The characters abused in this story are copyright to whoever owns them
(not me) etc, etc, etc.
I can be reached at bstallin@eagle1.eaglenet.com for abuse, flame,
praise (yeah, right), or whatever.
This story is dedicated to Rob who encouraged me in this doubtful
venture, Stew, who was my best
 friend for three and a half years in Hell 985 (write me or something -
I don't have your address!), 
and the guy who first recommended Ranma1/2 to me at the comic book store
in Singapore whose 
 face is crystal clear, but whose name eludes me. 



Urotsukidoji 1/2
Curse of the Overfiancee

by Boris

The rain poured down, thouroughly soaking Nerima. Crashes and screams
could be heard 
above the downpour, though, and most of Nerima's citizens hid inside and
locked their doors. 
A huge tentacled monster ripped through the wall of a restaurant,
tossing aside furniture and 
crushing the few patrons like paper dolls. Cologne gasped and bounded
out the back of the 
Nekohanten, dragging her great-granddaughter behind. 'The old legend
says it was dead!' 
Cologne thought. 'Our great ancestors drowned it 3000 years ago - how
can it be back?!'
Mousse turned at the sound of destruction. "Ranma Soatome, how dare you
do such a terrible 
thing to my beloved's restaurant! I will make you regret everything
you've done to poor Shampoo, then 
I will be her fiancee! But first I will put on my glasses, so I can see
your demise clearly!" From 
one of his mysterious sleeves, Mousse produced a pair of glasses.
Putting on them on, he stared 
at the monster, facefaulting. 'Oh shit!  Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh
shit!' went his final thoughts.

Tentacles reached out and grabbed Mousse's arms and legs, pulling him in
all directions at 
once. Most of Mousse's secret weapons were useless, his arms and legs
pinned firmly by the 
tentacles, but he valiantly used the flail he kept hidden in his hair,
wielding it in his mouth and 
swinging his neck around, although the monster barely seemed to notice.
It would have 
appeared to be searching to anyone foolish enough to stand and watch.
Apparently giving up, 
the monster snaked another tentacle around Mousse's head and pulled with
all tentacles at 
once. A wet ripping sound marked Mouse's passing.

 The monster continued on its search, leaving a twisted wake of
destruction. Suddenly, the 
monster stopped; it had found what it sought. 


Earlier, Hiromi had been wandering the streets of Nerima alone. Now that
her father was gone, 
she had only one hope: she must find the man her father had arranged for
her to marry. I must 
find Ranma Saotome. 

By now, it was past nine at night, and overcast, but Hiromi bravely
continued on. She had 
found his house, but his mother had said that he hadn't been home in
months, and that she 
should try the Cat Cafe. A boy her age who had been walking in the park
said 
Ranma was staying at the Tendo Dojo, but his directions had been very
confusing. Then it 
started to rain. 

'Oh, no!' she thought to herself. 'Not this, not now! I was so close!'
Her body warped and grew, ripping her clothes to shreds. Tentacles by
the dozens erupted from 
various parts of her body, and sharp fangs grew from her mouth. Towering
over twelve feet tall, 
Hiromi began to cry, but what came out sounded more like bellows of
rage. That had been her 
favorite blouse. Worse than that, when she finally switched back, she
would be naked.


The first change had been the worst. 

Her father had just met with Ranma's father and everything had been set
up. No longer would 
she have to admire him practicing in his back yard from her bedroom
window, across the 
street. To celebrate, her father had taken her to China to see the
Enchanted Ponds. (Or 
something like that. She had never really paid attention in Chinese
class). 

There had been fewer tourists there than they expected, but they set up
their picnic lunch 
anyway. Just as they had started eating, a fat chinese man in a tour
guide's uniform ran towards 
them, shouting hysterically.
"You no can eat picnic here! This is famous Training Ground of Cursed
Springs, JUSENKYO! 
There are more than one hundred springs here, and each one have own
tragic story!"
Hiromi laughed at the man; she had been truly ecstatic then, newly
engaged, without a care in 
the world. Just then, a bee buzzed angrily at her and flew at her. Her
mother had died of a bee 
sting, and Hiromi knew that she, too, was allergic to the venomous
sting. 

