Part 1 of ?

This is my first Ranma story idea. It's a little more serious
than Ranma, and takes place off the main story line at no
specific part of the manga/anime other than all the main
characters are there.

                  A few little words,
                 A few little problems.

        "RANMA NO BAKA!" A wooden mallet descended, smashing
Ranma on the head. A pretty, teen aged girl with a roundish
face, wearing a plain yellow dress, had implanted the
implement on the head of her fiance. She stormed up to her
room, leaving the unfortunate boy to recover consciousness on
his own.
************************************************************
     I fell onto my bed. "Why does he have to be such
a jerk?" I sobbed into my pillow. "He's always so mean to
me!" I started taking off my dress, thinking that it would be
good to practice in the dojo. As I did so, I began to think
about how he always was nice to Shampoo and Ukyou. "Ukyou's a
longtime friend, but Shampoo... He loves her, I know it!"
This only made me even more furious. That's it, I thought to
my self, "He's going to get it this time."
     By now, I was dressed and went downstairs to
find the two-timing pervert. He wasn't there, he had left.
"Probably to find Shampoo!" I took off after him.
************************************************************
     I was walking down towards the beach. It usually
was a good thing to do after I got into a fight with Akane.
But, sometimes, I just didn't understand her.
     "What did I do this time?" I thought to myself,
or at least, I thought I was talking to myself. All I did was
say that her cooking tasted horrible. I mean, what else could
I say? Rice shouldn't be green, and chicken was supposed to
be, well, edible. Why can't she just stick to the stuff she's
good at?
     "Niaho, Ranma!" That was all the warning I got
before I saw beautiful, purple-haired girl running towards
me.
     "Shampoo...." I groaned. That's the last straw.
I'm sick of this.
     I got ready to deal with her one last time.
************************************************************
     I found the man I love! I'm so happy! "Niaho,
Ranma!" Something was strange, he was glaring at me in a
strange way. Oh well, I love being with him. I kept running
forward, and jumped towards him.
     He caught me, maybe he finally changed his mind
about that violent Akane. But, he, he won't hug me.
     "What wrong Ranma? What Ranma 'do this time'?"
     "Shampoo. We have to talk. This is about our
relationship."
     "Ranma and Shampoo have relationship?" My voice
uncontrollably happy. "We go home to China and marry?"
************************************************************
     I had just finished closing my shop, and was
preparing to go for a walk in the beautiful moonlight.
Ran-chan had not come into the shop tonight, so I figured
Kasumi had cooked dinner tonight. I was wondering where he
was, until I heard Shampoo say "What Ranma do this time?"
     Ranchan's statement hurt. Terribly. "Shampoo. We
have to talk. This is about our relationship." I didn't hear
anything for the next few minutes. His relationship with
Shampoo! He never had a relationship with Shampoo! How could
he like such a bimbo? Or was that it. He liked her because
she was a bimbo, and with Akane gone, probably pissed at him
for some stupid reason, he was free to be with that wretched
Chinese whore!
     If that's what it takes, to win his heart,
though, I thought to myself, then figured I could be a little
more brazen than I was, and maybe win him that way.
************************************************************
     None of the three people noticed a girl in a
Karate gi looking at the two embracing forms. Only the
greatest willpower and need-to-know kept her from attacking
Ranma and Shampoo, who were obviously hugging each other
passionately.
************************************************************
     "Shampoo, let go of me." What was he talking
about? He has to love me! He was so serious this time:
something new, almost scared, was in his voice. He must be
ready to marry me! I let him go, so he could properly propose
to me, the way they do it in Japan and in the movies.
     "Shampoo want know." I finally managed. My eyes
were misting at the happy thoughts of Ranma and I in China,
raising beautiful little warrrioresses and warriors.
     "Shampoo, you have to listen to everything I
say." So serious. Maybe even grave?
     "Shampoo listen." I told him. He knew I would do
whatever he asked me to, especially marry him.
     "Shampoo, I'm going to tell you something I
haven't told anyone else, not even Akane or Ukyou."
************************************************************
        That Ranma was really pissing me off. I could feel my
chi building around me, the little blue haze which made
everything somehow clearer and crisper. It made people stand
out, and increased my strength. That bastard would get it
good as soon as I heard what he had to say. Keeping secrets
from his fiancee!
