Subject: [C&C] Thy Inward Love
From: Sebastian Weinberg
Date: 7/22/1996, 6:46 AM
To: Fanfic Mailing List


The view fades in on a large room, that seem to be half kitchen,
half living room.  All furniture from the front half has been
moved to the back, making almost the whole room empty space.  In
the cleared space there are two chairs and a basket with a pillow
in it.  The chairs are facing a small "home movie" screen, that a
large, bearded man is just trying to set up.  As he moves before
the screen, it becomes clear that he is semi-translucent.

Sebastian:  Do you think you can manage to set the screen up
      without ripping it in two?

Angus:  I'm almost *done*, all right?  This is complicated.

Sebastian:  I'm sure it is.

Angus:  Whoever came up with the idea that these reviews should be
      done in a theatre anyway?

Sebastian:  I don't know.  That's just how it's done.  Ready?

Angus:  Yeah, yeah.

Sebastian:  Do we have everything?  Chairs - check.  Screen -
      check.  Projector - check.  Drinks - check.  Tissues?

Angus:  [holds up a box of tissues]  Yep.

Sebastian:  You brought *one box* of tissues?

Angus:  Well, I thought: better to bring too much than...

In that moment a cat comes through the door, pushing another box
of tissues with her nose.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Ah, thanks, Jennifur.  [turns to face the camera]  In
      case you didn't know, this fic is what Kristen Brennan so
      nicely called "a four hankie per chapter button-pusher" -
      and I mean that in the most positive sense possible.  It's
      really... really...

Jennifur:  "Myow"?

Sebastian:  Exactly!

Angus:  Can I turn off the lights now?

Sebastian:  Yes, yes.  Let's begin.

Sebastian takes the middle chair; Jennifur slinks into the basket
to his left.  Angus turns off the lights and cautiously walks over
to the projector that stands on a chair on the table in the back
half of the room.  He starts it and adjusts the focus to the
screen.  Then he comes up front and takes place in the right
chair.  He walks right through the projection beam, but the light
goes straight through him.  The screen flashes numbers counting
down, then the main feature starts.


: Thy Inward Love
: 
: By Richard Lawson 
: 
: Comments and criticism welcome! 

Angus:  Ha!  I bet he'll regret having said that.

Sebastian:  I don't know.  I really liked it, when I read it the
      first time in installments.


: Ranma, in mid-air, knew where he was going to land. He somehow
: found his way there again and again, yet he never lost his dread
: of it. Bracing himself, he fell headlong into the pond.
: 
: The change was always sudden, and always a shock to his system. In
: a second, mass shifted itself inside him, taking away from some
: areas and adding to others. He became smaller and differently
: balanced. Of course, there were many other changes, internal and
: external, but these were the ones he felt most keenly.

Sebastian:  Nicely done, that changing scene.  It makes clear
      immediately, that this is more than just a funny special
      effect, but a deep change within Ranma's body.  I've always
      wondered what it feels like.

Angus:  [hits him over the head]  Hentai.

Sebastian:  [pokes him with the elbow]  Idiot!  I meant *any*
      change, not just changing into a girl specifically.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Angus:  What she said.


: Nabiki wore a smile that, to Ranma's eyes, looked
: uncharacteristically warm. "Tatewaki-kun is going to give me a
: long-term low interest loan. I've worked the details out with his
: family's accountants; basically, I don't have to start repaying
: until I graduate. Until I've paid in full, the Kuno family has the
: right to retain my services free of charge. Kuno-baby has already
: testified to my business acumen. This will leave our family with
: enough so that Akane could go to college next year, if she wants."
: 
: Ranma looked down at what Nabiki's breifcase. It bulged with the
: two lunches it was carrying. Recently, Nabiki had asked Kasumi to
: make an extra lunch for Kuno. Nabiki's lunchtimes spent with Kuno
: were the gossip of Furinkan High. Most of the students speculated
: that she was after his family's fortune.

Angus:  When did this happen?  He's just saying it here, and we're
      supposed to imagine that this has been going on for some
      time?

Sebastian:  In fact, this was detailed in Richard's _The Right
      Side of the Ledger_.   It a character piece about Nabiki -
      how she got the way she was, Where she was heading, and how
      she avoided ending up as a heartless monster.  Very nice. 
      The author said, it was not strictly necessary to read it
      before TIL, but it's supposed to have happened before it.

Angus:  Should have declared it to be TIL's prologue, then.

Sebastian:  I don't see, why.  He sums up the outward effects very
      neatly in this paragraph.  If you need more detail, you can
      read the fic, but you don't *have* to.


: Ranma looked over at Kasumi, intending to ask her what had just
: happened. He was brought short by the look on Kasumi's face. Her
: mouth was turned down, and her forehead was wrinkled just the
: tiniest bit. On anyone else, it was a just a very slight
: irritation; on Kasumi, it was a full-blown rage. It chilled him to
: the bone in a way he hadn't experienced since he thought Akane had
: died.

Angus:  It's a sign!  The stars will fall from heaven, the seas
      will turn to blood and Kasumi Tendo will become angry. 
      [shivers]

Sebastian:  Ah, everybody acts as if Kasumi never shows any
      emotion but friendly, vacant happyness.  She's very well
      able to be angry or frightened, etc.  She just doesn't react
      as shocked to some things as the others do.

Jennifur:  Myow?

Sebastian:  No, no, I *like* the scene.  I think the author and I
      share a very similar picture of Kasumi.


: "I imagine," she continued, somewhat dryly, "that becoming a panda
: was a great relief for your father. Whenever the world threatened
: to force him to face his problems, he was a bucketful of water
: away from assuming a form that didn't have any problems at all. He
: used his panda form to hide from me when you were first introduced
: to me as 'Ranko'. That he dragged you into his deception was
: shameful. That he tried to hide your problems, even when I finally
: saw you as my son, is further evidence that he is still without
: honor."

Angus:  Yeah, that's Genma, all right.

Sebastian:  I like the way he uses a character in the story to
      analyse the metaphors of the story itself.  Takahashi-san
      chose the panda form for Genma because it fits his
      character, and here Richard has Nodoka pointing out how the
      cursed form symbolizes his character flaws.  Neat-o!


: "Ranma, let me give you some advice, based on my personal
: experience." Nabiki sounded worldly, as if the eleven month
: difference in their ages was a lifetime. "Go talk to someone. Get
: it out of your system. You'll just feel miserable until you do."

Sebastian:  Well, experience doesn't correspond to age.  A keen
      observer like Nabiki would have no trouble gaining more
      experience than a stubborn insensitive jerk like Ranma often
      is.

: Ranma looked up at her, unsure what to say. He tried to get some
: words out of his mouth. "I...it's just...I can't...."
: 
: "Not me, idiot. I could care less about what you're feeling."
: Nabiki thinned her lips and looked off to the side. "All right,
: I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. I do care." She looked back into
: Ranma's eyes. "But there's someone who cares more."

Angus:  I thot that the saying goes "I *couldn't* care less."  I
      mean, if she says she *could*, that means she does care,
      right?

Sebastian:  [grinning]  Isn't that what she just said?

Jennifur:  Myow!

Sebastian:  All right, I'll cut it out.


: He also had an ego the size of a small planet. For some reason, he
: considered admitting his affection for her an act of weakness. She
: wanted to be nice to him, to admit how much he meant to her. She
: had given him many opportunities to let his guard down so that
: they could talk freely about their feelings, and he had botched it
: every time, often insulting her in the process.

Sebastian:  But often the insult was just in the eye of the
      beholder.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  All right, not often - but sometimes.

Angus:  Just a *small* planet?


: Ranma stopped for a while, and his eyes began to glisten. And
: then, the words came out of him as if he couldn't stop. "I'm a bad
: person, Akane. I bully people and say bad things about them. I
: don't give anyone any respect; I'd rather punch them than be nice
: to them. I call you uncute and make fun of you and fight with you
: all the time, and I don't care if you get hurt while I'm doing it.
: I insult my father and make my mother feel unloved. Nothing
: matters to me other than my stupid martial arts, and what does
: that get me? Trouble with princes, monsters, and curses." Again,
: he hung his head. "I don't do nothing but hurt people. My life
: ain't worth nothing."

