Revenge is Celluloid
by James Stone
stoner@elycion.geology.ualberta.ca
(c) 1996 Stone Age Productions All Rights Reserved
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Why not? Seems to be a popular idea, and being behind the trend has never
bothered me....;>
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"Round and round and round we go...we're coming to fucking get you!!!"
-Jesse Dupree, Saugerties NY, August 12, 1994
Darkness.
Thunder rolled in the skies over Nerima, thick black clouds
penetrated and lit by flashes of lightning, explosive bolts of
destructive energy. The storm was unusually large for this time of
year, all the moreso because it wasn't bringing the expected
concentration of rain along with it. While black and menacing with
moisture, the clouds held it in, and merely buffeted the streets and
houses below with hurricain force winds.
A meterologist in a faceless building somewhere away from the
storm noted the phenomenon with some surprise. It was, he would mark on
his little notepad later, an 'extraordinaliry discliplined weather
pattern', confining itself to only a small part of the massive
Tokyo-Yokohama metropolis. In fact, the meterologist noted, 90% of the
storms fury was concentrated a short distance from the main airport, in
the Nerima Ward. It was, he went on to note, unusually violent for the
time of year, and exhibited an unusual degree of electrical activity.
Beyond that, he made no note. Weather is a strange beast at the best of
times, and meterologists see many strange things.
In the Nerima Ward itself, the lightning continued to flash,
ear-splitting waves of thunder wracking senses already deafened by
howling winds. A lot lay at the very center, larger and older than its
neighbours. The main building in the lot was a two-story
house of traditional design, its wide-flaring roof designed to withstand
the force of a typhoon. Beside it was a building of similar design, but
only one story. The storm shifted slightly, almost imperceptably,
sliding its center over this second building, as if sensing prey.
In the second building, were two people. One was a young man, a
boy still, really, although his size and fitness would throw some. His
hair was long and black, and tied off into a single braided pigtail. He
was wearing a red shirt, with the sleeves removed, and loose black
pants. Black slippers clad his feet. He stood in a combat crouch,
facing his opponent, wary for an attack.
His opponent was a girl. She was a great deal short than he
was, with her black hair cut off short in the back. She was in a
traditional martial arts 'gi', yellow-white in color, and tied off with a
red belt. Her feet were bare. She too, stood in a combat crouch, tense,
waiting.
Ranma looked up at the ceiling. "Oh no you don't, you bastard," he
muttered. "Not this time."
Seeing his sudden diversion, Akane relaxed her stance. "What is it,
Ranma?"
Grimly, Ranma replied. "It's _him_."
Horrifed, Akane gasped! "No! It...it can't be! Not him again! I
thought he was leaving us alone for awhile!"
Shaking his head, Ranma smirked bitterly. "You think he'd ever let
us go, Akane? We're _special_ to him. No matter how often he goes away,
he'll always be back. Unless we stop him. Now. Tonight."
Bewildered, Akane looked at him. "Stop him? How?"
Ranma held out a small jeweled ring. "It's this. Cologne gave it to
me when we were at the Nekohanten earlier. She said she sensed him coming
again, and that this would take us to him." He smiled nastily. "And when we
got there, we'd be able to take care of him once and for all."
"Really? How do you use it? When will we go?"
Ranma looked taken aback. "She...didn't say."
Akane looked at him, dumbfounded. "You don't know?"
Ranma shook his head.
"And you didn't ask?" Another headshake.
"Ranma....YOU IDIOT!!!"
Akane's cry was suddenly cut short, as a bolt of pure energy blew a
ragged hole in the roof, reaching directly for Akane. To Ranma, the whole
world shifted into slow motion as he watched the lightning bolt rip the air
apart, superenergized air molecules forced into plasma, all of it headed directly for Akane....
And the bolt, less than a foot from her head, suddenly changed
course, and instead rushed into the ring he was holding, and the whole world
became light.
In a mountainside temple several hundred kilometers away, a small red
gem, which served as a single earring for a dilenquent exploded, enveloping
the delinquent and all those near her in it's radius....
In the Jyuban district of Tokyo five young girls in short skirts
vanished in a glowing ball of energy as the cresent-shaped rod their leader
held over head showered them with silver light....
On a distant planet, two lovely young ladies were sucked into the
screen of the terminal they were viewing....
In the Dark, a young princess and her mute, yet faithful retainer
softly vanished from that world of demon-gods, to appear in one far more
dangerous....
In several other small communities throughout Japan brief surges
of energy went unnoticed by local residents, and the people nearest the
center of them vanished as well....
In a fourth-floor apartment in northen Canada, a young man looked in
shock at the words that were writing themselves across his screen. "Aw
shit..."
A loud explosion shook the building, although Stoner had no doubt that
none of the other tenants, or even his sleeping roommate would notice. He
checked his watch...sure enough, nulltime. This was private, between him and
them. No doubt he wasn't the first visitor on their list...no doubt he
wouldn't be their last. Still, that wasn't going to be much consolation.