************************************************************
     "Ranchan, how could you? Telling Shampoo
something you won't tell me. Isn't our friendship worth
that?" I brushed my black hair from my eyes and retreated
into a bush, wishing I had brought my combat spatula with me,
now. That wench was ruining a perfectly good night.
************************************************************
     Ranma was going to tell me a big secret. I was
shivering in excitement: he was probably going to tell me
that he loved me.
     "Shampoo," he began, "I don't love you."
     "You no love Shampoo because Shampoo stupid.
Shampoo not stupid, just cannot talk Japanese." I knew I
shouldn't have listened to great-grandmother when she told me
that Japanese guys only liked bimbos. "Shampoo improve, then
go to China with husband."
     "Shampoo," he began again, "it's not that. I
like you. I like you a lot. You're a good friend, but I can't
marry you." I was crushed, then I realized what he was
saying. He liked me more than Akane, but was still trying to
figure out how to get out of marrying her.
     "Ranma want marry Shampoo, but crazy, violent
girl keep you from feelings?" I asked him, my hopes
brightening with that thought.
************************************************************
     That was it, Ranma is dead, I thought to my self
as I looked for something to pound him into the ground with.
To my left, there was a large wooden mallet. Where does that
thing come from?
     I ran out to hit him. The blue haze was getting
darker, and my eyesight clearer.
************************************************************
        I saw Akane's blue aura, and knew she was going to
pound my Ran-chan and Shampoo. Unless I killed Shampoo first,
that is. That brazen whore won my fiance! I thought to
myself. All this time, hoping that he would look my direction
and realize that I loved him. All this time, waiting, and now
shattered by someone who wanted to kill his girl half. It
just wasn't fair.
************************************************************
     Finally, he spoke to me. "Shampoo, you have it
wrong. I love Akane, not you, not Ukyou." Tears started
flowing from my eyes as he said that.
************************************************************
     Akane stopped dead in her tracks. The mysterious
hammer fell to the ground, then disappeared. Ukyou froze,
then collapsed to the ground, palms caressing her face.
************************************************************
     "Shampoo no believe Ranma! Ranma no love crazy
violent girl!" I protested. He couldn't love her. What would
I do then? I couldn't kill her, because Ranma would never
love me. All I could do was hope I was having a nightmare.
"Ranma no love her! Ranma marry Shampoo!"
     "Sometimes, Shampoo, I honestly wish it was you
or Ukyou that I loved. I mean, she doesn't love me. If she
loved me, she wouldn't hit me."
     "But, violent girl no love Ranma, so Ranma marry
someone else!" Please, don't let this be happening. Ranma has
to love me, or else he would've lost to me and not had to
marry me.
     "I'm only jibing her half the time. She acts
like one of the guys, and I like her so much it's so easy to
forget that she doesn't like being called names.
     "She just doesn't understand what I go through.
Every time I get splashed with cold water, I turn into a
girl. The only way I can cope is to be proud of how I look. I
spent my entire childhood being proud of how manly I was
going to be, then everything changed.
     "There, I've said it. Now, I want to know what
you are going to do about Akane."
     I started to sniffle. My hope was gone. "Shampoo
no know what to do. You ruin life."
     "I--I'm sorry, Shampoo." Ranma hugged me,
finally. But, it was wrong. This wasn't the way it was
supposed to be. "I didn't want to ruin your life, but I
couldn't keep doing this. I just can't keep pretending that I
don't love her. Now I have to tell Ukyou and Akane."
     Neither of us said anything for at least five
minutes. I was trying to imagine how I would recover my lost
honor and explain this to great-grandmother. I don't know
what Ranma was doing, my eyes were staring at the pavement
the entire time. I think his hand was against my head, trying
to console me.
     Great-grandmother would insist that I try some
other stupid scheme. I didn't want to do that. I was tired of
it all. It just wasn't fair. And it hurt. It hurt very badly.
     "Shampoo, I don't want to lose your friendship,
and I don't want to lose Ukyou's friendship, but I wouldn't
blame either of you if you never want to see me again. But,
don't hurt Akane, that's all I ask."
     "Shampoo go now. Shampoo hurt." I ran off, and
ran into Ukyou, who was sitting on the sidewalk, her head
buried in her hands.
************************************************************
     The words bit hard. "Shampoo, you have it wrong.
I love Akane, not you, not Ukyou."
     I just slumped to the ground meekly and let my
face fall into my hands. "Ranchan. Ever since I was a child,
I've loved you. And you end up falling in love with Akane.