The first tissue is used.

Angus:  <sniffle>  Why does this self-finding stuff always have to
      hurt.  Now he got *me* all down.

Sebastian:  But Akane is with him.  She won't let him despair.

Jennifur:  Myow!

Sebastian:  Hey, I didn't say what happens, did I?  I just said
      that he won't stay depressed.


: She stared into his eyes for a second, her whole being shaking
: with the force of her emotions, hoping Ranma could see how she
: felt.
: 
: Then she leaned forward and kissed him.

Angus:  About time!

Sebastian:  Indeed.  I think this is the first time they ever
      kissed of their own free will.  Takahashi-san should really
      have let them have a scene like that in the Manga

Jennifur:  [dreamily]  Myow.


: "I could never figure out your father. You two insult each other
: all the time. I think it's just that you two aren't good at
: expressing your love, so you result to fighting and insults.
: Sounds like another couple I know." Akane gave him a little
: squeeze.

Sebastian:  It's nice to see that Ranma isn't the only one in this
      story who learns a bit about himself.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Yes, a little bit more analysing of Akane's behavior
      patterns (the passive-agressive bit) would have been nice,
      but the story would have been overburdened, don't you think?

Jennifur:  [reluctantly]  Myow.


: There was a tremendous crash from next door in Nabiki's room.
: Akane and Ranma blinked at each other, then hurried into the
: hallway.
: 
: Nabiki's door was open. Inside could be heard voices:
: "Saotome-kun, get off me, you've landed on my knee." "I'd do it if
: you'd unwrap your arm from around my neck, Tendo." "Daddy, you're
: going to wreck my stereo, be careful." "Genma, Soun-san, if you
: will let me...lift your leg a little...that's it."

: Ranma's jaw dropped open. "Kasumi?!"
: 
: Kasumi stepped daintily out of Nabiki's room, not looking the
: least bit embarrassed. "It's so good to see you and Akane getting
: along so well. Don't get too carried away, though, you're not
: married yet."

Angus:  Waahahaa!

Jennifur:  <snicker>

Sebastian:  [smiling]  Yes, comic relief is *most* welcome after
      scenes like this.  He does this a few times more, but not
      often enough for my taste.


: This, she supposed, was real love. Somehow they had neglected to
: say that word to each other.
: 
: Akane knew, though, that now it was only a matter of time.
: 
: Gripping her fiancee's hand, she smiled at her laughing family.

Sebastian:  I almost thought that it would end here.  Their
      relationship is semi-resolved with a clear path into the
      future and hints at things to come.  I would probably have
      ended it there, but that's just because I don't have
      Richard's talent and couldnt have pulled this whole thing
      off.

Angus:  [pats him on the head]  You see?  This fic even *induces*
      self-realization.


: Genma grunted in satisfaction. "Kuonji Ukyo depends mainly on two
: weapons: her small throwing spatulas, and her larger fighting
: spatula. Knowing that an attack from her is likely to come from
: one of these two places will make defeating her very simple."
: 
: Akane looked at him skeptically, then turned towards Ranma.
: "Besides, she respects you more than the others. She's more likely
: to listen to reason. It shouldn't have to come down to a fight."
: 
: Ranma grimaced. "She didn't seem very reasonable at the wedding."
: 
: Akane tilted her head. "I think she's just getting desperate. If
: we clear the air by talking to her rationally, she'll listen."

: Genma grunted. They seemed to have spurned his martial arts
: advice. No matter. Ranma would remember, once the fight had begun.
: As Genma knew it would.

Sebastian:  [flinches at the mention of the wedding]  As much as
      it pains me, but Richard is right to let Genma's evaluation
      be the correct one.  Personally I definitely prefer the fan
      consensus that Ukyou *ought* to be the "nice girl", but,
      alas, the manga shows her differently.

Angus:  Ah, she's obsessed, just like Shampoo and Kodachi, but
      she's more of a schemer and not that much into violence. 
      She'd rather arrange things so that it all happens
      "naturally", than force her way on others.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Angus:  Well, all right, there's that, but Ukyou's later violent
      acts are more plot necessities than actual characterization. 
      It was just a silly comedy after all.


: Ranma was in her fantasies, too. The first part of her life had
: been spent training to kill him. Well, maybe not kill him, but at
: least let him know how angry she was at him. When she'd been
: abandoned on the road by him and his father, a blackness had
: filled her. She had used the rage to train herself in a unique
: martial arts style, the blackness driving her on with promises of
: revenge. After she'd finished her training, she'd established her
: restaurant. She had recalled Ranma's name for her: "Ucchan". She
: had thought it endearing until he had run off with his father.
: Naming her restaurant "Ucchan's" had been a reminder of the
: revenge she was going to extract from Ranma.

: Unfortunately, he had other fiancees. The blackness found new
: targets, and she had attempted several plans to try and separate
: Ranma from the girls. When they failed, she had decided to try to
: win by setting a better example than his other fiancees. She had
: become industrious, friendly, and helpful. The name of her
: restaurant remained "Ucchan's"; now it was a promise of things to
: come for her and Ranma.
: 
: There had been times when she had almost given up, time when she
: had almost thought that Ranma didn't love her. The blackness had
: helped her then, though, reminding her that Ranma had called her
: cute, and that he wouldn't do that if he didn't love her. If other
: thoughts tried to argue differently, the blackness swallowed them.

Sebastian:  This image of the blackness in Ukyou's mind is very
      good.  Simple, elegant and very much suited to Ukyou's
      personality.


: "Ucchan - " Ranma stopped abruptly, seemed to reconsider his
: words. He had an unhappy look on his face. Ukyo looked over at
: Akane, who stood very close to Ranma, looking at Ukyo with the
: same sadness in her face, but mixed with a grim determination.
: 
: A cold lump of fear settled in Ukyo's stomach.

Angus:  I think she knows already.

Sebastian:  I think she knew all along, but wouldn't let herself
      realize.  It's all part of the "blackness" image above.


: "NO!" The word was ripped from Ukyo's throat. She reached over and
: grabbed her fighting spatula. She took it in an overhand grip and
: brought it crashing down on the counter in front of Ranma.

: Three of the throwing spatulas whizzed by Akane's head where the
: fighting spatula had been. The fourth struck Akane in the face.
: 
: Akane screamed, dropped the fighting spatula and fell to the
: floor. She slapped her hands to her face and curled up in a ball,
: her screams muffled.
: 
: "AKANE!" Ranma's voice reverberated throughout the room. Something
: struck Ukyo from behind, and she went flying to the side, landing
: in a heap on the floor. She watched in a daze as Ranma scooped up
: Akane. He kicked the door viciously; it literally exploded off its
: hinges, splintering into a hundred pieces. Ranma was through it in
: a flash.

Both Sebastian and Angus are gripping the armrests of their
chairs, all tensed up.  Jennifur has reduced one corner of her
pillow to tatters with nervous clawing.  Sebastian gets a grip on
himself.

Sebastian:  Um, I- I think Ukyou's behavior was well-captured and
      true.  Ranma's reaction to Akane's injury was 100% correct; 
      He doesn't hold back when Akane is threatened.  The whole
      fight was masterfully staged.

Angus:  It was unnerving.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Yes, I think so, too.  In fact I think it was the most
      gripping and upsetting fight scene in the whole story.

Jennifur:  Myow?

Sebastian:  Yes, even more than that.  But I'll tell you why, when
      we get to it.


: Ukyo felt the blackness coming over her again. She couldn't be
: responsible for this, she couldn't be the source of all the pain
: in the waiting room. Leave now, a scared voice inside her head
: told her. Leave now before they see you.
: 
: Too late. Kasumi looked up and stared directly at Ukyo.

Angus:  And a good thing, too.  If it had been Ranma, there
      might've been another fight.


: Kasumi spoke in a bright tone. "Did Akane tell you that you were
: welcome to come with us on our summer trip?"
: 
: Ukyo's jaw dropped open. "I-I couldn't possibly..."

