Bernard L. Ward verbalized:
--=====================_842815390==_
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Well, here's the fifth installment of Magical Girl Fanfic Theater! Again,
please reply to falcon@best.com, not eagleman@best.com. I'm only using
eagleman to post stories/fanfic reviews from since cut-and-paste into a
shell session doesn't always work out with the larger articles.
- Miyakawa Mika as Exquisite Soldier Lovely Freesia
- Toriyama Akiko as Exquisite Soldier Crimson Rose
- Mura Natsumi as Exquisite Soldier Golden Poppy
- Ferris as Exquisite Soldier Pretty Daisy
- and Penko as herself
Tonight's Feature Presentation: Tenchi Muyo! Bug Bash - chapter 2
by AlberCrombie
[It was a quiet evening...]
[The lights come up in the now-familiar holovid theater. While
Penko sits in one of the front row seats, Mika, Akiko, and Natsumi
scurry around the theater laying down items at various places.]
[Penko]
Girls! We're starting!
[Mika]
Okay! We're almost done!
[The three girls quickly finish up and head back for their seats.]
[...things were calm...]
[Mika]
I'm Miyakawa Mika!
[Akiko]
I'm Toriyama Akiko!
[Natsumi]
I'm Mura Natsumi!
[The back door bursts open and Ferris comes rushing in holding a small
package.]
[Ferris]
And I'm Ferris!
[Mika]
Welcome to Magical Girl Fanfic Theater! In case you're wondering,
we were preparing for gophers because we're reviewing part two of
"Tenchi Muyo! Bug Bash", and we had problems with a certain rodent
the last time we reviewed this fanfic series, right girls?
[....little did they know...]
[Akiko and Natsumi]
Right!
[Ferris]
Sorry for being a little late, but my cousin in America sent me
this package for the occasion...
[Ferris tears open the package and takes out a book. She holds it up
to the camera and the title reads, "1001 Ways to Cook Up a Gopher and
Other Forms of Roadkill".]
[Ferris, grinning evilly]
Cousin Madara tells me that gophers make for good eating!
[...that their preperations would come back to haunt them.
AHAHAAHAHAH*AHEM* Sorry.]
[Mika]
I'm sure they would for you cat people. You might want to watch
what you say around this particular gopher, though. He has a way of
twisting people's words around.
[Ferris]
So I saw from the archived footage. Talk about fresh!
[Mika]
At any rate, we've covered the theater with all sorts of gopher traps
in anticipation of the little pest. And now, on with the show!
[The lights dim back down and the fanfic starts playing on the holovid
screen.]
[Unbeknownst to the patrons of the theater, a small mount of dirt appeared
in the back of the auditorium on the floor. Next to it was a small hole,
steadily growing larger by the moment. Silent sounds of digging could be
heard, had anyone bothered to pay attention.]
-----
Tenchi Muyo! Bug Bash
by AlberCrombie (gopher@venus.net)
Chapter Two
Skuld's head peaked around the corner and surveyed the destruction;
nobody in the room but a passed out blue-haired female on the remains of a
couch. Suddenly, the goddess bounced around the corner. She stood in the
middle of the remains of the Masaki sun-room with mallet in hand, bug
hunting glasses on, a wicked smaile on her young face, and murder in her
heart. It was party time.
-----
[Mika]
"Peaked"? Maybe that should be "peeked", since that's what she was
doing. I also think she would have a "smile" instead of a "smaile"
on her face.
[Akiko]
By the way, I suspect that's the same look you'll have on your face
if that perverted rodent shows his around here, Mika.
[Mika]
You got that right!
[There was a slight scuffing to the far side of theater. Mika barely
registered it. She listened, then convincing herself it was nothing -
ignored it.]
-----
"Alright bugs!" Skuld raised her mallet over her head as in
defiance, "Your fuzzy butts are mine!" She dropped into a hunters crouch and
began to scower the room, looking for anything that needed a good bopping.
-----
[Akiko]
Maybe "scower" should be replaced with "search". I don't think
"scower" is the right way to spell it, but "scour" sounds like she's
cleaning the room, not searching it.
I was looking for a stronger word than 'search' - something to imply that
she was going through everything thorowly(sp?). But maybe 'scour' was the
wrong word.
[Mika]
It's "Schwarzenegger", if it'll help. By the way, I noticed that
Belldandy's spelled correctly now. Nice to know that we're being of
some help to that little pervert, and no, I *don't* mean that kind of
help.
-----
[Mita paused after her statement - why had she but in that last comment?
