Ano... here I am, on the bandwagon again. ^^;;; I'd like to preface this
with a statement: This isn't very good, it's just an idle attempt at this,
I'm not good at this sorta stuff...  ^^;;;;
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

     Kevin sat at his desk, wrapped up in his blanket, staring at a
blank text-editor.  "Damn.. I *know* there's stuff running around
inside my head, I just gotta be able to write *something* today.
Hmm... Strange Days? Loader's been gettin' on my case about it.. Naw.
Can't do anything on Converging Series, it's outta my hands for
now... Hmm. Well, I'll check my email, maybe it'll give me some
inspiration."  So saying, he double-clicked on an innocuous little
icon. "Ah.. PC-Pine.. old friend. Tell me, what's in store for me
now?"*  
  
     After much whirring and delay, his mail was retrieved. "Damn..
@.o 100+ messages. I *gotta* leave some of those mailing lists I'm
on... someday."  Click. Click-click. 'd' 'd' 'd' 'd' "Whoops! What's
this? Sauce..?"  Kevin reads the 'fic with much interest, chuckling. 
"Evil. Truly evil. Ah well, such is 'ficdom, never know what's gonna
happen next."  There was a sudden, polite tap on his shoulder.  Kevin
didn't even turn around, "Yeah, what is it, Mom? I already mowed the
lawn, and I'm busy."

     The voice that responded certainly wasn't his mother's.  

     "Oh, yes, been quite the busy man, haven't we?"  

     Kevin froze. He *knew* that voice. "Mom?"

     "Not quite. Stand up and turn around."  Kevin obeyed, his stomach
sinking down through his body and about six feet into the ground.
With a slow, and I mean *slow*, pivot, he turned to face the voice.
"Oh... *no*.. Nononono..."  Kevin had turned very, very pale.

     "Oh, yes, yes, yes."  A young man filled Kevin's view. 

     <Black hair.  Pigtail. Red Chinese shirt. Black pants, slippers.
Oh NO. Nonono.. this isn't happening, my mind only thinks it's
happening.>

     From out of nowhere, a dimly-lit portal opened, while Kevin was
in the midst of gaping. To his utter shock, and horror (he would
admit, upon recollection of the event, although he was simply in shock
at the moment and nothing was really getting through,) a girl in a
blue and white school uniform stepped through, mallet on one shoulder,
bucket in the other.  "Oi, Ranma! Did we get the right one?"

     Ranma turned around, "Hai, Akane, we got the right one."

     Kevin spoke up in his most commanding, powerful voice.  He
squeaked, "Ano... what... what.. what is going on???"

     Ranma grinned. "Oh, you don't know?"

     Kevin shook his head frantically, wondering if he could get off
on a plea of ignorance.

     Ranma just pointed to the screen.

     "Wha--..." Kevin got those big eyes.. "Sauce.. of course..." he
said, weakly.  "I don't suppose you're gonna let me off easy..."

     This time, it was Akane who answered. "Easy? Easy?!? You *killed*
me with cancer and made me *die* in Ranma's dreams!!"

     "Hey!! I was in a bad way that time."

     "Didn't have to take it out on me, ya know. :P Not to *mention*
what you have planned for me in that *other* story." Akane scowled,
and raised the bucket.
 
     *gulp* "Er.. I don't have a say in this, do I? .. Wait a
minute.. Other story? What other... *pale* But wait!! Wait! I haven't 
gotten that far, and besides, I make it all right in the end!"

     Ranma smirked. "Not a chance. Akane, take him."  Akane nodded
grimly, and stepped forward. "Get *me* caught in Maoniichuan, will
you? Kill *me* off with cancer, will you?"

     "Heyheyheywaitaminutewouldya! Can I at least get away from my
computer?"  Akane nodded, reluctantly, and Kevin took ten steps to the
left, then stood, resignedly. "Ok, go for it."  Then his eyes widened. 
"Oh.. my... @.@" Standing right behind Ranma and Akane was a familiar
black-haired figure, dressed similarly to Ryouga, but with wire-frame
glasses and a blue-bead bracelet on his right wrist. "Oh my," was all
that would come out of Kevin's mouth.  The figure just nodded silent
agreement with Akane and suddenly, it was too late.

     *splash*

     @.@ o.o -.- o.o @.@ 

     "This is.. different than I'd expected.. @.@" said Kevin-chan. He
turned around for a moment, and checked. "Oh, god.. I think I'm gonna
faint...." 

     Ishido spoke up. "Quick, someone catch her!"

     Ranma said, "I'll catch you!" He formed a ring with his arms,
which Kevin promptly slipped through and onto the floor. "Oops,
sorry." He hmmmmm'ed, then laid Kevin out on the nearby bed, after
clearing several role-playing game books off it. "God, what a *mess*!"

     Akane leaned back through the portal. "Okay, guys and gals, all
clear."  With that, four hardsuits, the Masaki household (and guests),
an Iczelion, and the cast of Converging Series walked in. Somehow, the
room fit all of them comfortably.

   [Much, much later...]