How? How, Ran-chan?" I didn't even notice Shampoo running
towards me until she fell over me.
     By the time I realized what happened, Shampoo
was sitting beside me, tears running down her pretty face.
"Why Ranma love Akane?"
     "I don't know why."
     "Shampoo not know what to do." She sniffled, and
tried vainly to stop crying.
     "I don't know either, Shampoo." She started
crying again. I just stared blankly into nothing. My whole
life was a waste. I was stuck running this little okonomiyaki
shop for I don't know how long.
************************************************************
     After Shampoo broke away from me, I heard her
run off. I figured if she wanted to be left alone, the worst
thing I could do was follow her, so I continued my walk down
towards the beach. I felt so bad, having to tell Shampoo that
I didn't love her. I did destroy her life. When I told Ukyou,
it would be just as bad, if not worse.
     Momentarily, I thought Shampoo might try to kill
herself, or the old hag would make her try to do something
like that. "No, she's not stupid."
************************************************************
     The road was hard, and it had taken me much
longer than I expected to arrive here. Somehow I had ended up
in Russia. But, regardless of those minor setbacks, I vowed
to defeat Ranma this time.
     Suddenly, I came upon Akane, sitting on her
knees on the roadway dressed in her gi. "Akane, what
happened?" I noticed her gi was messed up badly. From the
looks of it, she had been on the bad end of a fight.
     "Ryouga. It's Ranma. He..." She was crying.
Ranma had hurt her. He probably hit her, after all, he was
about the only one at the Tendo's residence who could hit
her, and he was such a coward that he wouldn't show for our
duel, the true sign of a dishonorable person.
     I wouldn't just regain my honor when I fought
Ranma, I would save Akane from him.
     "Ryouga, he loves me." She said it so seriously.
I was shocked. Even though he hit her, she loved him? "I was
chasing after him, because I thought he was going to go to
Shampoo. He did, and told her that he loved me."
     That explained the condition of her gi, and I
was forced to think about Ranma for a minute. Then, Akane
started talking again, muffled sniffles coming through her
speech. "Ryouga, I feel so bad. I always get mad at him for
stupid little things. He's right, I can't cook, and I do act
like a tomboy. Most of all, though, I don't know what it's
like losing yourself every time you're splashed with water."
The tears methodically rolled down her face, to drip quietly
on the asphalt under her. In each tear, I almost saw a face:
Akane, then Shampoo, then Ukyou, and then myself. Those most
affected by the truth.
     "Akane, I have something I need to tell you.
Ranma said I would have to tell you in my own time, and this
is the time. I have been so foolish, and so cowardly up to
now." I was beginning to feel depressed.
     "Ryouga?" She looked up at me with those big
eyes, sparkling with her teardrops. "What is it?"
     "Akane. For almost as long as I've known you,
I've loved you. I lost that, now, but I can't think of a
better person than Ranma to love you. Even myself, I... I
took advantage of you."
     "How?" She looked at me, scanning me. "How,
Ryouga?"
     "P-chan. Akane. You can call me P-chan. That's
all I've been to you, a pig. I didn't tell you because I
wanted to be better than Ranma. I wanted to be closer to you
than he was." I looked at her, she was emotionless now. "I'm
going to go now. I'm sorry, Akane. I am very sorry."
************************************************************
     Ryouga was P-chan? The thought was impossible.
No one turns into a pig.... Unless. "Ryouga." He didn't stop.
"Ryouga, stop," I said, trembling. He stopped walking away.
     "Don't leave. Please. I don't want to lose you,
too."
     "A-Akane?" He turned back to face me. "You'll
forgive me?" There was hope in his eyes, I saw it.
     "Ranma said he was going to tell Ukyou. Then..."
I realized how hard this was for Ranma. "Then, he'll have no
friends left besides you. And neither will I." I stood up and
walked over to Ryouga. My legs trembled with every step.
Don't leave, please, I begged silently.
     He listened to my prayers, and let me hold him,
finally returning the embrace of friendship.
************************************************************
     I heard motion behind me, then in front of me.
It didn't register until I felt a head rest on my breast, and
arms hold on to me.
     "Ukyou help Shampoo?" A familiar voice whispered
to me, pleading, begging for assistance. "Shampoo no have
home now."
     I looked down at the source of the voice. Purple
hair splayed out over my chest and fell to the ground.
