You wrote: 

Richard,

<snip>

I know professional
writers who have labored for years to be able to write like this, and who
say it never comes easily for them.

Hell, I know someone *very personally* who
wishes that she could turn out fics of this 
quality.

Any quibbles along the lines of "I
don't know if Kuno would act like that" or "Is Nabiki really _that_ 

mature?"

are pretty minor in the face of good writing like this.  This Nabiki and
this Kuno are like that because you made them yours for this story and 

made

me like it.  Good on ya', mate.

Totally agreed upon.  In fact, because you
decided to take them on a different turn from
the way that all the other writers decided
to do, I wonder if there should even be a "fan"
in front of the word fiction.  As some one
pointed out about a story someone else had done,
(details of who said what are sketchy)
"Take out the references to anime and
this could stand alone as a piece of fiction."

Oh yeah, and as for the lemon bits: will... realistic, extremely 

realistic.

Perhaps too realistic for erotica, 

Read my comment on it somewhere before
yours.  To recap, the best erotica isn't
erotic at all.

Personally, I think you should post it along with the other TIL stories.

Agreed upon. 

Best,

Bob Barnes
rbarnes@moscow.com
Moscow, Idaho

Foxtrot the Furryous, BTFH