Damon Jason Casale wrote:

I found this mouldering away in my inbox...believe me, this was NOT my
fault!!  ^_-

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 JP> Star Trek shows a very American utopian future.  Everyone speaks
 JP> English... :-)

 NK> even the Klingons, the Romulans, the Ferengi and The Borg.

And he may yet regret it.
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Picard:  Attention, Captain of Klingon vessel!
Klingon: Who, me?
Picard:  Yes, *you*.  Explain your presence in this system.  Is there any
         reason why I should not tow you back to the nearest starbase?

Klingon:  [sings]

         Dear kindly Captain Picard,
         You gotta understand --
         We grow up on unspeakar-
         Ble tales of Kahless' Hand.
         Our Moms throw heavy objects,
         Our Dads throw heavy blows.

Klingons:  And we all get rust-stains from our clothes!

         Gee, Captain Picard, we are very upset;
         It's bad to grow up with a lobster on yer forehead.
         We ain't homicidal, we're misunderstood.
         Deep down inside us there is good!

Klingon: There is good!

Klingons:  There is good, there is good,
         There is untapped good.
         Like inside, the worst of us is good.

Picard:  That's a pretty pathetic explanation.

Klingon: Ain't it though?  You should hear the Romulans.  [jerks a thumb
         off-screen]
LOL!

LOL!
LOL!
*gasp*
*gasp*

--HAYES