: Kasumi continued speaking lightly. "Nonsense. You've known
: Ranma-kun since you both were children. You've helped our family
: out on many occasions. We're glad to have you as our friend."
: 
: Ukyo continued to gape at Kasumi, her self-recrimination slowly
: giving way to incredulous annoyance. Could Kasumi really be this
: oblivious? Could she truly not understand what had just happened?
: "Kasumi, you can't be serious. I simply can't go."
: 
: "You *will* go." For the briefest of moments, Kasumi's face
: hardened, and determination lined her features. "I will not have
: this ...misunderstanding...gnawing away at my family's peace of
: mind. You will come and have a good time and remain on good terms
: with Ranma-kun." She smiled again. "Isn't that what you want,
: Ukyo-chan?"
: 
: Ukyo reeled. This was a side of Kasumi she had never seen before.
: Ukyo realized there were depths to Kasumi that remained hidden
: under her usually cheerful nature.

Angus:  A-mazin'!

Sebastian:  Really?  I was not *too* amazed - I already said that
      I have a very similar picture of Kasumi and her
      "obliviousness".  She normally doesn't give a *reason*, like
      she does here, but the acts of calming down Ukyou and
      inviting her to the beach, despite the "obvious"
      impossibility of it, are very much in character.

Jennifur:  [shaking her head]  Myow.

Angus:  Down with that.


: Ranma shifted his gaze to Kasumi, his cold expression not
: changing. As Kasumi continued to smile at him, though, it started
: to melt. Finally, he looked almost sheepish as he said. "Yeah,
: that'll be nice. Kasumi, can I talk to Ukyo for a second?"

Sebastian:  It seems that Kasumi is master in her own technique -
      Martial Arts Niceness.

Angus:  That's a fighting style?  What does she do when someone
      hits her?

Sebastian:  She'd say "ow" and the opponent's heart breaks.  Of
      course, nobody would hit Kasumi in the first place.


: Before she could complete that thought, he gently but firmly
: lifted her hands off his shoulders. Pushing her away slightly, he
: asked "What about Konatsu?"
: 
: "Konatsu?" How could he be jealous of a cross-dressing ninja
: server? "I don't love Konatsu, Ran-chan, I love..."
: 
: Ranma interrupted her before she could finish. "But he loves you.
: He told you how he feels about you. He hangs around you all the
: time. He would do anything for you. Why don't you tell him you
: love him?"

Sebastian:  Ha!  Very good, but too reasonable for Ranma.  I have
      always enjoyed the characters' blindness to the fact that
      often their relationship to Ranma mirrors the relation of
      others (e.g. Mousse or Konatsu) to themselves.  Unreturned
      love abounds in the Ranmaverse.


: At that moment, for the first time, something penetrated the
: blackness in Ukyo's mind. It felt like a shaft of pure white light
: struck the core of her soul, carrying the message, "Ranma doesn't
: love you." Her mind shuddered and tried to block the light with
: the blackness. But the light stood firmly, echoing its message
: throughout her being. No matter what you do, no matter how hard
: you try, the light said to her, Ranma will never love you.
: 
: Ukyo shivered and fought back the blackness. She allowed the light
: to engrave its message on her soul. With acceptance came a strange
: peace. The conflict was over. She had lost, and that hurt a lot,
: but the wound would heal, and she would recover. It promised to be
: a long and painful recovery; too much of her life had been spent
: allowing the blackness to grow. Ranma would be there to help,
: though, as well as Konatsu. Kasumi would probably help, too. Just
: the thought that they would be there if she needed them was
: already helping.

Sebastian:  Very good continuation of the "Blackness" image.

Angus:  I liked the way how this little realization triggers a
      chain reaction in Ukyou's mind that finally allows her to
      let go.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Umm, more like a dam breaking.  Or better:  You know
      that trick where you put a playing card on a full glass of
      water and you can turn it over but the water stays in?

Angus:  Yeah!  I know that one.

Sebastian:  The trick is to keep it completely closed - if a
      single bubble of air gets into the glass, everything
      collapses and the water gushes out.  Ranma just inserted
      that bubble into the glass of Ukyou's mind.  Richard uses
      this kind of key realization, that opens the doors of
      denial, quite often.  He does it with Shampoo, too, and even
      Ryouga has his own epiphany.  He compares it to a cramped
      muscle, finally releasing tension, there.

Angus:  Don't forget Akane's discovery of P-chan's identity.

Sebastian:  Oh yes, right!  There he uses the image of a puzzle
      where the single pieces finally make sense, but I don't
      think that image really cuts it.  With a puzzle, you
      normally know the picture well before the final piece -
      there's never such a sort of sudden discovery.  What I think
      of is one of those optical illusions.  You know, the one
      with the old and the young woman?  You see one picture all
      the time and suddenly something makes the whole thing *snap*
      around.  All the lines are still the same but they make a
      different sense now.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Oh, yes, right.  Let's continue.


: Akane frowned at Ranma. "Come on, Ranma, we can't just knock on
: the Kuno door, ask for Kodachi, and then pound her until she
: agrees to stop chasing you."
: 
: "That would be *my* recommendation," a voice spoke forcefully from
: behind Nabiki.
: 
: Ranma, Akane, and Uncle looked up at this, staring at surprise as
: the speaker stepped around Nabiki. He bowed to the center of the
: dojo, then entered. "I, Kuno Tatewaki, offer my unconditional
: assistance."

Sebastian:  This scene serves mainly as further character
      development for Kunou and Nabiki.  Nicely done, in my
      opinion.

Angus:  I think it's done to fast.  Kunou went from being a total
      chowderhead to a slightly deranged, old-fashioned, but
      rational person in just about no time at all.

Sebastian:  As I said, most of the basic groundlaying for this
      development is done in _The Right Side of the Ledger_. 
      There we learn that this isn't a totally new side to Kunou,
      but just a facet we didn't get to see until now.  Nabiki
      assures us that he was like this all along, but didn't get a
      chance to show it.  Not unlike what we learn about Nabiki,
      by the way.

Angus:  But she still calls him "Kunou-baby".

Sebastian:  Well, nobody is perfect.  Allow Richard some slips,
      will you?


: He looked over at Ranma. "You have fought her before. You know her
: style, and the weapons she likes to use. It does not change from
: those she uses in the gymnastics ring. Beware of the traps she
: sets; she is quite clever in setting them up, and they change
: constantly."
: 
: Ranma nodded, while Nabiki wondered when Tatewaki had ever seen
: Kodachi fight Ranma in his male form.

Jennifur:  Myow!

Sebastian:  Indeed.  *Nice* foreshadowing.


: She put her hand on
: his arm, vaguely trying to reassure him. This kind of touchy-feely
: stuff was not her greatest skill; she usually left that to Kasumi.
: She wished she'd paid better attention to the tricks Kasumi used;
: she could use them now.

Sebastian:  Very good, the way Nabiki still thinks of the things
      Kasumi does as "tricks".  It shows that despite her
      smartness and knowledge of human nature she is still
      somewhat behind, emotions-wise.


: Nabiki looked after him, her mind reeling. There were layers and
: layers to Tatewaki, pain upon pain yet to be discovered within
: him. She wasn't sure it was a task she was willing to undertake.
: Much effort would be needed; would the profit be enough? Nabiki
: didn't know. Best to cut her losses now rather than risk more
: capital.
: 
: Nabiki continued to watch as his form was lost in the distance and
: light. Somehow, this investment drew her as no other ever had.
: Maybe it was worth trying to protect.

Angus:  Same here.

Sebastian:  Yes, I liked this scene especially.  The way Nabiki
      tries to express her confused feelings and falls back into
      the language of economics was wonderful, funny and a little
      sad at the same time.


: Kodachi's smile vanished, and her face twisted with rage. "Mother
: knew no more of honor than I. She taught me that honor was an
: outdated concept, to be used to manipulate those fools who still
: believed it valid."
: 
: "She taught you no such thing. She believed in the way of Budo.
: Moral Development. Discipline. Aesthetic Form. You showed none of
: those qualities today, sister."
: 
: Kodachi's voice was on the ragged edge; she was practically
: screaming. "If she believed in such things, why did she kill
: herself? Only to prove them for the lies that they were!"

