Author's note: After comparing the manga to the OAVs for Vampire Princess
Miyu, it dawned upon me that I had based my Larva upon the one in the
OAVs. The Larva in the manga is a very different sort of person, able to
talk and remove his mask whenever he wishes. Striving to reconcile these
to very different people, I found myself writing another side story. A
lot more happens to Miyu and Larva in the later series of novels, but I am
placing my story's events before the events in those novels, since many
complex things occur and I have only managed to find brief descriptions of
those events. The events of my story do run counter to events in the
novels, so this is definitely an alternative universe to the actual VPMiyu
written by Kakinouchi Narumi.
Larva's Pain
Ari Side Story 2
by Charles Hurst
Before, the mask would come off, easily. I could smile at her and tell
her how much I cared. But the death of Remlas changed that. The clan's
retribution for that and my original crime was long in the coming, but
sure and just. My eyes never left her, even as Remlas passed away into
the darkness in pain and suffering. I watched her always. I had given
myself utterly to her, though it be my doom.
Time has little meaning for us, but the day came when I awoke to find my
brothers around me and a dark portal awaiting. I tried to get away, but I
could not use my full strength for fear of hurting them. I cried out
asking them to let me go, but they only looked back at me with sadness in
their eyes as they dragged me, chained and bound, towards the gate.
As they pushed me through, I felt myself pulled away, back to the place I
had left long ago with better intentions. I emerged into a brilliantly
lit room. As I blinked my eyes to clear the tears, I could see I stood
before the assembled clan. My parents and friends surrounded me. I had
never felt such fear or certainty in this place of judgement. The elders
whispered softly of my sin, my arrogance and my suicide, as they called
it. They spoke of Remlas. Their voices dropped lower in fear, and they
spoke of her. At long last, they rendered judgement. They placed their
masks of duty upon their faces and rose to stand before me. "Larva,
never-was, unborn." Those I expected, but they did not stop. "Masked,
silent forever, her freedom yours."
I collapsed to my knees on the cold floor as the words sank in. My name
removed from the clan and all records of my existence destroyed. The
erasure of the memory of all who had ever known me. The bond of mother
and child to be severed, my mother to never again know my face. To be
seen only as a sworn enemy of the clan, to be destroyed on sight. Those I
had anticipated. But the last two were unexpected and horrifying. I
shrieked in agony as Elena, holding my mask in her hands, appeared before
me. My voice stopped abruptly as the mask was sealed upon my face. My
very essence burned as it meshed with the substance of my imprisonment.
Elena leaned close and whispered in my ear. "There's one other way to be
free, beloved." She laughed then, and pulled away. She was as beautiful
as the day I first met her. And as cold. She took my face in her hands,
gently stroking the mask. "Kill her." Her eyes went wide and I again saw
the sickness in them that had made me flee from her in the first place,
volunteering for any duty that would take me far, far away. She rose
gracefully to her feet and spun around, disappearing back into the crowd,
that terrible laugh of hers echoing in my head long after she had gone.
Those standing nearby picked me up and threw me back through the portal.
Even now, I too feel the urge to laugh insanely as I continue to realize
the full weight of that terrible punishment. Miyu's destiny is to return
all the wandering shinma to the dark. I . . . am a shinma. I love her,
and I cannot permit her to go with me into the darkness forever, even
though she would try if she knew. Her freedom is my final punishment, for
I cannot stop our meshed destiny nor turn back the hands of time.
Miyu didn't understood at first. She tried to pull the mask off
repeatedly. She had come as close to crying as she ever had before when
she finally realized it wouldn't come off, including the time when she had
found Kaoru's double and had to kill him.
And then, when she discovered I no longer spoke to her, she ran away. It
had taken me several agonizing weeks to find her. She was in a school, as
usual, pretending to be a normal girl, laughing with her new friends. She
continued that pretense for a month, ignoring my presence, before she
could stand her loneliness no longer. She had turned and just stared at
me for the longest time before she gave a small cry and fled into my arms,
burying her face against my chest. She couldn't cry on the outside, but I
could feel her tears soaking through my shirt. She couldn't speak at
first as she held on to me fiercely, trembling.
I tried, Oh, God, how I tried to say something to sooth away her pain. At
first she thought I was angry with her and refusing to talk. She begged
my forgiveness, pleading for just a word or two. Then she grew angry,
demanding I forgive her. Finally she grew furious at my silence and used
her power over me, trying to force me to speak. She'd put her hand to my
throat as I tried, lying on the ground in convulsions as two unbearable
forces shredded my soul between them, and she had felt the muscles
straining to move.
She frantically commanded me to stop, then, to never speak to her again if
it would cause such pain. I . . . I couldn't tell her! I tried
everything! Attempts at writing came out as utter nonsense on paper. I
tried signing, but my fingers would spasm and twist as the muscles knotted
up. I cried behind my mask, but she couldn't see those tears, only the
bloody stains upon my mask which she did not understand.
Sometimes, when the pain becomes to great to bear, I have to be away from
her for a while. But I always return. She's my only joy, my fate, my
doom, the girl-woman I love and gave all I held dear for . . .
Don't cry for me, for I am a shinma, doomed to wander the dark forever.
Be happy that I have had one brief moment of joy, that I was able to
experience true love once in my miserable existence. The dark calls, and
I feel its gentle caress as it sighs my name. Soon they will have all
been sent back, and then I too will join with them, my brothers and
sisters, my mother and father.
I am Larva. This is my Pain.
Fin
C&C much appreciated!
Charles K. Hurst - ImageNation Corp. Wage Slave/Employee - RPI graduate-MechE
Chocolate and Anime Forever! 1 year, 3 months a fan and counting.
MI = eps. 96 MB = eps. 76 - 0/0 episodes each to utter boredom or Fushigi!
FY = eps. 28 Escaflowne = eps. 17 - ?/? to my next bout of depression. ^ ^