i hear you groaning, but since no one would write it
i decided i would.  seeing as this is sort of dragging
the joke out i understand if you're bored by these "real"
fics, so i won't feel bad if you just del this fic right
now.  in fact i expect that most of you will. ^_^

still here?

this fanfiction contains descriptions of sex and bestiality.
read it and see if you're insulted.  if you are, then you shouldn't
have read it.

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A Real Pig

------------------

When I saw Ranma defiling my sister so many years ago, something inside me
snapped.  All the things he's done to me, and he compounds the insult by
doing THAT with my own flesh and blood?  He had to pay, naturally.

I suppose people call me a pig because of my determined ways and refusal to
listen to their lies.  A male pig.  Hah.  They don't know the half of it.

After I saw Ranma doing that stuff, my sister came to me a few hours later.
She told me that I had better not even think about talking about it or she
would make my life a living hell in a thousand ways.  She said that once I
do it, I'll understand why people like it so much.

And that was that.

Ranma still had to pay.

------------------

I'm very very shy.  That's why I can't get any like Ranma.  But last week,
I struck gold.  And paid Ranma back in full.

There I was, sitting in the bathroom with Akane (outside the tub, mind
you) when suddenly she began rubbing herself up and down and moaning quietly.
I watched, mesmerized.  She muttered something about being stood up and
then intensified her efforts.  Sweet Akane doing this?  I couldn't believe
my pig eyes.

She let out a slight whimper and relaxed.  And I collapsed with blood pouring
from my nostrils.

------------------

I woke up in human form.  At first I was relieved, glad to be back to normal.
And then I saw scared fuckin' shitless.  Akane was sitting next to my naked
body just looking at me!  I probably would have gone under again had I not
lost so much blood already.

"A--Aka--no--let me expl--"

She put a finger to her lips to silence me.

"Ryoga...you naughty boy you!  Too bad for you," she stopped to
touch my nose affectionately, "I got stood up.  I really thought I
was going to have to be disappointed tonight."

Oh shit.  And she was right, Ranma hadn't done anything stupid tonight
so she hadn't reason to hit anything with the mallet.  And stupid me had
to come and take Ranma's place.

I cowered.  I whimpered.

"What are you scared of?  Not scared of these, are you?"  And she threw back
her robe and shook her breasts.

She was more experienced than I thought anyone as innocent as she had to have
been could be.  I can't remember how many times I thumped away at her.

------------------

Now at night when Ranma's asleep, Akane gets a kettle for "P-chan."  We do it
in her room.  Sometimes when she's tired she just leaves me in pig form and
lets me pleasure her manually and orally under the covers.

One day I'm gonna rub this in Ranma's face.  After I'm sure I can beat him.

Thuh'End

As you can see, this isn't a very good or developed story, just an idea put
into a prose form.  I'm hoping someone (perhaps the author) will write a side
story that's actually good, using this idea.

^_^

See ya!