Sebastian:  Here's something that I noticed in another of
      Richard's fanfics, namely the treatment of suicide.  Japan
      has a long tradition incorporating ritual suicide, and the
      entire cultural connotations of the act are different from
      ours.

Angus:  I don't think it's easier to commit suicide, even in a
      different cultural background.

Sebastian:  That's not what I meant.  It's always hard to overcome
      one's self preservation instinct, and it's always hard on
      the loved ones, but the entire cultural baggage attached to
      it is different.  Over here, suicide is the ultimate no-no,
      a damning offense, a rebellion against the orders of heaven
      and nature, in short:  something dishonourable.  In Japan
      it's not.  Kodachi would certainly be traumatized by the
      death of her mother, but her reasoning in this scene is more
      western than Japanese.


: Nabiki watched Tatewaki closely. His face was carefully neutral.
: "I have arranged to have her taken to a private hospital. I will
: have my father sign the papers, even if he doesn't fully
: understand the need. He owes it to my mother." He watched as the
: attendants strapped Kodachi firmly to the stretcher. "She will be
: in there for a long time, I think. It will not be forever. I hope
: it is not forever."

Angus:  Should have done that sooner.  It would have spared them a
      lot of trouble.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Do you think so?  *I* thought the solution was pretty
      good.  She's the only one of the fiances whom I consider to
      be truly nasty to have around.  She cannot be "cured" from
      her delusions like the other fiances, because she doesn't
      deny.  She knows perfectly well that Ranma doesn't want her
      and she doesn't give a damn.  Could you imagine *her* coming
      to the beach vacation?  I *do* agree, though, that she would
      deserve some further treatment in the story, like the others
      get at the end.


: Tatewaki sighed and looked back at Ranma. "Please, take your
: fiancee and go home. Kodachi will no longer bother you. Take your
: father with you." He turned and walked back towards the house. As
: he was walking away, they could hear him say, "Also, tell the
: pig-tail goddess I release my claim on... on him as well." 

Angus:  Ba-Ba-Booom!

Sebastian:  Heh, indeed.  Nicely done.


: Cologne grunted in satisfaction. This was the mood she need
: Shampoo to be in. "There is only one way we can accomplish this,
: great-granddaughter. We need to remove the source of his...
: distraction."
: 
: Shampoo grinned wickedly. "Violent tomboy pervert girl."

Angus:  Very accurate characterization.

Jennifur:  Myow?

Angus:  No, of Akane.  The words "Violent tomboy pervert girl" sum
      it up quite neatly, no?

Sebastian:  I take it you are not overly fond of Akane?

Angus:  Aw, she's okay - kinda.  But I was rooting for Ukyou.

Sebastian:  So that's why you used half a box of tissues during
      her scene?  Do you realize that we have some of the most
      tragic parts still before us?

Angus:  No fair!  Your hands were in the tissue box just as often
      as mine.

Sebastian:  OK, granted.  Let's go on.


: Cologne moved through the kitchen
: gathering various ingredients.

Angus:  She's cooking up something again?

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Ha ha!  No, no passion spice this time.  But your
      guess is not *that* far off.


: He stopped and put both of his hands against the wall on either
: side of her head. "You're getting better, Akane, but you let me
: have my way too much. When I started attacking, all you did was to
: defend and retreat. You got to use some countermoves, or your
: opponent will do with you as they will. Never let your opponent
: develop a rhythm; find ways to disrupt it."

Sebastian:  Why do I have this feeling that this piece of advice
      will become important later on?

Jennifur:  [smirks]


: Nabiki had also left in a rush, mentioning plans with
: Tatewaki.
: 
: Akane smiled; if given a thousand years to think on it, she would
: never have imagined those two together.

Angus:  Me neither.

Sebastian:  It wouldn't have worked with the Nabiki and Kunou from
      the manga, but Richard's characters have already departed
      from them quite a bit.  It works now.


: Akane sighed. She wasn't a great listener, she knew that. Her
: biggest fault was that she would assume too much, too quickly, and
: not let anyone tell her otherwise. There may have been times when
: Ranma had been trying to tell her something of how he felt, and
: she hadn't given him a fair chance to express it.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Angus:  You can say *that* again!

Sebastian:  Yes, that's something that had to be said.  Ranma may
      be a jerk, but Akane doesn't very often give him a chance
      when he tries not to be.  I think this passage is new,
      though.  There was not much soul-searching on Akane's part
      that I remember from the first time this was posted.


: Akane dropped her book bag onto the ground. They had intended to
: have a planning session on what to do about Shampoo last night.
: They had put it off until tonight. Somehow it had never occurred
: to anyone that Shampoo would make her move first.

Sebastian:  *Very* good.  Many writers (myself included) would
      probably have fallen into the trap of having all the fiances
      sit still until it's their turn to be disposed of. 
      Congratulations.


: Shampoo was strong,
: stronger than Akane.

Sebastian:  I'm not so sure about that...  Any proof we've seen?

Angus:  Seems to me, Akane's gorilla strength is one of her
      outstanding characteristics.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Oh, yes, right.  That was in the Super-strength-noodle
      part, wasn't it?  I guess he's right then.


: Something touched her high on her back, just at the base of her
: neck. And all of sudden, Akane couldn't feel a thing.
: 
: Shampoo threw her off like a rag doll. Akane landed in a heap
: several feet away, but she couldn't feel the ground, didn't feel
: the pain of bouncing on the pavement. She couldn't even more her
: eyes, although she could still see.
: 
: What she saw was Cologne, pulling her staff back. In her other
: hand she carried Shampoo's sword.

Jennifur:  [fluffing her fur]  Hisssssss!

Angus:  Damn old crone!  Never fights fair.

Sebastian:  It comes even worse...


: Shampoo kicked her shoulder. Akane felt nothing as she flopped
: onto her back, staring at the sky. Shampoo lifted Akane's chin
: with her sword. She rested the edge briefly on Akane's neck, then
: raised the sword over her head in a two-handed grip.

: Then came: the sword blurring, the sound of metal slicing flesh,
: and blackness.

Sebastian:  And here the episode ends.

Angus:  [shuddering]  Whoa, total cliffhanger!  Quick, the next
      part.

Sebastian:  Do you really think that Akane has been killed?

Angus:  [stops and thinks]  No.  It's completely unthinkable. 
      He's just trying to drive us crazy.

Sebastian:  That's what I thought when I read this.  I figured
      that Mousse would intervene - why else would he have
      listened in on their battle plans at the beginning?

Angus:  Oh, that was the shadow!  Of course.  Besides, the author
      spent so much time on the advancement of Ranma's and Akane's
      relationship and character development, he wouldn't kill the
      main character off in the middle of the fic.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Angus:  Uh.  Well, all right, but this isn't a Hitchcock movie.

Sebastian:  Nevertheless, Richard know about suspense.


: "Mother?"
: 
: Akane looked for her mother. She was so hoping to see her soon; it
: had been so long. Surely she would be the first of her ancestors
: to greet her.
: 
: The blackness cleared, to be replaced by a field of white. She
: didn't think that was right. She had heard about white light,
: something that guided you to the next world. Akane had been hoping
: for her mother instead. Still, if Mother was nothing more than
: white light now, Akane wouldn't mind. Just so that she was near.
: 
: But the white wasn't light; if anything, it looked like cloth.

Sebastian:  Very nice description of the process of becoming
      conscious as well as the kind of sleepy logic that Akane
      exhibits here.

Angus:  [putting away a tissue]  Touching, too.


: "She surprised me. I had no idea she was that strong. Ranma's been
: training her, I can tell. Next time, she won't beat me so easily."
: 
: "Next time, Shampoo? What next time?

Jennifur:  Myowrrrl!

Sebastian:  Yes, it shows us where Cologne stands - and Shampoo.