Screaming, she started running, and the bee chased her all over
Jusenkyo, with her father and 
the fat guide alternately swatting the bee and grabbing her hand
whenever she went too close to 
a pool. Finally, the bee chased her away from the springs and into a
huge thorny bush.

Where she landed with a splash in the pool that had been underneath.

The last words she heard were the tour guide saying, "Hey! I did not
know we had pool there! I 
wonder if it has a curse..."


Inside a warm cozy room, Serena lay on her bed reading the an old Maison
Ikkoku manga. She 
sniffled a bit, but refrained from the waterworks romantic stories
usually brought, much to the 
relief of Luna, currently laying on the floor by Serena's bed half
asleep dreaming about chasing 
Negamice. 'It's so tragic that they won't just tell each other how they
feel,' she said to herself. 
'I'm so glad I have Darien. I wish he would come by now and -'

CRASH! Serena's fantasy was interrupted suddenly as her bedroom window
shattered inward. 
Standing in her room was a hideous creature, so tall it had to crouch to
fit in the room, with 
huge fangs and too many tentacles to count.


Hiromi watched as the girl stared back wide-eyed in amazement. She
reached out to gag her 
victim, and the Serena's scream became a muffled grunt. She had intended
to use her huge 
clawed hand, but instead, a thick tentacle had slammed into this poor
girl's mouth. No matter, 
so long as she's quiet.

Hiromi proceeded to tear apart Serena's dresser, sending clothes flying
everywhere, finally 
selecting a skirt and blouse that would probably fit, and a pair of nice
shoes. Eying her victim 
who was still faintly struggling, she spotted one of the hand woven
friendship bracelets that 
were so popular. Another tentacle reached out and wrapped itself around
the bracelet and 
yanked. Hiromi heard a grisly popping sound, but the bracelet was well
woven and did not 
break easily. Using all her strength, Hiromi pulled and the woven band
finally came free, 
having ripped off the girl's hand. 
Blood began to fountain from Serena's severed wrist, and Hiromi reached
out more tentacles to 
try to restrain the now wildly flailing girl. Hiromi eventually managed
to hold Serena still, but the 
damage was done. There's blood all over. Maybe she's got some nice
clothes in the closet...
As Hiromi walked toward the closet, a rose streaked by her face. One of
the thorns scratched 
her, drawing glowing green blood, and her tentacles convulsed
involuntarily. She turned to face 
a man in a tuxedo wearing a mask. He began to speak, but Hiromi wrapped
him head to toe in 
tentacles, binding him like a mummy. If this leaves a scar, Ranma will
never marry me,thought 
Hiromi, beginning to cry again. 

Suddenly remembering her purpose, she flexed her tentacles until the
tuxedo man burst from 
the top and bottom like a rotten fruit. Checking her other victim, she
found that each tentacle 
held a limb, and the body hung from the head, itself pinned to the wall
by the tentacle jammed 
in its mouth. 

Hiromi loosed her gory baggage and wiped her tentacles on the
comparitively clean parts of the 
bed. She took some clothes from the closet without much thought and,
careful to keep them 
clean, left the room by the window through which she had entered. As an
afterthought, she 
wiped the flattened cat from her cloven hoof.

'Now to find the Tendo Dojo and Ranma Saotome.'


At the Tendo Dojo, Akane sat in her room listening to the rain. 'I hope
P-chan comes back. He 
seems to come here when it rains. I guess he's pretty smart for a pig...
'

She looked again at the friendship bracelet she had made for Ranma's
birthday. 'So what if it's a 
little big. He'd better appreciate it!' In truth, it was big enough for
a neck, but she'd gotten 
carried away with the pattern and had just kept going without thinking.
Rising, Akane went to 
Ranma's room to give him his present. 'I'm the only one who even got him
anything (well there 
was Kasumi's special birthday dinner, with another batch of cookies now
in progress), and, 
well, he'd better be happy.'