She had never associated 'help' to that 'sense' of the word -- at least not
that quickly.]
[Ferris]
"must be appears to be"? What kind of phrase is that? Choose one
or the other!
It means I wrote it one way, changed it, and didn't get it all cleared out
the second time. opps. Supposed to be' appears to be waking...'
[Mika]
Be careful, Ferris! He might interpret that to mean choosing one of
us!
[Was paranoia setting in? She wasn't sure.]
[Ferris]
Oh, yeah, that's right! Judging from the footage from last time, he'd
probably choose you because of that costume of yours...
[Mika]
You just had to go and remind me, didn't you, Ferris?
[Mika unconsciously straightened what little there was of her costume.]
[Akiko]
Yup, Kikuchi Masami did the voices for both. I have to wonder if
Tokimi will make an appearance since Tooma Yumi did the voices for
both her and Urd as well. Interesting coincidence, ne?
Keiichi and Tenchi?I didn't know that - cool! Tooma Yumi? I'm drawing a
blank.
[Mika]
Maybe that should be "Tenchi, get over here and help!". Unless she
really meant for Tenchi to climb over Ryoko...
Ok - point taken.
[Akiko]
Knowing our friend, the gopher, it may very well be a possibility.
Right, Natsumi?
[Why did she suddenly feel as if she was being watched? She shivered, but
it was not from the artic theater air.]
[Akiko]
Let me handle this, Mika. Natsumi, both the boy and his sword are
named "Tenchi". The gopher made it pretty clear in that paragraph,
and so has the anime. Get it?
Thanks - I really tried to explain this for the non-Tenchi readers out
there. I knew it was vitally important that this point was made crystal
clear.
[Akiko, sighing]
That, we don't know yet. Just sit back and watch the fanfic, okay?
[Natsumi, smiling brightly]
Okay!
[Akiko suddenly flashed back to an old animated movie called, 'Wizards' -
where Avatar tells the the Fariey Princess to, 'just set there for a while I
think it over.' Same empty expression.]
[Akiko]
And I don't think Aeka would simply call Ryoko a "hooligan". "Demon"
or "monster" would be more her style.
First - it's variety, second it seems like something a smug, princess type
personage would say. She looks down on Ryoko, so why not?
[Mika]
Again, Mihoshi is reminding me of a certain someone on our team...
[Natsumi]
Who? You never told us last time, Mika!
[Mika, muttering]
Never mind, you ditz....
[Was that movement in the corner?]
They boys landed less than a meter away from Skuld just as she
struck the bug on the control cube. She flattened not only the bug, but the
cube as well. Suddenly, an explosion and glaring white light errupted from
ground zero, engulfing Skuld, Tenchi, and Keiichi.
Washu skidded to a halt and hid her eyes from the explosion.
"TENCHI!!!!"
As Washu peered through the settling dust, she could make out the
robed, mallet weilding form of Skuld standing at ground zero, coughing on
all the dust. Then she spotted a second silouete(sp?) lying on the ground,
it was Tenchi...or maybe it was Keiichi. Who was it, she wasn't sure
because the dust was so thick.
Then it hit her, the dust may be thick, but she could make out the
shapes of two of the victims. But where was the third? And Who was it?
End Chapter 2
-----
[Mika]
Okay! We need a head count here! According to the last paragraph,
there were three victims, but I thought I counted four people
involved, not including Washu.
Ok - I guess I didn't make it clear. Washuu is standing about where Mihoshi
is (who is still lying on the ground), while Skuld is at the center of the
blast, leaving Tenchi and Keiichi unaccounted for. Then you add in one
vauge image in the dust.....
Slight re-write needed here, obviously.
[Natsumi, sobbing]
I'm confused again....
[Mika, sighing]
Don't worry, we're not mad at you this time. It's not your fault.
[Natsumi, drying her tears]
Really? You mean it?
[Mika]
Sure. You're a ditz at times, but if the rest of us are confused,
then it's probably not your fault.
[Mika caught a shadow out of the corner of her eye. When she turned to
look, there was nothing there. What was going on, she wondered?]
[Mika]
Good night everyone! Remember, do your part to keep gophers under
control!
[They all turned to watch the credits scroll across the screen when the
entire theater started to shake like a violent earthquake. What was
happening? Would it effect the showing of Chapter 3 of Bug Bash? Could the
Gopher be behind it?
Probably.]
AlberCrombie
-- who intends to put chapter 3 out very soon and also answer the question
'what the hell is going on in the theather'.