: Mousse had gone to Japan, too. His love for Shampoo knew no
: bounds, and he would do anything for her. He had seen her over the
: months, rejecting him, pining over Ranma. He had watched Cologne
: using that to her advantage, slowly warping the Shampoo he had
: loved into a hateful, twisted woman bent on using whatever methods
: necessary to get what she wanted.
: 
: Mousse had done what he could. He had always been a moderating
: influence on Shampoo while she was growing up. When she had been
: about to go on one of her rampages, he had tried to soothe the
: fires that burned within her. He had succeeded sometimes. He had
: learned painful lessons other times.
: 
: Now he could only watch as Shampoo became more and more like
: Cologne. Mousse was doing everything he could to stop it. He just
: wasn't sure if he had done enough, or waited too long. Shampoo had
: come within a hair's breadth of becoming a murderer.
: 
: Mousse grimaced; was he any different? He'd been trying to kill
: Ranma from the moment he met him. It was the old Amazon credo:
: Kill that which gets in your way.

Sebastian:  Wonderful.  In just a few paragraphs Richard dedicates
      more characterization to Mousse than Takahashi-san did for
      most of the series.

Angus:  Well, the series was just meant to be funny.  A lot of the
      characters were less than three-dimensional.


: Ranma entered the dojo, his heart hammering. He had done some very
: scary things this afternoon with Nabiki, an experience he would as
: soon forget.

Angus:  Will we ever learn what they were?  We saw him go to
      Nabiki after his argument with Akane, and now there's this
      comment.  What's behind this?


: She considered the package she had tucked away in her wraparound.
: It had been another one of her concoctions, one that was meant to
: drive Ranma insane with lust at the smell of lilacs. 

: Ranma
: would have willingly followed the smell of lilacs all the way back
: to China, and there would have been no one left to come after him.

: That plan was in ruins now. Ranma would know very soon that
: someone had tried to kill Akane. Cologne knew him well enough to
: know that he would never forgive Shampoo for Akane's death. He
: would have been easy to hold in China; she would simply have
: convinced him that Akane had given up on Ranma and moved on. With
: Shampoo providing a willing distraction, Akane would have been
: soon forgotten. 

Sebastian:  She also might have reasoned that Ranma's love to
      Akane was rooting him to Japan.  With her dead, he could
      only mourn her and he could have mourned her just as well in
      China.

Angus:  Only she would have had to put the blame for her death on
      somebody else - and that would have been pretty difficult,
      Shampoo being the last fiance left.


: A whisper was her only warning; she used her staff to block
: Ranma's kick, then vaulted backwards to avoid Ranma's fast-moving
: right jab. Ranma was moving perfectly, quickly, and all of a
: sudden Cologne began to doubt her ability to defeat Ranma. This
: was not a boy incautiously attacking, leaving all sorts of
: openings in his haste to acquire something from her. This was a
: martial artist in the prime of her powers, totally focused, and
: with deadly intentions.

Sebastian:  Another instance where the threat to Akane helps Ranma
      to focus his will and abilities.  Some time back, he would
      have gotten mad and sloppy, now he gets more deadly.  Neat
      scene;  Very gripping.

Angus:  Shut up and let us watch.


: Something shot out of the smoke-filled building. Akane tried to
: follow it with her eyes, but it was soon lost among the other
: buildings. She heard someone coughing below, just outside the
: building. The coughing slowed, and a voice shouted, "You old hag,
: just you wait! This ain't over yet!"
: 
: The voice was like a broom that swept the cobwebs from her mind.
: Joy filled her, driving out the lassitude and replacing it with
: excitement and eagerness. Eagerness to be reunited with the
: voice's owner.
: 
: "RANMA!" She shouted as loud as she could, the excitement too big
: to be contained any other way.

Angus:  <sniff>  Wonderful.  What a touching reunion scene.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Yeah, that broom image was lovely.


: The voice inside her was insistent. Remember when the phoenix
: attacked? Akane had fallen, and would have been hurt, if not
: killed. Yet you slid under her and rescued her. You don't really
: hate her.
: 
: A moment of weakness, she assured herself. Great-grandmother would
: have let Akane fall. Shampoo told herself that she must be strong
: like Great-grandmother now.
: 
: The voice asked, is that strength, or cruelty?
: 
: Shampoo beat the voice back. No distractions, not now.

Sebastian:  Again we have the struggle of conscience and
      rationality against the forces of denial.  There are cracks
      in the dam.

Angus:  I bet we get to see it break soon.


: Is that the future you want? Respected, feared, hated? To
: manipulate those around you, to use them with little regard for
: their feelings, your needs all that matter? The old ways are
: dying, and she with them. Don't let her use you to try to carry
: the old ways into the new world, or it will destroy the Amazons.
: You know this.
: 
: She felt tears coming from her eyes. She had kept so much
: repressed, so much buried. She remembered her childhood dreams, to
: be the strongest of the Amazon warriors and to lead her people
: into a new millenium. Why had she given up on those dreams to
: chase after a man? Because one old woman had sought to use her, to
: avenge an imagined slight on the honor of the Amazons. It was time
: to set that right, to put her life back on track.

Sebastian:  And there it is.


: This was not how it was supposed to go. With each
: fiancee, Akane had come closer and closer to being killed. It was
: his job to protect her and he was failing. Miserably.

Angus:  Hey, that's right.  In all three fights, it was Akane who
      was really threatened.  It's not often that the characters
      realize this.

Sebastian:  It's also not often that authors do.  Many authors use
      the "threat to Akane" ploy without thinking twice. 
      Aparently Richard *did* think.


: "No!" She violently slapped his hand away. She stood in front of
: Ranma, still sobbing but standing straight, gazing at him, looking
: for all the world like she wanted him to hit her again.
: 
: Ranma stood, wavering. This woman had tried to kill Akane, had
: nearly succeeded. Yet there was no part of him that wanted to keep
: hitting her. He could not forgive her, not yet, maybe not ever,
: but he couldn't go on punishing her either.

Sebastian:  He *has* grown, hasn't he?  And Shampoo's repentance
      is extremely touching.

Angus:  [blows his nose]  J-just shut up.


: "Of course," she continued in a mischievous voice, "there's a
: certain appeal to being rescued a lot. It's fun to pay the
: grateful damsel." She snuggled deeper into his grasp, sighing with
: contentment.

Angus:  Oh, I get it.  That's why she always lets herself be
      abducted so easily.  I always thought that she should be
      able to fight for her own.

Sebastian:  Was she kidnapped *that* often in the manga?  I think
      that's more a *fanfic* clichee than real canon.


: With a start, Genma realized it was up to him to bring some order
: to this bunch. Part of him wished for a bucket of cold water:
: pandas couldn't talk, and wouldn't be expected to take charge of
: the situation. He beat that part of his mind down; pandas also
: don't have wives.

Sebastian:  I'm not sure what he means by that last part.  Does he
      decide so out of *fear* of his wife, or does he do so to
      prove himself worthy of her.

Angus:  I think it's the second.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  I sure hope so.


: Genma nodded. In her own way, Kasumi was as formidable as anyone
: else he knew.

Sebastian:  I always thought so.

Angus:  Yay!  Let's hear it for Kasumi!

Jennifur:  Myow!


: A game of shogi
: or go was good for Soun whenever he became overwrought.

Sebastian:  Oh, by the way, can someone tell me more about that
      game?  Genma and Souun are often portrayed to cheat by
      turning the board around.  I don't know about Shogi, but
      that tactic certainly won't help with Go:  The white pieces
      stay white and the black pieces stay black, no matter how
      you turn the board.

Angus:  But then, Genma and Souun stay stupid, too.


: "It is so nice," Nabiki interrupted, "to see you two acting
: normally again. I was afraid I was going to have nothing to look
: forward to each morning besides the sight of the two of you
: staring at each other dreamily."

Sebastian:  [jumps up]  Gah!  This is almost the same I had her
      say in one of my own pieces.  Now I'm so far that I steal
      without even noticing.  Help!  Richard Lawson is taking over
      my subconscious!

Angus:  Siddown, idiot!  You're blocking the picture.


: She looked to see Shampoo, her long hair wrapped in a towel,
: cowering at the far end of the tub. She had her hands over her
: mouth, and her eyes were wide with fear.