Reaching Ranma's room, she found it empty. She searched downstairs, the
pond, the dojo, and 
even braved the bathroom, but no Ranma. In desperation, she checked the
kitchen, but found 
only Kasumi, who was rolling out cookie dough. 

"Kasumi, have you seen Ranma?" 

Looking up , Kasumi said, "Well, Nabiki mentioned giving Ranma his
birthday present. Maybe 
she knows where he is." She selected her favorite cookie cutter and
began pressing shapes into 
the dough.

"Oooooooooooh!" Akane fumed. "Now he's gonna think I forgot and made
this at the last 
minute."

"Nonsense, Akane," smiled Kasumi, "I reminded everyone yesterday." 


Akane stormed up the stairs toward Nabiki's room. She raised her hand to
knock, but stopped 
when she heard voices - Nabiki's and female Ranma's.

"Happy birthday, Ranma."

"Wow, Nabiki! You'd really let me...?"
"It _is_ your birthday."

Akane stood frozen in shock, hand halfway to the door.

"Oh, Ranma, that was really good."
"There's more where _that_ came from."
"Well how do you like THIS!"
"Ohhhh... You're not bad , Nabiki."

The conversation faded, but Akane heard the sounds of flesh on flesh and
various inarticulate 
groans, each one turning her face redder and redder. 'I can't believe
it! My own sister! And 
Ranma?! Girl Ranma?!' Akane's eyes had grown to the size of plates, but
rapidly returned to 
normal size as she tried to rationalize. 'Well, Nabiki had always said
how _cool_ it was that he could 
change into a girl... And what about those times she felt him (I mean
her) up?' Bitterly, Akane 
decided not to barge in and confront them. 'Fine, then. If that's what
they really want... Nabiki 
was never shy about getting what she wanted...Maybe she'll want to be
his fiancee.' Oddly, this 
did not make her feel any better. Akane took hold of herself and calmly
walked back to her 
room. 'And you're not getting any present from me, Ranma!' She took the
friendship bracelet 
and tied it around her neck, yanking the knot as tight as she could. She
stood in front of the 
mirror, trying to convince herself, but she wasn't sure what of. 

"Oh Ranma," she whispered, beginning to cry.


Ranma stood and stretched her legs. "Wow, that was really great, Nabiki.
I didn't know you 
were that good at Street Fighter II. You nearly kicked my ass. Thanks
for letting me play on 
your Nintendo."

On the screen, Ryu stood with arms crossed above Bison's unconcious
body.

"I hope you enjoyed your birthday present, Ranma. You're not too bad
yourself." 'Letting you 
win one was a stroke of genius!' Nabiki set down her controller and
stifled an evil grin. 'Now 
you will fall into my trap!' As if unsure, Nabiki said, "I think I've
got your strategy figured out, 
Ranma..."

Confidently, Ranma challenged, "Do you want to play again?"

"Well . . . okay, Ranma. But this time for 1,000 yen. Just to make it
more interesting." 

"If you give me a minute to change back to a guy, you're on!"

Nabiki smiled this time, and it was not a smile for the weak of heart. 


Hiromi stomped through the neighborhood on her quest, dispatching
everything in her path. 
The rain had stopped, but her mood had only grown worse. Bodies lay in
her wake, human and 
otherwise, including a small black pig that had tried to stop her from
approaching the dojo. As 
she surveyed the Tendo dojo, she saw a two rooms upstairs with lights
on. Choosing one, she 
leaped, and sailed through the open second story window.

'Wrong, as usual,' thought Hiromi, seeing only a girl crying herself to
sleep. Around the girl's 
neck was a friendship - well - not a bracelet, but she was determined to
have one, now, and 
nothing would stop her. 'Maybe Ranma will like it...'
Reaching out with a tentacle, she grabbed the woven band and jerked as
hard as she could.


Through her grief, Akane heard someone come in through the window. Her
father had told her 
to leave it open, since it kept getting broken. It was usually Ranma,
anyway...

She felt something slithering by her neck, and suddenly a sharp yank
pulled her upright, and 
she heard a terrible ripping sound. A huge monster was clutching Ranma's
present, now torn, 
in one surprised tentacle. 

