Because you'll have to clean it up? But I WANT to leave a mess... He
deserves to be left in a mangled bloody pulp!

Then use a blender instead of a rusty razor.  Much messier.  Keeps the
cannibals happy too(no tetanus to worry about).

Hmmm... I know! I can use BOTH at once while keeping him alive! Start
blending his feet after I use the blade on his torso or something... let
the cannibals eat him from feet up...?

Kun-chan...