: Akane's anger finally melted. She knew all about unrequited love.
: It had hurt Akane to give up on Tofu-sensei in favor of her
: sister, but at least she had had Ranma.
: 
: Shampoo began sniffling. "Is easy to let Great-grandmother tell
: Shampoo how to force Ranma to love her. Is easy to do all sorts of
: hurtful, sneaky things to try to win Ranma's love. What means
: honor, pride, Amazon way, when it mean Shampoo can no have Ranma?"
: Shampoo looked up at Akane, tears streaming from her eyes.
: "Shampoo is ashamed. She no really want to kill Akane. She knew
: Mousse would stop her. But she still hurt Akane, torture Akane.
: Torture Ranma because Akane hurt. Shampoo want to make up for all
: that. Shampoo give her life to Akane. Akane say, Shampoo do. Akane
: say, 'Die Shampoo', Shampoo dies."

: "Shampoo can go now, Akane?" She had that superior tone in her
: voice again, a trait she shared with Kodachi that had always set
: Akane's teeth on edge. Akane looked around for something to throw
: at her. Nothing came readily to her eye, so she just yelled, "Get
: out!"

: If Akane didn't kill her first. Shampoo was still an infuriating
: person to deal with. Akane relaxed in the tub, fantasizing about
: various creative ways she could order Shampoo to her death.

Sebastian:  Very *very* good scene.  I can't begin to describe how
      much I loved this.

Angus:  Then don't.

Sebastian:  Shut up.  Richard managed to cover every important
      topic, summed up Akane's feelings and expressed Shampoo's
      dilemma *and* avoided falling into the trap of resolving
      everything too fast.  Masterful work.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Oh, yes, thanks for reminding me, Jennnifur.  There's
      a little problem I have with Shampoo's diction.  Shampoo's
      "Bimbo speak" is a result of her unfamiliarity with the
      language (in dubio pro reo) but Richard often has her use
      some expressions and constructions that are pretty
      indigenous to the language and not normally known to
      beginners like Shampoo.  Sometimes her sentences are just
      normal sentences with the verb transformed to the infinitive
      form.  I just thought I'd mention it.


: Ranma sighed and removed the headphones. One of these days, he was
: going to come in here and destroy Nabiki's stereo system.

Angus:  Heh heh heh!

Sebastian:  Here we have the comic relief again.  Especially after
      a emotionally wrenching scene, like the one before, it is
      most welcome.


: "Is time Great-grandmother stopped being matriarch. Is maybe time
: for Great- grandmother to write poems and play with childrens and
: leave Amazon business to modern Amazons."

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Yes, I admire that.  It's touches like this - a
      throwaway remark that hints at the amazon culture - that
      show us how much thought was invested into this fic.  That's
      what makes a fic good:  Thought.


: Ranma drew in a breath. "Shampoo! Mousse! Form a triangle. We'll
: keep our backs to each other. Don't let them draw you away. If
: they surround you, you're done for. Wait for them to attack.
: You're each responsible for an arc of 120 degrees, which is about
: your field of vision looking straight ahead. Don't go for an enemy
: outside your arc, you'll just leave yourself open elsewhere. We
: gotta trust each other. Don't hold back; these folks are already
: dead."

Angus:  That's a pretty elaborate plan for someone like Ranma.

Sebastian:  Ah, I dunno.  Ranma isn't stupid, just not very well
      educated.  I'm sure he could come up with this plan, but he
      wouldn't use this vocabulary - talking about arcs and
      degrees.  I guess he wouldn't know how many degrees a third
      of a full circle is, anyway.


: "This is not honorable combat, child." One of them spoke in a
: quiet whisper that seemed to be in Ranma's mind more than in her
: ears. With a start, she realized they were speaking Chinese, but
: somehow she understood them.

Angus:  Cheap ploy to make Ranma able to follow the conversation
      without Mousse for translations.

Sebastian:  And us, too.  Cut him some slack, or we couldn't
      understand this scene either.

Angus:  Ooops.  I accept it!  Of course, very logical - They're
      ghosts after all, they have supernatural powers.


: The shadow warriors closed on Cologne. She screamed, a sound Ranma
: found more horrible than any other sound she had ever heard.
: "Shampoo! Mousse! Help me!" The shadow warriors surrounded her.

: Ranma bounced up and ran back towards the dojo. But she was far
: too late. The spirits faded, and Cologne with them. As Ranma
: reached the dojo, all that was left of Cologne was the echo of her
: last scream.

Angus and Sebastian are gripping their armrests tightly.  Their
eyes are screwed shut and their teeth clenched.

Angus:  C-can we look again?

Jennifur:  [annoyed]  Myow.

Sebastian:  Phew!  [wipes sweat of his brow]  I never thought I
      could feel sorry for Cologne.

Angus:  You didn't feel sorry for her in Kun-chan's latest fic.

Sebastian:  Well, what Kun-chan did to her was just nasty (and
      deserved at that), not... *creepy*.  [shudders]


: He'd looked at her, beaming. "Your hair looks beautiful when it's
: wet. So much better than fur."
: 
: Shampoo's eyes had widened, and she'd looked down at herself.
: "Aiyaa!" she looked up at Mousse, and they'd hugged each other in
: happiness, doing an impromptu dance in the courtyard.
: 
: Ranma had looked wistfully at them. "Just 'cause a guy ain't an
: Amazon, doesn't mean they couldn't have helped him out, too." But
: she had smiled at the couple. It was too hard not to share in
: Mousse's and Shampoo's excitement.

Angus & Sebastian:  Awwwwww!


: Ranma's head jerked to the side all of a sudden, and a suspicious
: look came over his face. "Excuse me a sec, Akane," he said
: causally. He walked along the roof, hooked his feet into the
: gutter and leaned over the edge. "Yaaaaahhhhhhh!" Ranma's shout
: was loud, and it was immediately followed by a shriek from inside.
: Someone threw a string of curses at Ranma, who merely lifted
: himself back up. He came over to sit down next to Akane, putting a
: disconnected microphone on the roof next to him.

Angus:  Heh heh hyuck!

Jennifur:  <snicker>

Sebastian:  This gag was long in the making.  Neat!


: Suddenly it hit Akane. He was finally going to say the words.

: "Akane, will you marry me?"

: Akane blinked. Those weren't the words he was supposed to say.

Angus:  Ain't that always the way with him?


: The other women never really had a chance.

Sebastian:  I see that you revised the ending that you didn't
      like.  It's very good.

Angus:  I liked the one with the "Oink" better.

Jennifur:  Myow!

Sebastian:  Exactly.


: This time, the exploding rock revealed daylight. Ryoga sighed,
: then reached around and turned off the lantern strapped to his
: backpack. He widened the opening a little, then stepped out.
: 
: He was in the middle of a street. Some people were looking at him
: strangely, but he was used to it. He looked around, hoping to find
: some place familiar. The restaurant across the street looked
: familiar, but it was named "Ukyo's". Obviously not "Ucchan's",
: which was too bad. He could usually get a free okonomiyaki or two
: out of Ukyo.

Angus:  Huh, that's news to me.

Sebastian:  I don't think that Ukyou and Ryouga like - or even
      know - each other that well.


: Nabiki, though, had been experiencing it the longest. "Don't give
: me that stupid look, Kasumi. I know there's more going on in that
: pretty little head of yours than you let on. If you'll just tell
: me where the da-, uh, where the shampoo is, I'll get out of your
: room."
: 
: Kasumi couldn't help but laugh a little. She should know better
: than to try and fool Nabiki; she was as good an observer of human
: nature as Kasumi had ever seen. Almost as good as Kasumi herself,
: although she'd never let Nabiki know that.

Sebastian:  This is a scene I like *very* much.  Both these
      sisters have been kept pretty one-dimensional in the manga -
      Kasumi more so, since you can't really build much of a plot
      around her - and I love to see them here as real people with
      hidden facets and everything.


: Kasumi looked down. "I told him my family needed me too much. They
: depended on me for so much; I couldn't leave them. He understood."

Angus:  Whoa!  Major retcon!

Sebastian:  This is the point where I think Richard is most out of
      phase with the manga.  Even if you accept that Kasumi is not
      really oblivious, I strongly doubt that she would have
      talked about this with Toufuu-sensei.

Angus:  It's not as if he plays any role in the manga after the
      first few volumes.


: She smiled, a good, wide smile that was not calculated to cheer
: anyone up, or to deflect their anger, or to comfort them during
: their troubles. Rather, it was a smile that reflected how happy
: she was.