     "Wake up, Sleeping Beauty."  This was from Childra.  It
definitely got Kevin awake. "Wha..?"  As his... sorry.. *her* eyes
fell upon the buxom blonde, she gasped. "You!!"  Then Ratiko, Ryo
Saotome, and Miyabi stepped out from behind Childra.

     "Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!! This *can't* be happening!!" Kevin was
frantic.  She looked around him, and found herself surrounded by
several characters, none of which looked particularly *happy* to see
her there. 

     The muzzle of a blue armcannon was shoved into her face. *gulp*
"Um... hello, Miss Asagiri." 

     "Hello? Hello?? Is *that* all you have to say for yourself, You
little bastard.. why I oughta..."  Ranma commented mildly, "Now, now,
Priss, you know we're not allowed to kill her. Unfortunately." 

     "People people! He--she-- didn't do *just* bad things, you know."
This came from Childra, who was effectively wrapped around Ishido, not
that Ishido minded any.  Akane turned around and began to argue with
Childra, rather loudly. While the others tried to separate the two, who
were currently discussing the 'goodness' of Kevin's writings, Priss was
idly amusing herself by firing shots *just* to the left and right of
her. The sound of the armcannon was drowned out by the shouting,
unfortunately for her. 

     Eventually, after the bed had been shot out from underneath him,
the group got Childra and Akane under control.  They decided to hold an
impromptu 'trial' to discuss his faults.  Kevin felt incredibly doomed.
As doomed as if she'd written a bad thing to be done to Urd.. which she
hadn't, thankfully, so at least there weren't any goddesses here.

     "Priss, you're first.  Why are you here?" Akane, with her mallet,
had been decided to be the judge, naturally.

     Priss shot Kevin the kind of glare which melted blast doors and
sat upon the 'stand', which really was the couch. "Well, *gag* Your
Honor, it goes like this:She had some really nasty things planned for
me and the Knight Sabers." 

     Akane felt sort of sorry for the pathetic looking figure slumped
between Iczelion and Wasyuu, so she decided to stick up for her.
"But he hasn't released any 'fics to the FFML with... oh, wait,
nevermind, there was that one, right?" 

     With a nod, Priss said, "Yes, that's the one.  I'm speaking for
the Tenchi cast, the Bubblegum Crisis cast, Iczelion... we're *all*
pissed off."  Akane nodded, thinking <Poor boy. He should learn that
imagination *will* get the better of him.> "Very well, what did he have
planned?"

     Priss shot to her feet, waving her arms wildly as she shouted.
Characters dove for cover whenever the armcannon was pointed their way.
"He was gonna trap us in a different world! Hell, he did it already!
And he was gonna send us up against huge robots... ten foot tall
powerarmors with railguns as long as I am tall.. Predators.. Aliens..
he was gonna get Tenchi nearly killed, and he was bringing Kagato
back.. giving Largo access to *really* high-tech stuff, stuff we
wouldn't have had access to.."  The evil glare was fully fixed on Kevin
now, and she shrunk back, looking about mouse-sized.

     "Right, then, time for my grievances." Akane hopped away from the
judge's desk, as it were, and took her place on the stand. "First off--
he *killed* me, in that horribly depressing story of his.  *Killed* me,
with cancer!!" Akane's blue aura rose, and it was not good for Akane's
blue aura to appear. She ranted some more. "Then.. then... he was
gonna have that guy Herb kidnap me! And dip me in Maoniichuan!! How'm I
supposed to get close to R.. er.. I mean, how dare he?!?!? Who *knows*
what else he's got stuffed in that head of his!"

     And so, the little inquest continued, Kevin growing smaller and
smaller.  In the end, it was decided that something would have to be
done.  "Right then, time for a little payback." Ranma grinned, and an
audible *gulp* was heard from the writer's corner. "First off, you'll
have to get used to having us around.. this is gonna take a while.
Priss wants first crack--so, let her at the computer, and, meanwhile,
I'm hungry, so let's see what you got to eat. Akane, too, I guess, that
tomboy eats too much for--*WHAM*" 

     "RANMA!!!!" Akane did *not* look pleased.

     "Itee!  It was a joke, Akane, a joke!" 

     *WHAMWHAMWHAMWHAMWHAM*

     "Gee, Akane, breakfast today must be slowin' you down, you're
moving as fast as lead!" Ranma laughed, dodging strikes easily, while
Priss typed away at the computer. The resulting holes in the floor and
walls didn't do a thing for the decor of Kevin's basement.  

     Kevin winced, and sighed.. <This is gonna be a *long* lifetime...>
She muttered a Chinese saying, "May you have an interesting life,"
wryly, as he searched for hot water.

                      -*{THE END? Yeah, probably.}*-


Kevin Eav--First Deacon of the Church of Ryouga, Keeper of the Compass,
                          Member of C.A.S.K.E.T.
email:geist@holly.colostate.edu -- Ishido@ManyMU*, Manynames@ManyMU*S
"The world...is a dark and lonely place...beyond hope, beyond care..."-Ryouga
                 Member of Okonomiyaki Addicts Anonymous
"C'mon kiddo.  You've got to *find* Akane.  You really are a pain in the
                 fanny sometimes, ya know, Ryouga?"-Ukyou