Shampoo's head was pressed against me, moving up and down
with her tear-filled breaths. Her arms wrapped around me, she
was using me as emotional support. Some support: I felt like
a tree ready to fall at the slightest wind.
     "Ukyou will help you, Shampoo." Maybe I had
something here. Just like Kasumi, who became the woman of the
house to shield herself against her loss, I could help
Shampoo through the loss of her life, and get through this
myself. "I'll help you." I finally said, and rested my head
on her shoulder.
     How stupid I was, I thought. Just moments ago, I
hated you, Shampoo. I thought you were just a bimbo and a
whore. How wrong I was.
     Finally, I helped her up, and we went back into
my humble home. I don't know how long she was crying, only
that she finally fell into a restful sleep in my arms. In the
last tear from her otherwise dried eyes, I could see images
as it traced her cheek: her childhood, under Cologne's
guidance, training to be the best warrioress and future
queen; her loss to Ranma as a girl, and subsequent vendetta;
falling into the cursed pools of Jujenkyo, her loss to Ranma
as a guy, and being bound by tradition; the first time she
realized she was in love with Ranma, Cologne's crazy plans to
engage the two, and finally, Ranma saying he loved Akane.
     She had lost more than the rest of us would.
That much I knew. She lost everything, her people, her
tradition, truly, she lost her life. All she had now, was my
house to sleep in, and any friends she could make. Right now,
that was me.
************************************************************
     I walked home. My gi was dirty, from the
pavement and from Ryouga's road dust. His hand clasped mine,
something I insisted upon to prevent him from getting lost
again. I hoped Ranma was home.
     He was. He saw us walk in, and looked hard at
Ryouga. "Does she know?"
     Soun and Genma looked up from their shogi match,
and stared at Akane and Ryouga. The two were of separate
emotions. My father was about ready to cry, again, while
Genma was venting anger into the air. It was palpable.
     I broke in. "That Ryouga is P-chan, yes."
Ranma's shoulders slumped forward when I said that..
************************************************************
     I saw Akane enter the house, holding Ryouga's
hand, and started fuming. First, the bastard blames me for
every problem in his life, now he ends up with Akane.
Probably hasn't told Akane that he's P-chan, and has been
sleeping in her bed almost every night that he's here. And
she calls me a hentai! "Does she know?" I asked Ryouga, my
voice was icy.
     Akane responded, "That Ryouga is P-chan, yes." I
was floored, and slumped forward. She forgave him, and she
likes him more than me. Why else would they be holding hands?
     There was an uncomfortable silence in the room,
Pops and Mr. Tendo were staring at Ryouga and Akane. No one
was talking. Finally, I spoke up, depressed.
     "Well, ji-san, I guess I'll have to marry Kasumi
or Nabiki, huh? After all, it looks like Akane found someone
else." Yeah, what a load of humor. What else could go wrong?
     "RANMA NO BAKA!" The familiar sound made me duck
and clasp my head for protection from the painful hammer. But
all I felt was a wish of air, before I heard a thumping
sound.
************************************************************
     I couldn't believe Ranma. What did he think
Ryouga and I were doing? And now he says he's going to marry
Nabiki or Kasumi! My eyes glazed over with blue chi, and I
reached back, the hammer was always there.
     Not this time. I swung forward with all my
might, and toppled helplessly to the ground. Where was the
hammer? What had happened?
     Ranma spoke first, "Akane? You OK?" He had his
hand extended to me, to help me up. I took it, but didn't
stand up.
     "What happened?" I asked, bewildered.
     "I don't know. You screamed at me and swung. I
ducked, and you fell over, because you were expecting to hit
me, but didn't connect."
     Suddenly, I remembered what I was mad at him
for. He thought I was in love with Ryouga, and he was going
to marry one of my sisters. Then, it dawned on me, he was
joking about marrying someone else. It was one of those guy
things that I always got mad at him for saying.
************************************************************
        "Baka," my former fiancee said in an almost playful
tone, "I'm not in love with Ryouga; I was just making sure he
made it here without getting lost." She let me help her up,
then whispered to me. "And I heard what you said to Shampoo,
too."
     I blanched. She heard that too? I was dead! My
mind started swarming with plans of escape. Unfortunately, I
couldn't concentrate on one long enough to see it to the end.
     Five whispered words wormed their way into my
panicked mind. I know no one else heard them, they were so
quite. "I love you too, baka!"