Sebastian:  Bzzzt!  This is where we part company, Richard.  While
      I share the view that Kasumi is a lot more aware of what is
      going on than she lets on, I don't believe for a minute that
      her cheerfulness and smiles are just dishonest, calculated
      gestures.  She *uses* her niceness to cheer up others, but
      it is nevertheless real and springs from her heart.

Angus:  You mean you've been *thinking* about Kasumi's ditziness?

Jennifur:  Myow!

Sebastian:  Yeah, Shut up!


: As had hoped, Ranma started turning red, both from anger and
: embarrassment. Ranma clenched his teeth, but Tatewaki had
: carefully phrased his words so that Ranma could find no insult in
: them. Ranma glared at Tatewaki, but couldn't find anything to say
: back. Tatewaki adopted a superior, amused expression guaranteed to
: further drive Ranma crazy. Mentally, he thanked Nabiki for her
: observations. There were more ways to get to Ranma than by futile
: physical attacks.

Angus:  Heh heh heh.  Thanks, Nabiki.

Sebastian:  Nice to see Kunou win for once.  Although I have to
      admit that I think Ranma was right.  Nabiki really has to do
      something about Kunou's medieval mindset.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Angus:  Romantic?  Annoying, I'd call it.  But then, I'm a man.


: Kasumi was sitting in the center of the room, the implements of
: the tea ceremony in front of her. She was wearing a kimono, and
: she had her hair tied up on her head. She gazed at the far wall,
: not acknowledging him for the moment, her expression neutral. He
: couldn't help but gasp; she was more beautiful than he had ever
: seen her before. As she heard his gasp, he saw her smile briefly.

Sebastian:  The information on the tea ceremony was very much
      appreciated.  Just a few days ago I saw a japanese film
      where the tea ceremony figured greatly, and it helped me
      understand more.

Angus:  You didn't understand anything anyway, 'cause you turned
      on the japanese original tone even though you don't
      understand a word of it.

Sebastian:  I did *too* understand a word!  Several words even. 
      [sticks out his tongue]


: Nabiki was walking down the hallway, humming slightly to herself.
: It was difficult to tell in the darkness, but she looked slightly
: disheveled.
: 
: Akane called out to her softly. "Nabiki, how was the prom?"
: 
: Nabiki answered dreamily. "A little disappointing. I understand it
: gets better, though."
: 
: Akane gaped at her. "What?"
: 
: Nabiki started. "Uh, it was fine, the prom was fine."

Sebastian:  Bwaaahahahahaa!  <wheeze, wheeze> hee hee.. That
      <giggle> that was perfect.  <giggle>

Angus:  'Twas.


: She held him closely while she ran through the streets. Ryoga's
: mind was whirling. Akari. He loved her, almost as much as he loved
: Akane. More than he loved Akane. Maybe. Akari certainly loved him,
: was even willing to give up pigs for him. That kind of devotion
: was hard to ignore.
: 
: He looked at her face again, which was set in a big smile as she
: ran. She was very pretty, too. Prettier than Akane. Maybe. Her
: long hair flew around her head as she ran, and Ryoga thought it
: was beautiful. More beautiful than Akane's short hair. Probably.

Jennifur:  [sarcastically]  Myow.

Angus:  Ha!  You got *that* right.  Heh heh heh!

Sebastian:  Now come on.  Ranma was quite indecisive, too,
      sometimes.  *Particularly* about girls.


: Ranma looked down, this time in shame. "I haven't told you about
: the curse."
: 
: Akane's voice sounded puzzled. "What do you mean? I know all about
: the curse."
: 
: Ranma fidgeted. "Not all of it."

Angus:  I smell another retcon coming.

Sebastian:  Yes, but a pretty ingenious one.  By declaring Ranma's
      inability to acquire a cure *part* of his curse, a lot of
      logical holes are closed.  Now it all makes sense.


: His father grimaced. "This is not honorable. The times we tried
: this before ended in disaster, mostly because you were not
: consulted. Your mother does not understand this. She is so
: obsessed with getting you married, she is resorting to this
: trickery, not allowing you a choice in the matter. I believe this
: is wrong." He looked into Ranma's eyes. "This is your life, boy.
: Tendo and I got you engaged, and I think it worked out okay, but
: it didn't have to. You and Akane want to get married, and that is
: more than we could have hoped for. I believe, however, that you
: should get married when you want to. If it's not for a few years,
: I understand."

Angus:  My, my, seems like Genma was doing some growing, too,
      while we weren't looking.

Sebastian:  It makes sense, after all he had just as much time for
      it as Ranma had.  Just because his conflicts were not
      presented to our eyes as Ranma's were, doesn't mean he had
      less to go through.


: She had brought him tea and buns. What's more, she had bundled
: herself up and seemed ready and willing to stay with him as long
: as he wanted her company. She hadn't yelled at him, hadn't called
: him an idiot for refusing to bow to Happosai. She had just seen
: that he was in trouble, and had offered her help.
: 
: Ranma wasn't entirely sure, but he thought that was the moment he
: fell in love with her.

Sebastian:  That's pretty late, don't you think?  There are *lots*
      of instances where their love showed through, before this.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  [slaps his forehead]  Duh!  Right!  This is *Ranma's*
      estimate of the time when it happened.  Of course that's
      different from when *we* realized it.


: Ryoga smashed the street sign, crumbling it. Ranma was able to
: leap away, landing on a car. Hopefully Ryoga had some respect for
: other people's property. "Come on, buddy, this won't get you
: anywhere. I don't want to fight you, and you really don't want to
: kill me. Let's say you and I talk this over, okay?" Ranma almost
: couldn't believe his own words. He *had* changed.

Sebastian:  How neat to have Ranma realize that, himself.  Cool.


: She flushed a little at the thought. Her physical relationship
: with Ranma had been proceeding slowly. She wasn't sure if she was
: going to go Nabiki's route and indulge in something prenuptial, or
: if she would be like Kasumi and remain virginal until she was
: married. She was, however, coming more and more to anticipate the
: moment. Ranma was very handsome, and surprisingly gentle when they
: were making out.

Angus:  He wouldn't be a good martial artist, if he didn't have
      the control to be gentle when it counts.


: To her surprise, Akari answered her. "Oh, I imagine Ryoga doesn't
: want to be a pig anymore."
: 
: Akane's eyes widened. She grabbed Akari's shoulders, turned her to
: so they were face to face. "What did you say?"
: 
: Akari looked at her in surprise. "Oh, didn't you know? Ryoga turns
: into the cutest little pig when he's hit with cold water."

Angus:  Ka-BOOOOOM!!

: It was the single greatest shock of Akane's life. Suddenly a
: hundred things all fell into place at once. Little puzzles,
: strange behaviors, the way Ranma acted sometimes - it all made
: sense.

Sebastian:  Ooops, seems like I remembered this part wrong.  He
      was talking of puzzling situations suddenly making sense,
      not comparing the realization to the solving of a jigsaw. 
      (Stupid German Mistake #2054:  Thinking the word "puzzle"
      primarily refers to a jigsaw puzzle)  Anyway, this is
      another of those key realizations.


: The bandana. She should have known by the bandana.

Angus:  Yep, she should have.

Sebastian:  I never understood how she could *not* know.  I
      strongly suspect that she knew very well, subconsciously,
      and denied it because she knew it made Ranma jealous.


: She couldn't contain it any more. "RYOGA NO BAKA!" She hit him as
: hard as she had ever hit anyone or anything in her life. Ryoga
: went flying up and away. He hit the top of a telephone pole not
: too far away.

Angus:  That's not very far away, then.  She's hit others clear
      across town, so if this was harder than ever before, he
      should be halfway to Jupiter.

Sebastian:  Ah, but then this fanfic is much more rooted in
      reality than the manga.  This one I could almost imagine as
      a movie with real actors.  And for real life that kind of
      punch is truly impressive.


: The cask hit the ground and burst, sending water flying
: everywhere. The umbrella bounced in front of Akane, opening and
: protecting her from the spray.

Angus, Jennifur & Sebastian:  Phew!


: Ranma ran over and knelt next to him. In the bottom of the barrel,
: some water still remained. No more than a couple of handfuls
: worth.
: 
: Ranma and Ryoga looked at each other. "Just enough for one
: person," Ryoga said, his face and tone neutral.