Picking himself up heavily, the young man made his way out of his
bedroom, and too the living room. He paused a moment, surveying the faces
before him, registering some mild surprise at some of the ones he saw there.
He certainly had sown his wild oats far and wide, hadn't he? Clearing his
throat, he began. "Ahem. Well, Since you all decided to show up in person,
I won't go through all the formalities of naming you all."
He leaned against the wall, trying to maintain his composure. "So, I
guess this is all part of that Revenge thing then?"
Ranma was the first to step forwards. "You bet this is revenge!
When I think of what you've put me through..."
Stoner tried to look innocent. "What I put you through? Tsk. I
don't recall ever doing anything to you _personally_...unless you're still
holding a grudge over that whole "Tsunami Wave" thing." He smirked. "You're
_so_ cute when you're running in terror from cats, you know that?"
Ranma raised a fist, trembling with rage. "Shut up, you perverted
bastard!" Stoner look taken aback..._him_, perverted? Ranma's eyes
narrowed. "Or did you forget about Chinese Dreams?"
Stoner went pale. "Uh...hey, now, c'mon...don't take it personally
and all...I mean...it's just an idea, right? Okay, so the Guide might not be
the most _attractive_ guy in the world, but...well, the other part...you
can't say you wouldn't have done that on your own?" Stoner yelped and tried
to duck, but missed as Ranma's fist caught him and threw him back into the
hallway.
Ranma took another step forwards, but Akane moved quicker, putting
her hand on his chest. "My turn now," she smiled unpleasantly. Stoner
groaned. He had been hoping to save this one for the last.
"Sticking me in occupied France to live like an animal, frying me
alive with a monster lightning bolt, getting me drunk out of my tree,
conspiring to marry me off YET AGAIN to Ranma, and repeatedly publicly
threatening to kill me in the most exruciating way you could imagine." At
each charge, Stoner winced. "That's it...for now. This is to make sure you
never try any of it again." With that, the girl landed a well aimed kick
into the young authors sternum.
Blearily, he looked up. Hikaru Hiyama stood above him now, crying
angrily. "You...you killed me! TWICE!" *WHAP*, and he was sent spinning
across the room to be caught in long, strong, blue-robed arms.
"Conspiring to make a fool of me," came the soft giggle above him.
"Larva!" the voice commanded. With a sweeping gesture, the name "STONER"
burst into flame on the curtains across the room. Stoner winced; without
those his apartment was gonna be hell on sunny days. Then he forgot all
about the curtains has mystical lines of energy picked up up and suspended
him in the air.
They were very orderly about he, he thought in the paze-induced haze.
Each character took their place in line, and waited for their turn to
strike him. Those with repeated grievances then got back into the
line...those who were finished stood to the side and made helpful
suggestions. After hours of this abuse, the names and faces all blended into
each other, but a few stood out...the Sailor Senshi, excepting Usagi, for
their violent deaths, Sailor Moon for the grief she went through in Dirty
Moon, Kei and Yuri for having been paired opposite the Sailor Senshi, Madoka
for being turned into a Shinma. On and on it went, until finally Akane, the
most oft-abused character, finished the night's proceedings with a
forceful statement to his Lemon works. With any luck, she hoped, he wouldn't
be thinking about writing those again anytime soon.
Quietly, Miyu went around to each character, and handed him or her a
small talisman. Giggling again, the high-toned sound echoing around the
room, she gestured delicately, and each of the characters vanished, some
taking the chance to lob one last verbal abuse at Stoner. Lastly, without a
word or a backwards look, Miyu and Larva vanished into the dark. With their
departure, the force lines disappeared, and Stoner collapsed to the floor...
injuries gone, but the pain remaining.
Chuckling weakly, Stoner began to crawl back to his bedroom...
"Like....like that'll stop me," he wheezed. "Advantage of writing slow...
I've always got reserve energy...."
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Well, that sucked. ^_^ But what the hey, what do you expect for 45 minutes
work? War and Peace? ;> Some of the refs in here are really obscure, bonus
points to whoever figures them all out (especially the Modoka as a Shinma
one! And those who I've actually _told_ outright, you don't count. :P)
Until the next time (Really Soon Now)
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James Stone - stoner@elycion.geology.ualberta.ca
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http://elycion.geology.ualberta.ca/~stoner
http://elycion.geology.ualberta.ca/~stoner/amuck/amuck.html
http://elycion.geology.ualberta.ca/~stoner/fotw/flags
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Akane@Anime, Ukyou@Ranma, Stoner@Baka, Nabiki@Furtoonia, Geobaldi@Furry,
Mendo@AMUSH, Kylania@Delusions, Mousse@Avalon, Nanami@Fiction,
Noa@DahlingMUCK, Baradagi@ElseMUCK, Miki@ShojoMUCK, Karin@PikuMUCK
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