        It was her turn to help me off the ground. Maybe she
was my fiancee after all.
************************************************************
     I had been standing still, not wanting to lose
my way, even if it was for a five foot walk. I wouldn't leave
even to help Akane up, Ranma had already done that anyway.
"Ranma, I have a request to make of you," I began. "I would
like to call our duel off."
     "Ryouga?" He replied, confused. "Are you OK?"
     "Yes I am. Akane told me how mistaken I was to
continue to try to defeat you, even though you win every
fight. You have already won the duel many times over. I ask
your forgiveness for my stupidity."
     "On one condition, Ryouga."
     I couldn't believe him. I offer an apology, and
he expects a condition? "What is that?"
        "You quit sleeping with my fiancee." He grinned. I
could see why he got in trouble with Akane, but I also saw
the humor behind it, something Akane must have seen when her
hammer never appeared.
     Then, Akane spoke, sarcastically and friendly at
the same time. "RANMA!"
     "I agree, Ranma. A truce." We shook on the
truce, and looked to see Genma and Tendo dancing around,
their hands clasped around each other's shoulder.
************************************************************
     Where was I! I was in a bed, but it wasn't the
usual place I slept. I was on a small, soft bed. There was a
nice, actually rather pretty rug on the floor, decorated with
okonomiaki. This, this had to be Ukyou's room. What was I
doing here?
     I saw my clothes on the other end of the bed,
neatly laid out.
     "Hello, Shampoo." That was Ukyou.
     "U-Ukyou. Why Shampoo in Ukyou's bed?" I guess
asking wouldn't hurt. Though, I did cover myself more
carefully with the sheets.
     "After Ranma said he loved Akane, you ran away.
You ran into me, and started crying. I, well, I thought that
you didn't want to be left outside all night, so I took you
here." I saw she was trembling. "You just cried for at least
an hour, then fell asleep. I tried to make you a little more
comfortable, but you know, you're awfully heavy."
     "Ukyou help Shampoo? Why? She hate Shampoo for
trying to win Ranma."
     "I--I." She just looked at me really funny. "I
don't know why I helped you, Shampoo. I guess, once I had to
look past your wanting Ran-chan, and I guess it really was
love, not just some stupid law, you're a nice person. You
talk funny, but you're nice."
     "Ukyou?" I just tilted my head. "Thank you."
     We looked at each other for a long time, trying
to figure out what would happen.
     "Ukyou, Shampoo no can stay here. It not right.
Ukyou have hard time already."
     "Nonsense, Shampoo. Where else can you go?"
     "Shampoo live with Ran..." I couldn't live with
him. He didn't love me. "No, Shampoo go back to China," and I
never could return to my village: I wouldn't be accepted. I
didn't have anywhere else to go. Reservedly, I finally
accepted, "Shampoo stay here. But help with restaurant.
Shampoo insist."
     "I wonder what ramen and okonomiaki would be
like together...."
************************************************************
     I spent the night at the Tendo's residence.
Kasumi was a wonderful cook, and Ranma and I had a good laugh
over all the trouble my sense of direction caused. Akane
joined us later, and we all talked about where we would go
from here.
     You know, being friends with someone was a lot
nicer than being enemies.

-------------------------------------------------------------
Authors notes: (Yes, my little program works! :)
     Anyway, this story was the direct result of a little bit
of idea-block when trying to write a story centering on 'Poo.
Well, this was the end result, and it's not even finished.
     I have plans to continue this story, and delve into the
new friendship between Ukyou and Shampoo (who I hope to show
isn't just the worst qualities of Akane and Ukyou, but also
some of their best).
     Thanks go to Zen, my official pre-reader for this part,
and to Francis Gilbert, who also volunteered to pre-read for
me (don't worry, you'll still get future parts).
     Much thanks also to to Rumiko Takahashi, who created
Ranma 1/2, and could (as we all know) sue me into nothing
for copyright infringment. But, hopefully, she won't. :)
     Finally, thanks to WW, for maintaining this list, and
letting us all post there. Keep it up.
--
Ben Kosse bmk7411@cs.rit.edu
BGC Otaku and worshipper of the Red-Eyed Goddess. Member of ShAS.
Anime, RPG's, computers, poetry (read/write), music (listen/compose).
Author of the Bubblegum Crisis theme pack (see the homepage below).
Homepage with anime and other interests. (http://www.rit.edu/~bmk7411)