Angus:  It's always the same:  Only one escape pod, only enough
      food for one to survive, only enough Nannichuan water for
      one cure.


: "Then I met you. You loved me, and you knew about my curse. You
: weren't in love with anyone else. In you, I could find happiness.
: But I had become so accustomed to misery, I found it strangely
: hard to let go of it. I still needed Akane's affection, and the
: agony I felt being torn between the two of you was greater than
: any I had ever felt before."

Angus:  Ye gods, a misery addict.  "You know, I thought I could
      give it up any time, but when I stopped, I began feeling so
      *good*...  I just couldn't bear it."


: Ryoga's world came to an end. He collapsed on the ground, letting
: his tears flow, not caring. He could see the barrel within arm's
: reach. He didn't care about that, either.
: 
: The world was a dark and lonely place.

Angus:  Tell us something new.

Sebastian:  <sniffle> Cynic!


: Akane stared at him. She seemed to relent a little. "That's the
: one thing you've done consistenly, Ranma. You've always kept your
: promises. I'm not happy about this whole situation, but I can't
: blame you for it."

Angus:  That's a first!

Sebastian:  Heh, yes, in the past she had no problems blaming
      Ranma for anything she wanted.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  Yes, indeed, just like Ryouga in that respect.  But
      she, too, seems to have matured somewhat.


: Kasumi chided him gently, still smiling. "Now, now, Ryoga-kun, if
: she never wanted to see you again, she would have gotten in her
: car and gone away. She went into the house and stayed there
: because she wants you to know how mad she is, but she also wants
: you to come after her." She bent over and looked into his eyes.
: "Go, Ryoga-kun. She wants you. She loves you. All you have to do
: is to tell her that you want and love her, too."

Angus:  gives up too fast, doesn't he?

Sebastian:  Easy for you to say, now that Kasumi explained it. 
      I'd like to see you in that situation.

Angus:  *I* wouldn't.


: Ranma wanted to get married.
: 
: And oh God she wanted to also.

Sebastian:  [dabs at his eyes]  Perfect.  That whole internal
      dialogue with the ever returning mantra "Ranma wanted to get
      married" was perfect.  No other word for it.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  All right, except that.


: Like a muscle that had been tense for a long time, something
: relaxed inside Ryoga. The depression that was always a part of his
: existence began to lessen more and more. Ryoga realized there were
: alternatives to unhappiness. Good alternatives. He wanted to
: explore them, starting with the woman he held in his arms.

Angus:  Heh heh.

Sebastian:  Very good metaphor, that "muscle" image.


: He looked at Akane. She was smiling at him. "It's what you wanted.
: You don't have to be half a man anymore."

Angus:  And no fun anymore, too.

Sebastian:  Indeed.  Who'd want to read about a superhuman martial
      artist if he doesn't even turn into a girl.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  No, I was *not* just thinking of the lemons.


: "So be it. You two have, this day, demonstrated your complete and
: total faith in each other. By virtue of the powers vested in me, I
: now declare you one soul, husband and wife, lawfully joined."
: 
: The court administrator smiled again. "You may, at your
: convenience, kiss the bride."
: 
: Ranma fought to keep his hands from shaking as he lifted his
: wife's veil. She was looking at him, eager, loving. They kissed,
: and the sound of cheering buoyed them as they lost themselves in
: each other.

Jennifur:  <sigh>

Sebastian:  <sniffle>  [blows his nose]

Angus:  I was waiting the whole time for rain to set in.  Wouldn't
      it've been fun if they had been declared "Wife and wife",
      huh?

Sebastian:  No. <sniffle>  Drop dead.


: "Wo ai ni," she whispered in his ear, so soft she could barely
: hear herself. She looked down and turned away.

Angus:  I wonder what that means.

Sebastian:  I guess you don't really need a translation to know
      what it means.  [takes another tissue]


: Mousse looked at her uncertainly. Good. He should never assume too
: much about her, never believe he knew what she was thinking.
: 
: But he shouldn't be completely in the dark, either. She reached
: over and took his hand. He smiled and seemed to grow two feet.
: 
: Shampoo smiled back at him. It was a beginning.

Jennifur:  <sigh>

Angus & Sebastian:  <sniffle>


: Ranma smiled and clasped his hand. For a moment, they squeezed
: each other's hand very tightly, yet another contest. Ryoga let go,
: however; no need to embarrass Ranma on his wedding day.

Jennifur:  Myow?

Sebastian:  They'll *never* change.


: Nabiki watched from a distance as Tatewaki stood in front of Akane
: and Ranma spouting phrase after phrase of some sonnet or other.
: Something about parts of the body fighting with each other; it
: sounded awfully boring. Both Ranma and Akane had glazed
: expressions; they weren't getting it much, either.

Angus:  Whazzat?

Sebastian:  Heh heh, Richard's poking some fun at the
      shakespearean poem that lent this fic its title.


: Akane rushed up to her. "Nabiki..." They stared at each other.
: Akane's eyes were moist. Nabiki discovered, somewhat to her
: disgust, that hers were as well.

Sebastian:  I was on the verge of tears for most of the after-
      wedding-scenes, which is not a pleasant experience, since it
      makes my right eye hurt like buggery.


: He bent down and kissed her and it went on from there. This time,
: he got it right.

Sebastian:  Heh, I was never more grateful for a little laugh than
      now.


: Ukyo sighed and decided she couldn't put it off any longer. Just
: about everyone was gone, and Ranma and Akane looked very tired. It
: had been a long day for them.

Angus:  Uh oh, here it comes.


: Ukyo calmed herself and stared at Ranma once more. Looking at him,
: she could finally remove the last traces of him from her heart. A
: good friend, yes, but never any more. She was glad she had faced
: him, glad that she could talk to him without the yearning eating
: at her soul. She looked forward to his and Akane's friendship.
: 
: She also looked forward to finding someone very much like him for
: herself. It would be a difficult search.
: 
: She held out her hand. Ranma looked at it, grabbed it, and hauled
: her in for a hug. She laughed and hugged him. It felt good, as
: between friends.
: 
: She released him, took one more look at Akane and Ranma together,
: then turned and left.

Angus:  Waaaaaahhh!

Sebastian:  Waaaaaahhh!

Jennifur:  [resigned]  Myow.


: Nodoka walked closer to him, to peer into his eyes. "I have always
: known you to be an immature and irresponsible person. I held
: little hope that you would learn what it was to be an adult. But
: when *I* learn duty and responsibilty from *you*, it is a sign
: that you have changed. For the better."
: 
: She reached up and patted him on the cheek. "Let us return to our
: house, my husband."
: 
: Joy filled Genma, a kind he had not known for twenty years. He
: felt his face cracking into the biggest smile he had let loose in
: a very long time.

Sebastian:  <sniffle>  Help!  When is this happy ending finally
      over?!


: Akane let out a long breath. "I'm glad, Ranma. You shouldn't be
: afraid of who you are. I remember how much I liked you when I
: thought you were a girl. It took me most of a year to rediscover
: the part of you that I saw in you that first time. It was that
: part of you that I fell in love with. I might never have tried to
: find it if I hadn't seen it in your female half first."
: 
: That took Ranma by surprise. He had never considered that. He
: remembered Akane smiling at him, asking him if he wanted to be
: friends with her. She might never have asked if he had been a guy.
: And they wouldn't be standing here now.

Sebastian:  Heh, as you know, I have a different opinion, but that
      doesn't change how wonderful this is.

Jennifur:  Myow.

Sebastian:  OK, So I'm advertising my own work, so what?!


: One part of two. Ranma never wanted to know of any other fraction
: ever again.
: 
: THY INWARD LOVE - THE END

Sebastian and Angus both reach for the last tissue.  It is pulled
this way and that, before finally salomonically tearing in the
middle.  Both blow their nose noisily.

Sebastian:  Th-This marks the end of my longest C&C to date.

Angus:  We hope to have been of some help, even though there was not 
      too much actual criticism, since the fic was so wonderful.

Sebastian:  And now we bid you all...

Jennifur:  Myow.