Akane ran from her room screaming. The monster followed. Akane saw the
door to Nabiki's 
room fly open. Her sister was still holding the Nintendo controller,
while Ranma was running 
from the room, his game forgotten. 'They were playing Nintendo!?'

The monster seemed to orient on Ranma, Akane quickly forgotten, and
rushed toward him, 
roaring fiercely. Akane crouched low and swept the legs out from beneath
the horrible creature.
Ranma dodged tentacles as he raced toward Akane. He grabbed her and
raced down the stairs, 
with tentacles and monster right behind.

Nabiki finished off Ryu and followed. 'No need to waste 1,000 yen,' she
thought to herself.  'And 
why does a monster carry a change of clothes?'


Ranma rushed through the living room, and tried to stop outside the
dojo, but the earlier rain 
had made the ground slippery, and he and Akane slid into the pond with a
tremendous splash. 
Ranma, now female but still determined, rose, standing between Akane and
the monster. "All 
right, whatever you are, you've had your fun. Get ready, here I come."
Ranma jumped at the 
creature, striking it hundreds of times on the armored skin with no
effect. She was forced to 
continuously dodge tentacles, and she appeared to be losing. 


Hiromi chased her fiancee down the stairs. 'How dare he grab that girl
like that, and in front of 
me, his fiancee!' She held her clean clothes in a tentacle behind her,
in hopes that they would 
still be wearable when she changed back. As she emerged from the dojo,
she spied the girl her 
Ranma had been carrying sitting in a pond and another girl squaring off
to fight her. 
'Another girl! Ranma will pay for this!' she said to herself. The girl
attacked. She was good, but 
not good enough, and soon Hiromi had both girls firmly in tentacle and
began to stretch them. 
'Maybe Ranma will show up to save them. Or maybe they'll pay the
ultimate price for flirting 
with my fiancee!'


Nabiki raced into the kitchen where Kasumi was just cleaning the last of
the dishes. Nabiki 
quickly grabbed the big bowl for mixing the cookie dough, currently
soaking in the sink. "I'll 
explain later, Sis," she said, leaving Kasumi standing bewildered.
Nabiki followed the sounds of screaming outside, and saw the monster
roaring in rage, with her 
sister and female Ranma stretched nearly to breaking. With all her
strength, she threw the bowl 
of hot water at Ranma, striking him in the head and sending hot water
everywhere.

As she suspected, not only Ranma changed, but the monster changed as
well, becoming a girl 
of about Akane and Ranma's age. Akane lay on the ground moaning, but not
seriously hurt; 
Ranma was out cold, however. "Sorry about that, Ranma," said Nabiki
quietly. "But it seems to 
have worked out for the best."
The girl looked at Ranma, then at her. Hiromi silently put on the
clothes she had been carrying,
then stood protectively in fromt of Ranma.  

"I am Hiromi Mitsuyama. He's my fiancee," she said, glaring. "Stay
away."


Nabiki held off a laugh, but just barely, "You're sure in for a
surprise."

End of Urotsukidoji 1/2 Part One: Curse of the Overfiancee. If anyone
actually likes this, Email 
me at bstallin@eagle1.eaglenet.com and cast your vote for who lives and
who dies in 
Urotsukidoji 1/2 Part Two: Overfiancee vs. the Universe, where all the
girls join together to 
fight Hiromi the Overfiancee. (Soon to be written if anybody  likes this
one...) Write if you hate 
it, too (like I can stop you...)

For those of you who object to having characters die - Get a grip! It's
not like I'm stopping 
anyone else from writing anything...

For those who merely object to my choice of victims, Email me with your
selections - top 2 or 3 
picks from anime or manga I know (I don't know it all, but I know a good
bit) will get it.

By the way, I AM a fan of Sailor Moon, but have only seen the American
versions. (Well I saw 
one episode on TV while in Japan, but there were no subtitles, and I
know almost no Japanese.)

As to why I left out the horror-lemon scenes typical of Urotsukidoji:
there's already tons of lemons
out there, but very few tentacle-monsters and gory violence for the kids
:)...