An interesting little tale but...

It just seemed to be so uninvolving, so lacking in emotion - not once did 
you give the impression that the characters actually cared about what was 
going on.

And as a parody... it worked hard at stealing elements from assorted 
"Darkfic's", but didn't really do anything with them.  1 or 2 quick 
one-liners do not make a story into a comedy.

Technically well done, this story was overall... disappointing.  I could 
see what you were aiming for but somehow (for me at least) you missed.  
The story just seemed to lack the zest and inspiration that most of your 
work displays...  there was no Power in your words.

Ah well... maybe next time.
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"The Major"                     |  "Funny Games, Strange Cartoons, Confusing
David Bateson                   |     Computers and too many Books!  No 
                                |     wonder you're weird."
major@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au     |       - My Sister.
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