicked into position the little Urd target started kicking and shouting "NONONO!" at the top of her lungs. A member of the Anti-Urd Corp raised her hand and watched the kicks for an opening. When the little target Urd's legs started to get tired again, the Anti-Urd Skuld brought down her hand, and released a lever and 'WHACK!' the plank connected properly with the little Urd's bottom and sent her in an arc that almost took the rope parallel to the ground, while the little Urd howled all the way.